46. Josh's Suspicion (1)

Earlier, after Aunt Gong had cleaned up his lunch and done the rest of her work in the house, Josh started contemplating again about many things. About his relationship with Sharon, about his mother's mission, about Min Jinah's interference, about Ashley, and about himself personally.

He tried hard to unravel one by one the tangled threads that tied all his problems together into one big problem that was impossible to get rid of. But at the very least, he had to find a way out that he could use to make it subside so that it wouldn't get bigger and end up strangling him to death.

And as he sorts and reconnects everything—perhaps for the hundredth time—the only thing that can keep him alive is if he lets Sharon go. His mother's mission to save his father and sibling’s political future would be accomplished, he would make a huge profit for his company, Sharon would have no reason to threaten him, and Min Jinah could be quietly silenced once again.

But that was something he couldn't possibly do. Sharon was his life. And he had been living as the only reason for Sharon's survival. He was her soul. So if Josh dared to recklessly leave her, maybe he would really lose her forever.

In the end, there was no solution that could work in his favor.

So far, his most promising plan was to keep in touch with Sharon and cover her up tightly, just like he had done. But unfortunately, in practice, it wasn't that easy. He was too careless. If only he could do it more neatly... If only he could have bribed Sharon with more things so she would refrain from being seen with him in public...

Jason regretted everything deeply.

Now, the more he ran in the maze of his mind, the more he got lost and found only darkness.

Many times he was seen gritting his teeth while massaging his temples which felt very compressed and heavy. Sometimes he even pulled at his own hair because he could not relieve his own frustration. His curses and harsh breathing could also be heard loudly echoing through the room.

And before he knew it, he had been immersed in his own complicated problems for several hours. By the time he realized it, it was already nighttime and a new problem had been added to his pile—Ashley hadn't come home yet.

Josh didn't think much of it at first, because Ashley was an adult. That girl could certainly take responsibility for herself well. So he waited for a while without thinking about anything. 

He even called Sharon to tell her what had happened to him yesterday and convince her for a long time so that she could refrain from asking to see him for a while. Of course, in addition to seduction and the lure of many expensive gifts, Josh also tried to remind Sharon about how terrible her mother would be if that woman found new evidence of their continuing relationship. In the end, all of Sharon's unreasonable wishes had to be obeyed just so that the girl would be willing to promise to calm down and keep their secret relationship better.

But even after a long time had passed, and the night was getting late, Ashley still hadn't come home.

Josh tried to call Ashley, but instead found her cell phone lying on the nightstand in their room. 

Anxiety and conjecture of all kinds automatically passed through Josh’s mind. And no matter how much he pushed it away and tried to act unconcerned, he still couldn't get rid of his curiosity about why Ashley wasn't home yet.

To his knowledge, Ashley didn't have any friends here. And if Josh asked about her to people in her house, it would only lead to new suspicions and problems for him that would widen even further. 

So, it leaves him with absolutely no other choice but to wait.

Then, when a bizarre prejudice suddenly flashed through his head without warning and so randomly, Josh immediately jumped up to approach the closets that towered along the side wall of the room. For some reason it made him suspect that Ashley might have run away from the house, and had taken her things away when he wasn't home yesterday.

Josh frantically opened all the closet doors. No matter how good he was at portraying a rational and authoritative man, when haunted by worries, at some point he would lose his mind like that.

After running around like a madman to check all the cupboards in the room, he let out a very long breath. All the closets were still as full as ever. There was nothing missing. Which indicated that Ashley had not run away and still had a high possibility of returning to their home. The problem was, that girl really hadn't shown any signs of returning.

It felt like he shouldn't be relieved just knowing that fact, but instead drifted back into a worry that felt endless—what Ashley was doing, where she was now, and what actually happened.

Until Josh himself had calmed down enough and intended to clean up the mess—closing the closet doors again—that he had made, he accidentally caught the edge of a folder sticking out among Ashley's pile of clothes. He then pulled it out without any intention, actually. Just purely curious as to why there was something unusual striking amongst the neatly organized pile of clothes.

Once he got it, he opened the cover and saw what was inside.

And Josh could feel fireworks-like explosions suddenly filling his head when he read what was written on it.

Starting from reading quickly, he repeated it again from the very first page by reading earnestly and carefully.

After finishing reading the last page, Josh went back to the beginning and re-read the entire chapter of the document with full concentration and focus that he increasingly poured as much as possible. It was as if he wanted to make sure that what his eyes caught was not just a hallucination. At the same time, he also did not want to miss a single word that he might be able to use as a weapon of his luck.