LOGINShare
Is This Really “It”?
Last Updated:
2021-07-12 11:07:57Related chapters
Cranberry Playlist Epilogue
We now jump into the now, I just remembered having set up a blog from a while ago. I started working on it again when I found an old comment for one of my old playlists.It made things worse realizing that the same “A” who suggested the song for my playlist was Audrey. My Audrey. The woman who gave me everything and used to love me.Shortly after that, I pulled up Facebook only to find a shocker. A clip of Audrey. Out and about. But she’s with someone else. They were having breakfast. And you can go on guessing as to who she was with. I also found out about other things that I would no longer would want to write about seeing as it’s f*cking tearing me down to pieces just thinking about it. Thinking maybe they were just stories made up. I still think that she wouldn’t do me like that.In spite of how long it’s been, I constantly have to remind myself that she’s no longer coming home. And that I May never get to see her again in this lifetime.Going back to the first time I
Last Updated : 2021-07-12Cranberry Playlist About the Author
About the AuthorJong Snow is a part-time content creator and a full-time employee. While he does not have relative experience in writing a book, his goal is to share stories that people could possibly relate to. The first novel he finished was a project he decided to work on during a very difficult time in his life.
Last Updated : 2021-07-12Cranberry Playlist Prologue
So, I’m not really great with introductions. But this is basically a story that I’ve been meaning to write for a while now without really knowing why or what I would really want out of it.Anyhow, I am Paul. I am a normal guy, “street smart”, pop culture-savvy, music enthusiast, creative, and always curious. My curiosity would almost always get me into trouble. I also usually have a lot of thoughts in my head which makes me an overthinker.However, my ultimate dreams are simple. To be able to build a home, nothing grand, just something that I could be comfortable with. To save enough for when I grow old, so that I could finally break free from the corporate world which has held me hostage for the longest amount of time. To be able to just sleep sound and not having to worry about the alarm going off.These thoughts have been running through my mind since I was a little boy. Yes, my curiosity already knew about those things even when I was young. I would often sneak out at ni
Last Updated : 2021-07-12Cranberry Playlist The First Time I Saw Her…
Hey guys! This is Black Banter, and welcome back to my blog. See what I did there? Haha! I’m thinking about changing my intro, so you’ll probably be reading weirder intros moving forward. Speaking of something new, I’m again on the hunt for new songs for my playlist, “Emotional Banana”. Please don’t ask about the name – it is what it is and I love it. I haven’t talked to you guys in a while. How are you? What have you guys been up to? I hope y’all are doing well. As for me, well, still moving on from heartbreak, as you all know. After being almost a mom to my kids and almost four years of being together, she decided to end our journey. Time doesn’t make a person the right one for you, I guess.Anyways, I can’t wait to listen to your song suggestions again. Let’s help each other embrace the pain we’re all currently enduring. Let’s revive this joint. And maybe - just maybe - we’ll be able to let go.I’m finally back on track with my blog. It feels so familiar to be writing ag
Last Updated : 2021-07-12Cranberry Playlist They Thought She’s The One…
Hola! Hope you guys are having a wonderful time unlike me.I have been constantly checking out the new girl at work, but I can’t seem to really talk to her. Something in me just pushes back, and I really don’t know how to initiate a conversation. At that time, I really didn’t want to botch up my chance in getting to know her better. But time is running out. Seeing that she is so beautiful, I am not the only one who’s attracted to her. I wanted to make a move — but I’d simply let fate determine if she was to notice me.I had been working with the company for quite a while, so much so that they had picked me up to do support for other employees. I was going about my day when lo and behold, a message popped up and – you already know whose name came along with it. “Hi! Uhm, I’m trying to figure out how to fix an issue with a customer. Can you help me, please?” said Audrey. In my mind, I was like, Oh my god! This is it! What should I do? “Hello, Audrey! Sure
Last Updated : 2021-07-12Cranberry Playlist Confession with Rivalry…
I was under her spell but I was not alone. A lot of guys have also been constantly flocking around her like vultures. She had that effect – the “Audrey” effect. But I was determined. I also didn’t want to have anything in common with these guys. I’m trying to simply utilize proper timing. “Paul, you really have to make a move. I’ve heard that Albert is being pushed by his teammates to pursue Audrey,” said Liana while shaking both my arms. “Wait a freaking second! First of all, I am not deaf. Second of all, I can hear you and lastly, I can hear his teammates wooing from here.” “What are you gonna do about it?” “I don’t know. Although it makes me grind my teeth.” A habit of mine which Audrey hates. “Well, you better get a move on, boy.” “I know, and I am just taking my time. I did tell you about my conversation with her a couple of weeks ago. Haven’t I?” “Yes. But Albert isn’t the only one trying to get her attention.” “I also know that he’s not the only o
