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33. Who cares?
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The Marriage Game: love in a lie. 34. Searching.
JamesI didn’t return to the house that day. It wasn’t a conscious decision on my part, there really was something to fix at work. But I held onto it and it became my excuse for not going back home.If I was holed up here a little longer, I wouldn’t need to deal with the aftermath of my chaotic night confession. I hadn’t told her the entire truth, just enough for her to know who she was dealing with.I didn’t like to dwell on the past or the trauma my parents had caused. If anything I’d sealed the memory in the deepest part of my mind. Because letting it control my life meant that my parents still had a hold on me even in the afterlife. I was way too stubborn to let that happen.But I’d left her a note to let her know that I was coming back home, to have another conversation about everything I told her. I didn’t think I was ready, the whole point of telling her about my past was for her to know I was an imperfect man under all this disguise and realize that I really was not good for h
The Marriage Game: love in a lie. 35. Vincent.
JamesThere’s one place left to check for Amara; her parents’ house. The chances that she went there were zero but not completely impossible. I just needed to cover all bases before I could accept that she may have been kidnapped.The butler let me in, asking me to wait for him to inform Sarah that I was around, but it wasn’t time for formalities.If Amara was really kidnapped then every single second mattered for me to find her and bring her back home safe with me. “What’s all the fuss for?” Sarah looked up from her desk, her landline in hand. “You didn’t tell me you were visiting.” She hung up the phone. “Is Amara here?”She looked confused. “Why will she be here? I didn’t get any information that she planned to visit.”My worst fear was coming to life right in front of my eyes. “You’re sure she didn’t come back here?”Sarah whose smartness I’ve applauded in the past was quick to figure out the situation. “Is my daughter missing?” I didn't want to say it out loud because then the
The Marriage Game: love in a lie. 36. Rescued.
JamesDeath wasn’t something new in my life, in fact, I knew it very well and at a very young age. And what that does to a man like me is make you unflinching even in the face of blood. I wasn’t worried that the nuzzle might be facing me when I pulled the trigger, all I prayed for was that Amara had run out of the room and made it to safety. Moreover, I didn’t want her to see me like this. She was sobbing and shaking me when I came. The noise in my head was quieting down and I could finally hear what she was saying.“James, please come back to me. You can't die like this.”My beautiful girl was sad over me but I didn’t want to be the reason for her tears. It wasn’t worth it. I lifted my hand to her cheek. “Don’t cry.”“I thought you got shot, I don’t think I’d ever be able to forgive myself if you died because of me. You should’ve left when I told you to, Vincent is crazy.”I pulled her into my chest. “I thought I lost you. I searched everywhere for you, I want your apartment, your
The Marriage Game: love in a lie. 37. Not anymore.
Amara I tossed and turned all night. It was hard not to see Vincent's scheming face whenever I closed my eyes. I did not expect to forget the circumstance immediately but I thought I could escape it by sleeping. Instead, his hands, though cold and dead, wrapped my neck every time I tried to drift into oblivion. I didn’t have the perfect family as a child, but there wasn’t a major trauma that I had to deal with. Having James beside me would’ve helped me sleep but I was too stubborn to let him see me in this vulnerable state. I wanted to be strong, and it annoyed me to no end that Vincent might have broken me before he left this world. I’d scrubbed my cheeks and lips with all my strength in the bathroom just so I could get rid of the memory of his hands on me. How was I supposed to kiss someone else without imagining his vile mouth on mine? James didn’t deserve the way I treated him. Yet, I couldn’t help my body’s reaction. Everything happened all too fast and my brain was struggli
The Marriage Game: love in a lie. 38. It's time.
AmaraThe air was much clearer when we land in New York. Being miles away from where Vincent was made me feel lighter, like the hand he’d wrapped around my neck was broken loose.James held me through as we made our way to his house. He opened the roof of the car and let the cool evening air welcome us home. It was easy to pretend that everything was okay as we sped past the tall buildings.Here, in the noisy streets, it was easy to drown out my thoughts and instead let myself drown in the small hum of the huge city. Unlike London, it was far from gloomy here, it was easy to get immersed into the life of others.We pulled into the house and we got down. I looked at the security house only to see a man I didn’t recognize. “What of Michael?”James brought out our bags from the trunk. “He’s still in the hospital, but not to worry. He only suffered a concussion. He’s awake but they need to monitor him for a couple more days before he can be discharged.”I nodded, unable to hide my relief
The Marriage Game: love in a lie. 39. As long as it takes.
James To the outside world, they wouldn’t notice the difference in Amara since she got back. But I could. She smiled less, ate less, acted like the world around her did not exist. And I hated it because she shut me out too.I couldn’t help her if she wasn’t willing to let me do that, or at least let me in so I could share in her troubles. I’d set up the office in the house so I could stay with her at all times. I filled Cayden in on what was happening, so he could take on other affairs that needed my attention at the company. It was a good thing that most of our important deals were done, he’d only have to handle all the paperwork.Still, I couldn’t let Amara walk around the house like some ghost with her haunting presence. I wanted to see her smile, laugh, and call me out on my bullshit when I acted like a jerk. I wanted my Amara back. She was in the studio I set up for her. All she did was stare at the paints and empty canvas. She never made any attempt to actually touch her paint
The Marriage Game: love in a lie. 40. I love you.
