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THIRTY-THREE

last update Last Updated: 2022-03-15 22:34:00

NIKKI'S POV

I woke up when the bright rays of the morning sun caught my sleepy eyes. I rubbed my eyes, as I clutch the blanket tighter to cover my still naked body. I cursed inside my head when I felt a throbbing pain in my head. Damn, hangovers!

Unti-unti kong iminulat ang mga mata ko at bumungad sa akin ang pamilyar na kwarto ni Gale. I sighed, remembering what I did last night. I swear, hindi na talaga ako pupunta sa bar. I felt so ashamed and embarrassed of myself. Muntik na naman akong mapahamak dahil sa katigasan ng ulo ko.

Bumangon ako at hinanap ang mga damit ko, ngunit hindi ko iyon makita. Paika-ika akong naglakad papasok ng banyo, para maligo. I looked at my reflection in the mirror, and was beyond shocked to see a lot of marks in my body. Flashes of last night's rough lovemaking showed in my mind. I bit my lower lip, I can still feel Gale inside of me. Hindi ko alam kung ano'ng mararamdaman ko pagkatapos ng lahat ng nangyari.<
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  • Guilty Pleasures   THIRTY-FOUR

    NIKKI'S POVPaano nga ba natin nasusukat ang katatagan ng isang relasyon? Sa tagal ng pagsasama? Kung minsan, dumarating ang pagsubok sa mga panahon na hindi natin inaasahan.Kung kailan akala mo, maayos na ang lahat, saka darating ang sakuna. Bibiglain ka na lang, at magugulat ka na lang hindi na pala kayo nagkakaintindihan.I sighed for the nth time. Pagkatapos ng insidenteng iyon sa bar, pinangako ko sa sarili ko na hindi na ako tutungtong doon, kahit gaano pa man ka laki ang problema na kaharapin ko. It was monday, and I was back to work.Katulad ng inaasahan, Dad scolded me for being reckless. But after that, he gave me a hug. Alam ko naman, magagalit siya sa akin, pero hinding-hindi mababawasan ang pagmamahal niya sa akin. He lectured on me, reminded me on how to act maturely. Maging si ate ay tumawag para mangamusta, at para sermonan din ako.Of course, I perfectly understand where they're coming from. Alam ko na ayaw lang naman nila akong mapahamak. No one

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  • Guilty Pleasures   THIRTY-FIVE

    NIKKI'S POV"Do you think they will like it?" kinakabahan kong tanong kay Gale na ang tinutukoy ay ang regalong binili ko para sa parents niya. Isa iyong pares ng vintage collector's watch na pinaghirapan ko pang hanapin."Of course, Love. You have put so much effort in that gift. I know my parents will surely love it," Gale answered."I'm nervous, do I look good, love? Hindi ba ako overdressed or something?" I asked.Muli kong sinipat ang sarili ko sa salamin. Isang simpleng gown na kulay puti at tube style ang suot ko. Hapit na hapit ito sa katawan ko, at bahagyang nakikita ang cleavage ko.I complimented my face with a light make up. My hair was done in a messy bun, at may ilang takas na buhok sa gilid ng mukha ko. I sighed, feeling satisfied with the way I looked.Gale walked towards me, and stopped behind my back. He wrapped his hands on my waist, and rested his head on my shoulders."You look beautiful even without everything— dress and make-ups. You h

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  • Guilty Pleasures   THIRTY-SIX

    NIKKI'S POVIt was like the world suddenly stopped, and a bomb exploded right in my ears. I cannot begin to explain how terrible it felt to stand in this crowd, where everyone was cheering for the man I love and the woman, whom I thought was my friend. My heart literally broke into a million pieces, as I stood there, unable to move nor wipe the tears that were falling freely from eyes.What did I do to fucking deserve this?"Love... Please, let me explain..." Gale pleaded, but I only stared at him in confusion.The man Adhara was talking about, her first love, it was him. How come I had been so dumb?"Please, Gale. Don't come near me," I said in a quivering voice.Kulang ang salitang galit para ilarawan ang nararamdaman ko ngayon. Sagad hanggang buto ang sakit na nararamdaman ko. It was the worst kind of pain that I've ever felt in my entire life.Nakarinig kami ng bulungan at noon ko napansin na nasa amin na pala ang tingin ng mga bisita. Adhara stood smiling o

