Chapter 1

The glass suddenly falls shattering. That sound made me get out of my deep thoughts. Hah, this is a mess.

“Sorry… I didn’t mean to…”

Shaking my head, I saw my hands near the glass. For some reason, I know it was me who did that but can’t admit it to myself. Am I scared? Of my own image? Or am I… scared of the fact that I know nothing at all?

Ever since I was a little, I can’t deny the fact that I am so self-centered. That… I am so good at not looking through things so much. But… I don’t know why. Just seeing my own reflections makes me be reminded of that. They all look so real. As if… it isn’t just my imagination. 

This is weird, why am I being weird…

“Kianna? Hey, I’ve been calling your name for a while. Are you okay? Are you hurt?”

Looking at Drake whose face is full of worries, for some reason I feel my eyes getting warm. His facial expression changed. Is he alright? 

And all I can remember is him hugging me while I was sobbing till I slept. 

‘I am not sure when will she be okay. But just to remind you, there is nothing wrong with your wife. It is just that, some things trigger her trauma. All you have to do is make her feel loved. Make her feel that she is not alone. She has gone through lots of things just by learning about her condition. And you are the only one that can do that. I prescribed some medicine that would help her calm her mind and let her have a good sleep. If you would excuse me’

‘Thank you, Gion, I mean doc’

‘You don’t look that good too. You should take some good rest too Drake. Call me if anything else happens. Even if I am busy, I will surely make time’

‘You are really a great help’

‘Just paying back what I owe you. And also, isn’t this what friends are supposed to do?’

‘Yeah, thanks again’

I could hear how someone was talking. But I can’t clearly hear it at all. My mind is so blurry. As if… I want to wake up yet I can’t open my eyes.

‘Love, I hope you feel better soon’

I heard Drake mumble. It is clearer than last time. It is a bit loud too. Enough for me to hear it. maybe that is because he was just beside me? 

‘Just… what should I do just to make you be okay? If only I can shoulder all your problems then you won’t be hurt like this…’

What is he talking about? It is not as if he did something bad. There are things out of control and we can’t change it no matter what- 

Change… 

‘I thought this time would be better but, why are you still in pain? What caused you to have such worries? Is it that damn Marco? Or is it that shitty Francis?’

Wait, really, what is he talking about? Why did Marco and Francis become part of this?

What is… exactly happening?

But among those worries, what Drake said scares the hell out of me.

‘If they are the one that makes you this worried… will you be fine as long as they are gone?’

It was a side of Drake that I never knew. Am I scared of the fact that he is like that? or am I scared because it seems like I am the one who made him be like that?

Before I can even open my eyes… that voice I keep hearing at night echoed in my ears. 

‘Kianna’

‘Kianna’

Calling my name as if they are summoning me. Calling me again and again, making me have no choice but to do what they want.

Wosh

My eyes opened, it was so real that I felt like I really did wake up. And again… I am here in the place I am so scared of. 

‘This is just a dream’

‘This is just a dream’

‘This is just a dream’

I keep on chanting but just like all those nights, I can control my body yet I can’t control where I am. I want to get out of here, I want to leave. But… just like those nights, they are hindering me from doing so!

‘This is not a dream, Kianna’

A word escapes from the one behind me. I dare not look. It is so weird to see myself talking to myself. It feels like I am getting insane. Or maybe I am… this is bad. Am I turning crazy?

Drake…. Help me… please…

‘You always rely on him. You always do’

Someone talked from afar. And… just like the one behind me, they look alike so much.

‘Do you think things will be solved if you keep on hiding? Do you think things will go the way you want it to be?’

What are they talking about?

‘Kianna, don’t act dumb. I know you are aware of it, we know it’

One, two, three, four, just how many other Kianna are there?

Falling on my knees, I think I would go insane if I stayed any longer. 

‘You have to do something, Kianna. That is if you don’t want to end up like me…’

Why? What happened to you?

Looking at the one that was behind me just a while ago, she was kneeling facing me. Cupping my cheeks she smiles bitterly. 

‘Weird things happen, things you can’t explain. But Kianna… you have to do something. Remember… remember it’

And a blinding light then falls upon my sight. Making me wonder what were those things. 

Cupping my cheeks… that felt so real.

But there is something I will never forget. Her eyes… why does it look as if she was in despair? What happened to her? And what are the things she told me? 

Remember? Remember what? 

Do something? What should I do?

Standing up, no matter how much I tried to sleep back and meet them again, I kept on failing. How funny. It was I who didn’t want to see them yet here I am wanting to meet them again. 

“What is wrong with me?”

Drake? Where is Drake? 

Looking around, the house feels so empty. He is not in the kitchen or bathroom. Maybe he went somewhere? But what he said that time… he doesn’t mean it… right?

For some reason, I had the urge to open my laptop. It is not that I want to hear some news of something… but the last tab opened, it was about the recent news… and the moment I read the latest reports… my blood turned cold.

“Dad… he is… dead?”