Yasmin:
This was it: 4th Grace Avenue. My heart skipped a beat and I nearly fell backwards trying to take in the tall and grand building. I did the sign of the cross on my chest and kissed my rosary. The priest had always warned us about the rich as well as places like this: havens for sin and evil, people tied to their wealth and their money, futile, buys them a spot in hell. The security guard let me in and led me to the front door. I gulped and looked at him. âWhat?â he snapped and I showed him my bandaged hands. His stiff face reddened slightly and his fist knocked heavily on the thick door that it made me jump. As soon as the door clicked from the inside, the security guard hurried to his post and left me alone. The door opened and an elderly maid stood at the post. Her smile was kind yet full of pain. âGood morning, I am Sister Yasmin. I came to see Mrs. West.â She nodded wordlessly and ushered me in. The home was beautifully furnished: chandeliers hung from the ceilings like crystals, the marble tiles were polished so thoroughly that I could see my face in them. And that smell⌠what was cooking? My mouth watered; I hadnât had anything to eat all day. Fasting till evening was part of my penance, followed by ten âHail Maryâsâ and ten âLordâs Prayerâ before I could eat anything. âMrs. West is in here,â the maid said weakly, ushering me into an upstairs room with the lights dimmed and an elderly lady laying in bed with a kind smile, knitting pins and what looked like a blanket. âThank you, Janet,â she said with a smile and Janet left. I was alone with her. She patted an empty chair that was at her bedside and I moved to sit. Her face was pale, her hair, wiry and white yet the aura of death loomed over her like a haze but she kept the smile on her face wide and bright, knitting happily like it was just a casual Tuesday. âWhat is your name, dear?â She asked as I sat down and took out my rosary. My heart paused for a moment as I looked into her kind face and deep blue eyes. Her voice was so soft and warm. It felt almost⌠angelic. âY-Yasmine. Yasmine Kavari. Should we start with the rosary?â I asked innocently, my hands trembling, still thinking of her ethereal voice. âYasmine KavariâŚâ She tested my name on her tongue and it sounded like it was spoken by the angel Gabriel. I could only imagine how Maryâs name sounded on his blessed tongue. â...It has a lovely ring to it. It is a beautiful name.â My heart skipped a beat and my body felt tingly all over. A smile curled my lips and my face lit up with delight. I had heard kind words before. My fatherâs love was not only tough but tender too, just like our Lordâs. âLet us start with the Rosary.â My fingers massaging a pearly bead but Mrs. West placed her frail, pale hand on mine, wrapped up in bandages that barely allowed any movement for my fingers. Those eyes caught me again and I felt a lump form in my throat as I was pulled into their enchanting gaze. âNo need, dear. I doubt I will live long enough to receive the rites.â âNo! I⌠I can get a priest. He can... He can come and pray for you immediately!â I tried to stand up but her hands wrapped around my wrists tenderly and pulled me back into my seat. âNo need, child. There is not enough time. I just wanted to talk. Not about the Bible or anything like that, just a harmless discussion until I transcend this world. Please⌠stay.â I had only just met this angelic lady and she could die any minute and all she wanted was to talk⌠to me. My heart cracked and chipped. God called his saints home with death but this lady⌠I had barely met her and yet, I didnât want her to leave, I didnât want her to be called home. Why didnât I meet her earlier? âCan you knit dear?â she asked and I gave a small nod. âLovely. Find Janet and ask her to give you another pair of pins and wool.â I hurried out of her room and searched for Janet. Each second that I didnât find her filled me with dread⌠dread that I would return to the room and she wouldnât be alive anymore, that she would be cold and lifeless, unable to speak to me. Where was Janet⌠âOuch!â I bumped into something hard and reeled backwards, closing my eyes and rubbing my nose in pain. âWho are you and what are you doing here?â a deep, rumbling voice bellowed and I felt my body freeze in place. My heart started and stopped and my eyes⌠I dared not open them. My hair stood on end and my breathing was caught in my throat feeling the dark aura around me, suffocating me. âI will ask for the last time. Who. Are. You? And look at me when I am talking to you?â My eyes opened immediately and a gasp escaped my lips as I met a pair of dark blue eyes, on a stern, chiselled face, glaring at me with an icy coldness. âI⌠I am Sister Yasmin,â I whimpered, unable to pull away from this tall, handsome manâs cold gaze. His eyes looked me over, slowly, and I felt my cheeks redden and burn. I was dressed in my habit yet it felt like his stare could penetrate through all my layers. My lips parted for me to breathe. Never before had I felt so open, so exposed⌠so⌠seen. I was here for Mrs. West but yet, I could barely breathe when he looked at me. âWell, Sister Yasminââ I shuddered as he tested my name with his rumbling voice. No one had ever said it the way he did. My name that I had known my whole life, my identity felt foreign to me in his presence, on his tongue. It was like a name I had never received but would be happy to be called by as long as it came from him. ââYou stepped on me. Fix it.â âY-yes Sir. Forgive me, Sir.