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  • Guilty Pleasures   THIRTY-SEVEN

    NIKKI'S POV"Did she eat already?"I heard Dad's worried voice. I'm not sure how long I slept, but when I slowly opened my eyes, it's already dark outside."Dad, Ate..." I called them.Agad silang napalingon sa akin, at muli ay nabalot ng pag-aalala ang kanilang mga mukha."Are you hungry, anak? Nicole, get your sister some food," utos ni Dad.Umiling ako. Hindi naman ako nagugutom, nasasaktan ako. Mas mabuti pang matulog na lang ako buong araw para hindi ko maalala ang sakit. Kapag gising ako, parang sirang plaka na paulit-ulit sa isipan ko ang mga nangyari.Ate Nicole walked out of the room to get me food. Bumangon ako at sinandal ang likod ko sa head board ng kama. Isang araw na pala ang lumipas, kaya ko pa bang magpatuloy?"Kumusta ka, anak?" si Dad.He sat down on my bed, and held my hand. I turned my gaze to him, and inhaled a deep breath. I asked myself the same question for so many times, and I know I'm not okay. It will take so much time befor

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  • Guilty Pleasures   THIRTY-EIGHT

    NIKKI'S POV"Dominique, Love! Mag-usap tayo, please..."Naalimpungatan ako nang makarinig ako nang malakas na sigaw at kasunod niyon ay ang pagkalampag sa gate namin. Mula sa bintana ng kwarto ko na nasa second floor ng bahay, ay kitang-kita ko si Gale na nakatayo sa harapan ng gate namin. Ilang beses niyang pinukpok at kinalampag ang bakal na gate, ngunit parang hindi niya iniinda ang sakit.Lumabas ang isa naming katulong at sinubukan siyang kausapin, ngunit patuloy siyang nagpumilit."Please! Alam kong nariyan siya sa loob. Please, hayaan niyo naman akong makausap siya, oh. Love! Hindi ako aalis dito hanggat di mo ako kinakausap!" sigaw niya.Umalis ako sa bintana nang dumako roon ang kanyang paningin. Sobrang lakas ng tibok ng puso ko at pakiramdam ko ay para na itong sasabog. Isang araw ko pa lang siyang hindi nakikita, pero parang kay tagal na. My chest hurt big time, thinking about how he could say those words without remembering what he did to me. How can

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  • Guilty Pleasures   THIRTY-NINE

    NIKKI'S POV"Sigurado ka na ba riyan sa desisyon mo?" hindi makapaniwalang tanong ni Camille.We were in the garden. It's saturday, and she decided to visit me since it's her day off. I sighed, isang linggo na pala ang dumaan. Isang linggo na puro sakit ang nararamdaman ko."I think it's for the best, Mille. Kapag nanatili ako rito, palagi ko lang silang maaalala. They are haunting me, Mille. Hindi ako makatulog ng maayos, at hindi rin ako matahimik. Everytime I see Gale's face, bumabalik ang sakit sa puso ko," I explained.I can't deny that I still love him. Hindi iyon nawala, at malabong mawala, pero mas nangingibabaw ang sakit. Bukod doon, mas komplikado na ang relasyon namin ngayon dahil sa mga nalaman ko."Nakakalungkot. Bakit kasi kailangan na humantong sa ganito? Akala ko pa naman siya na talaga," nanghihinayang niyang wika.I smiled weakly, "Akala ko nga rin, eh. Pero ganoon talaga ang buhay. Hindi lahat ng gusto natin ay nakukuha natin. Hindi lahat ng

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  • Guilty Pleasures   FORTY

