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2021-08-20 18:56:14‘Don’t you agree, London?’ Alexi’s voice breaks into my thoughts as I slide in beside him in on my return from the bathroom; A small space between him and Alessandra, who is facially glued to Gino as they have themselves a passionate make-out session. Her arse bumps into me as I squeeze against Alexi a little more, sliding my arm in his, so I can lean closer and nestle in against him with my temple on his shoulder. I’m starting to wane with booze consumption and sore feet from way too much dance floor shenanigans. I’m getting tired as the night moves into the early hours. It has to be after 2 a.m. for sure.
‘Agree with what?’ I flutter my lashes up at him adoringly from my position and he automatically smooths a hair from across my face as he gazes back down at me. A slight gentle touch that causes a million tingles to erupt from my skin and insides, insides somersaulting and letting loose my cage of butterflies, and I try
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‘Alexi!’ I squeal in hysterics, holding onto my assets and wriggling like crazy as he rights me on my feet. He just effortlessly pulls me back to him, like I’m a weightless rag doll and yanks me back to our couples dance position. I can barely breathe between laughing and trying to catch my breath from being tossed around. Eyes streaming from the sudden fun of him and dress pulled half around me in the most awkward way, that’s almost obscene. I try to right myself as we return to calm and gentle swaying once more, buzzing from enjoying his playfulness.I like this Alexi; he’s someone I could spend time with.‘This better?’ He jokes in my ear, yanking my dress for me so it straightens out, and I just shake my head at him in complete indulgence. He’s lightening the awkwardness of tender moments by adding comedy and losing all serious Alexi with it. I hate to admit it … he looks adorable when he’s being fo
Last Updated : 2021-08-20The Carrero Contract (series book 3) 112
‘Honestly, I can do it, I’m fine. It didn’t hurt.’ I turn towards him to dislodge his arm from around me, agitated with his efforts, patting him on the chest to let me go with a smile through gritted teeth. He leans back up, so we are nose to nose and that’s the last thing I see of his face.Like a flash out of nowhere someone tugs me out of his arm, so that I stumble backwards into a wall and lose my balance momentarily. Head spinning with the suddenness of it and the black form that literally dive bombs him with such force it takes him flying back against the hall wall so fast I cannot really focus on what’s happening right away.It takes me a moment to realise what the hell is going on, as Alexi pins him by the throat to the inner hall wall and starts pummelling a fist into the guy’s face. He’s all over him like a fierce animal, wildly unleashed, punching, holding him up and lifting a knee to the man’s abdomen wi
Last Updated : 2021-08-21The Carrero Contract (series book 3) 113
It all happens so fast, it’s like a blur.Getting deposited in a car by Jackson while all around me becomes surreal and dreamlike. I feel weirdly numb overall but there’s a simmering energy inside of me that has me on edge, overly aware and completely strung out. Snappy with the man ushering me in here and I wrench myself out of his grip and throw myself into a window seat childishly, carrying my shoes.The bus is a small transport that seats twelve people. Long and low with pairs of comfortable leather seats on each side of the aisle and tinted windows. Like the limousine of buses. The driver looks hired, so I know to be hush-hush about what went down and I sulk like a child, crossing my arms over my chest and stare out into the dark street, tapping my bare feet against the leg as my heels nestle in my lap where I just dropped them.Alexi shows up minutes after me looking devoid of any sort of regret, and like an automatic trigger for my wrath, my t
Last Updated : 2021-08-21The Carrero Contract (series book 3) 114
We get there eventually, another tense silent car ride where everyone pretends the others are invisible, and Mico just seems to be texting furiously, ignoring the brutal standoff between us. The air is heavy and dense with it and I try my best to act nonchalant and stop myself from letting anger get the better of me. I have no energy left for this and I just want to go home. I’m deflated, body aching from a night of dancing and intoxication and now I think I’m suffering the trailing effects of shock.All I want to do is lie down on the plane and block him out until I get there and can go to bed to get the hell away from him. I’m weary as the booze wears off and the night’s events take over my shattered mind to traumatise me with visions of half mangled heads.Exhausted and waning. I don’t want to fight anymore. I just feel all used up and suddenly emotionally fragile. Nerves frayed and on the verge of bawling my eyes out. I guess it’
Last Updated : 2021-08-21The Carrero Contract (series book 3) 115
I have worked my arse off for five days getting this club ready, and now, as opening night looms upon me, I stand out in the car park giving Feral his daily food portion. Sun blazing down on us in this gorgeous weather, warming my head and shoulders in my loose shirt dress, completely out of the norm for the time of year and I feel a little less tense than I did indoors. My nerves for re-opening night have been getting to me for days, and I’m strung up to high heaven with a constant lead weight in my stomach.I may have grown a little attached to this snarling little ginger beast and have been feeding him twice a day when I pop out here for air. It’s become ritualistic for me. Escaping my confines for breathing space to expel my anxiety and seeing to this hopeless creature. He’s starting to look a lot more appealing these days, now that skin and bone has a slight padding and thicker healthier fur.He’s staring at me from under the bonnet of the
