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Chapter 122: Past
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2022-10-26 14:23:32Related chapters
The Bound Collection Chapter 123
"What do you want me to do, Lissa? I didn't choose my deployment date any more than you chose the date for the trial to start.""I don't have anyone else, Matt. If you're not there, I will be alone.""What is your suggestion? Would you like my Sargent's phone number to see if you can get me an excused absence?" His callous words did nothing to help the situation, and the sarcasm was uncalled for. I sat down hunched over in the kitchen chair with my elbows rested on my knees and my head in my hands. My long hair created a curtain to shield my face, but I didn't bother crying. It wouldn't change the circumstances. "There's no one left." The statement was more an acknowledgment to myself than an invitation for Matt's response."Actions have consequences, Lissa. Yours were the gravest. You think being alone is worse than being dead?"I stood slowly and stared him in the eye. "I think being dead would be the easy way out for me, and I contemplate that route daily. But I'm aware I have
Last Updated : 2022-10-26The Bound Collection Chapter 124
Lindsey secured a contract for full asking price four days after listing it. I removed all pictures so prospective buyers wouldn't know whose house they were looking at. Matt had all but abdicated any responsibility and gave his father his power of attorney to close on the house in his place after Matt deployed...which he did seven days before the trial. He never came back to the house after leaving that night, not to collect any of his things or those that might remind him of Joshua, no pictures, no mementos, nothing. He had washed his hands of me. Two days after Matt left the country, I faced his father for the first time since losing the only other male Nelson. Joshua and Matt were his life, and I dreaded what was to come. I knew I would have Lindsey with me, and the closing attorney would be there, so physically, he couldn't hurt me, but words could be just as damaging. What I hadn't expected was for him to grab me, pull me into his embrace, and sob. He cried for the loss of Josh
Last Updated : 2022-10-26The Bound Collection Chapter 125
Annie and Brett had done the retrieval and fertilization on their own. It seemed awkward to intrude, like it was the equivalent of watching them have sex in some distorted way. The days after were agonizingly slow. The two of us made a point of spending more time together, meeting daily for lunch, but today, the four of us were making the call to find out how many embryos we had to transfer. We all sat anxiously waiting for each other to finish eating, but no one touched their food, and we finally gave in to the call. I tried to concentrate on what the embryologist was telling us, but all I heard was the magic number. Three.That one little word, a simple number-in nine months, Annie and Brett would have a child, and I would have given back to the world what I'd taken. We'd prayed for three; we got three. The signs all pointed toward success. Dan and Brett fired questions at the person on the other end of the call, but Annie caught my attention. Her eyes filled with tears that spi
Last Updated : 2022-10-26The Bound Collection Chapter 126
Two weeks later, I'd gone in for the beta pregnancy test. Today we would get the results. Thankfully, Dan had been forced to go back to work, and I'd resumed my normal schedule, as had Annie and Brett. But today, I stayed home, and Annie called in. We were both far too anxious to bother with our jobs. Annie had spent the morning complaining about Brett and that jackass Gray, who was still lurking in the shadows of her life. I'd warned her not to open that can of worms, but she hadn't listened to me and was now paying the price.I agreed, this time, Brett was out of line. She'd set Gray straight, told him exactly how things were not going to be, but Gray had baited Brett, taunting him to think she'd lied to him. Brett fed into Gray's games, and here it was, wreaking havoc on their marriage. If I were Annie, I'd just apologize and move on, but she refused to budge. I hated for this day to be ruined by something so trivial, but I couldn't deter her. When Brett sent me a text asking if he
Last Updated : 2022-10-26The Bound Collection Chapter 127
Thirty-eight weeks had seemed like a long time the day we sat waiting on the hormone levels, but eighteen weeks later, the time had flown by. I caught myself talking to the baby when no one was around, and caressing my belly. I practically lived with headphones on my stomach in an effort to instill the love of classical music before birth. It wasn't my child, but I wanted to give it so much. There were so many things I wanted to share with him or her but knew I'd never get that chance as a parent. I could only hope I could do it with the time I was guaranteed while I was pregnant, or that Annie and Brett gave me that opportunity when the baby arrived. There's something women aren't prepared for that pregnancy brings, that pre-birth bond that only exists between the mother and child, no one else can ever experience it. While this wasn't my child, the bond was still there. There's never a moment after conception, until birth, the woman is alone. There's another heart beating inside of
Last Updated : 2022-10-26The Bound Collection Chapter 128
