Chapter 6

Chapter Six

Hindi ko na alam ilang beses ba ako bumuntong hininga simula kanina. Nagiging habit ko na yata ito simula nang dito tumira si Sebastian. I asked Niu about it but he would just shrug at sasabihin niyang hindi niya alam. Nakakainis kasi hindi ko na alam ang gagawin dito sa bahay. Every time that he’s around I get so conscious and it’s stressing me out. I noticed his every move and I get conscious with myself and with how I look and smell whenever he’s around.

“Claire, mom’s here,” sigaw ni Niu.

I developed this habit of locking myself in the bathroom whenever I want to think about things. It’s like it became my own personal space ever since I married Niu. Dito sa banyo ay p’wede akong maging totoo sa sarili ko, I don’t have to pretend that I’m happy in front of everybody. Dito sa banyo, I can talk to myself in the mirror, poured out my heart’s content.

I heaved a deep sigh and turned to the door.

“Mauna ka nang bumaba. I’ll be out in a few.” Binuksan ko ng bahagya ang pinto ng banyo para ipaalam sa kanya na mauna na siyang bumaba.

Mabilis na hinubad ko ang nightgown at tumapat sa shower para maligo. My mother-in-law is here for the gown selection para sa nalalapit niyang 65^th birthday party. She’s one of the icons here in the country for being the first Filipina to be crowned as Miss Universe. Her beauty is ethereal na talaga namang napasa niya pa sa mga anak niya ang angking kagandahan.

I blow-dried my hair and put it into a messy bun. I wore a spaghetti strap maxi dress in white with floral details. Hindi na ako nag-make up, I just put a red lipstick to compliment my bare face. Sinipat ko ang sarili sa salamin at napangiti ako sa nakita. Simple yet elegant, iyan palagi ang sinasabi ng mama ko. A woman who wears less is resembles elegance. Contented with how I look, I started out the door going to the magnificent staircase. Nasa receiving area na silang lahat; my mother-in-law was talking to a woman, Sebastian and Niu settled themselves in the sofa and discussing something.

Mama noticed me as I descended down the stairs, malapad ang ngiti niya nang makita niya ako. I looked at where Sebastian was sitting and I saw him looking intently at me, his expression was blank but I could see a hint of adoration in it.

“Claire, hija!” Mahigpit akong niyakap ng mama ni Niu nang makalapit ako sa kanila. Sinipat niya ang itsura ko at lalong lumawak ang ngiti niya sa akin. Her smile and beauty are ageless. Talaga namang napakaganda pa rin ng isang Amalia Altamirano. She like an antique, the more she gets old the more priceless she became. Isa siya sa mga naging inspirasyon ko no’ng panahong sumasabak ako sa mga pageants.

“Hello po, ma,” magulang na bati ko sa kanya. Ginantihan ko ang yakap niya at bumeso sa kanya pagkatapos.

“Ang ganda mo talaga, hija,” puri niya. She smiled adoringly at me that made me blushed. Her compliments means so much to me because she’s one of the women that I really look up to.

“Thank you, ma. Kayo rin po, you don’t look near sixty-five.” Umabante ako at mahinang bumulong sa kanya.

Malakas siya tumawa sa sinabi ko. Namangha ako sa paraan ng pagtawa niya. She’s so prim and elegant like a royalty. The way she smiles and move is always calculated like that of a true queen. How I wish I could have that kind of elegance she had.

“You always flatter me, hija,” natatawa niyang sabi. “By the way, this is Tasya, the top designer from Rattle,” she introduced me to a petite woman.

“Hi.” Ngumiti ako sa kanya at inilahad ko ang kamay. The woman is pretty in her bobcut hair. Her hair made her looked more cute and she has a friendly vibe, nakakagaan ‘yong ngiti niya. The way she dressed is a bit revealing, pero hindi naman iyon nakaka-distract.

“Tasya, darling. This is my beautiful daughter, Claire,” si mama.

“Hi, nice to finally meet you, I’ve heard so much about you,” Tasya said. Hindi nakaligtas sa akin ang makahulugang tingin na pinukol ni Tasya kay Sebastian bago muling bumaling sa akin at ngumiti.

“And these are my boys, Sebastian and Niu.”

“Hi,” bati niya sa dalawang lalaking nakaupo sa sofa. Malapad ang ngiti na ibinigay niya kaya napataas ang kilay ko. I noticed the way she glanced at Seb, it’s like they have something. Inilipat ko ang tingin kay Seb, I saw him smirked at me. Napaikot ang mga mata ko sa inasta niya, ang yabang talaga.

“We meet again,” said Seb. So, magkakilala pala talaga sila.

“You two know each other?” nagtatakang tanong ni mama. Nagpalipat-lipat ang mata niya dalawa.

“Uhh, yeah.” Tila hindi nito alam kung ano ang isasagot. She awkwardly smiled and right then and there I concluded there was really something between the two of them. May alam sila na hindi ko alam, and I don’t know why, but I felt betrayed.

Hindi ko alam pero biglang sumikip ang dibdib ko sa naisip. The idea that Sebastian was into someone that is not me poked something inside my chest, and I don’t like this feeling dahil alam ko kung ano ito. I should not feel this way towards my brother-in-law.

Tumigil ka, Claire!

Nakakahiya ka!

“So, let’s start,” sabi ni mama. Binalik ko ang tingin sa kanya at nakangiting tumango. Umupo ako sa sofa katabi ni Niu, katapat ko si Sebastian na prenteng naka de-kwatro habang ang dalawang braso ay nakapatong sa sandalan ng sofa. Hindi ko na siya tiningnan at itinuon ko ang pansin sa catalogue na nilagay ni Tasya sa center table.

“Darling, the motif of the party is gold and black, kaya gusto kong ganoon din ang kulay ng gown namin ni Claire. But I think I’ll go for the gold. How about you, dear?” tanong ni mama.

“I think black with gold details will look good on me,” sagot ko sa kanya. Patuloy ako sa pagpili ng mga designs na nakalagay sa catalogue. Rattle designers sure knows how to create beautiful gowns. There are a variety of designs to choose from. One particular design caught my attention, it was simple bodycon dress with extreme scoop back. Sleeves are made of lace with gold details.

“I think I like this one,” sabi ko. Pinakita ko kay mama ang design na napili ko at sumang-ayon naman siya dito.

“That’s perfect, dear,” komento ni mama. Hinayaan ko na siyang makipag-usap kay Tasya para sa gown na napili niya.

“You look good in everything you wear,” saad ni Niu na nasa tabi ko. Nilingon ko siya at nakita ko siyang nakatitig sa kapatid niya bago bumaling sa akin at hinapit ako sa bewang.

“What?” nagtatakang tanong ko sa kaniya.

I laughed awkwardly at what he said. Hindi naman kasi ganito si Niu. Well, sometimes we act like a real couple especially in front of the public, but certainly we don’t act like this kapag nasa bahay lang kami.