Last Updated : 2021-08-21The Carrero Contract (series book 3) 116
I head back for the lift and go downstairs.I do a walk through with Jackson following me, around all the rooms and seating areas, pointing out tiny things that should be rectified before Showtime. Such as the squint light on the ceiling of the largest lounge pit in the main VIP lounge. And the lopsided fabric of one of the swags up over the stage. He goes off to find a ladder and I drill the staff who have come in early to do last minute prep on tonight’s running. I am in boss mode and trying to focus all my nerves on the little details. An area I have always excelled at.‘Keep the champagne circulating; always have full trays walking around, and keep the food going too. Treat this like a charity event where you would constantly have canapés and booze being distributed among the guests. If they are sitting, then watch for them gesturing you over. I want every single man who comes in here to feel like he has our full and utmost attention on them and
Last Updated : 2021-08-21The Carrero Contract (series book 3) 117
‘So what have I missed … and are we ready for nine p.m.?’ Straight to the point, no other chit-chat or mention of last week?Fine by me.Two can play at that game!If Alexi is taking the all business route to interact with me then I can handle that just fine. However, I hate that it makes me feel weirdly upset and just triggers a nerve—stupidly so.‘I took care of everything. Club’s ready, guests are sorted, and everything is in hand. All you need to do is put on a suit and look intimidating.’ I smile drily, tight facial expressions because it takes so much effort.So be normal then.Not that he isn’t in jeans and a t-shirt, it’s just like this he’s more street boxer than Mafia king and that edge of psycho he keeps in his back pocket is not so obvious when he dresses down. As much as I dislike that part of who he can be, I dislike it when he is less
Last Updated : 2021-08-21The Carrero Contract (series book 3) 118
Alexi is avoiding me. Party in full swing on our first night and I am completely in control of the event. I would go as far as saying our first night is a success, minus one tiny little detail …Tyler, my ex-drug dealer, that beat me half to death has come as a guest; I was too preoccupied because of Alexi to check the bloody guest list before coming down here to see. Joanne, the tit of a girl, obviously ignored the list of banned names when looking through this, or else it was deliberate, and she’s in need of a good slap. It just adds a level of extreme anxiety to my night and has me looking over my shoulder constantly always aware of where he is.I may have nothing to fear from him anymore, but he still tried to kill me and that won’t just go away. My stomach is swirling with nerves knowing he’s here, and I just cannot relax. I keep biting my lip and picking my nails and then scalding myself for showing my unease so obviously. I’m bette
Last Updated : 2021-08-21
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The Carrero Contract (series book 3) 190
I’m standing staring at myself in the mirror, nerves eating away at me and fidgeting with my dress a little obsessively. It’s long, fitted, ivory, and very classy. A sleek, full-length, fishtailed number that looks great on my body, with my toned-down neutral face and minimal jewellery. Stomach in knots and anally checking my appearance like my life depends on it. Despite knowing, I look flawless. Déjà vu from the morning I met his mother and yet this is way worse. I’m terrified. “You look gorgeous, stop fretting.” Alexi’s voice comes from behind me and he sways to the side of me as he approaches. I stop him mid-step and lean my body against him gently. Backing myself against him. This is something I have been working on for a while now. Letting Alexi get behind me, touch me when standing there and leaning against him. He doesn’t object, just stands still recognising my attempt and lets me fall back against him gently. It’s stupid and weird, I guess, that it’
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Soon as we get out the door Mico flanks me on one side with Alexi on the other and we are instantly surrounded by more Carrero security. Like a black wall that’s impenetrable and offers instant calm to my frazzled brain. Guiding us efficiently and shielding us from all angles. Overkill, but I guess I’m thankful for it.“What about the rest of her outfit?” Alexi asks as we walk briskly out of the building, the first to leave, but I can already hear chairs scraping as others depart, now we have. Some of them eager to walk away now they've found a resolution to this debacle.It’s weird how something that hung over us for months is tied up with a bow in one very brief sitting. I can’t get my head around the fact the threat is gone, and I no longer need to live under house arrest for any reason. A sudden lightness to my mood as the heavy weight of burden is lifted.“Most departed as soon as they heard their source of income w
The Carrero Contract (series book 3) 188
They lead us to a large, carved, ugly wooden door depicting nude women mid-orgy, and I eye roll at the crassness. Suits Santagato to a T. Mico slides in front of us quickly, knocks on it several times in a coded bang while we wait silently and patiently. Tension making the air so thick I can almost cut it with a knife. I have to still my trembling body, clinging onto him for dear life, focusing on his warm hand encasing mine snugly as a form of grounding and I repeat the mantra ‘he will always protect me’ inside my head.It’s opened immediately and two men move aside as we are let into a dark, smoky room where several men are sitting at a long table. I cannot count how many there are, eyes scanning the crowded scene quickly as my focus tries to adjust rapidly. I swallow my breath, my heart plummets and I just let him take the lead.Alexi walks us in behind two of his men and Mico. I can tell at a glance which ones are the bosses, by their suits and gr
