Chapter TwelveSam“What the fuck was that?” Mason elbows me hard in the ribs as soon as Lauren and her friend Paige step away, talking to someone they know who just came into the bar.“What?”“That.”“What is that?” I shoot back, annoyed more at myself than at Mason. I know exactly what he’s talking about.“Have you been doing the drugs meant for your patients and it’s caused brain damage?”“Yes, Mason. I do drugs during surgery. Half my patients are actually awake and screaming.”“I’m honestly a little concerned,” he says seriously. “Chloe just invited you to spend the night with her and you turned her down.”“She did not. Chloe and I…we’re…we’re not like that.”“But you want to be,” Mason shoots back. “Don’t you?”I’ve never wanted anything more in my life, and seeing her again only reaffirms how much I do. She’s gorgeous, obviously, but there’s so much more to her, and I want to get to know each and every layer of her complexity. Even as kids, there was nothing simple about Chloe,
Chapter ThirteenChloeWhat the hell is wrong with me? I don’t like pain. I go to great lengths to avoid it. Sometimes I take Advil before settling down for a writing sprint because I know my back will hurt from sitting still for hours on end. I avoided the dentist for an impressive three years without getting another cavity because I was scared the one I needed filled would hurt. I might be stupid, but my tiny human brain can at least process that pain is bad.So why the hell did I agree to go to the Harrises’ for dinner tonight?“Ughhh,” I huff to myself and take off my shoes, closing the front door behind me. I set my bag from Silver Café on the counter and go upstairs, trading my workout clothes for a sundress. I couldn’t sleep when I got home from the bar last night and stayed up taking my frustrations out by getting lost in my story. I wrote nearly five thousand words before I fell asleep on the couch in the living room.I woke up, got dressed, and had every intention of going f
Chapter FourteenSam“You can’t be serious?” Chloe shoots back, making me think I’ve laid it on too thick. I don’t want to run away to the nearest chapel, but I am desperate for any reason to be with Chloe. I’m terrified she’s going to jerk her hand back and tell me there was a good reason she moved away and never looked back. I’ve dodged relationships over the years, knowing no one could ever hold a candle to my Chloe, connecting more on a physical level.It’s what I know. It’s what I’m good at. And I’m certain Chloe will enjoy it. I want more with her, but this is the only route I know to go.Chloe blinks several times, long lashes fluttering over her pretty green eyes. A warm breeze blows in from the lake, messing up Chloe’s already messy hair. “You want to get married?”“Well, no,” I start.“But that was the promise, was it not?”“We don’t have to start with marriage,” I say back.“What do you want to start with?” Her eyes are wide, and before I get the chance to answer, the waite
Chapter FifteenChloeI need someone to pinch me.No, really. I might offer the couple over there, clearly on their first date, twenty bucks per pinch because I’m having a good time with Sam—a really good time with Sam. We’re talking, just casually talking, and it feels so good to hang out like this again. I forgot how easy he was to get along with, and now that my heart has settled back into my chest, it almost feels like old times.Almost. Because I know for certain Sam wants to sleep with me, and I can’t get that out of my mind.“We still have a few weeks left,” I tell him, putting my empty glass on the table. “It’s not too late to buy a costume online and go.”“But getting the time off work,” Sam starts, and I laugh, knowing he’s full of shit. “That might be tricky.”“Bullshit,” I laugh. “You just told me you get several days off every month, and that always includes a weekend. You’re just scared.”“I am not,” Sam counters.“Then put on some tights and come to the Renaissance Fair
Chapter SixteenChloe“Are you okay?” Sam asks as I stick the key in the lock. We’re on the front porch of the lake house.“Yeah,” I rush out. “My shoulder just hurts.” It’s a lame excuse for me being rather quiet on the car ride to my dad’s house, but it’s all I can come up with right now. I spent most of the drive reminding myself I can’t be mad at Sam. I can’t consider him hooking up with Lauren another betrayal. He doesn’t seem to remember Lauren was a raging bitch to me in high school. I think only Farisha and my dad knew the extent of her bullying. I never hid things from Sam—except my love for him, of course—but I didn’t go rushing off to tell him a run-down of the mean comments Lauren said to me throughout the day.“Maybe take an Advil or something.”“I can do better.” I unlock the door and step inside. Sam follows, and I’m wishing I could uninvite him over. Okay, I don’t. But I should. I take my shoes off as I walk and end up tripping over my own feet. Sam dashes forward and
Chapter SeventeenSam“Where have you been?” Mason looks up from his phone, half-eaten sandwich in his hand.“I went for a run,” I say, taking off my shoes.“Bullshit you were running the whole time.”“What, afraid you can’t keep up?”“I could outrun you any day,” Mason shoots back.Rory comes into the kitchen holding Adam and gives me a pointed look. “Don’t start,” she warns.I take Adam from her, bouncing him gently in my arms. He reaches for my nose, smiling.“Start what?” Mason asks, taking another bite of his sandwich.“You know,” Rory says, opening the fridge.“No, I don’t.”Rory rolls her eyes. “You’re stupidly competitive, and it’s annoying.”“I am not,” Mason spits back. “Okay, fine, I am. So where were you?”“Running, that whole time. Blindfolded and uphill both ways. Barefoot too.”“Hah-hah,” Mason snickers. “Hilarious. Next time you want to actually work out, let me know.”“What, are you going to go cut down trees or something? With an ax like a real man,” Rory retorts.“Y
