Three months later…“This isn’t it” I muttered closing the file in front of me before putting it back in the storage box, along with the other files I had gone through. I glanced around the storage room lit by a single faulty bulb and the lamp I started to bring with me after the third day here. This was the only part of St john’s hospital that didn’t smell like bleach or medication. I inhaled deeply and picked another file. I came here four times a week at minimum, trying to find records of my birth, records of Camilla. Unfortunately, the hospital had not been digitized then and their organization method was absolute shit, therefore making the process harder.I wasn’t even sure her file was here. The records department had refused to partake in my search, but at least they let me be in here, all thanks to Hannah’s intervention. “Not it.” I muttered and put the next file away. As I reached for another one, my cell blared to life breaking the silence.I crawled on all fours to my
Not a bold smile, like I would expect, but one that conveyed vulnerability. Which seemed even scarier. I blinked rapidly hoping this specter from my past would disappear, but she persisted, and then began walking towards me. She was trying to cross the small street when I whirled around and climbed into my car, cringing at the force with which I slammed the door. “You slammed the door.” A very helpful Heidi pointed out. “Sorry doll.” I said quickly and paused. I had not heard that nickname in a while nor thought of ever saying it out-loud but here I was. Few seconds with his mother in sight and I was wigging out. “I’m not a doll, I’m a girl.” I didn’t turn back but I knew her nose and brows were scrunched up in a disgusted frown. I started the car and glanced behind, before slipping out of my parking space. I gripped the steering wheel tightly to stop my hands from shaking. What was it? Fear? I was scared. Not of Elizabeth but of what she signified. Pierce. What was
Lost his mind?Elizabeth stared me down while I processed her words. Pierce lost his mind? This was the part where I should tell her I still didn’t care, check on Heidi and get the hell out of here.I swallowed, my feet rooted to the spot. “Go on.” I said finally, forcing my expression to stay blank. “Two months ago, I wanted to reach out to him for some…personal reasons. He was not in his office. And that secretary of his told me he was home, and that whatever thing that needed handling, he or the COO would take of it. Obviously I wanted to talk to my son directly. So I tried home, and the guards wouldn’t even let me through the gate. I’m his mother, and they blatantly refused.” “Is this the part where I feel sorry for you.” I asked pointedly, why was she blabbering about unimportant things anyway. She should be telling me about Pierce. Annoyance flickered across her face. And I could see the goody act for what it was. She tucked it behind a mask again. “When I questioned his s
I scoffed, raising my feet off the soft rug and hugging it to myself. “So he’s done stalking me all over the city and now wants to guilt trip me into coming to him?” “Do you think that’s what this is?” Angie asked calmly. I blew out a breath, avoiding her gaze. “No.” She smiled, “what do you think it is then?” “I don’t know.” I shrugged “he’s having a mid life crisis? it doesn’t matter what he’s doing, he just has to stop it. I might not love him anymore but I don’t want him to hurt himself.” She made no comment on the “don’t love him” part. Thank God. “So you’re gonna pay a visit to him?” I chewed on my bottom lip and leaned back in my chair. If I was going to his house, it had nothing to do with his mother’s request, like I said, I didn’t want anything horrible to happen to him. I had moved on from us, and it was time he did too. If he needed a little push from me then I would give him that. As a thank you for everything he had done for me. “I’m gonna have to tell Carter
Saturdays were our stay-at-home day. We would all pile into the kitchen to help, or bother Angie while she made food, or we would both do personal things; like me reading a book and Heidi doing her homework, but all in the kitchen. Today Heidi sat across from me on the counter, while Angie chopped carrots for her latest creation. I glanced up from my laptop and watched her, hair in pigtails, crossed legged and face scrunched in concentration as she moved her colored pencils over her current project. Peaceful.And yet, I didn’t feel that way deep down. My eyes moved to my phone again and I looked away for the dozenth time. I had made several calls to Carter, all of which he rejected. I got that he was upset but I really had good intentions when I wanted to visit Pierce. Of course that was off the table now. I would not jeopardize the relationship I was building with Carter to check on him. No matter how bad I thought he was doing. Because it wasn’t my problem. I told myself. Angie
I stood outside the gates of Pierce’s house willing for something to happen. Anything that would make me say ‘Pierce was fine’, climb back in our car and get the fuck out of here. “Ready?” Angie asked me, adjusting the bag of food and cleaning supplies we had brought with us. “Yeah.” I rooted in my bag for the key Trevor had given to me. We had passed two different security personnel so far, but here, there was no one. My heart beat frantically in my chest as I fixed the key in the lock and twisted, bracing myself for what we were going to see before I pushed it open. The outside of the bouse didnt look bad. Sure, a few blades of grass had managed to make a home in different parts of the concrete but that was about it. Save for it looking completely abandoned, nothing seemed amiss. It made me wonder if he had even stepped out of the house all this time. When we entered the house, Angie sneezed, dropping her bags on the floor to grab a kerchief. A sheen of dust covered every su
