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30. Guilt Filled Bedroom
Last Updated:
2025-01-07 10:08:15
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When Regret Isn't Enough 31. The Storm
Good morning, Miss Olivia;I wanted to wake you and thank you in person for being the perfect roommate. But you slept so peacefully that I didn't want to disturb you. I had a wonderful time despite the inconvenient circumstances that brought us together. I want to thank you for all your kindness. It's still freezing, so wrap up warmly when you get ready to leave. Here's my phone number: (010) 213-7880. Give me a call as soon as you can. Please don't think I'm referring to the $200.00. I trust you already, remember. Collin Halston. Take care, and I hope to hear from you soon, maybe over a cup of coffee one day.******Collin reflects on what happened. When awake, he felt cold air fill the room. Daylight found its way through a slant in the drapes at the window. The line of daylight beams on my face caused me to begin to stir awake. "Something else was right on my face," he heard a soft voice say. “Why are you in my bed?” She asked breathlessly.“No...this is my bed,” I responded, no
Last Updated : 2025-01-07When Regret Isn't Enough 32. A Private Storm
Amanza stirred as the temperature dropped even further as the night went on. While still sleeping, she felt chilled to the bone. She had no idea how long she had been sleeping in the cold cabin until she suddenly awakened! Her eyes popped open as she heard a strange roaring sound. She sat up, looking around. Amanza realized there was no Holland. Fear immediately overcame her because she was almost sure she had heard something.Listening carefully, only to be reminded of the blizzard outside, pounding in its fearsome but quiet way. She realizes it isn't anything but the storm itself until you hear the strong stormy gust of powerful winds. But she wondered where did Holland go. ‘Maybe he went to sleep in the bedroom.’But strange noises could be heard, which wasn’t like any sound she had ever experienced. ‘So this is what it's like being in a blizzard!’ Amanza, with rattled nerves, curls back up on the sofa, wrapping her arms tightly around one of the pillows. It gave her a sense of sec
Last Updated : 2025-01-08When Regret Isn't Enough 33. Flames & Blazing Fire
She immediately reached down and embraced him, embracing him as he lay on her front porch in the snow! Half of his body was sprawled out on the porch, and the other half was partially over the door sill. Tears poured out of Amanza's eyes like pools of water as she held herself close to him.The snow and strong winds met her face, pelting it with tiny ice as she came to reality. She quickly rose off of Hand. “Can you get up?”Holland's lifeless attempts to lift his head were the result of him being too weak, so he let it fall back weakly into the pile of snow.“No! No! Please, Holland, you gotta get up! Please try to help me get you inside.”She pushed him upright by his shoulders and back with all her might, asking him, “Can you stand?”He doesn't utter a word; he just struggles to stand up. His face is frozen, his lips pale, shrunken, and chapped. His lashes and eyebrows are covered with hard ice, and his cheeks are red.“Put your arm around my shoulders. Come on, come this way.”She
Last Updated : 2025-01-08When Regret Isn't Enough 34. The Closer I Get To You
Amanza sat there in this unintended place, time, and position, gazing at every inch of him. His intense magnetic pull caused her to vocalize her emotions and attraction to him willingly. Holland's bare flesh drew her closer to lhim as she lean against him and whispers in his ear, "Holland, is it possible that I still love you? What are these feelings?”Only the light from the fireplace shown on his beautiful upper body and gave off an amber glow. He looked so appealing and appetizing. Amanza could not withhold the emotions or tears from falling at the thought that she could have almost lost him. Getting a grip on herself, wiping her tears.She undressed him, wrapping his neck in a dry, warm towel. He was exhausted! Holland had not opened his eyes once since entering the house. Removing her leg from around him, she realized that she had to remove those wet pants."How do I get these wet pants off?" Hesitating and hesitating to touch them.Amanza convinces herself to be brave. 'After a
Last Updated : 2025-01-09When Regret Isn't Enough 35. A Delicious Body
