really dark humor jokes

"BRONZE WINNER IN GOODNOVEL CONTEST" CEO'S DIVORCED WIFE IS SEXY DOCTOR PART 1, CEO'S RUNAWAY BRIDE IS SEXY DOCTOR 2 <BLURB> "What are you doing? This is an hospital." I protested, though my body is doing the opposite. He slowly unbuttoned my shirt, "It doesn't matter doctor." His lips brushed past my ear, giving me the chills. I am under his command now. "You need to stop..." "Go ahead darling.." He whispered to my ear, "Strip. I'd like my body melting in yours now." Those words are enough to send me into another dimension. This is an hospital, but I don't care. His hands are going down my thighs, trying to pull my jeans down. I'm going let him screw me in the hospital... ••••••••••• All Damon Montreal needed to do was save his ex wife's baby which is also his but he refused to help her. She lost the baby thanks to that, but had the chance of getting another one... Bianca was fazed when her husband suddenly stopped loving her and changed towards her. She tried to see why but could not figure it out. He abandoned her even with her pregnancy. He made it clear he wanted nothing to do with her baby. Until she came back a few years later as his father's doctor. Then, he starts to desire her more than ever especially knowing she has a child for him. They start learning the truth of what happened between them years ago. Bianca is not willing to forgive him, what about a son who brings them together? Will Damon succeed in making her his again? Will he lose the chance just like he did before when an obstacle arrives?

Story of Rose and Josheph steamy love story with taste of betrayal, Suspense and thrill. "I was waiting for this moment Princess" He whispered in my ear giving goosebumps. "D..daddy" I stuttered. "shhhhhh.. baby, you trust me right?" He asked. Mature Content This is a work of fiction. Any names or characters, businesses or places, events or incidents, are fictitious. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental."

Standing against the corner of the wall, her entire drenched body was shivering, both in fear and cold. Her arms were tightly wrapped around herself. Her head was downcast. "Didn't I warn you not to step out of this house without my permission?" A shiver ran down her spine, hearing that intensely rugged voice questioning her. She didn't answer, not only just because she was a mute but also because she didn't know what to answer that person before her. Her shivering turned vigorous when she heard those heavy footsteps coming closer to her. That tall sinewy figure towered her. "You know what will I do to you if I have to repeat my fucking self again," She slowly took her head upward, hearing his threat. Her teary golden brown eyes met with his icy blue ones. His words immediately reminded her what he had done to her last night. Anger and hatred brimmed up in her watery eyes, and she didn't even need to use her words to tell him that. Her tears told him the intensity of her hatred towards him after what he had done to her last night. His jaw clenched. His nefarious gaze hooded. Grabbing her fragile neck with his brawny palm, he pushed her against the wall more and hovered her. "You consider me as a monster, don't you?" Hearing him whispering those words in her ear, her heart froze in terror, realising the worst things he was capable of doing to her. He gripped her neck tightly, causing a tear to slip down from her eyes. He leaned closer to her face, causing their noses to rub against each other. "Then tonight I will really become one for you and will torment this innocence of yours, Kaya Haiden……."

Amber Walker and her older brother, Jake , have an abusive father. One night her brother's bestfriend , Liam , sees her crying and climbs through her bedroom window to comfort her. That one action Sparks a love/hate relationship that spans for over eight years. What happens when Amber starting viewing Liam in a different way? What happens when her brother Jake , doesn't want whatever it is to hold on between them? Find out in the Darkest Night

After Selena was forced to leave Alpha Kian's kingdom for being his second chance mate she swore to never come back, leaving her family and friends behind. Without any other choice, she leaves the pack and has to survive on her own. With no pack or family to help her, she builds up her life. When fate one day interferes and she finds herself captured by the king's guards as an enemy and tossed in the castle's prison to be tortured. Can she escape without the King finding out his mate has come back to his kingdom, and keep her secrets hidden from him? When her life and the ones she cares about depend on her secrets. Is the King still the cold-hearted mate she once met a late night in the dark or has he changed?