Chapter EighteenChloe“It’s so good to see you!” Mrs. Harris pulls me in for a big hug. Sam and I just stepped into the farmhouse and his mother bombarded me just like Sam warned she would. Mrs. Harris really steppedin when my mom died, and losing contact with Sam meant not talking to his family anymore either.“You too,” I reply.“It’s been way too long.” She gives me a final squeeze before letting me go. “You’re even prettier than I remember. You look like your mother.” Mrs. Harris blinks away tears, and I have to blink several times to keep from tearing up as well.“Dinner smells amazing,” I tell her, looking at the spread of appetizers on the counter. “I hope you didn’t go through too much trouble.”“It’s never trouble for you, dear.” She smiles.“Hey, Chloe!” Rory whispers, coming into the room holding her sleeping baby. I flash her a big smile.“Hey,” I say back, just as quietly. “He’s so sweet.”“He is, but my arm is falling asleep and I have to pee,” Rory chuckles softly.“I’
Chapter NineteenSamThe little shit was serious.He’s putting the moves on Chloe, right in fucking front of me. She looks a little confused as she taps her shot glass against his, and gags when she tosses the whiskey back. She and Mason both burst out laughing, and Chloe waves her hand in front of her face.“That’s terrible! Oh my god!” She’s still laughing and turns around to go to the sink. She rinses her shot glass and fills it with water, taking a drink.“Now that we’ve gotten the worst out of the way, try this one.” Mason unscrews the lid to a bottle of peach vodka.“It’s probably not a good idea to be mixing types of alcohol like that,” I say.“Told you he’s lame,” Mason huffs, and I glare at him, still in disbelief he’s hitting on Chloe. She’s my— Well, she’s not my anything. She was my best friend but she’s not anymore, and I fucking hate how much that hurts.“He’s right.” Chloe’s eyes go to mine. “I shouldn’t mix booze like this, and I had wine with dinner. I don’t want to g
EpilogueChloe“Relax,” I tell Sam, trying not to laugh.“I thought they said riding a horse was like riding a bike. Once you learn how to do it, it just comes back to you.”Now I do laugh. I circle Spartan around, clicking my tongue at Drake, an eighteen-year-old horse we recently adopted so Sam can go trail riding with me. Drake is the perfect “husband horse” and has much more whoa than go, and right now is doing everything he can to pull the reins from Sam’s hands so he can graze.“Pull him up,” I tell Sam. “And ask him forward. He’s testing you.”“Come on, buddy,” Sam urges and asks the horse to walk forward. Spartan, who’s ready to race along the dirty trail, speed-walks up ahead, acting as good motivation for Drake to follow us. It’s a rare sixty-five-degree day in early March, and we’re taking advantage of the nice weather while we can.I leave for a month-long tour in Europe in just a few days, and instead of just doing book signings, Charles and are attending panels to talk a
Chapter Forty-nineSamFour months later…I stomp snow off my shoes and enter my apartment building, chilled right down to the bone just from the short walk from my car to the building. It’s been a long day, and work and the snow and cold makes me even more eager to get inside my warm apartment.“Good evening, Dr. Harris,” one of the attendants says.“Good evening. Staying warm?” I pull my gloves off and stuff them in my pocket.“I’m trying,” he replies with a chuckle, pushing the door closed behind me, wanting to seal off the cold air as fast as possible. I quickly grab my mail and then head up, squeezing in the elevator with a few other people.I’m the last to get off and hurry down the hall to my apartment, unlocking the door with haste.“Hey, babe,” I say and step inside, shutting the door behind me. “What are you doing in the dark?”Chloe turns away from the living room window, mug of steaming coffee in her hand. She’s illuminated by the light coming in behind her, so beautiful i
Chapter Forty-eightChloeTurning away from the coffee pot that I was plugging in, I look to see who’s at the door. I don’t remember having any deliveries scheduled for today, but I have a bad habit of buying stuff off of Instagram ads and then forgetting about it. Only delivery drivers and a select few friends know the code to my gate, though that doesn’t mean someone couldn’t have hopped the fence.“Can I help you?” Charles asks right as it hits me that someone could have seen Charles come over and is trying to get a candid photo of him. Which now makes me feel bad for asking him to answer the door, but dammit, I need coffee. I fell asleep early—before I could drink more wine—but I can tell a headache is coming on fast.Eric got up nearly an hour ago and has been out jogging since. Charles and I dragged out butts out of our rooms not all that long ago, both grumbling about being too old to drink like we used to.Unable to see who’s at the door, I sidestep, and Sam’s clear blue eyes