He was lying on his stomach with his head and one arm wrapped over her thighs and the other arm wrapped around her waist and back. His face was under her sweater, pressed against her bare stomach, seeking warmth from her flesh.Realizing this, Amanza feels currents of fire blaze through her body, waking dormant parts and beaming them to life! Unpredictably, she moans lightly. Holland makes no sounds other than light breathing. She looks down at him, unknowingly awakening thoughts of their past times. His hand is now under her cashmere sweater, touching her bare skin again. Amanza breathes in profoundly, trying to contain the ignition in her core. She says, "He's sleeping and has no idea what's happening."A few minutes pass, and she can feel him changing his position again. He was like a child in his mother's lap, trying to find warmth and comfort. He turns on his side, placing his hands securely on both sides of her hips around to her backside.His other arm is positioned around the
Last Updated : 2025-01-09When Regret Isn't Enough 36. We Have A Past
Amanza stood in the doorway, watching him prepare the food. The delicious smell of breakfast filled the cabin. She couldn't wait to taste what he had prepared. He intently watched the food as he stirred and flipped the eggs while calmly telling her what he needed next:“Baby, I need our plates.”Hearing him call her baby initially felt odd and uncomfortable, but Amanza decided to relax and enjoy the moment. It made her think about what their marriage should have felt like. She permitted herself to smile inside whenever he called her baby and promptly responded, “Coming right up!”They sit in front of the fireplace and eat breakfast together, stealing glances at one another. Amanza struggles with all her mixed feelings.“Holland.........either this is tasty, or I'm starving."He slides closer to her, his knees touching hers. With each bite she takes, he smiles. Holland enjoys the movement of her mouth.“I'm never going to be able to finish my food if you are going to stare at me like th
Last Updated : 2025-01-10When Regret Isn't Enough 37. Let's Go Deeper
Holland's arm came around her without any reservations as he held her head to his shoulder, the way a small child is comforted. Holland held her in his arms until her sobs weakened and slowed. The way a thunderstorm fades away on a summer day. Tears, like rain, still fell, but the power of her fears was relieved.Amanza uttered. “I know you have a kind heart, Holland. I’m just sad it took all of this for me to see this side of you again. But I want to thank you for making such a willing sacrifice to help me. All I could think about now was that you didn’t return. It frightens me to death even now. Thank goodness you made it back to me.”Sniffling as the tears drop. Holland takes her in his arms, pulling Amanza closer and hugging her tightly. He softly says in her ear. “I know, I felt the same way. I was so worried about possibly freezing to death all alone. I couldn’t fail you again since I was in our marriage. But I promise you, I'm here now, and we're together.”Holland's hand cares
Last Updated : 2025-01-10When Regret Isn't Enough 38. What You Deserve
“How can you say that? The very reason we are divorced is because you let Susie interfere in our marriage and life. And now she's having your baby. What a month for now! Holland, it sounds like the cycle has been repeated. If you think about it, isn't that how Collin came along?"Holland hung his head."You are right, Holland; apples don’t fall far from the tree. You're exhibit A,” Amanza stated, staring at him.Holland shook his head no, feeling ashamed. For the first time, his eyes were opened in a way that had never been before. He never thought deeply about what had occurred and that his father was equally at fault for demolishing his happy childhood. He felt awful about allowing the same thing to happen again in his marriage to Amanza."Amanza..." He took her hand, holding it tight. Holland was grateful she didn't pull away. "Honestly, I never gave it a thought. I feel so embarrassed that I allowed this to happen again."Holland knew any sane man would want Amanza as their wife, a
Last Updated : 2025-01-11
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When Regret Isn't Enough 94. The Phone Call
