CHAPTER 2: GETTING MARRIED

7 YEARS LATER

MANHATTAN, NEW YORK

"What do you think is the first step to unlove someone?" the host asked.

"You should stop seeing them. Seeing them often will always remind you how deep your affection towards that person. It'll be easier to unlove them if they were out of your sight. Focus on other things, pursue your dreams, focus on yourself."

"That's deep. I'm wondering if it's based on your personal experiences?"

"Maybe." Ruby Rose smiled playfully and shrugged her shoulders.

Pinatay ni Ruby Rose ang cellphone at inilapag sa lamesa. Dinampot niya ang shades at isinuot bago umayos ng higa sa beach lounge chair.

She smiled bitterly when she remembered what she answered to that question from the host of that vlog, the one she was watching on her phone. It was already uploaded in the internet.

She was invited by a famous vlogger, who had millions of followers in Youtube and in other social media platforms, to be featured in one of their episodes. Their YouTube channel was known to feature famous celebrities and personalities. Ruby Rose couldn't pass on the opportunity so she accepted the invitation.

Alam niyang magtatanong ang may-ari ng nasabing channel ng tungkol sa pag-ibig. Everytime they have a guest, the host always asked their guest questions and opinions related to love. She had anticipated the last question asked to her and she already knew how to answer it.

How could you really unlove someone? Hanggang ngayon ay iisang tao lang ang umuukopa ng puso niya. Even after all these years, even after she had met a lot of people, even after she was away from him for seven years.

She was eighteen when she had read somewhere that the best way to forget someone was to stop seeing them. Out of sight, out of mind. Whoever said that was a fraud.

Akala niya’y nakalimutan niya na si Russel, na nakalimutan na niyang mahal niya ito. Pero mali siya ng inakala.

She saw Russel almost a week ago when she went to her aunt Katie's place in Chicago. Bababa na sana siya ng sasakyan nang makita ang binata sa labas ng bahay. Marahas na kumakabog ang kanyang dibdib at natatakot siyang harapin ito kaya hindi siya tumuloy at muling nagbook ng flight pabalik sa Brooklyn kung nasaan ang kanyang apartment.

Hindi niya alam kung saan nagmula ang takot niya na harapin si Russel. But she recognized the other reason why her heart was beating too fast. It behaved the same way as it did before everytime she saw him. She had realized that she missed him after seeing him in person, it was the first time after seven years.

She called her aunt and told her that she could not make it to her aunt's house because she had an emergency, and that she had a gig in Manhattan. Sinabi niya ritong isang linggo siya roon at hindi makakauwi. Alam niyang hindi magtatagal si Russel ng one-week sa bahay ng kanyang aunt Katie at uncle Gascon, ang adoptive parent ni Russel, dahil sa trabaho nito sa Pilipinas.

Na-guilty siya sa ginawang pagsisinungaling at sa hindi pagsipot sa birthday ng Aunt Katie niya kaya tinotoo niya ang sinabi. From Brooklyn, she drove to Manhattan immediately. Wala siyang ibang naisip na gawin kaya sa isang beach club siya dumiretso. She had been there before and she liked the place.

Nagustuhan niya ang lugar na iyon dahil hindi masiyadong maraming tao. It was an ideal place for someone like her who wanted a peace of mind. Everyone was minding their own business, so she was not concern about her public image. And it was not like everyone know her, hindi pa naman lumalaki ang ulo niya para isiping ganoon siya kasikat.

Ruby Rose was sunbathing; it wouldn’t hurt if she got a tan. Most people wanted a tan skin because they thought it looked sexier. Surely her manager wouldn’t mind if she got a little darker.

Bumalik siya sa kanyang hotel room nang tumirik na ang araw. She soaked in the tub and took a bath after that.

“I’m so lonely,” she uttered to no one while staring at the ceiling of her room. She wanted to be alone and now that she was all on her own, she felt lonely. Madalian ang pagpunta niya sa Manhattan at lahat ng mga kaibigan niya ay busy sa kanya-kanyang trabaho. Ruby Rose didn’t have a lot of true friends in New York, there were only two of them. If only it was a plan trip, then they could’ve accompanied her.