    NIKKI'S POV"Mag-iingat ka roon, ha. Don't forget to call us often," bilin ni Ate.We were standing outside the airport, an hour before I board my plane. Kasama namin si Daddy, Camille at ang kambal. Ngumiti ako sa kanya at tumango."Of course, Ate. Tatawag ako parati sa inyo. Mami-miss ko kayong lahat," naluluha kong sagot.I gripped my luggage tightly, trying to draw strength from it. Sa pag-alis kong ito ay mabigat ang dibdib ko. Iiwan ko sa lugar na ito ang lahat ng sakit at sama ng loob na nararamdaman ko. Iiwan ko sa lugar na ito ang puso ko at ang taong mahal ko."Girl ha, one chat away lang ako. Kapag inatake ka ng homesickness, don't hesitate to give me a call ha. Kahit nasa trabaho ako, sasagutin ko talaga ang tawag mo. Hindi naman ako pagagalitan ng boss ko, 'di ba Tito?" malokong sambit ni Camille.We all shared a laugh because of her remarks. That's what I really love about her. She could turn every serious moment into funny ones. Isa ito sa mga ba

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  • Guilty Pleasures   FORTY-ONE

    NIKKI'S POVI woke up to the loud ringing of my phone. Pupungas-pungas akong nagmulat ng mga mata ko at sandali pang napatulala nang na-realize ko na wala ako sa kwarto ko. It took me several minutes before realizing that I'm in Paris!Hinanap ko ang cellphone ko na kanina pa tumutunog. I smiled when I saw Ate's name on the screen."Ano ba, ate? Isang araw pa nga lang akong naka-alis, miss mo na agad ako?" I joked as I answered her video call."Tita Mommy! Where are you?" sigaw ng kambal habang nag-aagawan sa cellphone ni Ate."Nandito ako ngayon sa Paris. See that? That's the Eiffel Tower," saad ko sabay turo sa Eiffel Tower na malapit lang sa Hotel na tinutuluyan ko."Wow! I want to go there too, Tita Mommy!" namamanghang saad ni Thea."Sa susunod, I will bring you here," tugon ko.Naiiling na lang ako nang makita ko silang patalon-talon pa."How are you? Nakapaglibot ka na ba riyan?" sabik na tanong ni Ate."Ate, kagigising ko lang. It's only sev

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  • Guilty Pleasures   LAST CHAPTER

    NIKKI'S POVThe bright rays of the morning sun touched our skin, making us feel a lot warmer today. I looked around, and took a deep breath, realizing how peaceful this place is.I stood in front of a grave. Nandito ako para magpaalam, at makipag-usap sa isang tao na matagal ng nawala sa mundong ito. This will be the last time, because after this, I will surely go somewhere far away."Are you sure about this?" Gale asked from behind me.Lumingon ako sa kanya at ngumiti. I've never been sure. Napagtanto ko na kapag hinayaan ko ang sarili ko na masaktan habang buhay, ako ang talo. Kasi ang taong nanakit sa akin ay matagal nang tahimik sa kabilang buhay, habang ako, nandito pa rin sa pahina kung saan puro sakit at pighati ang nararamdaman ko."Y-yes, I am." I cleared my throat. "This is the only way for me to move forward, Gale. I needed to let this one out. I need to let go of my pain, and my anger...""I know." He replied.Lumapit siya sa akin at marahan niyang hinaplos ang mukha ko, sa

  • Guilty Pleasures   SEVENTY-ONE

    GALE'S POV"Nooooo!"A loud scream left my lips as I saw Adhara's car crashing to a ten-wheeler truck. Bumigat ang dibdib ko, at parang hindi ako makahinga habang tinitingnan ang wasak na sasakyan. Kusang tumulo ang luha mula sa mga mata ko.Mabilis kong itinigil ang sasakyan, hindi iniinda ang sakit na nanalaytay sa balikat ko. Bumaba ako at lumapit sa sasakyan. My heart was racing, fear consumed me.No! God, no! This isn't happening!Gusto kong paniwalain ang sarili ko na panaginip lang ito, pero ang eksenang tumambad sa akin ay patunay na totoo ang lahat ng ito.Wasak ang unahang bahagi ng sasakyan, at kita ko ang duguang katawan ni Adhara. Naipit ang dalawa niyang paa. Sa passenger side naman ay nandoon si Dominique. Wala siyang malay, at puno rin siya ng dugo. Kumabog ang dibdib ko nang makita ko ang dugong umaagos sa kanyang binti.Fuck, no! Our child!Wala sa sarili kong kinatok ang bintana, pilit siyang ginigising ngunit nanatili siyang walang malay. Ayaw kong isipin na... Hind

