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Anxiety
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2024-10-29 19:42:56I waited for her call from jail for hours. I sat in my room, staring down at my phone, anxiety crippling me. I was scared sh*tless. What in the hell would I do without her? How long was she going to be in jail? What she did was stupid, but would she be there long? It was her property. Did she do something else that would make her stay longer? I looked up her name on the jail's database over and over again, refreshing every few minutes to see everything she was being charged with and nothing popped up.
Finally, at about three in the morning, I got the call from the jail and answered it immediately. "Kelly. Get me the f*ck out of here! I can't stay in here. Post my bail. My purse is hidden under the clothes in my closet by the shoes. I need a f*cking cigarette." "What did you do?" "I don't need stupid questions right now. Just bail me out and come pick me up." "How do I do that?" "God, why did IRelated chapters
Unapologetically Me Lunch
By the time lunchtime rolled around, I was dead on my feet. Chloe tried asking me what was wrong but everything was so embarrassing to even tell her so I just told her that I stayed up late doing homework and left it at that. Usually, for lunch, I would go out with Chloe, but since she thought I had ditched this morning, she had made lunch plans with her boyfriend, so I was stuck at school. I walked to my locker because I knew I hadn't brought money to buy any lunch put my books away and then wandered down the halls to pass the time. I had no idea what to do when I didn't go out for lunch. It hardly ever happened. If I had my car here, I would have sat in my car but that was ruined. I could have brought my mom's Range Rover, but I didn't want to piss her off more. I needed to get the money out of her purse before she got out though. Now that I knew where she had hidden it, I could get in there and start paying our bills. I thought about
Unapologetically Me Uncle
The next morning I woke up and walked to my mom's bedroom. I don't know what I had expected to see, but when I found it exactly how it had been the day before I felt a twinge in my chest. I got dressed for school even if I felt like didn't want to go and texted James that I was going to take my mom's Range Rover to school instead of hitching a ride with him. I decided that it would be for the best in case I felt like complete crap like I did the day before then I could escape without witnesses. When I got to school I sat in my car and waited. The back still smelled pretty rank, but it beat having to go in. My dance coach had come up to me the day before and asked if I was going to make auditions after school. I missed them yesterday because of the crisis with Mom, but after seeing the bank account last night, I figured it couldn't hurt to do one thing I wanted. I hoped she would still let me audition even though I would be a day late. Dan
Unapologetically Me Halloween Shopping
They stayed the night that night, staying in the guest room, and in the morning I waved them goodbye. My uncle had sent the Porsche to be fixed and told me he would be taking over the car and payments. I agreed that it would be good to take some of the payments off of my shoulders. I would miss the car, but I would be okay. After they left I laid in bed for a bit longer until lunchtime and then called Chloe to come over. When she was busy, I called James. He was out trying to find a costume before Halloween with Michael, so I joined them in their search. Despite feeling crappy about my mom being in jail, I felt like it could be a good thing for her sobriety. So I was trying to be positive. While the guys tried finding Halloween costumes at the Halloween store, I walked around. I figured I would stay in that night. Dad always sat on the front porch in full costume and handed out candy to all of the kids. To honor him, I decided that I wou
Unapologetically Me Halloween
Children walked around everywhere, dressed in various costumes, grinning and laughing as they walked up to my doorway. I stood uncomfortably in my Elsa dress, my hair braided off to the side. I smiled brightly at the kids and their parents as they grabbed fistfuls of candy from the bowl I had set up. Children hugged my legs and stared up at me in wonder as their parents complimented me on my costume. I grinned at each of them and gave them candy and hugs back, but the entire time I thought of my dad. I thought of how happy he would have been if I had ever just taken the time to hand out candy to him. I wish I had done it more often. Sure, the dress was itchy, but the kids all loved it and I loved seeing their excited faces when they looked at me. I was busily handing out candy for a few hours already, happy that I had thought ahead and bought a sh*t ton the night before when some familiar faces popped up. One was a tiny pr
Unapologetically Me Shopping
I walked mindlessly through the aisles, picking up things that looked interesting and just perusing so that I didn't have to go home. My phone tinkled in my purse and I stilled. Whether it was Chloe or not, I didn't want to hear the re hash of what had happened at the party. But I seemed to be a masochist this morning anyways, so I answered the call without looking. "Hello?" "Hey!" Hearing his voice I felt my jaw clench and I stopped strolling. "Oh, hey James. What's up?" "Just calling to see what you're up to. My mom told me she took the little kids over to see you." I smiled at the memory and nodded. "Yep. They were cute." "Yeah. So what are you up to?" "Shopping. Toilet paper and all of the fun stuff." "Trader Joe's?" "Yeah." "You mind if I join you?" I rubbed my face and shrugged. "Okay." I sighed. "
Unapologetically Me Dance and Signs