Dinampot niya ang cellphone nang marinig na tumunog iyon. It was notification from one of her social media accounts.

Dismayado si Ruby Rose, akala niya ay nagreply ang bestfriend niyang nasa Pilipinas sa kanyang mensahe rito. Hindi niya maiwasang magtampo sa kaibigan dahil ilang linggo na itong hindi nagrereply sa kanyang mga chats at texts. She back read their conversation and the last exchange of messages between was a month ago.

Her friend was a corporate woman who was working at her family’s company. Magkaibigan na sila mga bata palang dahil parehong negosiyante ang kanilang mga ama. Kung may tao man siyang napagsasabihan ng kanyang mga problema bukod sa kanyang mommy ay ang bestfriend niya iyon. She trusted her with her secrets. Aside from Russel ay ito lang ang nakakaalam ng ginawa niya seven years ago.

Noong bagong lipat niya sa New York ay halos araw-araw silang nagcha-chat ng kaibigan. Her friend was worried that she might be lonely in a foreign country.

Ngayong taon ay madalang nalang ang pagpapalitan nila ng messages. Pero hindi pa nangyaring hindi ito nagreply sa kanya ng mahigit isang buwan. She badly needed someone to talk to right now.

“Are you busy? I miss you.” Muli niyang pinadalhan ng mensahe ang kaibigan bago inilapag ang cellphone.

She tried getting sleep because she didn’t have anything else to do.

When her phone rang again, it was her ringtone this time indicating that someone was calling her. She felt excited expecting that it was her friend. Napbuntung-hininga nalang siya nang makitang ang manager niya iyon. Kapagkuwan ay napangiwi nang maalalang hindi siya nagpa-alam dito na pupunta siya ng Manhattan. Her manager was in vacation for a week. Ngayon ang balik nito mula sa bakasyon.

Nang ikatlong araw niya sa Manhattan ay pinadalhan niya ito ng mensahe. She told them that she also wanted to unwind. Napagsabihan siya nito dahil hindi siya nagsabi agad, ang unang plano niya ay magpahinga lang sa kanyang apartment at bibisitahin ang kanyang Aunt Katie sa birthday nito habang wala pa silang modeling gig. They always have her schedule planned beforehand, kahit na ang mga bakasyon niya ay nakaplano. It was to make sure that her public image remains good, they didn’t want controversies that could ruin her name. Halos two weeks siyang walang project kaya may time silang makapagrelax. It was hectic the previous months that’s why they deserve the break.

“When are you coming back, Rosy?”

“I’m going home tomorrow,” sagot niya sa manager.

“You have a shoot for Anastasia’s on Friday. It’s for their new jeans collection.”

Anastasia’s was a famous clothing brand, she had modelled for them before in their summer clothing collection. They were one of those brands who trusted her when she was only a rookie in modeling, she would always accept a project from them. She liked the owner of the brand, the staff were friendly and they pay good amount of money.

“I saw Hudson on my trip, he was asking if you change your number because you didn’t reply to his messages. Mr. Booker and Gavin also texted me, asking the same thing.”

Ngumiti si Ruby Rose, na-i-imagine niya kung paano umikot ang mga mata ng manager. That’s not the first time someone who was interested in her asked her manager about her whereabouts. Mr. Booker was also a manager of a model actor who she had a project with, he was almost fifty, for crying out loud. Halos kaedad lang ito ng kaniyang daddy. Gavin was a ramp model she also met before, she believed he was a year older than her, they had texted for a short while but she lost interest and stopped replying to his messages. As for someone named Hudson, she didn’t have an idea who that person was. She met a lot of people and she could not possibly memorize everyone’s name and faces.

Ilang minuto siyang nakipag-usap sa manager at lihim na nagpasalamat dito dahil kahit na papaano ay nakalimutan niya ang tungkol kay Russel at ang tampo niya sa kanyang bestfriend.

 IT WAS SUNSET when Ruby Rose went out to the terrace connected to her room. She was relaxing while drinking her tea and looking at the horizon when she felt someone’s presence.

