funny filipino jokes

Marco merupakan anak brandalan, yang hanya menghabiskan waktunya untuk beradu fisik. Bukan tanpa tujuan melainkan untuk mimpi. Alur cerita kehidupan Marco mulai terusik setelah bertemu dengan seorang gadis cantik secara kebetulan. Kehidupan Marco dan gadis cantik itu amat berbeda bagaikan langit dan kerak bumi. Marco hidup dilingkungan keras yang bernama Distrik Neraka yaitu tempat yang diasingkan oleh negara untuk menampung anak haram yang dibuang oleh orang tuanya sedangkan gadis cantik itu hidup di bawah naungan kota Avesta yang sangat maju dan semua fasilitas ada disana kehidupan disana begitu normal dan penuh dengan mimpi. Seperti apakah kelanjutan hidup si anak brandalan yaitu Marco setelah ia bertemu dengan gadis cantik itu?

#mutual contain 18+only "you should go to the other room" he said She looked at him in shock its there first night. He was nervous and open his mouth to say something. After a while, he said "your father makes a deal with me that if I marry you he will give me half of his property. My company is in loss and I don't want to marry you coz I am not interested in you, you are not my type.i feel disturbed when you are around me!" It is all he said to her. She got up from bed and a hot tear escape from eye and she left his room. She did not said a word to him. *************************** Roya knight-she is good. Age=22 educated and shy in nature. She is rich but she is also black in color. She never wear something so revealing. Simple and always smile. And she is tall, slim, perfect body, and her eyes is most attractive. She has every good thing but only lack of personality is her color. Johnson Robin - He is handsome. Every girl dream about him. He has well built body. He has blue eyes and white men. He is men of his word. Age=27. He run huge business and he has so many girlfriend. Content and /or trigger warning :This story contains mature sexual content. Strong language ahead, adult jokes also. Which may trigger for some readers. You have been warned

“You dare to think of another man in my presence?” The Alpha growled with a burning desire in his eyes. He glowered at Lavinia whose hands were tied. “What does that man have that I don’t? That filthy vampire, you think he’s going to save you?” His hands ran through her bare skin, sending shivers to her spine. “Please, leave me alone,” Lavinia begged in desperation. Tears welled up in her eyes. “Then be mine, Lavinia.” He leaned closer to her. His breath fanned her face. “I’ll make you the happiest woman alive.” Lavinia shook her head. She pursed her lips while watching the man in front of her. He may be a great man with power but her heart longed for someone else. “No. You’re not him… You’re not Sebastian.” "We had an unspoken deal: He gave me warmth, colors, and lies. In return, he asked for my blood when he's thirsty, my body when he's cold and my heart when he's bored. The funny part is, I still think it's quite a bargain." - Lavinia de Llava

Natalie Adams is not just a typical wolf. She is strong, brave, and beautiful. She has lived in the shadows for many years. She is soon going to be 18 years old and is now a senior at the Blue Moon Academy. She has never had a boyfriend and only has one friend named Evie. However, Natalie didn't realize that not just one Alpha but two desire her. Her Alpha, Christian Allen from the Starry Night Pack, wants her even if she is not his fated mate. He is determined to make her his chosen mate. Alpha Ivan Carter is from the Midnight Pack. He has had feelings for Natalie since they both started the academy years ago. He is determined to get close to her as they both begin their senior year, but Christian is hell-bent on making it impossible for him. Despite all this drama, Natalie has a past that she is unaware of. Ivan has a suspicion that there is more to Natalie than meets the eye. Her pack and others will slowly realize that Natalie is a warrior. Not even her bullies can handle her. Can Alpha Ivan dominate this energetic, bold, sexy she wolf? Read and see.

Alpha Kane imprisons Amy in his dungeon to soften her up for questioning after her brother, Jake, abducts his sister, Lisa. But she proves stubborn and he enslaves her, hoping this will make her more compliant. Kane is attracted to the dark-haired she-wolf from a rival pack, recently absorbed by his own, even though he has found his Luna and mate, Selene. But Amy is not what she seems, and the Alpha also has a hidden agenda. Working together to right a centuries old wrong, the pair begin to question everything they have been taught to believe. Will pack hierarchy ever be the same again?

Willa has been running for as long as she could remember along side her twin brother, West and her mother. Their Mother has always told them that a someone is after them. Life was difficult since their mother trained them to be ready for anything, even her death. Two years after their mom died, the twins luck has finally run out and they are captured but they are shocked to discover that it's their own father and brothers they've been running from. Now reunited, will the twins finally find happiness and family or will they end up being destroyed by their family's dark secret? With everyone hiding secrets, what is the truth? What is safe? The twins have only ever believed in their motto, Chaos not cash, maim not murder and each other. Can they trust anyone else and more importantly, should they?

"Remember the most important rule, don't get caught." *** I try to keep my expression neutral and give nothing away in my eyes, Eli is a smart man, smarter than he lets on and will know if something is different about me, "Everyone change, Eli, you definitely aren't the man you were when we first met, but the question is if the change is for the better or the worse." His hand reaches over the table and take mine in the gloves and though there is a barrier between our hands his touch is felt and the reaction sent to the rest of my body. "I love you, Anna and that's not going to change, but I have to admit that I like this side of you more. However, I am contented with whatever I get as long as I get to have you." These words are the words any woman wants to hear their man tell them and it is almost perfect to my ears... almost because I am not Anna...

[WARNING: This story contains mature themes with profanities, hardcore graphical explicit sexual situations, and others. Strongly recommended for 18+ only. Otherwise, read at your own risk.] Jack was still a child when his father abandoned him to Marianne, his lovely and caring stepmother. Through the good and bad times, they only have each other. But what if Jack suddenly admits that Marianne is the only person he wants to be with and love forever? A forbidden love that overflows like magma, so intense and hot that it burns with every touch. How will this kind of love survive in a world full of uncertainty, temptation, and mistakes? What if there are people who constantly try to keep them apart? Jack once told Marianne, "I don't give a damn about anyone. I want you to be mine! And it's fine with me if our love for each other burns me. Just want me and love me until the end, I am more than willing to be burned to death." Can their love last all the way to the end? NOTE: This is an English translation of a Tagalog story with the same title and author. The author wishes to apologize for any errors in vocabulary, spelling, phrases, or other translation issues found in this novel. In the future, this book will be further edited and polished to make it more suitable for English readers. For the time being, please enjoy it and don't forget to leave comments or feedback. Have fun reading! (The Tagalog/Filipino version is also available in this app).

"What about her?" Andre asked."Who?" I asked he motioned to a group of women specifically the one sitting down, I couldnt really see her because of the dim lights and the group of friends she had around her."No,""Why not?" Jason asked I took another sip before saying."She is sitting with her friends,""And?" Andre asked."Her friends are drunk,""And?" Jason asked confused."She is the only one with a beer and look at how she continuously checks her phone every five second,""And?""The beer isn't strong which means she is the designated driver her friends are drunk which means she has to leave soon, and the phone just shows that she would rather be anywhere but here, like she has much more important things to do. Which let's me know she probably won't give me the time of day because I'm not the most important thing in her life right now,""She is the one, she is the one you got to date"

Carla Simpson A CEO of a million-dollar company at age twenty. Her parents died when she was 12 years old. Kyler Jacobs a twenty-eight-year-old Billionaire falls in love with Carla at first sight. He arranges to be present at her meeting and what looked like intimate pictures of the couple went viral over the internet. Kyler’s mother fakes a heart attack to force him to marry Carla. The two fall in love, but many trials and tribulations come in between them will the couple survive, or will they call it quits?