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Chapter 64: Brett
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The Bound Collection Chapter 65: Annie
I hadn't been able to persuade Brett that buying a baby wasn't an option. He had convinced himself we could simply put out feelers on the black market and have an infant next week. In his mind, with enough money, we could have whatever we wanted. While I loved his exuberance, he wouldn't even know how to go underground if it were an option. One thing he had proven, repeatedly, was his love and devotion. It was unwavering, and regardless of how much I struggled against it, his commitment remained intact. In the weeks following the miscarriage, I spent more time with Dr. Carthage wondering why everything was such a struggle for me. Normal people moved on, tried again, kept hoping, and considered other options. For me, there were no other options-everything was absolute and final. I wasn't interested in adoption the more I'd thought about it, and infertility treatments just weren't for me. We looked at in vitro, spent tons of time researching it, and even went to a specialist in Atlanta
The Bound Collection Chapter 66: Annie
The four of us met at a little Greek restaurant downtown, and the moment I laid eyes on her, I knew why Dan had kept her around. Lissa and I were so much alike it was uncanny. Brett and Dan were like twins, and this girl and I could have passed for the same. I assumed when Brett told me where we were going it was to appease my casual style. Turned out, Dan had picked the restaurant, and it suited both me and Lissa. All the way down to her worn black Docs. Lissa's kind heart showed through in everything she did, from the way she watched Dan, to her touching his forearm when she recalled a story from one of their dates. But she could go toe to toe with him. When he gave her a ration of crap, she held her own. Her eyes danced in playful jest as they bantered back and forth. I'd never seen Dan with a woman who complemented him as well as Lissa did. The fact she was stunning only further helped her case. Dan's features never registered with me. He was my husband's best friend since birt
The Bound Collection Chapter 67: Annie
Brett left early the next morning to meet Dan for a basketball tournament at the YMCA. The league they played in held a tournament at the end of every season, and their team typically made it to the finals. This was the semi-finals, and they'd be gone most of the day. Leaning off the side of the bed, I dug my phone out of my jeans to send him a text wishing him good luck and to tell him I loved him. I'd forgotten about silencing the conversation with Gray until I saw the red notification that glowed on the message app.Gray: How'd you know I got divorced?Gray: Never mind. I'm sure Brett told you.Gray: I guess you're busy. I thought Brett was out of town this weekend and had hoped we could talk.Gray: Guess not.Gray: It's been a really hard day. Needed a friend. You're the only person who understands.I read his texts over and over, contemplating the best way to handle the situation, whether or not to reply. My text to Brett forgotten, my fingers hovered over the keyboard in
The Bound Collection Chapter 68: Annie
I'd been on such a high yesterday with Brett's game and hanging out with Lissa, Lynn's showing up this morning brought me crashing down. We'd made plans earlier in the week to take the dreaded monthly pregnancy test, but somehow it didn't feel right without Brett. Or maybe I didn't want to face the disappointment without him. I never understood how women said they knew until now-now I understood. I knew I wasn't pregnant and didn't need to pee on a stick for confirmation."You're really not going to do it?" Lynn asked, miffed."What's the point?" This had become harder each month that ended with the same answer."Maybe this is the month? You guys haven't been trying that long."I glared at my friend-time was relative. A year may not seem like much in her world, but it was an eternity in mine. I knew what she meant, but that wasn't the way my heart wanted to take it. As sweetly as I could muster, I responded, "You're right. It hasn't been the years many people try, but I've now had
The Bound Collection Chapter 69: Annie
Gray texted me daily. None of it seemed significant, and I shared every message with Brett, but he hadn't been interested in the details. I'd watched for signs of irritation but hadn't seen any. I offered to let him read the communication, but while he appreciated my telling him about them, he didn't need to see them. I guess he figured if I shared that they took place it wasn't likely I was doing something I should be hiding. But after a taxing night of baby discussions, miscarriage acknowledgments, and once again beating the dead horse about adoption, I made a mistake and reached out. It wasn't so much that I wanted to talk to Gray as I wanted to vent to someone who wouldn't stick up for Brett and tell me what a wonderful husband he was for trying to give us a family. I already knew all of that, but I needed an outlet who wouldn't insist on playing Devil's advocate. The words flowed too easily, the confessions too intimate. Every doubt, every fear, every frustration, and hang up-
The Bound Collection Chapter 70: Brett
It pained me to contemplate her wanting to see him again, but there was something in Annie that would never heal until she could recognize it wasn't her job to save him. There wasn't an ounce of me that believed she wanted to be with him although that may have been naïve. I just knew my wife. She had told me years ago she hoped they could be friends. Before we ever married, she confided in me her desire for friendship, but I never believed it would transpire. I assumed when Gray realized she had moved on, he'd leave her alone in favor of some other obsession. Maybe I had hoped some part of him loved her enough to do so. But that would require him to acknowledge he had hurt her to begin with, and he clearly had yet to do that. After almost four years, I foolishly believed he was out of her life forever. I knew our relationship was strong enough to withstand the likes of Gray, but I didn't want her confiding in him. Selfishly, I didn't want her sharing any of our lives with him. I didn
The Bound Collection Chapter 71: Annie
We agreed to meet at Applebee's. I couldn't help but think of the odd significance this restaurant had in our relationship. The first time we hung out beyond the DC was at the Applebee's closest to 3 Tier when Gray was still married. Now it was the Applebee's closest to my newest client, and I was the one who was married. The difference was Gray knew I was married, and my husband knew where I was. I would be lying if I said I wasn't nervous. I continuously rubbed my sweaty palms on my jeans. I hadn't seen Gray, not even in passing, in years. It was odd how the universe kept throwing us together when we were single, but once I got married, I never ran into him, never even caught a glimpse of him until I ran into him at the DC recently. As soon as I pulled into the parking lot, I saw him standing up against a silver Harley with his feet crossed at the ankles and arms over his chest. He was just as stunning as he'd always been, but he'd filled out a little. Mostly it was just the natu
The Bound Collection Chapter 72: Annie
Eliminating the pressure of having an agenda in our marriage brought Brett and me back to where we'd been pre-baby craze. It didn't change the fact that every time my period came, I wondered whether it was a fertilized egg that was unable to implant in my uterus-an unrecognized miscarriage so early on we weren't aware it was a pregnancy-but at least that was only once a month. We tried to resume our social life and just enjoy each other. We spent more and more time with Dan and Lissa, and I had fast developed a strong bond with Dan's girlfriend.We spent most weekends with them, and those we didn't, I talked to Lissa regularly. Dan and Brett joked about how dependent we'd become on each other, but the truth was, I had really connected with her. She knew just about all there was to know about me, except what happened with Will. She knew the gist of it but didn't have any details. Even after all these years, sharing his story still felt like a violation, so when his name came up, I only
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