Dance was the only thing getting me through. I worked my a*s off for the next few weeks, getting the routines down and traveling to our first meet in Texas. The hardest part of the meet was not having my dad cheering me on in the stands. He had always been so supportive of anything I did. He would practice cheer routines and perform them in the stands while he watched me proudly. He loved football, but he always made the games just for me. On dance competitions, he made sure to take the two full days off, even if he had important meetings, and would cheer me on in everything. Another thing that sucked was the nerves that I would get before a meet. I guess with my dad being absent, my anxiety had kicked up and I found myself vomiting right before the meet. Even in practice, I would be good one second and then all of a sudden I felt my whole body begin trying to dispel any single parcel of food I had tried to digest. Des
Unapologetically Me Avoiding
The next day I tried to focus on classes and doubly avoided James. It wasn't hard when I had already been doing it for two weeks, but even when he smiled at me, I turned away without a smile back. During class, he tried again and I studiously ignored him. I couldn't let him in. If he found out, there was no telling what he would want to do with the information. During class, I got a text from him asking me what was wrong. I ignored it and proceeded to block his number. After he realized I had blocked him he turned around during Danforth's lecture with his eyebrows furrowed. I continued to ignore him and he only turned away when Ms. Danforth called his name and told him to pay attention. After class, he followed me to my locker but before he could say a word to me, Pink Streak came out of nowhere and hugged him. He continued to try to get near me by removing her from his arms but I was able to move q
Unapologetically Me Ultrasound
Chole held onto my hand tightly and jiggled her knees as we waited in the back room for the nurse to come back with the results. I was already sure that I was pregnant, but for some reason, I couldn't get rid of the hope that all of those pee sticks pregnancy tests had been faulty. The nurse came in holding a clipboard and a cherry smile. "Alright, Miss Whitmore, we got back your results. They came back positive. From the information you gave us, we estimate that you are approximately ten weeks along. After scans, we can be more precise." "Do we have to do scans?" I asked her nervously. "To be more accurate about how far along you are, we would need to get pictures." I took a deep breath and nodded. Okay. I knew this would happen. I turned to Chloe and she pressed her lips together and sighed. "Okay, so can you talk us through her options afterward?" "Yes. I
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Unapologetically Me Making a home
I have found myself to be more relaxed than I have ever been before and it all has to do with Liam. I go to school and because my schedule for work is so different now, I actually have time to study. I have lunches with him almost every day and when I'm off and he comes home, I'm deliriously happy.It feels almost too good to be true, which is the scariest part. I feel like here lately I've been too happy and something sh*tty is about to come around the corner and bite me in the ass. And I wait for it. I may be comfortable, but it doesn't mean that I'm not waiting for my happiness to turn to ashes in my mouth.Until then, I'm enjoying just being with him. When his stuff arrives from Boston I unpack most of it while he's at work after school. I hang up his expensive looking suits and fill the bathroom vanity with all of his toiletries. I'm happy seeing my space being shared by someone I care about. I'm excited and also scared of the future that is coming o
Unapologetically Me Job Interview
LiamIt's done. Everything to do with my parents and my old life is finished. I'm home. It's exactly how it feels, laying next to a sleeping Kelly, watching her chest rise and fall underneath her sheets.I have an important interview in the morning, but I'm too wired to sleep. I had been at the airport when I had talked to Kelly before she went to work and although I was tired as hell, especially after ravaging my beautiful woman, I couldn't sleep.Seeing her walk into the club in the lacy lingerie had me wired. She was sexy as hell, I knew that, but seeing her in action at work, even before I paid for six dances, there was no denying that she was a goddess. I smile at the memory of her shoving my money back in my hand as soon as we get home. "I didn't dance for you, so you take it back." "I don't care, Kelly. Keep it. It's from your job.""Ew. No. It makes me feel icky if you pay for me to do stuff for you. I like giving it to
Unapologetically Me Staying
Leaving Liam this time was hard. We were so close now, closer than ever to not have to do this anymore. But I ugly cried in the SUV when it was time to say goodbye. I mean, snot and tears and everything. It was bad. And Liam, who was usually so put together and happy go lucky teared up as well."It's okay, Kel. I'll be there soon. I've got some loose ends to tie up, but don't worry. I'll be in Vegas before you know it. I promise."And so I got on my plane alone and went back home. I started getting ready for Liam's arrival as soon as I did. I would go to class and instead of hitting the gym, I started organizing my closet and taking clothes and shoes out to donate. I made drawer space and cleaned out my spare bedroom to give him a special surprise.I ordered some office furniture so that if he wanted to, he could work from home as soon as he found himself something here. Did I tell him about it?No. I was afraid that if I did, he would tell me I was doing too much but I was just excit
Unapologetically Me Christmas Aftermath
