tell me a filipino joke

York Langston locked me up for six months. Word on the street was he dropped over 100 million to buy me my own private island. Security here? Tight enough to rival the White House. Even a bird that flew past the area would get shot down on sight. But what nobody knew… All that luxury people envied? To me, it was just a gilded cage. It wasn't until he found a woman who looked almost like me that his interest began to fade. One day, she stormed the island with a gang at her back while he was away. She slashed my tendons and carved up my face with a blade before locking me inside a cage with a rabid dog. I was barely breathing by the time York finally found me. "York, this woman thought she could fool you by imitating me? She must be a spy! You'll have to flay her alive if you want her to talk!"

Seraphina has a pretty normal life, but she craves for more, she wants adventures, love. She just wants to have an exciting life other than school and home. Phoenix on the other hand, runs a very bloody one. Vampires fear when they hear his name and the fact that, he is also a Royal vampire, the strongest kind. One situation will put him on Seraphina's path. But will she even remember him? All she wanted was some fun in her life, but this wasnt what she meant.

Ivan Trevelyan is one of the most successful business owners in New York. Dark, rude, and fearsome, his employees are forced to put up with his constant mood swings and insatiable demands. He is known mostly for his good looks, wealth, and arrogant personality and he has enough superiority to fire his employees with just a snap of his fingers.Isabelle Greene just landed herself as Ivan's secretary, only to find out that her boss isn't just arrogant, but also narcissistic and egocentric. But she can't quit her job, because she needs the paycheck.Her life was normal and perfect until he came in and cracked a deal that she couldn't refuse.

Rubie Jane Estrada is a simple but very beautiful woman. Before his father died he revealed the truth about Rubie's mother. Rubie decided to go to the city and find her mother, while Rubie was traveling she met Kester Tacuel who helped her. At Rubie's workplace she met Daryl Hermosa who became friends and eventually fell in love with each other. Rubie met his grandfather and his mother, his grandfather welcomed him and let him live in his mansion. Rubie's grandfather discovered the relationship between Rubie and Daryl, so he forced Rubie to divorce Daryl and marry the granddaughter of his friend Kester Tacuel. Rubie's Grandfather succeeds in getting Kester and Rubie married. Who will Rubie stay with? What if he learns a big secret that will change his life. Will Rubie love her husband?

An enthralling Italian romance filled with revenge. Theodore De'leon, a thirty year old smoking hot yet broken billionaire and Mafia lord, seeks to avenge his family's murder by their enemies, the Romanos, which he experienced when he was just a boy. After being Raised by his grandmother, Mrs. Alexandra Galterio, Theodore returns to Italy his homeland 20 years later to fulfill his promise. * Aria Romano, the female protagonist of the story is the first daughter of the Romanos, who lives a life of pretense as the family’s loving daughter, despite her stepmother's disdain and her father's indifference. Theodore manipulates Aria, intending to use her in his revenge plan, but unexpectedly finds himself falling for her. As their relationship deepens, Theodore must confront his grandmother's disapproval against their love as they also face challenging obstacles and discover deep secrets. Will love triumph over vengeance in this intense tale of passion and betrayal?

This is book 2 of the series: THE DEVIL, THE MERCENARY AND THE SAINT Jake and Gabby are no longer together. Gabby runaway after getting bored with her married life, she run off with Dan and was now living in Miami. As for Jake, he never remarried. He just focused his attention to Simone. That’s what people saw and they didn’t bother to clarify it. The truth was they are still attracted to each other. The attraction that was hard to fight. They show up in the same events since they have the same circle of friends. These two are fighting a losing battle resisting each other. Who knows what would happen to them? Fingers cross that they save each other and just settle to be together.Well get ready to take another trip down memory lane. Let's discover the journey that these two traveled. From pretending to falling in love and enduring all trials just to be back in each others arms.*****She started a relationship for the wrong reasons but end up falling hard for him. With her past caught up with her present she chose to leave to protect her family. But still ends up involving her love ones to a mixed up situation. He started a relationship with her just to prove everyone wrong. He didn't expect to fall head over heels for her. When he discovered who she really is, he tried to win her over again. Book 1: Angel you're Mine Book 2: Save Me Book 3: Broken Vows