â Almost immediately, I scrambled to my knees and dusted the tiny foot print my shoes left on his thick, leathery boots. My hands were on the cold floor but I didnât mind. I would do anything to avoid this manâs wrath, anything to please him. âLook at me,â he whispered and my attention was pulled upward and gripped by those icy blue eyes of his. His hair was silvery and sleek. He was very tall and muscular; my nose only touched his chest when I bumped into him. He was like no one had ever seen. My lips were parted to help me breathe and his eyes never left me as he searched his pocket. A ring of keys clattered to the floor beside me and I rushed to pick them up and hand them to him, gazing back at his tall and muscular frame in fear and awe. âHere you go, Sir.â âThank you,â he whispered softly and placed a soft finger under my chin. âSuch a good girl. Now, on your feet.â I did so, following the pace of his finger on my chin as it guided me to stand upright. My stomach clenched and squirmed. Good girl⌠the words in my head made me squirm and sent shudders down my spine. I had never been called that by anyone but I did know this: I wanted to hear it again⌠from him. âWhat are you looking for?â he asked, his arms back to his side but his gaze still cold and firm. I took deep breaths, trying my best to will my trembling lips to speak. âM-Mrs. West asked⌠asked me to find Janet. I-I-I think she needs⌠uhmm⌠wool and⌠pins.â My mouth clamped shut and I stood there breathless, waiting for a reply that seemed to take an eternity. Without warning, he grabbed my wrist and pulled me along. I followed him willingly, without struggle, my legs struggling to meet up with his strides. Soon we stopped in front of a glass cabinet, stocked with wool and pins. I had never seen so many in one place. The handsome man opened it and pulled out three large yarn and a pair of knitting pins. He carried them, his muscular arms bulging as he held them firmly and walked to Mrs. Westâs room with me tagging behind. âGrandmother,â he said with a gentle knock on the door as he pushed it open. âYou asked for yarn?â Mrs. West, thankfully, was still alive and still had her angelic smile but her gentle aura now clashed with the dark and imposing aura of this man⌠Wait a second! Grandmother?! âThere you are, Jacob. I was wondering if Yasmin was lost. Thankfully she found you.â Mrs. West smiled and set her pins down on her lap. âYasmin, I guess you have met Jacob West, my grandsonâŚâYasmin: My jaw hung loosely, my eyes darted back and forth between angelic Mrs. West and this⌠man that she claimed to be her grandson. He walked over to her and handed her the pins and yarn while I still battled with the reality of it all. âYasmin, dear, do come and have a seat.â My heart jumped into my throat at the sound of her soft voice while her grandson stood next to her, glaring at me with those stormy blue eyes. âY-Yes, Maâam.â I hurried and took up the seat next to her and she handed me the yarn. My hands trembled as I made the loop, my eyes fixed on the crimson yarn but my body could feel his gaze. I couldnât resist and stole a side glance and immediately regretted it. Why was he looking at me like that? Did I do something wrong? Was my habit dirty? Thoughts whizzed by and my thighs clenched hard as a rush filled my insides. Why did I react to him like this? âYasmin, how about you tell us about yourself,â Mrs. West suggested cheerily. My stomach churned. I fought t
Yasmin: My sunken eyes stared back at me as I looked at myself in the bathroom mirror. Sunday morning and the challenge it came with came faster than I wanted it to. The plastic bags and elastic bands lay on the table, staring at me, waiting for me to do the needful. A sigh escaped my lips and my sunken green eyes stared back at me from the mirror, tired but encouraging me to do the necessary. Slowly I unwrapped the bandages on my hands, wincing and whimpering as the soft material bruised and stung my tender, peeling skin. My hands didnât even look like mine anymore: pink patches of tender exposed skin and blisters covered my hands. I tested my fingers and instantly regretted it, as a blister popped open and began to ooze and bleed anew and all I could do was stand there and watch my crimson blood drip into the sink. Quickly, I wrapped it back up, powering through the pain and wrapping it all again in the plastic bags and bands so that I could shower. Just as I was about to take
Yasmin: Tears streamed down my face as I staggered up the stairs. My finger gripped my tummy and low groans rumbled in my throat. It was over. It was finally over. Twenty-one days of no food and water was finally over and I felt like I walked on the thin line between life and death. Dad said that fasting made you stronger, drew you closer to the Lord but I felt weaker than water and close to the Lord⌠Yes, I was. On the verge of death, close to meeting Him. It would have been bearable if I didn't get my period yesterday. Bleeding and hungry, my womb and stomach were out to get me. There was never a combination so terrible. My fingers ran on the cold stone walls of the convent as I willed myself to the dining room. Every stone step moved under my feet, each breath was a task. Arghhh⌠the pain was getting worse. My insides were pulling themselves apart. Lord, why?! I stopped; my legs shook under me. I took a deep breath and that's when I smelled it. Cinnamon rolls! And was that⌠m