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“Please,” I whisper it so quietly, begging him to stop questioning, to just take what I’m offering him. He surely understands my reasons. I close my eyes when he finally leans up and pulls one end of the strap and tugs it off my wrist slowly. The material sliding coldly and making me shiver. Eyes on what he’s doing, and I exhale, appeased that we are still going ahead even if a part of me dies a little inside. Like an idiot because I started this.I wait with bated breath for the dreaded feel of leather on my skin, but nothing happens. Anticipation makes me tetchy, heightening my senses to alarming levels and I notice every noise and sensation. I'm antsy and I can’t stand it anymore.Instead, the slide of the one around my neck startles me and I gulp in air, jumping slightly, realising he might start with leashing me and tying me after he gets a makeshift collar on me. A lot of men like Alexi like to have you leashed and tied up for full c
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Teeth, tongues, lips, coming together of a rather aggressive game of tonsil tennis as his hands slide up my body and I wrap my legs around his waist. Moaning quietly with the way he ignites every nerve ending in me. Body tingling and on fire within seconds as I rub myself against the button and rough zip on his trousers, pushing myself into a fevered frenzy of longing.There is no real foreplay, just a sudden need to consummate our passion right here and now and I reach down and unbutton him so he can spring free from the confines of fabric. Alexi feels me out, probing my warmth with his fingers, finding me wet and willing and doesn’t waste time on formalities.He slides into me soon as he leans back over me and presses down on me as he does so, so our bodies fit snugly and muffle my moans of pleasure as they overtake me. Snug as a hand in a glove, he fills me up in the best kind of way, spreading that pulsating, gorgeously good feeling up through my pelvis and i
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These are things people figure out before they marry someone, and here we are, already invested and now I’m thinking about the fact I should have told him this already.Babies! Not a fucking chance in hell. He won’t know, unless he did read all my journals, but even then. I wouldn’t say it was obvious from those diary excerpts that my inability to have kids was permanent or even a blessing. I went over the abortion and such and the after-effects and recovery, but I don’t think I ever spelt it out, in black and white, that my body no longer produces eggs for any chance of fertilisation.How do you tell the man cradling a newborn like he was born to do so if that’s where his hopes lie then it won’t happen with me?How do I tell him that I can’t give him this and wouldn’t want to even if I could? Is this what he wants?The happy 2.4 children, family home a
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It’s not the expected outcome; grown woman turning to childish puppy dog mush, pawing at her angry husband like a devious minx; I find myself eye rolling at the lamest form of female manipulation there is.“You knew? You met her?” Accusatory tone as she tries to regain some footing. Alexi sighs loudly and I glance his way to see him turn and butt himself against the table, throwing me an unreadable look before he downs another drink and I try not to count how many that is. By the look of his sudden lack of trying, I guess he has been prone to scenes like this before, where his father had to steamroll in to defend him, and Alexi mentally goes off on a cruise and leaves him to it. I just stand here like an idiot, a third wheel and in no way wanting to witness this shit.“He’s my son. He has no secrets from me, he never did. Unlike you, he confides in me and comes to me often!” It’s putting her in her place and any other mother mi
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The house is huge and beautiful like some sort of movie set for the lifestyle of the rich and famous. A towering white mansion set in a beautiful green manicured garden like some modern painting. Set in the sunny Hamptons, near the coast in a very picturesque area that comprises of nothing but huge grand houses, that just spew wealth. I can see why the Carreros reign supreme here. It’s like the real housewives of Orange County.Their home a show house for sure, completely devoid of lived in family life and we are let in by a maid who ushers us into a sitting room in what appears to be a deserted house until she runs off to find our host. Marble entranceway not dissimilar to that of Alexi’s nearby abode, huge sweeping staircase in a flawless neutral palette. It’s glossy magazine worthy with massive professional vases of floral arrangements dotted at key points on expensive furniture around the edges of the room.I find it odd that Alexi is being treate
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“I can’t do this, Lexi.” My heart is hammering through my chest and I have checked my appearance three dozen times in the full-length mirror of the bedroom we stayed in for the rest of the night. Obsessed with my appearance as anxiety strangles the life out of me. Trying to focus on something I can control and getting a little preoccupied with its importance.We were busy most of last night, making up for our strained day with lots of gentle lovemaking, kissing and caresses, and I’m aglow with his attention today. Cheeks flushed, skin dewy, and a twinkling happiness in my eyes I’ve never seen before. I felt completely chilled when I got up this morning, well almost completely. That was until he dumped this little announcement on me that we’re having a cosy family brunch at Mummy’s house.Ugh. Last night was a repeat of the night he first made love to me, after the failed kidnapping at the club. Only without him