Last Updated : 2021-07-12Cranberry Playlist First Breakfast Together…
It has been almost 6 months since I met Audrey, and my heart still flutters when she laughs, when she smiles. We got to dance to her favorite songs on a rainy morning. Eventually, we were having our first “breakfast” together. And yes, it’s just the two of us. Sitting in front of me, her hair has grown longer but still frames her face well. When she smiles and her round eyes squint, it feels like McDonald’s served more than McMuffins and coffees, but a shot of romance too.“The world's not forgiving of everyone's fears... The days turn into months, the months turn into years... So just for the moment, let's be still...”McDonald’s does know how to set the mood. “Why are you looking at me like that?” she asked shyly. “Oh, uhm, nothing. Your hair looks good on you,” I replied. “Uhm, thanks!” she said smiling. “Hey, Paul. Why don’t we play a game?” she asked. “What game?” I asked, confused with what game she had in mind. “It’s an easy one! We’re just gon
Last Updated : 2021-07-12Cranberry Playlist Getting Closer…
Days and weeks have passed, and we continued to have wonderful conversations after every shift. And I started looking forward to each time our shift ended because it would mean that I’d get to spend time with her. Being the person that I am, I sometimes tend to lose interest in talking. Although it may seem awkward, the fact is that I just tend to get lost in her eyes. Luckily, there’s Liana to always make the save whenever that happens.Liana is the type of friend I never knew that I’ll be having for life. She’s a little skinny woman who tends to be loud and awkward but is brutally honest. She’s like the sister I never had. There are times I would just meet up with her to talk about whatever the hell I’m doing with my life, what my plans are, and what I will do about my feelings for Audrey. “So, Liana. Thanks for seeing me even on such short notice,” I said as I invited her to see me one night. Or morning. It was a little past midnight in January. I couldn’t stop thinking
Last Updated : 2021-07-12
Latest chapter
Cranberry Playlist About the Author
About the AuthorJong Snow is a part-time content creator and a full-time employee. While he does not have relative experience in writing a book, his goal is to share stories that people could possibly relate to. The first novel he finished was a project he decided to work on during a very difficult time in his life.
Cranberry Playlist Epilogue
We now jump into the now, I just remembered having set up a blog from a while ago. I started working on it again when I found an old comment for one of my old playlists.It made things worse realizing that the same “A” who suggested the song for my playlist was Audrey. My Audrey. The woman who gave me everything and used to love me.Shortly after that, I pulled up Facebook only to find a shocker. A clip of Audrey. Out and about. But she’s with someone else. They were having breakfast. And you can go on guessing as to who she was with. I also found out about other things that I would no longer would want to write about seeing as it’s f*cking tearing me down to pieces just thinking about it. Thinking maybe they were just stories made up. I still think that she wouldn’t do me like that.In spite of how long it’s been, I constantly have to remind myself that she’s no longer coming home. And that I May never get to see her again in this lifetime.Going back to the first time I
Cranberry Playlist Is This Really “It”?
I tried doing other things to let the tension subside. I started going out. I went to see friends. I did virtually anything possible to keep myself together.Then one day, I decided to give it one last shot. To convince her to come home – to us.I went on and asked Ludi to send her a message and let her know that I was in the lobby of her office. My old office. She was kind enough to see me. But the air wasn’t the same as it was before. “Hello, Audrey.” I said nervously. “Hello, Paul. How’ve you been?” she replied. “I can’t say that I’m okay. But I’m glad to see you. So… I dropped by to ask if you’d like to get breakfast and talk about things?” “Oh… Uhm… Sorry… I can’t. I still have a lot of work to do.” “Come on, now. For old time’s sake?” “I really can’t.” “Come on, I can wait for you. I think we can have a decent conversation and go through things like we’re supposed to.” “Paul, I can’t. I have a lot of work to do. Have you been eating? I heard you were wit
Cranberry Playlist The Endgame…
I was determined to win her back. I knew it was taking a lot from both of us. I was trying my best to make something on my end. I took interviews for offshore locations in our office. Anything I could do to be better. I wanted to show her that I could be the person she could spend the rest of her life with. I think I was just looking at the issues from a different vantage point at that time.It took several days before we started talking again.But I managed to royally screw up everything – as expected. “I think you should just block me. So that I can no longer reach out to you.” “All I’m asking is a little time, Paul.” “That ‘little time’ will actually be longer. And it won’t be long, you’ll already forget about me.” “Just give me a bit of time to figure this out on my own. And stop implying that you didn’t break up with me. You broke my heart.” “I’m sorry, Audrey. I just want the pain to stop.” “And you think this isn’t hurting me? Knowing that I’m the one who h
Cranberry Playlist Overcoming My Episodes…Or Not?
