pinoy humor jokes

Naniniwala si Pelipe na muli niyang makakapiling ang kaniyang minamahal, ang kaniyang nobya na si Maria pagkatapos nitong mamatay. Ngunit paano kung sa kanilang muling pagkikita ay hinde na sila magka-kilala at ang babaeng minahal niya sa nakaraan ay nag-iba na sa kasalukuyan. Sa nakaraan kung saan ang ala-ala ni Pelipe at ang mundo nila na nasa kasalukuyan. Paano nga ba nila haharapin ang katotohanan? muli nga ba nilang pagbibigyan ang pagmamahalan na naiwan sa nakaraan, o iiwasan nila na maulit ang masakit na kapalaran? Tunghayan ang kwento ng dalawang tao na pinaghiwalay ng nakaraan at muling pinagtagpo ng kasalukuyan.

Aileen Ramirez ay isang probinsyanang babae na napadpad sa siyudad ng ka-maynilaan dahil sa nangyaring hindi niya maipaliwanag. Nagtungo siya sa Maynila dahil sa isang oppurtunidad na sinabi ng kanyang tiyahin at para malimutan narin ang bangungot ng kanyang buhay. Dahil sa oppurtunidad na ito, nakilala niya si Dark Valentin at the very young age isa na itong multi-billionaire. A hot-tempered guy, handsome face, broad body and his attractive black orb at pasan ang mundo dahil laging nakakunot na noo. Para kay Aileen ay inahalintulad niya ito na isang naglalakad na poker face emoticon. Pero juice ko colored! Kahit ganoon ay makalalag panty naman ang kakisigan ng lalakeng ito. Kung ganoon, kaya niya kayang maabsorb ng kanyang loading na utak kung malalaman niya ang mala-aksyon star ang buhay nito?

"Life and Death are like green and red: you can't be both, but you can be neither. " Will you accept if you were given a chance to live forever? Or would you rather live with the fact that life ends with death? For Simon, there is no other choice than to live until everyone dies. All he wants is to be dead, but how?

Jika di tanya, "Apa cita-cita mu kelak?" Banyak yang akan menjawabnya dengan ingin menjadi polisi, dokter, guru, pengacara, pengusaha sukses dan lain sebagainya. Mungkin jawaban seperti itu selalu terdengar dari anak-anak yang mempunyai cita-cita luar biasa itu. Tapi lain dengan gadis bernama lengkap Tiara Aprilia. Gadis itu selalu mengatakan ingin menjadi pelacur setiap kali ada yang bertanya "Apa cita-cita mu? Atau saat besar nanti kamu ingin jadi apa?" Saat ia menginjak umur 25 tahun dirinya benar-benar terjun ke dunia malam untuk menuntaskan niatnya menjadi seorang pelacur. Tapi ia bukan sembarang pelacur yang menjual dirinya seperti pelacur-pelacur yang ada, melainkan ia ingin menuntaskan sebuah misi tersembunyi dengan bertopeng pelacur. Dan misinya itu lah yang membuat dirinya selalu mengatakan bahwa dirinya adalah seorang pelacur yang berkelas.

(Completed short novel)Imperfection is a story of two souls joined together through an arranged marriage. A marriage that was supposed to yield both forgiveness and strength. A marriage that hold a lot of strings to their past. One that helped them find their roots. It's a story of two couples, —two wounded souls who healed just right together.

Everywhere becomes silent as every single pair of eyes turn to us and although I'm used to attention, it's never been in this type of situation and I find myself wondering how to handle it. All worries fly out the window though when Hunter grabs my hand after locking his car. Murmurs erupt in every angle of the school ground at his actions and I glance at Hunter only to see a look of determination on his face. What is he up to? He suddenly turns me towards him and traps me against the car door. "You're right, we need to clear one misunderstanding" he states his breath fanning my face. "And what would that be?" I breath out already dazed by him. Get a grip Daisy, you're out in public! "That you are mine and all other boys can fuck off" He answers hoarsely just as he finally closes the space between us and takes my lips for a world-rocking kiss. ************* Daisy Heart is a friendly heiress with great friends who just wants to have a good high school experience. She thinks everything is beautiful except the heir to the Stone Empire: Hunter Stone. Hunter Stone is a playboy Heir who just wants to have a good time while young before responsibilities come knocking. He thinks everything is fun except the heiress to the Heart group of Hotels: Daisy Heart. After being forced into being partners and roommates for a school camp project, Hunter and Daisy are determined to make each other's life hell. The undeniable attraction between them certainly doesn't help. To make things worse, Hunter also knows that Daisy has feelings for his best friend. Sequel to series of fights, failed pranks and arguments, fate offers to deal a final blow to the situation. An arranged marriage.