AmaraJames’s confession had to be a cruel joke that the universe was playing on me. He’d turned me down, reminded me countless times that our relationship was fake, and now he was saying he loved me?I should be ecstatic, the feelings I had for him were no longer one-sided. But I couldn’t bring myself to be because now he had me wondering—would he have realized he loved me if Vincent didn’t kidnap me.To think it took me almost getting married to someone else for him to finally realize his feelings for me was a slap in the face. It didn’t matter anyway, I already made up my mind to leave after the dinner.I wanted some time alone from him to sort out my feelings. Our flight back to New York was quiet, each of us lost in our thoughts. First, I needed to pack up my things from his room. I’d go back to my apartment but it was in need of deep cleaning so I’ll have to crash at the family house while I get it in order. Having to deal with my mother was better than staying in this emotiona
The Marriage Game: love in a lie. 41. The truth.
AmaraIt felt like all the walls were closing in on me, I couldn’t breathe. My heart hammered in my ears and my breath came out in short gasps.Everyone had been lying to me, keeping secrets from me, and I believed every single one of them. Now, I looked like a clown in their fucking circus. If only the ground would open up and swallow me whole.Why couldn’t I just catch a break?First, it was Vincent, now James and my mum. Making decisions behind my back, like I was a fucking child they could control.“Amara, please just listen to me. I had no choice.”I’d forgotten he was there. I didn’t turn to answer him, because then he’d see the tears uncontrollably rolling down my cheeks. I wasn’t going to give him the satisfaction of seeing me cry.“Everyone has a choice, James. You withheld that information from me because you thought I wouldn’t agree to the contract otherwise. You had me believe I finally outsmarted my mum, meanwhile she was the one that orchestrated our relationship. I can’
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The Marriage Game: love in a lie. 53. Forever and Always.
AmaraIt was finally the time for the election results to be announced. The election ended an hour before.Everyone was tense, our little family gathered in the dim lit study that was crowded with campaign materials and posters.We’d done interviews, appeared in shows as a family. This time we weren’t reciting the words that my mother’s publicist had written down for us.Everything that was said, all the laughter that was shared, came from a place of warmth deep in our hearts. One of the show hosts had commented on how lifely we seemed, had called it an election miracle and we’d all laughed over it.My mum said we’d celebrate, whether she won Mayor or not. But I knew deep down that she wanted that seat, and without being biased I knew she was the right person for the job. I listened with all focus, at the edge of my seat as the announcement started. We all waited, a sword could’ve cut through the tension in the room with ease.And that hell broke loose when mum was declared the winner
The Marriage Game: love in a lie. 52. Start to Finish.
AmaraI was pretty sure anyone within a mile from me could hear how hard my heart was beating against my chest. It’s been forever since I had James near me. The feel of his lips warm against my cold skin sent my senses into a frenzy.Even as I waved him goodbye and watched him pull out of the curb, I could still feel him on me. I stood there longer than I should have, rooted to the spot, because I couldn’t quieten down my own heart or get my feet to move.I heard the door open before Ife’s shrill voice followed. “What are you doing outside in the cold? I didn’t think you were going to come back.”That snapped me out of my reverie and I followed her inside. “Why did you think that?” I hung up my coat and sat down on the couch. I wasn’t quite ready to call it a night.“I thought you’d be too busy making up in his sheets.”The image flashed through my head. I put my palms over my eyes. “Ife!”“I saw the way you were looking at him Amara, like you want to tear his shirt off and mask him
The Marriage Game: love in a lie. 51. A New Dawn.
JamesWe had our dinner in complete silence, each of us consumed by their own thoughts. I wish Amara would just tell me what was going through her mind so I would know how to fix the problem between us.I drank all of my wine, and so did she. I could tell she was warming up to me from the way her gaze lingered too long on me, or how her eyes drifted to my lips when she thought I wasn’t looking.“Thank you for having dinner with me,” I told her when we were done.“I only agreed because of my mother, I don’t want to ruin the new relationship I have with her.”I wanted to call her bluff. Amara wasn’t the type to do something just because others asked. I’ll let her get away with the excuse because it brought her closer to me.“You can drop me off at Ife’s house, I haven’t cleaned my apartment yet so I’ll be staying there longer than planned.”I helped her with her coat. “The night is still young, and there’s somewhere I’ve been dying to take you to.”Her eyes narrowed at me. “You’re not t
The Marriage Game: love in a lie. 50. Hope
James“Alright.”For a complete ten seconds I stood there without registering her response. I’d been so sure she was going to turn down my suggestion that I found it hard to believe that I was hearing right. “You’re going to give me a chance to talk things over?”“I just said yes James, don’t make me change my mind.”It’s a good thing I’d kept the reservation I made in anticipation for tonight. Cayden and Henry had tried to talk me out of it, that she’d clearly rejected me many times and I needed to give up.But I’d held onto the hope that I had. That she would remember the good times we had and give me a chance. Looks like luck was on my side. I wish I could flip my middle finger in their faces.“I made a reservation at a restaurant, just the two of us. If that’s okay with you.” I needed to play my cards right so I don’t upset her and have her banging the door in my face again. “I’m already having dinner with my family, we can just talk in your car. I think—”“Oh, Amara.” My mother
The Marriage Game: love in a lie. 49. The Revelation.