Yasmin: My breath got caught in my throat. My fingers curled and uncurled as anxiety seized my body, making everything stop. âI⌠Iâm sorry. I got⌠I got my period and I was really hungry and I didnâtâŚâ âAnd you didnât wait for the other sisters,â he cut in, glaring at me, his hands shaking at his side. âI have raised you in this place since the day you were born. You are twenty-one and you have been getting your period for the past eight years. You should be used to this! You should be stronger!â âI tried.ââ My composure shattered and hot tears streamed down my face. âI tried my best, Dad. I was in so much pain. I really tried.â His breathing was deep and heavy, his stare was unblinking and a glint flashed in his emerald eyes. âYou allowed the devil to mislead you. You listened to the desires of your flesh and that was why you ate. There is nothing more to it.â He took a deep breath and exhaled sharply through his mouth. His voice dropped and made my breath catch. âBring me
Yasmin: My sunken eyes stared back at me as I looked at myself in the bathroom mirror. Sunday morning and the challenge it came with came faster than I wanted it to. The plastic bags and elastic bands lay on the table, staring at me, waiting for me to do the needful. A sigh escaped my lips and my sunken green eyes stared back at me from the mirror, tired but encouraging me to do the necessary. Slowly I unwrapped the bandages on my hands, wincing and whimpering as the soft material bruised and stung my tender, peeling skin. My hands didnât even look like mine anymore: pink patches of tender exposed skin and blisters covered my hands. I tested my fingers and instantly regretted it, as a blister popped open and began to ooze and bleed anew and all I could do was stand there and watch my crimson blood drip into the sink. Quickly, I wrapped it back up, powering through the pain and wrapping it all again in the plastic bags and bands so that I could shower. Just as I was about to take
Yasmin: My jaw hung loosely, my eyes darted back and forth between angelic Mrs. West and this⌠man that she claimed to be her grandson. He walked over to her and handed her the pins and yarn while I still battled with the reality of it all. âYasmin, dear, do come and have a seat.â My heart jumped into my throat at the sound of her soft voice while her grandson stood next to her, glaring at me with those stormy blue eyes. âY-Yes, Maâam.â I hurried and took up the seat next to her and she handed me the yarn. My hands trembled as I made the loop, my eyes fixed on the crimson yarn but my body could feel his gaze. I couldnât resist and stole a side glance and immediately regretted it. Why was he looking at me like that? Did I do something wrong? Was my habit dirty? Thoughts whizzed by and my thighs clenched hard as a rush filled my insides. Why did I react to him like this? âYasmin, how about you tell us about yourself,â Mrs. West suggested cheerily. My stomach churned. I fought t
Yasmin: This was it: 4th Grace Avenue. My heart skipped a beat and I nearly fell backwards trying to take in the tall and grand building. I did the sign of the cross on my chest and kissed my rosary. The priest had always warned us about the rich as well as places like this: havens for sin and evil, people tied to their wealth and their money, futile, buys them a spot in hell. The security guard let me in and led me to the front door. I gulped and looked at him. âWhat?â he snapped and I showed him my bandaged hands. His stiff face reddened slightly and his fist knocked heavily on the thick door that it made me jump. As soon as the door clicked from the inside, the security guard hurried to his post and left me alone. The door opened and an elderly maid stood at the post. Her smile was kind yet full of pain. âGood morning, I am Sister Yasmin. I came to see Mrs. West.â She nodded wordlessly and ushered me in. The home was beautifully furnished: chandeliers hung from the ceilings li
Yasmin: My breath got caught in my throat. My fingers curled and uncurled as anxiety seized my body, making everything stop. âI⌠Iâm sorry. I got⌠I got my period and I was really hungry and I didnâtâŚâ âAnd you didnât wait for the other sisters,â he cut in, glaring at me, his hands shaking at his side. âI have raised you in this place since the day you were born. You are twenty-one and you have been getting your period for the past eight years. You should be used to this! You should be stronger!â âI tried.ââ My composure shattered and hot tears streamed down my face. âI tried my best, Dad. I was in so much pain. I really tried.â His breathing was deep and heavy, his stare was unblinking and a glint flashed in his emerald eyes. âYou allowed the devil to mislead you. You listened to the desires of your flesh and that was why you ate. There is nothing more to it.â He took a deep breath and exhaled sharply through his mouth. His voice dropped and made my breath catch. âBring me
Yasmin: Tears streamed down my face as I staggered up the stairs. My finger gripped my tummy and low groans rumbled in my throat. It was over. It was finally over. Twenty-one days of no food and water was finally over and I felt like I walked on the thin line between life and death. Dad said that fasting made you stronger, drew you closer to the Lord but I felt weaker than water and close to the Lord⌠Yes, I was. On the verge of death, close to meeting Him. It would have been bearable if I didn't get my period yesterday. Bleeding and hungry, my womb and stomach were out to get me. There was never a combination so terrible. My fingers ran on the cold stone walls of the convent as I willed myself to the dining room. Every stone step moved under my feet, each breath was a task. Arghhh⌠the pain was getting worse. My insides were pulling themselves apart. Lord, why?! I stopped; my legs shook under me. I took a deep breath and that's when I smelled it. Cinnamon rolls! And was that⌠m