  • Guilty Pleasures   SEVENTY

    GALE'S POV"No! Dominique!" sigaw ko habang dinidiinan ang paghawak sa balikat ko, kung saan tumama ang bala.Dali-dali akong tumayo sa tulong ng mga magulang ko at susuray-suray na tumakbo palabas ng bahay. Sinubukan kong habulin sina Adhara, ngunit hindi ko na sila naabutan pa."Gale, we need to take you to the hospital!" histerikal na sigaw ni Mommy."No, Mom! I won't go anywhere until I find Dominique and Adhara. Call the police!" I instructed.Mabilis kong tinungo ang sasakyan ko at nagmaneho palabas ng village. She wouldn't have gone that far yet.I hissed from the pain that filled my system. Kinagat ko ang labi ko para pigilan ang pagsigaw. Sandali akong tumigil sa tabi ng kalsada. I tore a part of my shirt and wrapped it around my shoulder. Napapikit ako at napamura sa sakit, pero hindi ko iyon ininda. I have to find Dominique. Kapag may nangyaring masama sa kanya at sa anak namin ay hindi ko mapapatawad ang sarili ko.I wasted no time. Muli kong pinatakbo ang sasakyan at mabil

  • Guilty Pleasures   SIXTY-NINE

    NIKKI'S POVMy mouth parted and my heart started beating so loud, seeing the look on Adhara's face. She's standing on the doorway, her hands were inside the pocket of her black cloak. Hindi ko naintindihan ang kaba na biglang lumukob sa akin, hindi ko na siya makilala. She's far too different from the Adhara I knew a year ago.Siguro nga ay pagpapapanggap lang ang pinakita niya sa akin noon, pero gusto ko pa ring paniwalaan na may kabutihan pa rin sa puso niya. However, seeing her face right now, I could only think of the worse. Masama ang tingin niya sa aming lahat.I gulped when she started walking towards us. Instinctively, Gale pulled me to his side."What are you doing here, Adhara?" Gale's voice was stern, and serious."I came here to claim what's mine," she said.Napasinghap ako, lalo na nang makita ko ang kakaibang ngisi sa mukha niya. She looked like she lost her mind, and the way she laughed, I can't stop thinking that maybe she lost her sanity."Akin ka lang, Gale. You promi

  • Guilty Pleasures   SIXTY-EIGHT

    NIKKI'S POV"I'm really sorry for everything..."Hindi ako makapaniwala sa narinig ko. Tita Graciella was sitting in front of me, asking for forgiveness. It was something I never expected. After all, hindi maganda ang naging huling pag-uusap namin.I cleared the lump in my throat, trying so hard to stop myself from tearing up. Something warm touched my heart, and I felt as if it was burning. I always imagined how it would feel to make amends with her. And now I knew, the word happiness will never fit the way I'm feeling right now."I know saying sorry isn't enough to compensate for all the damage and pain that I caused you, but please know that I am sincere. I'm really sorry for all the things I did," she said, her voice started to crack.Her tears spilled uncontrollably from her eyes. Something told me that she's not lying. Her eyes held truth, and genuine regret.Hindi ko na rin napigilan ang sarili ko na umiyak. Bumalik sa isipan ko ang lahat ng masasakit na salitang binitawan niya