Liam and I sat on the floor of his apartment with our gifts in front of us. After our laughing fit in the car, we came inside and neither of us really knew what to say or do.I felt guilty as hell for everything that happened at his parents house. I felt selfish because I didn't want to let him go and I felt responsible for him losing his job and his family. I just...I didn't feel good at all. I mean, I loved that he defended me. It made me feel..I felt loved. I felt like someone really cared for me and it felt like for the first time ever that I was chosen first.But of course, I felt guilty for wanting to be first. I chose my mom over James. Even when she was a raging b*tch, I still chose her. I wanted to choose James, but I didn't. Liam chose me. He chose me. I had no idea why. I mean, yeah, we were together, but...he was losing a lot. He didn't even have a job. He didn't have his parents anymore and it was all my fault. I stared down at my g
Unapologetically Me Christmas
We went last-minute Christmas shopping. Despite me being here, his parents still wanted me over for Christmas because Liam flat-out refused to join them if I couldn't go, which made me feel amazing. Not.So even though I bought Lillian a cashmere sweater, I still had to buy it for his dad even though Liam kept telling me I didn't have to. I didn't care if they got me anything or not. I half expected to get sh*t in a box, courtesy of his mother, but it was okay. I would accept it gracefully, just to piss her off.And it wasn't like I was aiming to piss them off. I just wasn't going to give in to their bullsh*t wishes.On Christmas Eve we had dinner with his friends and had a white elephant gift party which was pretty fun. I enjoyed my time there, even though Vivian was there. She avoided talking to either of us the whole time which suited me perfectly. I even drank a little because I was feeling the holiday spirit. I came home with a cute set of Tiffany earrings because these rich peop
Unapologetically Me Walk of Shame
When we step off of the elevator I feel almost a permanent blush up my neck and cheeks. I'm not sorry for what we did but Vivian saw and from past experiences, she wasn't very good at keeping her trap shut.I walk into the event center with my arm in Liam's and thank God no one is really paying attention to us. Some people glance at us, but it seems like the drinks have been flowing and people are talking loud and gesturing with their hands. So that's a good sign.I look around and see Vivian sitting at a table with a drink in her hand looking forlorn and I smirk to myself. Serves her right for coming and looking for us. Thoughts have been going on in my head, wondering what she was doing, looking and all I could come up with was that she didn't expect me to be with him.I felt like she thought that maybe she could corner him, thinking I was in the bathroom or some stupid sh*t after what his dad told me. I probably would have been if Liam hadn't noticed I was upset right away. But Lia
Unapologetically Me Christmas Party Cont.
LiamI looked around to see if anyone was watching us and took Kelly's hand in mine. Whatever one of my parents told her had her looking like she was going to be sick and I was not going to let that happen. It took me entirely too long to get Kelly to agree to be mine and I wasn't going to lose her so quickly.I took Kelly out of the event center and to the bank of elevators in the main lobby. We hopped into the elevators and I wrapped my arms around her after I clicked on the fortieth floor, where my office was located."You want to tell me what my parents said to you?" I nuzzle her neck, my favorite place to be and she sighs and leans her body back against mine and gives me more of her neck."No. Nothing you didn't prepare me for. It just sucks.""Who was it?""Your dad.""What did he say?"She takes a deep breath and I watch her chest rise and fall. She looks absolutely stunning in her red dress. The mom
Unapologetically Me Christmas Party
I stare at myself in the mirror, feeling nervous. I run a hand down my red, satin dress and smile. My hair is up in an intricate bun that took me an hour to do and I did my makeup as perfectly as I could get it without looking like I over did it. I have smoky eyes and red lips. My dress drops down into a deep v in between my breasts and it hangs down to mid calf with a high slit up to my hip. It's sexy and formal and I hope it says that I don't give a flying f*ck what anyone thinks about me.I put on my matching red stilettos and turn to my side and grin.I walk out into the living room where Liam is waiting for me and watch his eyes dance and darken as I step into the room. He swallows hard and pulls at his bow tie, then runs both hands down his chest. He looks hot as hell in a tuxedo and my mouth goes dry. "Do we have to go?" He asks as he steps closer to me. His cheeks are red and I smile at him. "Yes." I raise my eyebrows at him. "We have to go." He grabs my hips and brings me
Unapologetically Me Meeting Mom
The days are passing by slowly. It's almost painful, but there's absolutely nothing to be done. So I go to class, go to the gym, go to work and do it all over again. Liam, since I officially decided to be his girlfriend, has been checking in on me nonstop. It's a complete one eighty from how James would do when he was in school. It didn't matter if he was in a meeting or doing important business man sh*t, Liam would call or text me just because he missed me. We would even just be on the phone while he did paperwork in his office, not speaking, but just being on the line.And every day he would tell me about how many companies he has reached out to. He hadn't told his parents yet because he wanted to make sure he had a job first before he dropped the bomb on them.But he also hinted that his father was getting suspicious. I was on the line with him one day when his dad walked into his office. I knew it was his father because he greeted him as such. I muted
