This flashback phase has roughly 3 chapters left now. To be honest, I never thought it would take up 20+ chapters. I even cut a lot of things out of the flashback which I saved and created to show their bonding. The only purpose of this flashback was to show the connection and depth of their relationship and why they never really opposed marrying each other. I have cut a lot of incidents out and thanks for your feedback telling me to fasten the process.
SamuelI'm sorry for letting my insecurity question you. I'm sorry for being the overthinker to always fearing that you would find someone better than me.I'm sorry for being jealous of every person you look at the way you look at me. That's all I want to tell her. But I can't.On her balcony, she's sitting on the swing beside me, with her legs crossed and her head on my shoulder. "You okay?" she asks me, pressing her chin against my shoulder. "Yeah", I whisper."You haven't uttered a single word for an hour now", she tells me."Don't you like the way you enjoy the silence together?" I look at the sky, covered with millions of twinkling stars. "Sometimes silence feels good when conversations become vague and weird""Why do you feel like our conversation became vague?" her voice is filled with surprise.Because you're lying to me, firefly. And I don't know why God makes me see it. I wish I never got to know you were lying about certain things. I would love to stay in delusions as I
Chrisanna"WHERE'S MY DRESS?" my scream echoes around the entire villa. "Where's my damn dress, mama!""Ivanna isn't home, sweetie. Hear me out", Fifi says as I have already made a mess all over the room. I'm running out of time. When I came back from the salon, my dress wasn't there. I clearly remember that I left it on the bed. "Your dress accidentally got dirty", Fifi says, making me almost jump out as I surge towards her."What?""Yeah. Lesley came for mopping. She accidentally dropped the cleaning solution onto it. I sent it immediately to the laundry so it doesn't get ruined"No!Heck!No!I feel like dying already because I hunted the dress down after storming into four different malls. It was so perfect just how Samuel might have wanted it. All my excitement and happiness fade away. "Chrissie!" Fifi holds my shoulder. "Sweetie, don't get upset. You have plenty of dresses. You'll look like a princess anything you wear"I slump onto the bed, mumbling. "Samuel would love the g
SamuelChrisanna is fast asleep when I come to the balcony to suck in the fresh air. She asked me what she did wrong. And I told her she didn't do anything wrong. It's me. I'm the problem and it was altogether my fault. Teenagers are stupid.Teenagers with messed up childhood are the problem.That day, I left, not because I thought she was betraying me, not because Dad's words had pushed me to think worse about her. I left because I was scared of how my subconscious started to question her. I was scared to hurt her for the person I was slowly turning into. An insecure one. She didn't deserve that person. The problematic one. All these years, I was blaming her because it seemed to be easy to live with it. But deep down, I knew I blamed myself all the way and never thought I was worthy of her. Every day. Every night. I thought about her.She was never out of my head. Never once. I would hear her voice in the background when I would talk to Uncle Scott. I would see his pictures on h
Chrisanna"Her name's Charlotte", Eric says, showing me the picture on his phone. "She's—""Hot, right?" he grins as I throw him a you-are-impossible look. "Kidding. She's lovely, beautiful, smart, and sweet. And British! Lord""I knew you always had a thing for British men. Now, it's British women too?" I say, swiping to the next picture where she's sitting on his lap, wrapping her arms around his neck.They look happy. "I got to know that after I met Charlotte", he leans back to the headboard as we are seated on my bed. He had a smile on his face the whole time when he was talking about her. It was really rare."How long have you been dating her?""A month almost", he says. My eyes enlarge. "Holy moly, himbo. A month? A whole month? This is the fucking longest relationship you have ever been""I didn't realize that though", he rolls his eyes. Eric has always been facing all the dating issues. Especially with women. They basically didn't like the fact that he is bi. And with men
SamuelMy forehead stays pressed against the wall as the freezing water descends on my body. I don't exactly remember how long I have been inside but I never felt this worse before. I'm angry.I'm ashamed.I feel guilty. Even though all this time, I knew Chrisanna never did anything wrong, I still blame myself for that only moment when I had such the worst thoughts about her and Eric. The last ten days I spent in insecurity before the prom and on the prom night. I can't believe I doubted their relationship even for a second. I hated myself already. Now, I hate myself more. Even today, when I walked inside and saw her being so happy around Eric, my nerves wrenched again, although I have no grudge against Eric either. I never had. I never had this anger on him that I used to have on any other guy who would be close to her. It just made me feel bad about myself that Chrisanna could never breathe in relief around me. Even now. I can sense how careful she is to talk to me. She choo
ChrisannaHis grey orbs tremble with my words, unsure if he heard me right, and I'm wondering if I heard myself right. "Please!" my whisper melts into my mouth as he takes my brims into a passionate kiss again, this time hungrily nibbling them. I slip my hand underneath his shirt through the slit of the first opened button. His hand moves to the back of my head as he clicks the bun open, letting my hair wave down and fisting them to pull me closer. His right arm wrapped around my waist, pressing me against his hard torso, and his left hand fisting my hair to press my mouth against his. I don't move but it already feels like I'll not be able to move any of the parts of my body as he holds me like he doesn't wanna let me go ever again. I can barely breathe. My chest can barely rise due to being pressed against him. And his mouth captures my lips, my nostrils getting blocked by his nose bridge pressed against it. He's definitely gonna kill me breathless today. But a part of me does
Chrisanna"Samuel", I whisper, lying on my stomach and feeling the weight of half of his body on my back. His head is placed on my shoulder and he has his tough protective arms wrapping around me. "Yes, firefly", he softly whispers, kissing my skin and sending a jolt of shiver down my spine as I clutch the bed sheet tightly, my eyes closing shut, a smile rippling on my face. We just made love and the feeling is still fresh and raw, yet the sweet kiss makes me blush even harder. "Samuel", I call him again. "Yes, my little wife", a whiff of mischievousness and affection dripping from his voice."I love you", I say in a heartbeat. His hand stops moving on my skin as his grip stiffens. He's silent and I'm glad I didn't say it looking into his eyes. "You don't have to say it back right now", I keep the smile on. "Because I know you love me. And it's fine if you don't wanna say it back anytime soon or ever. It doesn't matter if you say it or not. Once you said, I deserve actions, no
ChrisannaEmmy sets the laptop aside, exhaling deeply. "I don't think I ever can"She looks at me with a smile. Heartbreaking smile. "Why?" I drag myself close to her and place my hand on hers. "He needs to have clarity, Emmy. He has so many misunderstandings—""But my boy is away from the biggest trauma of his life", her voice breaks and her eyes shiver at me. "I can't do this to him, Chrissie. I know he's different. Isolated. Filled with pain. And I have been trying my best to keep him away from this pain. The hatred he might have for the things I have done— well, the false things his father might have said to him about me— I can bear that. But not the trauma he will go through all over again. He's surely a grown-up man now. But trust me, he's still a little kid inside""I know", I mumble, looking away. "I know that"Her lips curve into a little smile. "I'm so lucky that he loves me. He might be angry with me. But it's a miracle that he didn't end up being a man filled with hatred.