AmaraIt was finally here; the day of my grand reveal. I was well within my rights to be nervous, everybody else would.I’d been worried that people would not show up for the exhibition, why would they for an artist they didn’t even know what she looked like. But boy, was I wrong? The gallery was fully packed save for the small makeshift stage that was situated at the far corner where my name was put up in a banner.Ife was with me, but the more she tried to calm my nerves, the more nervous I grew.My family was not here yet and it made me worried. What if mum changed her mind about supporting me and saw the exhibition as a waste of her time?It was unfair doubting her like this. But, when you’ve been burned many times in the past, it becomes hard not to grow weary that it could happen all over again.“What if she didn’t get the invite?” I asked Ife.“Who?”“My mum, they’re not here yet. Do you think she bailed?”“You need to have more faith in the people around you, Amara. I’m sure
The Marriage Game: love in a lie. 48. Ready!
AmaraSpending time with my family helped me get out of the mental dump I’d found myself in. It was nice to sit down in complete laughter, enjoying the laughter and the food the cook had put her magic touch in. I slept over and went back the next morning to Ife’s place, only to find her sitting through a couple letters.“Have a secret admirer?” I teased, hanging up my jacket.“As if. These are for you?”I looked over her shoulder at the pink flowered envelopes she was holding. “I can’t think of a single person on this damn planet that’ll be sending me letters.”“Well, I can. They’re from James, maybe it’s time you give him a listening ear. I’m beginning to feel bad for him.”“You can do whatever you want with the letters.” I walked straight to the door and shut it after me. I sat on the floor, head hung between my knees. Why was he making it so difficult to move on from him? It wasn’t that I couldn’t forgive him, I just wouldn’t be able to trust him again. Going back to him would be
The Marriage Game: love in a lie. 47. Better life.
AmaraIt’s been days and I still haven’t had the courage to leave Ife’s house for fear that I’d run into James. My defenses were beginning to wear down all the efforts he was putting to win me back. I was afraid that I’d finally give in to him.James Mckenna had the power to easily break my heart the second time, and I wasn’t going to let that happen. Which was why I was totally avoiding him. I made sure not to read any of the messages or emails he sent me. I just blocked him immediately and put my phone in Ife’s drawer where I’ll not be tempted to go through them. But, I was done wallowing in self pity, it was time to get up and move on with my life.Everything didn’t start and end with James. Although it hurt to admit that in my heart—it did.I stood up from the bed, showered and joined Ife where she was making breakfast in the kitchen.“Nice to see you up and about,” she said with a smile when I walked in.“I can’t be the sad heartbroken girl forever.”She raised a brow at me. “Wha
The Marriage Game: love in a lie. 46. Reinforcements.
JamesI have never, through all my years of existence, considered myself an emotional man. I moved through everything with the philosophy that I could get whatever it is that I wanted by putting in the hardwork and doing my possible best in every situation.That was how I grew my company from nothing to a multi-million dollar company, opened many branches in the US, and was featured in Forbes. It had worked until now.I wanted to have Amara but all my efforts were going down the drain. I’d decided to give her some space to think everything through and come back to me, but that wasn’t the case and it drove me over the edge.The more she rejected me, the more my desire for her grew. It was hard to imagine a life without her, so I had to keep trying.My alarm went off and I knew it was time for the meeting with the branch managers, but I couldn’t get myself to move from where I sat.All that was on my mind was how to win Amara back, and have her stay at my side. It had hurt when she pus
The Marriage Game: love in a lie. 45. It hurts!
AmaraI’ve been in the same spot on Ife’s bed since I made her room my hideout. The window blinds are drawn and the lights out. It’s all dark and depressing inside her room.I managed to turn Ife’s vibrant room to a messy little cave that I don’t ever want to leave. In here, I don’t have to worry about running into James again, or having to face my mother and talk about what she had done.Thank God I’d gotten my hair braided before this, it would’ve been a tangled mess on my hair right now.The music player on her bookshelf kept playing the heartbreak playlist I’d found on spotify. There was something about being sad and listening to sad songs that was very comforting. It made me feel seen and understood in this madness. I never want to get up from here. I was going to lie down here, cry my balls out and hope that someday I’ll become one with the bed. Hopefully, Ife would be very kind and not throw me out of her room.My phone buzzed on the bedside table and I picked it up. It was my
