Chapter 43

I was taken aback when someone suddenly caressed my cheek which caused my eyes to open and totally wake up. I immediately saw Aunt Zandra in front of me so I immediately got up on my seat.

 I fell asleep while watching and taking care of Zaine. I didn't realize the time when I suddenly felt my aunt's hand caressing my cheek.

 "It's good you're awake, hija."

 "Good evening," I greeted. "I'll go now."

 I arranged my belongings and was about to leave when Zaine's mother called me. I don't want to be with her but I also can't be rude to a lady in front of me now. I can't still forgets the last thing she said before the accident. If it weren't for her, all this wouldn't have happened.

 "I want us to talk about something." she said as she walks near me.

 I remained where I was and looked at Zaine who was sound asleep on her bed. He sleeps peacefully yet he doesn't have a clue on why he got into this accident. He's clueless and lost in this world now that he can't remember anything.

 "About what, aunt?"

 "About the accident." she calmly said.

 "What's about it?" I turned to her with a startled look. She usee to say something as if she planned it all along, but now, she looks hopeless for something I don't know. She doesn't looks manipulating but the other way around.

 "This is all my fault."

 I kept looking at her now with remorse in her eyes that were looking at me. She looks tired and the glow on her eyes faded. The sophisticated aura she always wears was gone too that it made me think twice if the person in front of me is really Zaine's mother.

 "If only I didn't tell that thing... none of this would have happened." she added.

 “It happened, aunt. And he has forgotten some memories. ” I answered while clutching the sling bag I was carrying. I still can’t help but shake my hands because of what’s up in front right now.

 “He has a Retrograde Amnesia. Some of his memories were lost and the doctors were still observing him. ” She explained as she diverted her gaze at her son who's peacefully lying on his bed.

 I had an idea that he may suffer from trauma but I didn't expect that it went too far, having an amnesia is something a person don't want to have. It will lose his memories, it can be the happy or traumatizing one. But I don't think Zaine deserve this. Somewhere in my mind tells me that what happens to him may be his escape from the truth. The truth that his mother was the one at fault. That it can made him enjoy the life without thinking the traumatizing and painful memories he had in the passed. 

 If Zaine didn't hear what his mother told me, maybe he didn't go back to the car and none of this things would have happened.

 "I am really sorry for the things I made to him." she said as if I am the one she's saying sorry for.

 “He still needs time, tita. Now that he is still suffering from amnesia. You need yo be with him always.” I told her. She has the right to tell him the truth but I think that this is not the right time. Zaine will never carry the burden of being away to his real best friend and his long lost lover, to Cheska.

 I felt a lump on my throat. The truth that I want to keep can't be easily forgotten nor buried. How selfish am I to claim Zaine as mine. He is not.

 I always reminded myself that he will never be but jealousy inside me took over my whole system. as if something that I want to get, that is to be with Zaine.

 But truth hurts. That it will never be me. It is always Czech. I think I can't change the fact that Cheska was really for Zaine. I know from the start that I will never be in Zaine's heart.

 He recognized me as Cheska, his best friend and that pained inside me. The guy you love isn't looking at you the way you are but seeing you with the person he loves. I don't know if that is a good sign that maybe I can replace her in Zaine's heart.

 "If only someone will help him remember."

 I got back from my reverie when I heard Tita Zandra spoke. She was still looking at Zaine

 "You can help him, Jane."

 “Huh? How? ” I asked confused at what she said.

 "Be with him always and don't leave him until he remembers everything."

 I hesitated with that. I don't know. I don't want to be with Zaine anymore. I want to forget this feelings I feel towards him. I want to distant myself from all of this. I want to forget. I wish I had just forgotten rather that Zaine.

 "I am not sure aunt..."

 “Please, this is my last request for you, Jane. Be with him. After that, I will let you and your family go. I will stop your engagement with him. ”

 " Aunt..."

 “I want my son to be happy. Be with him, please. ” she begged.

 “Once he remembers, you can leave him. You can do whatever you want. ” she added.

 I looked at her, she was pleading that I didn't expect to see, begging for her son to be happy. Somewhat, I see something on her, a mother's love towards his son. She will do everything even it will take her pride.

 I am not sure, but I want to try.

 “I want to do it not because you say so, aunt Zandra. I will do it because he is important to me. And if the time comes that his memories are finally back, I am willingly leave and be gone from his life.”