Morris."That's all, boss. All good.""Keep in touch, Bleu. Be discreet." My jaw tightened as I ended the call. I wiped my sweat and took off my top.Maaga akong nagigising at ginagawa ang bawat gawain dito. At sa ngayon na hindi na ako lumalapit masyado kay Brielle ay inutusan ko si Bleu na lihim siyang bantayan.I can't help myself. I care a lot about her, but I don't want to get used to it. She needs to move on without me all the time. My life here on the Island is temporary, and sooner or later, I will settle back in Italy.Ininom ko ang maligamgam na tubig at saka tahimik na pinagmasdan ang pag-litaw ng araw.Everything around here is beautiful. I find my solace in this place, and I'm completely different from the other person here.I'm ruthless as hell without a heart. But living here, on this Island, I learned a lot. I opened my heart and discovered one thing. Infatuation and love.Dammit. This fucking insane. I tried to deny these feelings, but the hell. I can overcome this.
Brielle.Tumaas na naman ang leeg ko habang nakatingin sa daan. Nagbabasakali na si Morris ang makikita ko ngayon, pero hindi, dahil ang nakangising mukha ni Diezel ito.I pouted in dismay as I looked at Diezel seriously. I raised my brow as I surveyed his body. He did not notice me. He was serious, too, talking with someone using his mobile. He paused a few meters from our sari-sari store with grumpiness. I pouted as I observed him, and instantly, my eyes widened a fraction after realizing that even Diezel himself was not a typical person to begin with.Ngayon ko lang ba napansin ito? Ba't hindi ko nakita ito noon sa kanya?Diezel has the same height as Morris. Body build? Morris is hot and wholesome, of course, but there's something different from Diezel... it's the way he stands in a precise manner that is inevitable.Kung tattoo lang ang pag-uusapan ay marami si Morris kumpara sa kanya. Malinis pa nga ang mukha at leeg ni Diezel at konti lang ang tattoo sa braso at kamay niya. Ma
Morris.Tapos na ang rehersal, at lumayo ako agad sa karamihan. Dumaan ako sa likod ng stage at mabilis na naglaho. Alam kong maraming mata ang nakatingin sa akin. Kasama na ang baliw na Diezel sa unahan. Sumenyas siya, at nang marating ko ang lagusan ay ang kotse ko agad ang tumambad sa akin. Pumasok ako, at hinintay lang si Brielle. Alam kong alam niya na nandito na ang sasakyan.And I was right, straight away, the passenger door open and Brielle got inside."Did you miss me?" I licked my lower lip, staring at hers. I miss her. I can't deny that."Huh, e-miss mo mukha mo!" Pinaikot niya ang mga mata at saka nag-seatbelt na."I'm hungry. What about you?" I asked and started the ignition."Me too. Dating gawi?""Okay, baby. Hold on tight, and we will get there in no time," I winked as I stepped into the accelerator.I could have stayed. The organizer wants me to stay, but I choose not to. I told them that I could only be there for a few hours. I can't stay long because I have other w
Brielle.Mahihiya pa ba ako? Hindi na. Sanay na ako sa tuksuan at galawan dahil sa trabaho ko noon. Pero hindi ko kailanman naramdaman ang ganito.This is the first time I've felt so weird inside. I know myself. I like Morris, but I don't know how much I like him now.Alam kong magagalit lang si tiya, pero ayaw kong pagsisihan ito. Matanda na ako. Bente syete na. Malala pa yata ang ginagawa ko noon sa mga lalaking nasa loob ng misyon ko. Kailangan ko silang akitin, para makapasok sila sa kampo.I never kill them, but I use myself as bait. That was me. That was my way of living.I thought I could divert my likes to Ismael, but I was wrong. I just realized that I was really into Morris without protecting my heart."Don't fucking joke, Bree. You don't know what you are asking, baby." He chuckled. He shook his head and moved back to our table.Parang sampal sa mukha ko ang sagot niya at napalunok na ako.Noon, sa tuwing hinihindian ako nga mga lalaki na nasa misyon ko ay hindi naman ako
