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Chapter Twenty-Three
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2024-10-29 19:42:56Sam
It takes me a second to react as the bedroom door slams closed, and then I’m running after Theo. I’m not above running after him, and I don’t really care about what set him off, but I don’t want to see him cry like this because of me.
I am disoriented in the dark, running through hallway after hallway until I reach the main stairs. It doesn’t matter that we’re being noisy, stomping down the stairs and slamming doors.
I notice as I’m running out that Muppet’s walking and sniffing around, probably confused about the racket and strange setting. I barely manage to close the door after me so he doesn’t escape. By the time I’m out the front door, Theo is already outside, near his car.
“Theo,” I call out to him.
His hair is dripping water down his neck. He doesn’t look up. I try again, this time when I’m nearer, “Theo.”
“What? Ple
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Theo I didn’t know how bad my anxiety was until Sam came along. Logically, I knew my attacks of worrying and pacing around the house weren’t normal, but I didn’t know how much they affected me until now. Last week, we were lying in bed, and it was late. I couldn’t sleep and was staring at the ceiling, my heart racing wildly when he caressed my cheek. “You’re anxious. I can practically hear your brain going now. Like an old laptop,” He whispered in the dark. I threw both hands over my face and laughed at his description. This beautiful man. “Jesus Christ. I am, all the time. I think about every single thing that could go wrong about basically everything and anything in my life.” He removed my hands gently from my face and replaced them with his, forcing me to look at him. He was sitting up, scanning my face. I could barely see his eyes, but I
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Sam Andrea asked Theo if she could come to witness the whole thing. I casually mentioned it over breakfast one day and her eyes lit up. She said she loves these kinds of ceremonies. It didn’t take long for his doctorate to become a frequent topic of conversation between them. They’re mad about academia in general, so that’s something else they have in common, besides their music and literature taste. They spend hours talking about their favourite Shakespeare analogies and the hidden meaning behind Ana Karenina while I get dinner ready on the times she and Jack come over. He once fell asleep on the sofa. That’s how bored he was with their whole conversation. That makes things easy for me, though. because I can simply ask her for recommendations to surprise Theo. It’s all pretty fucking great, to be honest. I made the suggestion sheepishly. I didn’t know if he’d be down for it with all his anxiety, but he was over the moon to be asked that. She helped him p
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TheoI close the door behind us, Sam turns and looks at me with a guilty grin, like he’s hiding a giant secret. “Wait here. Just for a sec,”I shrug, a habit I’ve picked up from him. I was never one for giving noncommittal answers, but now I’m all for it. Saves you a lot of anxiety. He runs inside, and I use this moment to sort myself out.I take my shoes off, drop my keys on the foyer table and head to the kitchen and pour myself a tall glass of water. It’s delicious in my throat, just the right kind of cold, and for a moment it feels like I’m coming home alone, back in my previous single status. I’m still thinking about that when his footsteps approach, and then he’s here. He’s holding a giant daffodil bouquet.It’s so lovely. My eyes are starting to water as he approaches me. I hear my voice cracking as I say, “Sam,”
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Sam’s stumbling around the room wakes me up. I roll over and tuck my hands between my thighs. Now that he’s opened the door to his bedroom, it’s so cold. I glance at his old alarm clock on the nightstand and I barely make out the time: 6:35 a.m. I groan and throw my arm over my eyes. I don’t really know how he does it. By this time, before leaving for work, he has already showered, eaten breakfast and is all bouncy, smelling of his fresh cologne. Meanwhile, I’m losing the battle against sleep. I feel him kissing me good morning, a soft, gentle kiss that’s borderline sexy, but I grin against his lips anyway. “Bye.” I mumble. He kisses my cheek as a reply and I resist the urge to pull him back into bed. His breath smells like coffee and it instantly makes me crave a nice, sweet latte, not the ghastly instant stuff Simon likes to drink. Maybe later I’ll drop by the coffee shop downtown. It’s not like I have much planned. He tosses his house keys at
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Sam Goodbye day is somehow less dramatic than last time. It's just as heartbreaking for me, though. Mostly, we were rushing to get him to the airport on time. He packed while I took the trash out and made sure his flat was nice and tidy for when he comes back next. I don't think getting back to an empty, filthy flat would feel great after months away, so I dodidmy best with the little time we have. He thanked me by snogging me against the door and offering me the keys if I wanted to stay here while he was away, and I batted them away laughing. "Just trying, you know?" He said with his palms up as he landed another big kiss on my mouth. I raised an eyebrow before pecking his cheek, "Like you don't know me." We spent Sunday morning walking around the park, and then when the sun started showing, we went home for a slow fuck and then he was en route to the airport. There's something about him that's odd, I can't tell what it is. He talks the same amount as before, he looks at me and
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