The dominant, ruthless billionaire and a bold yet innocent girl, the opposite poles, are forced into a contract marriage of 1 year. There is only one mutual feeling between them i.e HATRED.What happens when these incompatible souls have to pretend to the outer world that they deeply love each other? Whether the love bloom or the hatred will take its toll? Whether they will realize that they are made for each other or just walk away after the contract ends? That's for you to find out :-) ---------Blurb--------- "If you want me to stay away from other men then you also have to stay away from other girls" the girl declares trying to set herself free from his iron grip. "Ok" she was a little taken aback by his agreement "But" the side of his lip twitched a bit "you have to fulfill all the duties of a wife" She gasps which catch his attention. The hand that was holding her throat moves up and his thumb starts stroking her lips, gently. "BE MINE" he avowed "Completely and dutifully" His words held power and firmness which tremble the girl lying under him, under his mercy. "Every night I want someone to f**k. If not other women then for the coming year, it is going to be you" there was no tint of humor in his voice "Shall we start from tonight? Wifey!" ---------------------------- (Story features Mature)

"I said you won't be working anymore." She smirked, "Watch me." Saying that she turned and I watched her till she walked out of the door.........................................The thirty-year-old billionaire bachelor Nicholas Carter isn't really fond of the word- love, owing to his past. What happens when he is arranged in marriage to the twenty-seven-year-old sweet and independent Sophia Jones who refuses to bow down in front of him and accept everything he throws her way unlike an usual arranged bride? Oh! Did I mention Nicholas Carter's five-year-old son?

This book one of my Shadow Warrior Series. Books two and three were previously posted on their own but have now been added onto the end of this one for a more cohesive reading experience! Thank you for reading. ... Ellie is an orphaned werewolf pup, kidnapped and held by an evil Alpha. Alpha Gunner, of the Blood Claw pack forced Ellie at just eight years old to swear a blood oath to mate his son Tyson, when they came of age. The Alpha's own thirst for conquering neighboring packs lands him in hot water with the council, a governing body made up of every type of supernatural creature that keeps the peace. The council additionally houses the Shadow Warriors, an equally diverse group of elites that police and fight those like Gunner who seek only to destroy. When Ellie catches a window of opportunity, she escapes and finds a friendly pack to take her in. However, Gunner will not let her go that easily, and gets increasingly desperate to find her. When all hope seems lost for Ellie, the Moon Goddess intervenes, and sends Ellie her warrior mates. Her mates quickly learn they cannot be with Ellie, as she is under a spell to keep her from shifting and getting her wolf for the first time.Can her mates free her from Gunner once and for all? Will Ellie ever learn the truth of who she really is and why Gunner wants her so bad? ... *This book is strictly intended for a mature audience and contains scenes of assault, violence and adult sexual content.*

UNDER HEAVY EDITING. ***** He chuckled at her desperate attempt to make the lie believable. "Pretty little liar, your face betrays a lot, sadly" he placed his hand on her cheeks, his face dark "you can't run from me, Maya; no matter how hard you try to, I'll always find you. Even in the deepest part of hell, And when I find you, you get punished according to how long you were away from me, understand?" His tone was so soft and gentle it could have fooled anybody but not her. She could see through him, and She trembled under his touch. "Y-yes, maestro" **** Though her sister commits the crime, Maya Alfredo is turned in by her parents to be punished by the Ruthless Don Damon Xavier for selling information about the Costa Nostra to the police. Her world is overturned and shattered; she is taken to the Don's Manor, where she is owned by him and treated like his plaything, meanwhile knowing his intentions to destroy her. But then things get dark in the Don's Manor, with the presence of Derinem Xavier. Maya doesn't stand a chance in Damon's furnace. Will he destroy her and everything she loves for the sins he thinks she committed? Or does luck have other plans for her? Note— This is a dark romance. Not all lovey-dovey. ML is a psychopath. Trigger warnings!!! **** TO READ THE EDITED VERSION, PLEASE LOG OUT AND LOG IN AGAIN.

Ashlynn Deters is a broken girl. Her home life was nonexistent when she was growing up. So when she was old enough she packed her bags and moved to New York. She's living there for five years and is working at a strip club, Divine. She's working her usual shift one night before she's kidnapped by a group of mysterious men. Gage Cutler is the leader of the New York Mafia. A woman has wronged his family and he'll stop at nothing to get his revenge. Yet, his ruthless behavior changes when his men kidnap the wrong girl.