We continued to move forward even with a lot of things happening in between regardless if things became exhausting. I have to admit that everything was always out of control. There was too much to remember to do, too much to remember not to do, and none of it really made sense.It was, at times, hard, uncomfortable, and unpleasant. We spent the rest of our relationship doing unnatural things to make each other happy without any idea if the other was still happy. It started to turn into a disaster.But I still believed in us. The way she told me that she believed in me back then.We celebrated what would be our last anniversary with her friends in Zambales. We surely were having fun. But as things went, I had a panic attack. Then, we had a conversation that I wish I could go back to and rectify. “How are you doing, love? You don’t look so good,” she worriedly asked. “I’m okay. Although, I was still thinking about how to resolve my problems all day. But yes, I’m okay,” I a
Cranberry Playlist Surprising Each Other…
We always try to outdo each other when it comes to creating surprises during each other’s birthdays. Because we were both creative, we do our best to make those days extra special.She hates it when I surprise her because she knows my tell. She knows when I laugh internally. I always blow my cover and end up prematurely telling what the surprise is all about. Regardless, I still manage to make her smile.But nothing beats the time when she surprised me at work.It was a normal day. I noticed that one of my friends, Russ, was acting strange. And missing in action was Pinky. I could smell that something was off. I just couldn’t quite put my finger on it. “So Russ, where’s Pinky? Isn’t she supposed to be with us?” I wondered. “Uhm… She told me a while ago that she… Uhm… Needed to check something out in the mall,” he nervously but happily responded. “Okay. You done smoking?” “Yes. But can we like light another one? I just felt the need to do so.” “You know I’ll never s
Cranberry Playlist A Memorable Concert…
It wasn’t always sunshine and rainbows, but there we were – still trying to patch things up. It was still a great deal of challenge since, in a sense, we couldn’t reveal that we were together because of her parents.She did always find a way to see me. I always looked forward to seeing her as I loved cooking for her. I immersed myself in watching cooking videos and always asked what she wanted to eat. 9 times out of 10, she would say “Sinigang, bruh!”Aside from being foodies, the love for music was another thing we had in common – which takes us to the time when we saw LANY’s concert. That day started a bit odd, though. It seemed like I woke up on the wrong side of bed. “Good morning! What a nice day,” was Audrey's wonderful greeting. “Hello, Audrey. I forced myself to wake up. I had a bad dream.” “What happened?” She worriedly asked. “I was working in a different, but familiar place. I saw you, but couldn’t get to you. Can you guess why?” “I dunno.” “It still hu
Cranberry Playlist Volcanic Adventures...
As mentioned in an earlier entry, she taught me how to drive. She was eager to make sure that I am formidable as she didn’t want me to get into trouble should we get to have our own car. But that urge to teach didn’t end with just me. She also wanted to bring our friends on board the wagon. Which brings us to a special time when they dragged me to Tagaytay. “I’m excited!” she said in a jolly tone. “For what? Wait. Do you have any plans on Sunday?” “For Saturday! I don’t have any moolah though, but still! I hope we don’t get to spend much in Tagaytay! And no, I don’t think I have any plans this Sunday. Although we might go home Sunday morning. Why?” “Oh. You’d be spending all night there? Because I was planning to get a haircut on Sunday.” “Really? We’ll leave in the afternoon. The original plan was just to go to U.P., but they decided to go further. So definitely, we’ll take until the morning before being able to go home.” “Who’s going to drive?” “Me and Ian. We’l
Cranberry Playlist Lucky Me...
Some time had passed since our anniversary trip. The continuous driving lessons, nice dinners and we were still having a good but sometimes toxic relationship. I think I have a huge role to play regarding the latter. I slipped into depression through the course of what happened between me and my ex. There’s more into it that I can put into words. And I know, Audrey was deeply affected by it too, but we still tried to make things work. I decided to move out of Limefy to take a break. I was exhausted. The reason is that I’m always getting into unwarranted altercations with people due to my frustration on how my career has been.Through it all, Audrey was still supportive.I took a month off to plan a business with a couple of friends. Everything was set in motion. Audrey, being the very encouraging partner that she is, continued to support this venture. She even took the time to go with me on meetings and all the stuff that came along with it. “Hey, love. Good morning! Can