Chapter Forty-sevenSamLooking around the airport, I take a drink of my coffee, waiting for the caffeine rush to kick in. I need it. It’s going to be a long night. There were no direct overnight flights to LA from Chicago tonight, so I’m landing in Texas, changing planes, and will get to LA early in the morning. It’s the fastest way I can get to Chloe, and I cannot fucking wait to pull her into my arms and tell her the good news.I feel a little bad that I didn’t call Chloe when I was leaving the hospital, but I knew I wouldn’t be able to keep this from her, and I know how much she’ll enjoy the surprise. I was able to get the next two days off and then work an overnight shift on the third. As long as I’m able to sleep on the plane, I’ll be fine.I take another drink of coffee and lean back in the uncomfortable chair, fighting off the urge to fall asleep. I’ll close my eyes as soon as I’m on the plane, but I don’t want to take the risk of missing my flight if I fall asleep now.My pho
Chapter Forty-sixChloeI turn on my electric fireplace and grab two wine glasses, joining Charles on the couch. We’re back at my place, and I feel a little better after talking over lunch.“Red or white?” Charles asks, motioning to the wine bottles on the coffee table.“You pick. As long as it gets me tipsy to numb the pain, I’m good.” I grab a blanket and spread it over both our laps. The plan is to drink wine, order junk food later, and just hang out. Charles leaves soon to go overseas to work on a movie, and who knows where I’ll be.“The red then.” He gives me a look and opens the bottle of Merlot, pouring us both a generous amount. “I thought you were feeling better?”“I was.” I take a sip of wine and lean back. “I’m trying to shake the feeling that things aren’t meant to be and I’m struggling.”“Just because something isn’t perfect doesn’t mean it’s not meant to be,” he counters.“I know.” I nod and take another drink of wine, this time setting my glass down so I’m not tempted t
Chapter Forty-fiveSamI grab my phone from my locker and check for missed calls or texts. Chloe called me while I was in surgery, and I immediately call her back. The service in the locker room is shitty, and the call drops before her phone even rings. Quickly changing, I stuff my phone in my pocket, grab my keys and wallet, and head out to get something to eat.I’m on-call and need to stay nearby, but don’t have to stay on the hospital campus. I could go home, though I’ve gotten stuck in traffic, made it into the lobby of my apartment building and then got called back. Sitting through hours of surgery with nothing but granola bars in my stomach isn’t fun, so I pull out my phone to order food as I walk to the car.It rings only seconds after I step into the parking garage. It’s Stacey.“Hello?” I answer.“Hey,” she replies. “Are you busy?”“Not at the moment. I’m on-call and was going to get something to eat.”“Oh, good. I was just saying how hungry I was and I’m near your hospital.
Chapter Forty-fourChloeI drop my bags in the kitchen and walk through my large, empty house, going upstairs to my bedroom. I’m always a little freaked out to come home to an empty house after I’ve been away from a while. I have a top-of-the-line security system, so logically, I know no one could be in the house without setting off the alarm. I can go through the activity log from the last few days too and make sure no doors or windows have been opened, giving myself peace of mind.Though right now, I could use the distraction. I had a lot of time to think on the plane, and I came to the conclusion that while this sucks, I’m being dramatic. Single parents date with no issues. But starting a long-distance relationship while taking care of a newborn is a lot, and I can’t expect Sam, who already works long hours at a highly stressful job, to be able to fly to California for a quick weekend to romp around the set of a TV show with me.And there’s no way he can come visit me in Europe.I
Chapter Forty-threeSam“What?” Chloe asks, and the smile on her face fades away.“My ex says she’s pregnant.” I swallow the vomit rising in my throat. Time slows, and I watch Chloe, heart racing as I wait for her to reply.She pulls her hands from mine. “That is…that is definitely not what I thought you were going to—what?” She shakes her head.“Stacey…my, uh, ex, told me she’s pregnant and I’m the father.” Chloe, clearly stunned, steps back a few paces, dangerously close to the shallow shoreline. She brings a hand to her face and rubs her temples. Seconds tick by, and they feel like years. Say something, Chloe. Please. Anything.Finally, she opens her mouth only to close it again. “Your ex-girlfriend?”“Yeah,” I say, and a weight comes off my shoulders, though judging by the look on Chloe’s face, a heavy weight just landed on hers. “I know it’s a shock. It was for me too.”Chloe closes her eyes, rubbing her forehead. “What?” she repeats. “I…I thought…I thought you were…you’re
Chapter Forty-twoChloe “I have good and bad news.” I set my phone on the patio table and sit back down, pulling the blanket tighter around my shoulders. “Yeah?” Sam settles back into his chair, looking a little uneasy. He keeps flicking his gaze to Mason, who’s giving him a weird, unreadable look back. They’re having some sort of unspoken conversation, something only the two of them can understand. I used to wish I had a sibling solely based on how close all the Harris kids were. They fought like cats and dogs at times, but at the end of the day, they were a family and loved each other. I’ve always considered myself lucky to be part of it, even though I wanted to be part of it in a different way—the way I am now. “My agent was able to negotiate a much better contract with the network. She thinks I’ll like this one a lot more.” “And the bad news?” Mason asks. “The head honchos at the network want to meet with me Tuesday morning, so I’ll have to get