Morris.With an effing snap of lust and desire. I decided to keep my distance. But the hell, she likes me? Fucking real.After that overnight, I've thought a lot, and I've come to the crucial conclusion that I should give her the choice that she likes.I can't promise her anything, but I can try. I will be me. That's for sure.Siguro ito na ang pagkakataon na makilala ako ni Brielle ng buo at totoo sa sarili. Marami siyang bagay na hindi alam sa akin. Iba ako, at siguro ang kabutin ko lang ang nagustuhan niya sa akin. Maliban d'on ay wala na. Sigurado ako.We're done with everything, and everything is on the yacht. I called Bleu earlier. He is together with Diezel. I instructed them to take all the groceries and items that Brielle and I purchased today. I asked them to assist Nanay while Brielle was with me. I also phoned Nanay to let her know that Brielle and I might stay overnight in town, and she was fine with that."Hindi tayo uuwi? Si Diezel ang pinabalik mo sa yate mo? Tutulong
Brielle.Kahihiyan? Wala ako n'yan. Mas gustohin ko pa na sabihin ang totoong nararamdaman ko sa isang tao kaysa naman pagsisihan ko ito.Life is too short. You either do it or you don't. And I want the opposite because I prefer not to have regrets.Lumabas si Morris at pinunasan ko agad ang luha sa mga mata ko. Inayos kong mabilisan ang sarili at saka natawa akong bahagya.Ang baliw ko talaga. Hindi naman siguro siya natakot ako? Ako pa nga ang natakot dahil kakaiba siya sa nakasanayan ko.I like how he is now, rather than the dormant, timid Morris that I know. I've noticed that his personality has changed, and I don't mind it."Let's go out for a walk." Inilahad niya ang kamay nang makalabas ako, at napatingin ako rito."Are you feeling okay?" Napaigting siya at seryoso pa rin ang mga mata sa akin."Oo naman. . ." Hinawakan ko na ang kamay niya at sabay kaming bumaba.Imbes na elevator ay sa fire exit part kami dumaan ni Morris.Tahimik kaming pareho na parang pinapakiramdaman lang
Morris.I will no longer hold it. I'll embrace everything she offers. I don't care. One thing is for sure tonight. We want to be with each other."Bree, what do you want me to do, baby?" With a soft, thick, tender caress, I cupped her face in a delicate way that I knew and gently kissed her moist lips. She smells so good and tastes beautiful. I've kissed a lot of girls before, but Brielle's lips and kisses are deep and passionate. It weakens me to a state of madness."Morris…" Dumapo ang kamay niya sa ilalim ng damit ko at mabilisang hinubad ang t-shirt ko."Slow down, baby," I said in between our kisses, and my breathing ragged."I-I can't, Morris. . . I'm so hot." Ulit na halik niya sa labi ko at sabik siya sa lahat ng galaw ng katawan namin.I scoop her body, and her legs wrap against my waist. I smiled as we kissed, and as I bit her lower lip, a pulsating pulse of her hips made me rock harder.Her body slammed into the mattress, and she quickly sat in front of me in a kneeling po
Brielle.Nakakapagod. Balot sa pawis ang boung katawan ko at hindi ko alam kung nasaan ako ngayon. Ramdam ko ang sakit sa paa at balot ito ng dugo at putik. Mabilis kong pinunasan ang luha at saka matapang na inayos ang damit ko.Tapos na akong umiyak, at ubos na yata ang luha ko. At kahit pa iiyak ako ng dugo ay hindi maawa sa akin ang mga iyon. Mga hayop sila! Wala silang awa!Hindi ko naramdaman na pumutak ang katiting na luha sa pisngi at mabilis kong pinunasan ito. Kinagata ko ang labi at namuo ang galit sa loob ko.Babalikan ko si tiya. Babalikan ko siya.***"Bree, baby. . ." Ang mainit na dampi na halik ni Morris sa tainga ko ang nagpamulat ng mga mata ko ngayon. Nanaginip na naman ako, pero iba ito at hindi kagaya nang mga nakaraang panaginip ko.Humikab ako at ramdam ko ang konting kirot sa hita. Napa-ungol ako nang maramdaman ko ang kamay ni Morris sa bahaging ito."I'm sorry, I made you tired, baby, and I know you want to sleep more. But we have to go." He rested his face