Kyrah Bailey is a 21 year old who ends up falling in love with Blake Dawson, a tycoons son, who ends up breaking her heart over and over. Reason? There's something going on between Blake and his neighbor, Sabrina Johnson. While Kyrah is lost in this toxic love as Sabrina tortures her, she doesn't see the one and only guy who truly loves her, Scott Stone. her best friend. Will she be able to forgive Blake? What's between him and Sabrina? What will she do when her entire world crumbles down because of one person?

"I hate you! Damn it, I love you..." "I know you do..." Everything will change in a life of a 22 years old blondy Jessica Miller when she moves to college in Seatlle, Washington to become a surgeon. Meeting a 31 years old Mike Dupont, Jessica's life will turn upside down.

(BOOK ONE: THE LAST WALTZ) Naniniwala siyang ang lahat ng nangyayari gaano man kasakit ay may magandang dahilan. At para kay JV ay si Vinnie iyon. Everything was so perfect at tanging sa piling lang ni Vinnie niya naramdaman iyon. Pero noon naman biglang pumasok sa eksena ang kuya ni Vinnie na may malalim palang galit sa kanya. At iyon ang naging dahilan kaya nalagay sa panganib ang buhay ng pinakamamahal niya. (BOOK 2: UNCONDITIONALLY) Si Dave? Sa unang tingin mukha itong suplado. Notorious playboy type. At siguro kung ganito kagwapo ang boyfriend niya, ready siyang umiiyak ng kahit ilang beses pa! Pero hindi siya pinaiyak ni Dave. Dahil higit pa yata sa kayang gawin ng sinomang lalaki ang ginawa nitong pagpoprotekta kay Audace. Pero hanggang kailan siya kayang sagipin ni Dave? Lalo't nagbalik si Alfred at nakahanda siya nitong bawiin. (BOOK 3: FRAGILE HEART) Unlike his friends, naranasan na ni Lemuel ang magmahal ng totoo. Ang kaibahan nga lang, hindi niyanagawang aminin sa babaeng iyon angnararamdaman niya. Until dumating si Careen na sa unang pagkikita palang ay nagkaroon na ng espesyal na lugar sa puso niya. Pero muli nanaman siyang sinorpresa ng pagkakataon sa pagbabalik ni Bianca. (BOOK 4: INSEPARABLE) Sa kanilang apat siya ang pinaka-babaero. Pero nagbago ang lahat nang makilala niya ang anak ng babaeng pinakasalan ng Daddy niya, walang iba kundi si Louise na sa kalaunan ay narealized niyang ilang beses narin pala niyang nakatagpo. Hindi lang ang protective instinct niya ang pinukaw ni Louise kaya minabuti niya itong bakuran sa SJU. Kundi mas higit ang mailap na puso niya, dahil ang totoo hindi niya napigilan ang unti-unting mahulog at kalaunan ay mahalin ang dalaga. Gusto niya itong maging masaya, gusto niya itong protektahan. Pero paano niya gagawin iyon kung siya mismo ay may sariling kinatatakutan?

[MATURE CONTENT] Not suitable for young audience. R-18 Lumaking sunod sa luho si Adrianne Cueva. Lahat ng gusto niya ay nakukuha niya. Pero paano kung malaman niya na ang lahat ng tinatamasa niya pala ay hindi naman pala sa kaniya at sa mga magulang niya? Kundi sa isang taong hindi niya pa nakikilala. At sa pagtungtong niya ng labing-walong taon ay isang rebelasyon ang nagpaguho ng mundo niya. She was sold to be a billionare's wife. Siya ay bayad ng utang ng kaniyang mga magulang. Pero paano siya ngayon dahil tila wala itong balak na gawin siyang asawa, instead she will be a SLAVE, but not only an ordinary slave but His SEX SLAVE.