Chapter Sixteen

I wandered towards the kitchen slowly. My altercation with Jonathan was almost a week now and I had been successfully avoiding him. I was still scared and the thought still made my blood freeze over. It was not surprising that Jonathan had taken such a measure, what was surprising was why I had never imagined or thought that he would. I must have given him the benefit of doubt. 

He wasn’t human like the rest of us, he was a devil and he deserved death but death for him would mean the annihilation of my family, my clan and my kingdom. Our existence would be raised from the world. Just the thought made me freeze over and I hurried towards the kitchen again.

Juniper was taking a break by the time arrived. He shot up to his feet as soon as he saw me and rushed towards me.

“Are you okay?” he asked worriedly and I managed a small smile nodding my head as we found a place to sit down.

“You fainted and we weren’t allowed near the clinic no matter what. I was so worried and the next thing I was hearing, that you were assigned to the palace. I was scared and terrified. No one can go to the palace without being requested, that’s why I didn't dare come to find you” Juniper said and I laughed.

“Well I’m fine. Thank you very much” I replied, sighing softly.

“How’s the palace?” Juniper asked and I shrugged.

“Better” I answered way too honestly for my liking, “No one bullies me there, no one beats me up or makes fun of me, no one tries to make me feel useless and one of the other girls there, she’s so nice to meet and well I have been eating really well” I added and Juniper grinned at me, “I wanted to say that you were already gaining some meat back on your face.

“It’s that obvious?” I asked and Juniper shook his head, a sad smile on his face, “Not exactly but I know how emaciated you used to look and I know how you look now, such a stark difference, of course I would notice” he replied and I chuckled.

“Thank you for always being by my side,” I told him honestly.

Sometimes I had drifted off into thoughts wandering what I would have done without Juniper in some cases. He was just always there for me, even times I didn't want him to. I remembered how harsh I was to him when we first met and I chuckled loudly. I was so grateful that he hadn’t left me alone.

“How’s the kitchen?” I asked and Juniper chuckled, “Nothing special, the same, nothing new” he replied and I nodded staring off into space.

“Have you seen the King? Did you run into him at any time?” Juniper asked and my altercation with Jonathan a few days ago surfaced in my mind and I swallowed, nodding my head quietly.

“I work in the palace, there are very few maids in the palace, I would have surely run into him, I did once” I replied concealing everything else.

“Did you say anything to him?” Juniper asked and I shook my head, “What would I say to him?” I asked in reply and Juniper laughed.

“The King is merciful and kind and he’s just amazing Ami. He’s saved a lot of us here and has kept the kingdom safe, he’s really nice” Juniper said and I scoffed before I could stop myself.

“Nice?” I asked, “Nice?” I asked again and Juniper nodded his head, a confused expression crawling up his face while I laughed slowly.

“Yeah, he is nice” I replied with sarcasm dripping off my tone.

“I know you have a bias towards him and..” Juniper didn’t get to finish his statement when I stood up and cut him off, “Bias towards him?” I asked my voice notches higher.

“Bias against him?” I asked again, “Kidnapped me, dragged me to my kingdom in shambles and killed my father right in front of me and dragged me back and stripped me of my title. Threatened to erase my entire family and my kingdom and all that to you meant a bias?” I screamed as Juniper rose to his feet, embarrassed spreading all over his cheeks.

“Ami, I’m sorry. I…. i…i…” he stuttered and I shook my head, anger and hatred swimming all over me.

“No, you don’t get it. I know that he saved you so you think he’s nice. He’s the reason you are alive but look at me, I’m not even alive and it’s because of me. He’s not nice to me Juni, he’s a devil and to me, that’s all he’s ever going to be. A devil and a murderer and a bastard!’ I spat as I turned on my heel and started storming away. 

Tears rolled down my cheeks as I stormed away while frustration that had been pent up spread through my chest. I knew I shouldn't have argued or shouted at Juniper, I knew that he treated Jonathan with respect and with adoration for saving his life and sparing him. I knew that he didn’t know the specifics of what happened between me and Jonathan and yet I still took out my anger on him, my only friend. 

With what I had done, there was no assurance that he would ever talk to me again and it made my heart ache and made the tears run down my cheeks even more. I had no one on my side and yet the only one person I had on my side, I always found a way to make things wrong between us. My hatred for Jonathan deepened, why was he hostile to just me, when he gave everyone else grace and mercy, why couldn’t the grace extend to me? What exactly did I do wrong? Could I ever do anything good?

I didn’t know when I paused and bent down, sobbing loudly without any care in the world. It was hard living like this, every single day it got harder. I felt like dying but no sooner than the thought crossed my mind that Jonathan’s words surfaced in my head and although it was just his voice, I felt myself freeze over.