"I...I...I, please get up from there, Mr. Halston." Mr. Reid said as he came from around his desk to help Collin stand up straight as he saw the tears in his eyes. "I still want to talk to your parents, and only then can I feel comfortable giving you my approval." Collin says humbly, "Yes sir... I'll call them now."Collin knew this plot he and Olivia had devised was thickening. But it was too late to turn back, so they kept up the charade so that Olivia's parents would accept him. But there was no way Collin could call his birth father, Mr. Halston, whom he doesn't even speak to and who doesn't acknowledge him as his son. Indeed, it would all blow up in their faces if he did that. In this desperate moment, he could only call one person: Amanza's father, Clinton, who has always treated him like a son. Collin prayed that Mr. Clinton wouldn't blow his cover by telling Olivia's parents he was not his biological father. After Mr. Reid helped Collin stand up from bowing before him, he w
When Regret Isn't Enough 93. Please Give Me A Chance
Collin takes Olivia by the hands. "No! Never! What I'm saying, I was wrong. I've fallen in love with you.""I've fallen in love with you."Collin reached up, stroked a finger down her cheek, and lowered his head. He hovered close enough for their breath to mingle. Just as he was about to touch his mouth to hers, Evie and her husband walked up. "Olivia, sweetie, your big Sis. is about to leave for her honeymoon." Olivia and Collin quickly stood up, looking slightly embarrassed. "I think you two better put a hold on that. Marvin is still in the running for that hand in marriage." "Stop it, honey. Olivia, Daddy will straighten this out for you in the morning. And make sure to listen, okay? Listen with your heart, Olivia. Promise me." "I promise.""Don't rush into nothing. Marvin isn't perfect, but he understands you and your people.""Evie, I know that...but Collin understands more than you know." "Well, honey, I'm going.""Have a good time, you two." Olivia and Evie hug one another.
When Regret Isn't Enough 92. Pretending Not To Be Married
“Oh sure, have a seat.”Olivia was still somewhat shocked as he sat down next to her. He was precise, what she remembered, sincere looking and honest. Without all the arrogance, with that strikingly handsome face, so unlike many men, including Marvin Peck, who is attractive but overly confident and self-assured.They both went to try to speak at the same time. "You go first," Olivia says."In short, I want to apologize for the way I left things. That morning, when I left, I did intend to call you. But reality hit me, and I didn't know how to deal with everything." "What is everything? I asked you if you were in a serious relationship. And Collin, you told me no." "My parents and environment want me to follow all this culture and customs. It has us divided and confused about what we should and should not like and love. But I no longer want to be confused and caught up in those ideas and views. And I know, being with someone like you and you being with someone like me, it's not going
When Regret Isn't Enough 91. Let's Talk Son
The MC announces it's time for the reception to get underway. The light in the green room is dimmed into a very romantic setting. Everything was beautifully done, and the weather was perfect for a traditional Jamaican garden reception! The large green room that held about 300 guests smelled of good Jamaican food that even floated to the outside driveway. Collin saw the lights low as the music blared so loudly that his whole body vibrated with the beat. He smiles, looks around, and stays seated, watching Olivia's family and friends interact."Wow! The Jamaicans really know how to throw a party. And I never knew there were so many beautiful black women. This is amazing!" Collin thinks, smiling. The dance floor quickly fills up with guests ready to dance! Collin patiently waits for Olivia to return, but before she does. This attractive lady with a beautiful figure for her age, wearing a teal green fitted dress and a hat, approaches him and sits. It's Olivia's mother, she been full of
When Regret Isn't Enough 90. Who Is This Man
The Reid household was in a cheerful mood this afternoon. Fresh flowers were ushered inside by several florist trucks that just pulled into the long driveway. Today was an amazing and eventful day! One of the Reid girls was getting married this afternoon. Miss Reid is married to a wealthy Jamaican man who has been a long-time friend of the Reid family. According to custom, the oldest daughter should be married first. Now that the Reids have accomplished that, Mr. Reid is so happy he's about to get his eldest daughter married today, and now he can focus his attention on his next beautiful daughter.That would be fine if this daughter were certain she wanted to follow the traditions of marrying a Jamaican even though her first experience with a foreign man left her hurt and feeling used. She forced herself to put being in love again far from her mind. She still wasn't sure if the traditional route was what she wanted to take. Even though Jamaican parents aren't sticklers for arranged m