New BeginningAnastacia.Note: This is seven years later. The twins are now six years old.Binalot ko ang makapal na jacket sa katawan. Tumigil na ang ulan. Kailangan kong umakyat sa bubong kahit na hindi mabuti ang pakiramdam ko. Wala kong choice at kailangan ko ng gawin ito. Baka kasi mamaya ulit ay uulan na naman. Mas mabuting maagapan ko na ngayon.I need to climb up the roof to check the leak. The rainwater drips in Zev's bedroom. It's not that bad, but it really annoys me every time I hear the drip sound inside his room. It sounds frustrating, and my poor boy can't even complain. It hurts to the bones to see my children struggle along with me.Hindi man nila sinasabi sa akin ito, ay ramdam ko ito bilang isang ina. Naiinis ako at galit ako sa kung ano man ang sitwasyon meron ako ngayon. Wala akong ibang masisisi kung 'di ang sarili mismo."Mama? Aakyat ka?" Celestine Skye looked innocently at me, my sweet, beautiful baby."Yes, Skye. Get back inside. You will get wet, anak."Kin
Anastacia.Mama accepted it without knowing the entire truth about my secret. Only Tessie knows everything, and she promised me that she would never tell anyone about it.Bumalik na si Mama sa probinsya. Marami siyang ginawa para mapagaan ang lahat sa akin dito sa loob ng bahay. Babalik siya sa kabuwanan ko, at mananatili ng iilang linggo.May isang anak si Mama sa bago niya, pero malaki na ito. Nasa high school na si Neri. Mabait na bata at magalang. Malapit siya sa ama niya at nakakaingit ang closeness nila.I have no memories of my father. He left us when I was only five years old. Mama and he were never married. Since then, I haven’t seen him. The last I heard, he was doing well and living in Baguio with his five kids."Okay ka lang ba, Anastacia?"“Oo, okay lang.”Abala kaming pareho ni Kagawad Camilla. Siya ang kasama ko ngayon sa convention ng lungsod. Nasa Cagayan de Oro kami, at dalawang araw kaming mananatili rito dahil sa convention. Parte ito ng bagong proyekto na iniluns
Anastacia."Ano? Dalawang buwan!? Anong klaseng lalaki ba siya? Hindi pwede 'to, Anastacia! Babalik tayo doon. Kakalbuhin ko ang lalaking 'yon!""Ang galing naman niya! Pagkatapos siyang magpakasarap sa 'yo ay ganun na lang ba? Wala lang sa kanya ang lahat? Anong klaseng lalaki ba siya!? Pesti! Halika! Babalik tayo! Bilis!"Hinila niya ang paa ko at pinadyakan ko siya. Bumitaw siya at mabilis kong binalot ang kumot sa katawan. Umiiyak ako. Hindi hihinto ang luha sa mga mata ko dahil nasasaktan ako ngayon. Pinipilit kong magpakatatag, pero bakit ang hirap? Sinusubok ako ng tadhana at pakiramdam ko ay wala na akong pag asa sa lahat.I have no work, and I'm running out of money. What will I do next?"Anastacia…"Ramdam ko ang pag upo ni Tessie sa paanan. Minasahe niya ang paa ko, at tahimik siyang nakikinig sa hikbi ko.Promise, huli na ito. Bukas at sa mga susunod na araw ay ayaw ko ng umiyak. Nakakapagod umiyak. Nakakawalang gana sa buhay. Pero ganito naman talaga 'di ba? Kasalanan ko
Diezel.My eyebrow raised while listening to John. He's got less than twenty seconds before he fuck up. How the hell will he bring an investor to this project if he can't deliver his report properly? He can't even justify some of this. I'm not listening to him while I read his report. It's full of nonsense."Next!""B-But, Sir. I'm not yet done.""You're fired. Next!" I blurted out, fixing them with a hawk-like stare. When I locked eyes with them, they all averted their gaze."Damn it! Wala bang maayos na proposal sa inyong lahat? These reports are all boring! How will you bring a golden egg to the table if all your proposals are as boring and useless as shit!Tumayo ako at saka napabuntonghininga sa sarili. I need some air, or I could end up dismissing the entire team.Lumapit si Joel sa akin at bumulong."Your secretary is on the line. It's important, she said."I rolled my tongue, and Joel handed me the phone."Yes, Sharon?" I raised my eyebrows. "I'm not in a good mood already, S
Anastacia.Bago na ang lahat. Pinalitan niya ang lahat ng staff rito at hindi ko na kilala ang mga ito. Kahit pa ang gwardiya ng gusali ay bago.What the heck? Talaga bang ginawa niya ito dahil ayaw na niya akong makitang muli?Shit.Hindi ko na tuloy alam kung tama pa ba itong ginagawa ko ngayon. Nanginig tuloy ang tuhod ko, at peke akong ngumiti sa babae rito sa front desk. Nasa likod ko naman si Tessie."Yes, Ma'am. How can I help you?" She smiled, but it was obviously a fake smile. She looked at me from head to toe and back again."Uhm, I would like to see Mr. Dennis Ezequil Mondragon?" Kumurap kurap ako. Nilakasan ko na ang loob."Oh? Do you happen to have an appointment with him, Ma'am?""A-Appointment? Wala, Miss."Nawala ang ngiti ko. Inaasahan ko na ito. Kilala ko si Diezel, at kahit noon pa ay hindi siya basta-basta tumatangap ng bisita.Ang buong akala ko ay nandito pa sina Kimmy at Dora. Pero wala na. Ano kaya ang nangyari sa kanila? Nilipat din ba sila ni Diezel?"Sorry