I made quick work of cleaning the kitchen while Angie worked on the living room. Pierce stayed in the kitchen with me, with the excuse that he was eating. I could feel his eyes burning into my back as I cleaned the fridge. God, I could barely believe my eyes when I turned in the living room. For a second I wondered if Pierce’s house had been broken into, and the long haired, bearded, hunched man in front of me was a hobo. It took a while for me to wrap my head around the fact that it was Pierce. He had lost so much weight. I could feel all his ribs when I went to help him, but that didn’t change how strong he was…My body lit up at the memory of how he held me, his hands skating delicately across my skin. Even now, I could not deny my body’s reaction to him. There are somethings you make peace with. This was one of them for me. But being attracted to him, did not mean I would be disloyal to Carter. I came here for one thing and as soon as that was completed, I would leave. “You’re
I pushed other papers out of the way, revealing more photographs. With them in my hands I sat back on my knees, and tried to comit every photo to my memory. “You shouldn’t have these.” I said, my voice shaking. “Myra-““Why do you have them, when did you take them?” That last question was irrelevant. He had taken them at the hospital, while I was holding Yvette. One of the photos was a close replica to the portrait he had given me. I didn’t even hear a camera click. In one photo, Yvette’s face was scrunched up, she looked like she was winking at the camera. My hand brushed her downy hair, my throat closing up with emotion.“Hey sweet pea.” I whispered, and looked at another photograph. “They’re all I have of both of you.” He said and I turned. He had lowered himself to the floor, not very close to me. New clothes clverred his body and water dripped down feom his wet hair. “I…wanted to give them to you. But, you took all of Yvette’s ashes and I…I just needed something to remind me
Angie had come down with a fever by morning. The first sign that something was wrong was the factvthat she had not gotten up earlier than me and Heidi. After a dose of painkillers, I left her to sleep and got Heidi ready for school. I knew that if her symptoms persisted, there was no way in hell I would be going to Pierce’s house. Not alone. I would’ve called Trevor but I felt like seeing him, would cause Pierce to withdraw further. Like a reminder of all his responsibilities. That could come when he was ready. With one last check on Angie, I and Heidi piled into the car and went to her school, only to return an hour later. Angie had woken up and was in the kitchen buttering a piece of bread when we found her. She looked at us in surprise. “I thought you were off to school, and you on your way to his house?”I shook my head. “I mean we did go to school, but classes are canceled.” I opened the fridge and took out a sealed plate of gelato.“Lice.” Heidi volunteered. “yup. So till th
I pushed other papers out of the way, revealing more photographs. With them in my hands I sat back on my knees, and tried to comit every photo to my memory. “You shouldn’t have these.” I said, my voice shaking. “Myra-““Why do you have them, when did you take them?” That last question was irrelevant. He had taken them at the hospital, while I was holding Yvette. One of the photos was a close replica to the portrait he had given me. I didn’t even hear a camera click. In one photo, Yvette’s face was scrunched up, she looked like she was winking at the camera. My hand brushed her downy hair, my throat closing up with emotion.“Hey sweet pea.” I whispered, and looked at another photograph. “They’re all I have of both of you.” He said and I turned. He had lowered himself to the floor, not very close to me. New clothes clverred his body and water dripped down feom his wet hair. “I…wanted to give them to you. But, you took all of Yvette’s ashes and I…I just needed something to remind me
I made quick work of cleaning the kitchen while Angie worked on the living room. Pierce stayed in the kitchen with me, with the excuse that he was eating. I could feel his eyes burning into my back as I cleaned the fridge. God, I could barely believe my eyes when I turned in the living room. For a second I wondered if Pierce’s house had been broken into, and the long haired, bearded, hunched man in front of me was a hobo. It took a while for me to wrap my head around the fact that it was Pierce. He had lost so much weight. I could feel all his ribs when I went to help him, but that didn’t change how strong he was…My body lit up at the memory of how he held me, his hands skating delicately across my skin. Even now, I could not deny my body’s reaction to him. There are somethings you make peace with. This was one of them for me. But being attracted to him, did not mean I would be disloyal to Carter. I came here for one thing and as soon as that was completed, I would leave. “You’re