When Regret Isn't Enough 89. Meeting Olivia's Family
“Where do I start? This is hard. I didn't know how or when to break this news to you.”“What is it, Collin?” Amanza asked.“Amanza, me and Oliva got married.” “Really! Oh, Collin, I'm so happy!” She said, getting up and hugging him. “Why didn’t you bring Olivia with you?”“She’s on a business trip, and I have to pick her up a couple of hours from the airport today. But I thought we should talk alone, and I wanted to apologize for going off at your wedding.” “Thank you for apologizing. But I’m so happy for you two.” “Well, from the first time I met Olivia, I have been crushing on her. Besides, I didn't want to get caught sneaking around. So I thought it was best I say something to you especially. But I can't help myself. I love Olivia so much, and I miss her right now. “Ah, I’m so very happy.” “But I feel bad about ruining your wedding. But I don’t trust my brother, and I don’t want to see you hurt.”“I’m going to be fine, and it doesn't matter to me, as long as you and Olivia an
When Regret Isn't Enough 88. Why Collin?
Holland smiled at Amanza this evening, so happy that all that had happened was now behind them. “Baby, you sure are looking good this evening.” He stated, watching Amanza get dressed.Amanza POVI knew he had been standing there the whole time as I slipped my feet into my 5-inch pumps and fixed my pencil skirt and silk blouse before putting on my black fitted coat and matching hat. I smiled as Holland continued to eye me."Wow, you look beautiful, what's the occasion?" Holland's natural reaction was to hug me. But it wasn't just any kind of hug. Instead, I got a big bear hug that lifted me off my feet into his muscular arms."Where are you going? Should I let you go?""Yes...I'm going somewhere very important. I shall return, and then I will be all yours."I barely squeaked out the last few words before Holland set me down, planting a kiss on my lips that I had no time for but couldn't resist. That's when I heard a car horn honk outside. I looked up, shimming myself free from Holland
When Regret Isn't Enough 87. You Have A Right To Fight
Amanza PovOnce I was home. I let the phone ring for a solid minute. Then, when I got no answer, I immediately sent a text.Holland, I know you will see this text since you refused to answer my calls.But you will ignore it because you think I will understand your care for the weak and naive Susie.Soon, you'll learn that you are mistaken. Amanza Ended the Text.I promised myself I wasn't going to cry. Tears didn't help. They had never helped in the past, and they sure weren't going to help now.Nothing would help but get justice. But, like serrated blades, the memories of what has happened in such a public way. He has sliced into me and tore at me. Had I been so naive that Holland would never return to Susie? And how very wrong I'd been.Weary and broken, I lay in my bed, reflecting on all the pain that has filled my heart."God didn't create fools. Fools are something you let others make of you."I have to free myself from all the games and free myself from all the pain. I'm so tired
When Regret Isn't Enough 86. Shock and Awe
Amanza smiled and said. "Yes, I'm ready even though this day has been like a dream, dad. I don't know how to describe it."Amanza's father smiled and said. "Holland seems to have come to his senses; your mother and I are happy for the both of you."They continue to walk. Amanza felt this overwhelming nervousness and excitement come over her. It was a good thing her father held her arm tightly. Amanza didn't know Holland would go this far to prove his devotion and love for her. It wasn't expected. It just keeps getting better and better.All eyes were on her again. "Dad, thank you for everything you've done for me. I love you and mom dearly. I'm so happy you got to be a part of my wedding this time."Her father smiled back and said. "We're always here for you. I will always be with you like I am today. Ready to support you if you need me to. But I'm confident Holland will take good care of you. Look, we both are getting emotional."Amanza's father opened the door. He stepped out first a