"Tyler Wills broke my heart and now, he's back to pick up the pieces, but I built walls he can’t climb... or can he?" ——— Samantha Blake, a rising star in New York's design world, thought she left her broken past behind. But when a big lie messes up her life, she has to face Tyler Wills, the man she once loved and lost. As secrets come out and enemies show up, Samantha must deal with a mix of lies and desire. Will she find the strength to forgive and get her future back, or will the past ruin everything she cares about?

Vivienne Petrovna has an ordinary genius life in the Ultara Academy, but then something about her begins to change. A presence of a beautiful, yet mysterious girl comes into her school and insists on having her after she discovers one of life's biggest shocks. Going through a strange evolution called Awakening, Vivienne thinks it's the least of her trouble, until she's found out about her family secret and starts to realize the whole world is not what it seems. There are other predatory creatures living among humans- and worse, they want to destroy her.

After Noah's death, what greeted him was an AI system calling itself Black, offering him a job working for the World and Soul Management Bureau.  He has to travel to many different worlds, taking over an identity of some unfortunate soon-to-be-dead dude, and live out the remainder of his new life there however he wanted. Easy-peasy! ...Right? ...Ok, sure, there are a few small kinks here and there... like terrorist attacks, murder plots, zombie apocalypses, and the like... but one should always look at the bright side! Noah: "...Blackie, is it just me, or is this good brother of mine looking at me like a hungry wolf seeing a juicy piece of meat?" (°△°|||) Black: "Don't worry, host. He is just a bit excited due to nearly losing his life back there. You know, adrenaline." (¬‿¬) Noah: "…are you sure that's what's really going on here?" (っ °Д °;)っ Black: "Absolutely!" (≖‿≖) … ~ Many worlds later ~ Noah: "This secret mission that you can't tell me about… it can't possibly be to get fucked by the least appropriate target?!" (°ㅂ°╬) Black: "Of-of course not! Ho-how could that possibly be, eh?" (; ﾟ 3ﾟ )~♪ ML: Right, right, that's just a very (not so) coincidental bonus. Ψ(╹ڡ╹ )Ψ 💠 Author Note 💠 * SSC has long arcs. Each world is a fully-fledged novel on its own. * Don't let the summary (or the cover) fool you! While SSC does have an occasional explicit smut, it is primarily a fluffy and hilarious romance! * Pairings are one-on-one and taboo-ish. (E.g. hired assassin and his target, monster tamer and his tamed beast, master and disciple, siblings, brothers-in-law, etc.) * More info in the info chapter Author website: lucypandora.com Support the author on ko-fi: ko-fi.com/lucypandora Discord: lucypandora.com/discord

"No! Please" "Please, don't touch me down there, Jian Ying" I said to him with a rather high tone. He looked me straight in the eye with his hand still on my thigh and replied. "I like it there!" "You...you can't do that" I wriggled out of his hold and that got him angry. "You are my wife and every single part of your body is mine! Including...down there! So keep that mouth shut! Spread your legs wide for me and lie there!" He shouted at me with a serious expression. I had never seen anyone who was more shameless than him. "I'm not your wife yet Jian Ying and besides, I'm still young" I was perspiring all over. He smirked at me and said with his dominant voice. "Oh, yes you are!" "You are at the ripe age for it and besides, in a few days time, our marriage will commence. So, why wait?!" And before I knew it... "Ahhh....!" ____ Follow Chen Lijuan and Jian Ying to Love's web! A wet dream mate who becomes the lost betrothed wife! ***** Happy Reading Everyone! Please, stay safe. #For me and for all. Love from Author Elaami.