Anastacia."Ano!? Buntis ka? At dalawa pa talaga? Shit!"Parang putok ang boses ni Tessie sa tainga ko. Sinabi ko na sa kanya. Wala akong ibang mapagsasabihan at siya lang din."At ano ang plano mo, aber?"Namaywang siya at seryoso akong tinitigan. Umiwas ako at nagpabalik-balik ang lakad ko sa harapan niya."Hindi ko alam. Nalilito ako, Tessie." Kinagat ko na ang pang-ibabang labi."No, Anastacia. I know what you're thinking. Hindi puwede 'to! Kailangan mong sabihin sa kanya! Sasabihin mo at sasamahan kita!"I paused and inhaled deeply."Paano kung ayaw niya? Paano kung ipagtabuyan niya ako, Tessie?"Takot ako, at hindi ako handa kung sakaling magkikita kami ulit. Hindi na kailanman sumagi sa isip ko na makipagkita sa kanya.After he abandoned me, I erased his existence. I hated him so much! I want to forget him. At kung kailan ay okay na ako at handa na ang puso kong makalimot sa lahat, ay saka naman dumating ang problemang ito.Talagang hindi ko na makakalimutan si Diezel dahil bu
Diezel.What are the odds? I'm so effing bored. I raked my hair in exasperation, feeling so frustrated.I'm back here in the business after Italy. I went to Italy to forget Anastacia, but damn it. I couldn't get over with her. I couldn't forget her. Every time I shut my eyes I always see her face, crying, pleading and I feel effing guilty about it.Kung hindi ako pinigilan ni Joel ng gabing iyon, ay tiyak kasama ko na si Anastacia ngayon.I was determined to leave because it was the right thing to do, even if my heart said no. I hesitated and briefly considered going back to Anastacia, but Joel stopped me. He told me there was no hope for me and Anastacia. If I chose her, it would only complicate everything.Damn him! Damn them!They think my life is a game, right? Eff them all.Yes, I have set my goals. I want to build a perfect family with an Italian heritage. That's the ideal gift I could give to my mother and to the whole clan. The Elders are hoping that I will produce an Italian
Anastacia.I was crying the entire time I was inside my bedroom. After he dropped me off yesterday morning, I never went out. I have no work anymore. I've finished all my work at Diezel's company, and I have no plans to look for other work at the moment. Ang buong akala ko pagkatapos ng masasarap na gabi namin ay iisa na kami. Nagkamali ako, dahil heto umiiyak ako ng wala sa sarili.I was hoping that he would come back. I never went to bed last night. I was waiting for him the entire time. My cell phone was not even turned off. I was waiting for Diezel to call me, but it never happened.Siguro nalilito siya at nag iisip? Iyan lang ang iniisip ko, na baka hindi siya nakatawag agad dahil nag iisip pa siya. Pero mukhang wala na yata, dahil dalawang araw na ngayon simula nang huli ko siyang nakita, at wala pa rin akong balita sa kanya.The two days have suddenly passed into seven days, and still, Diezel has not even contacted me.Mataas ang pride ko, pero sobra na ito. Ganun na lang ba
Anastacia.Naimulat ko ang mga mata at wala na si Diezel sa tabi ko. Bahagyang nakabukas ang bintana. Maliwanag na, pero maaga pa naman. Humikab ako at saka napangiti nang maalala ang ginawa namin. Nakakataba ng puso iyon, dahil ramdam ko na mahal ako ni Diezel sa kabila ng lahat. Gusto niya ako!Tumayo ako para hanapin siya. Lumabas ako ng kwarto niya at bumaba ng hagdanan."Diezel?" I called him, and my eyes surveyed his place as I descended the stairs.This place is massive. This is one of Diezel's place in town. "I'm here, Anastacia." He calls back.Binilisan ko ang hakbang. Nasa kabilang banda siya, sa baba, sa mismong opisina niya.Ang bahay na ito ni Diezel ay malapit lang sa opisina ng kompanya. Madalas na ako rito dahil na rin sa trabaho. Alam ko na ang lahat sa kanya, at pinagkakatiwalaan niya ako sa lahat ng bagay.Nakabukas nga naman ang pinto ng opisina niya rito, at nakaupo siya nang pumasok ako. Parang tinatapos lang ang ginagawa."Nagtatrabaho ka?" Nangunot ang noo