All Chapters of Cries Behind Smiles: Chapter 1 - Chapter 10

I don't know how  long I stood there outside in verandah, away from the crowd of people.The cold wind kissing my face, reminding me back to reality. But still I can't get my head into clarity.Everything was blur. After having enough energy to walk, I move towards the corner of verandah. There he was....In the lap of grandmother who was trying to soothe him. He was crying hysterically. His beautiful black eyes  were pouring tears, his curled eyelashes were all wet from crying. His face holding hundreds of emotions that I can't understand.How could I forget him, my brother, "The Hero" HUSSNAIN!!!!! Mama used to say his name was an amalgam of Hassan and Hussain. The Prince of Jannah...His proud eyes were full of pain,doomness.His arrogant and cocky face was so broken. So vulnerable. It was totally unusual scenario because my brother was never weak. His face always show his cockiness, his intelligence. He was handsome and he knows it.It was always envio

Knotting my long hair into braid, I was getting ready for School.My hair had grown  long,they were jet black and thick.Everyone used to say I had inherited them from mamaThey were only thing that I take pride in.I was not really a morning person,So I was walking like a zombie who had not eaten food for months.But guess what my Baba was all chirpy and all that crap in morning.He used to sing something and interact with everybody.He rushed towards me asking me questionsThey used to call me Haya as nick.While my brother called me Servant,our maid,little witch and blacky which I really loved a lot because I don't give a shit anymore.It used to annoy the hell out of me.But with time I grew out of my insecurities and as I was growing I transformed from thin,bony girl to healthy curvy one and my complexion kept on getting better and better.I knew he just used these names to get a rise out of me and I intend to not give him this pleasure.But with time I used

It was afternoon,everyone was busy in usual cores.I was having Winter Vacations.Chachaa and Chachii  were meeting some relatives in Murree.Ayesha api was snoring beside me.Bear-bro aka hussni went to meet his one of friends.After waking up,I was using my not-so-smart-brain for taking revenge.Speak of devil and he is here....Chocolate eyes was sleeping with mouth open,little drool was on side of his mouth.He looked like he is dead.I could kill him at the moment andend of game.As I looked at him ,I realized he looks like old Amaar with his smirk off his face.I almost wanted to touch him like the old times that I always used to awake him for breakfast.I immediately jerked that thought out of my mind.He is not the same Amaar and you are not a baby anymore.So seize your stupid acts right now.But then I caught sight of his phone.Wiggling my fingers,I rushed towards it.He didn't budge.What a heavy sleeper.I move out of room towards the sid

As exams drew near, I got busy in studying.You know exams are always a pain in the ass or its what I've thought.Because their is tension squeezing your insides whether you're prepared or not,Its still there.So our mind don't wander anywhere because their is a time bomb ticking in your brain,waiting to explode at anytime.I hate them yet I survived.Now they're over.The best feeling is when they're over.You know like a huge boulder has been removed from my shoulders.So we enjoyed the last day by roaming in college.Roaming is really my thing.I like to be free of bounds.As my lifestyle due to absence of my mother, I'm answerable to none.Baba don't pay much attention to where I'm going,what I'm doing unless I'm not causing trouble.Same goes with my brother.So there are perks of my life.I don't know I would like to have some loving ties than no hindrance.But this what circumstances have made me to.I didn't chose what

"They say I'm wild, they're right because I possess untamed spirits"Like the summer wind rushing through the beach, my life was going and moving.I was hell busy in my studies.Let me tell you I was always bright student.I took part in every competition.I don't know a part of me craves for attention and affection.Today my sister got 1st position in speech.Everybody was celebrating like we got Ferrari.No offence I just love Ferrari.That red colour is so hotMy mom was gloating like a king who got his throne.Baba made a video of her.I wasn't envious of her.No I was just mad at the irony.When I used to do these things.When I used to come up with medal ,no one bothers except Chachu.He always appreciated me.He was my small beacon of life in my world of darkness.****FLASHBACK*****I won the great competition of quiz in school.I got a big prize.I was so happy.Everyone came even the students other than my class fellows congratulated