I stood outside the gates of Pierce’s house willing for something to happen. Anything that would make me say ‘Pierce was fine’, climb back in our car and get the fuck out of here. “Ready?” Angie asked me, adjusting the bag of food and cleaning supplies we had brought with us. “Yeah.” I rooted in my bag for the key Trevor had given to me. We had passed two different security personnel so far, but here, there was no one. My heart beat frantically in my chest as I fixed the key in the lock and twisted, bracing myself for what we were going to see before I pushed it open. The outside of the bouse didnt look bad. Sure, a few blades of grass had managed to make a home in different parts of the concrete but that was about it. Save for it looking completely abandoned, nothing seemed amiss. It made me wonder if he had even stepped out of the house all this time. When we entered the house, Angie sneezed, dropping her bags on the floor to grab a kerchief. A sheen of dust covered every su
Saturdays were our stay-at-home day. We would all pile into the kitchen to help, or bother Angie while she made food, or we would both do personal things; like me reading a book and Heidi doing her homework, but all in the kitchen. Today Heidi sat across from me on the counter, while Angie chopped carrots for her latest creation. I glanced up from my laptop and watched her, hair in pigtails, crossed legged and face scrunched in concentration as she moved her colored pencils over her current project. Peaceful.And yet, I didn’t feel that way deep down. My eyes moved to my phone again and I looked away for the dozenth time. I had made several calls to Carter, all of which he rejected. I got that he was upset but I really had good intentions when I wanted to visit Pierce. Of course that was off the table now. I would not jeopardize the relationship I was building with Carter to check on him. No matter how bad I thought he was doing. Because it wasn’t my problem. I told myself. Angie
I scoffed, raising my feet off the soft rug and hugging it to myself. “So he’s done stalking me all over the city and now wants to guilt trip me into coming to him?” “Do you think that’s what this is?” Angie asked calmly. I blew out a breath, avoiding her gaze. “No.” She smiled, “what do you think it is then?” “I don’t know.” I shrugged “he’s having a mid life crisis? it doesn’t matter what he’s doing, he just has to stop it. I might not love him anymore but I don’t want him to hurt himself.” She made no comment on the “don’t love him” part. Thank God. “So you’re gonna pay a visit to him?” I chewed on my bottom lip and leaned back in my chair. If I was going to his house, it had nothing to do with his mother’s request, like I said, I didn’t want anything horrible to happen to him. I had moved on from us, and it was time he did too. If he needed a little push from me then I would give him that. As a thank you for everything he had done for me. “I’m gonna have to tell Carter
Lost his mind?Elizabeth stared me down while I processed her words. Pierce lost his mind? This was the part where I should tell her I still didn’t care, check on Heidi and get the hell out of here.I swallowed, my feet rooted to the spot. “Go on.” I said finally, forcing my expression to stay blank. “Two months ago, I wanted to reach out to him for some…personal reasons. He was not in his office. And that secretary of his told me he was home, and that whatever thing that needed handling, he or the COO would take of it. Obviously I wanted to talk to my son directly. So I tried home, and the guards wouldn’t even let me through the gate. I’m his mother, and they blatantly refused.” “Is this the part where I feel sorry for you.” I asked pointedly, why was she blabbering about unimportant things anyway. She should be telling me about Pierce. Annoyance flickered across her face. And I could see the goody act for what it was. She tucked it behind a mask again. “When I questioned his s
Not a bold smile, like I would expect, but one that conveyed vulnerability. Which seemed even scarier. I blinked rapidly hoping this specter from my past would disappear, but she persisted, and then began walking towards me. She was trying to cross the small street when I whirled around and climbed into my car, cringing at the force with which I slammed the door. “You slammed the door.” A very helpful Heidi pointed out. “Sorry doll.” I said quickly and paused. I had not heard that nickname in a while nor thought of ever saying it out-loud but here I was. Few seconds with his mother in sight and I was wigging out. “I’m not a doll, I’m a girl.” I didn’t turn back but I knew her nose and brows were scrunched up in a disgusted frown. I started the car and glanced behind, before slipping out of my parking space. I gripped the steering wheel tightly to stop my hands from shaking. What was it? Fear? I was scared. Not of Elizabeth but of what she signified. Pierce. What was
Three months later…“This isn’t it” I muttered closing the file in front of me before putting it back in the storage box, along with the other files I had gone through. I glanced around the storage room lit by a single faulty bulb and the lamp I started to bring with me after the third day here. This was the only part of St john’s hospital that didn’t smell like bleach or medication. I inhaled deeply and picked another file. I came here four times a week at minimum, trying to find records of my birth, records of Camilla. Unfortunately, the hospital had not been digitized then and their organization method was absolute shit, therefore making the process harder.I wasn’t even sure her file was here. The records department had refused to partake in my search, but at least they let me be in here, all thanks to Hannah’s intervention. “Not it.” I muttered and put the next file away. As I reached for another one, my cell blared to life breaking the silence.I crawled on all fours to my