It was a man, maybe around one-eighty centimeter tall. He was wearing a khaki short and a basic white shirt. He must be Caucasian based on his looks.

Hindi exclusive ang terrace na iyon sa kanya. She was sharing it with whoever occupied the room next to her. May mga rooms naman doon na solo ng guest ang terrace. But she chose that room because it had a nice view, she didn’t mind sharing it with someone though she was informed when she checked in that the next room was vacant. Bagong dating lang marahil ang guest na iyon.

“Hi,” she said and smiled at him. He had a pleasant face, very easy to the eyes.

“Hey, do you mind?” He was asking for permission if he could sit on the lounge chair across her.

“No, go ahead, it’s all yours.”

Ibinalik niya ang tingin sa magandang view, walang nagsasalita sa kanila ng ilang minuto dahil nakatutok ito sa cellphone. She was starting to feel awkward when she suddenly heard him talk.

“I knew it!”

She looked at him, genuinely curious.

“Oh, I’m sorry. I am not trying to be rude, but you look very familiar, so, I browse the internet and saw this.”

She leaned her body forward to see what he was showing her in his phone. It was her; she was featured in that magazine around seven months ago when she started to be more well known to people. The company wasn’t as big as the other major companies, but it was enough to reach a wide audience.

“Yeah, that’s me, so you read that magazine?” She said and smiled at him.

“It was actually my sister’s, she likes you by the way.”

“You’re kidding me?”

“I am not, in fact she’ll be jealous when she’ll know that I met you here. Small world, huh? My name’s Todd.”

Talking to Todd, Ruby Rose realized that he was a good conversationalist. Ang plano niya kaninang bumalik sa loob ng kanyang silid pagkaubos ng kanyang tea ay hindi natuloy. He was a great companion and she found herself enjoying his presence.

They had dinner together on the seafood and steak restaurant near the beach. They talk about random staff and she had learned a lot of things about him because he loved talking. She liked the fact that he was not asking for her personal life.

Todd was working a corporate job, he got burned out with his monotonous life and decided to take a leave from work. He was there for a vacation. She also learned that he just broken up with his longtime girlfriend, they were together since they were fifteen. Almost fifteen years of being together but they still broken up, how messed up was that?

Nang maubos ang wine na kanilang ini-inom ay bumalik na sila sa kanilang hotel room.

“Wanna hook up?” tanong nito nang makarating sila sa harap ng pinto ng kanyang silid.

Natawa siya rito. “You don’t really mean that.”

“Why not?”

She shook her head and opened her door. “Maybe the next time we meet and when you’re already moved on from your ex.”

He smiled at her and ruffled her hair. “Goodbye, Ms. Model, and thank you for the photo, my sister would be very jealous.”

Ruby Rose was glad that her last night in Manhattan wasn’t bad. The next day, the sun was barely peeking when she drove back to her apartment in Brooklyn. It was almost lunch when her manager fetched her to meet with the brand they will going to work with.

The day after her photoshoot with Anastasia’s, she had a visitor in her apartment. It was her Aunt Katie who had a wide smile on her face, she looked elated and excited.

Nang malaman niya kung bakit tila masayang masaya ito ay parang gumuho ang mundo niya.

“Russel was getting married next month.”

Hindi makapagsalita si Ruby Rose sa ibinalita ng tiya. Katie kept on talking in front of her, she was very happy. Ngunit tila hindi niya ito naririnig, she was still processing the news.

“E-Excuse me, I need to use the bathroom.”

Nagmamadali siyang pumunta sa banyo at hindi pinansin ang pagtawag ng kanyang Aunt Katie.

She placed her hands on the sink for support while staring at herself in the mirror. Her mind was blank, she just realized that she was crying when she felt her tears fell on her hand.

“Oh,” bulalas niya habang nakahawak sa basang pisngi. She let out a hollow laugh. “Why are you crying? It’s okay,” she said while trying to calm herself.

The pain and betrayal she was feeling in her heart were very familiar. It reminded her when she was eighteen.

Ruby Rose was now twenty-five and she was experiencing her second heartbreak. And it was because of the same person, because of the same old feeling.