  • Guilty Pleasures   SIXTY-SEVEN

    LOUIE'S POVI glanced on my wristwatch, it's already a quarter past three which means she's already fifteen minutes late. I sighed, and told myself to wait for another fifteen minutes, and if she doesn't show herself yet, I will leave.The door suddenly opened, and I saw her walking inside with her eyes settling on me. Sa unang pagkakataon ay nakita ko siyang ngumiti ulit sa akin.Kumalabog ang dibdib ko at hindi ko maipaliwanag ang nararamdaman ko. It's been years, but the regret I felt for not telling her the truth is still eating me."Gracie..." I whispered her name."Louie... It's been ages," came her reply.Binalot kami ng katahimikan. Nanatili lang ang mga mata ko sa kanya, pilit na inaalala ang dating Graciella na naging kaibigan ko. She's still beautiful and regal, the past years did a good job in maintaining her beauty.Habang nakatingin sa kanya ay napagtanto ko na iba na siya sa dating babae na minsan ay naging parte ng buhay ko. And along the memories of our friendship, the

  • Guilty Pleasures   SIXTY-SIX

    GRACIELLA'S POV"Dominique is pregnant..."His words kept ringing inside my head. I couldn't take it! I wanted so bad to be mad at him, but when I looked at his eyes, I could see how happy he was. His eyes were filled with different emotions, and I knew it was all he ever wanted.Am I that heartless?Am I that selfish?Dominique stayed sitting on the couch, as Gale walked towards her, occupying the space beside her. He kissed her forehead, and it broke my heart. Gustong-gusto ko na hayaan sila, pero sa tuwing naaalala ko ang mga nangyari noon, hindi ko maiwasan na magalit.I trusted her parents, but they broke my trust.Unable to take the sight in front of me, I slowly backed down and left their apartment. Parang nawalan na rin ako ng lakas na pilitin pa si Gale dahil alam ko na mali ako. Alam kong mali ako, pero hindi ko pa rin talaga matanggap na sa dinami-rami ng mga taong pwede niyang mahalin, ang anak pa talaga ni Diana.Dali-dali akong sumakay sa sasakyan ni Ara na naghihintay sa

  • Guilty Pleasures   SIXTY-FIVE

    GALE'S POV"Dominique is pregnant."My own voice resonating in my ears. Malakas na kumabog ang dibdib ko, lalo na nang makita kong nag-iba ang ekspresyon sa mukha ni Tito Louie. Alam ko, I haven't yet done much to prove myself worthy of Dominique, but this pregnancy was unexpected. Nevertheless, I don't regret having her pregnant. The only thing I felt upon knowing about it is pure happiness.Umigting ang panga ni Tito Louie, habang si Nicole at Camille naman ay parang na-estatwa at hindi agad nakapagsalita.Naramdaman ko ang init ng palad ni Dominique nang ipatong niya ang kanyang kamay sa kamay kong nanginginig."D-Dad..." bulong niya.Ramdam na ramdam ko ang kaba at takot niya. Kitang-kita ko sa kanyang mga mata ang pangamba."What's your plan now?" Tito Louie asked.His voice was strained, but he didn't sound angry. Napalingon ako sa kanya, ngunit wala pa ring nagbago sa ekspresyon ng mukha niya. Seryoso pa rin ito at hindi kakikitaan ng kahit anong emosyon.Napatingin ako kay Domi

  • Guilty Pleasures   SIXTY-FOUR

    NIKKI'S POVI paced back and forth inside our room. I was restless, and worried about my family's reaction to our news. Our pregnancy wasn't planned, but it was the best thing that happened to us. And I'm hoping that this baby may unite our family, and strengthen our ties."Relax, everything's going to be okay," Gale whispered, wrapping his hands around my waist and giving me a soft kiss on my shoulder blades.I instantly relaxed under his touch."How can I?" I whispered back."I'm here, hindi ko kayo pababayaan. I will fight the world for you, love," he assured me.I nodded my head, and turned to meet his eyes. I can see the sincerity and honesty brooding in his eyes. He gave me a small smile before lowering his lips to capture mine.A few minutes later, we were already inside the car, driving towards the restaurant where we had a dinner reservation. We decided to let my family know first. As much as I wanted to invite Gale's family, I know it would only be full of tension and awkward

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