Living between two houses, both of which were constantly being shown by real estate agents, while being pregnant with someone else's child, on top of working full time, was becoming too much. As we approached the growth and anatomy ultrasound, my anxiety began to ratchet and concealing it became harder. I had no idea how I'd hide any of it from Dan once we lived together. The hormones and my guilty conscious were creating far more turmoil in my life than I'd anticipated, and my outlets were few and far between. The shower had become my favorite place to cry because it was one of the only times I was ever alone anymore. I'd wanted friends, someone to love me, and I was grateful for them, but I'd been on my own for years, and adjusting had suddenly become difficult. Dan already worried enough about my safety, the baby's, but if he knew the emotional mess I became every morning, he might have a heart attack. I'd stayed at Dan's house more often than not these days for convenience. He
Last Updated : 2022-10-26The Bound Collection Chapter 129: Past
"Lissa, if you two don't get on the road soon, it's going to be too late to leave."My parents owned a beach house on South Padre Island, and I was taking a long weekend to decompress. I didn't usually make the drive alone, but Matt had Drill, and I had to be back at school on Monday. I was exhausted-sleep deprived was a more accurate term-but everything pulled me in different directions, and I'd over-committed myself this semester. I wanted to make a good impression on the new Dean. I wasn't a tenured Professor, and there were always teachers vying for coveted spots on the University's payroll. I loved my job, not just the classes and the lectures, but the ensembles, the private lessons, and the rare gift of a brilliant musician. They were all good, but this year, I'd been impressed by two in particular, and they took up hours of my day. I allocated resources to them they couldn't afford...my time. Both were here on full music scholarships, so they fell to my tutelage by default, but
Last Updated : 2022-10-26The Bound Collection Chapter 130
It was difficult to put the pieces in the order they'd happened, but the lineup of witnesses was called in the order they'd come to the scene, I assumed in an effort to keep the timeline concise for the jury. "Can you state your name and position for the court?" Jethro had his attention first."Drew Sullivan. Andrew Sullivan, sir. I'm a Fire Engineer at Station Twelve on Engine Twelve." He shifted uncomfortably in the hard, wooden chair next to the judge. Each time he spoke, he leaned into the microphone with hesitation, and his left hand automatically went to the back of his neck worrying the muscles I'm sure were tense."How long have you been with the station?" Each attorney either wanted to establish the credibility of the person on the stand or discredit it. These people were fortunate, though; no one was trying to tear apart their words. Jethro wanted to appeal to the depravity of the situation they'd faced that day. He played on their heart in hopes of weakening the jury.I
Last Updated : 2022-10-26
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The Bound Collection Chapter 150: Epilogue
Our story didn't stop at the courthouse. We had dinner with Brett and Annie that night and hovered around their kitchen table. My best friends allowed me to share Joshua with them and gave life to his memory. I showed them the only pictures I still had while holding Alissa in my arms. She smiled up at me as if she knew. That tiny human connected with me on a level she may never understand, but somehow, she knew-without Joshua, she wouldn't be here. Watching her run around with her friends as we celebrated her birth five years later, I couldn't help but think how foolish it would have been to walk away from all of this. Dan and I would never have children, but what we had was far better for us. Annie and Brett were more like siblings than friends, and their kids were amazing. We got to spoil them, take them anywhere we wanted, and send them home. We had family at holidays and special occasions, and we never missed out on anything either Grayson or Alissa were doing. But at the end of
The Bound Collection Chapter 149
I had called repeatedly, but each try had gone straight to voicemail. Either his phone was off, or it died without being charged overnight. I didn't want to speculate about which it was. I drove as quickly as I could and slammed the SUV in park in the first spot I could find before racing into the courthouse. I followed the signs to the Justice of the Peace, but when I reached the office, completely out of breath, Dan was nowhere to be found. The clock on the wall read 10:11 am. My eyes scanned the room, making sure to identify each person as a stranger before moving on to the next face. Surely, he hadn't left after ten minutes. He had to know I'd come. A guy slammed into my shoulder in his haste to rush out of the office, not even bothering to apologize for nearly knocking me over. But standing stock-still in the middle of the doorway probably wasn't the best idea. I just couldn't believe he'd left. I waited for hours for Matt to show up at the hospital, but Dan hadn't waited ten lo
The Bound Collection Chapter 148
My night had been restless, and just as quiet as the evening after Dan and I had gotten out of the bathtub. He left after dinner and went to Brett's house, but I didn't have the courage to ask him what he'd done while he was there. He returned in the same mood he'd left in, the one he was known for. To an outsider, he appeared unwavering-but I knew with time to think about it, he'd decide he couldn't stay."Did you want to get a new dress for tomorrow?" "For what?""To go to the courthouse? Or do you want to do the whole thing off the wall and wear jeans?" He kept unloading the dishwasher like he had asked what I needed from the grocery store. "I didn't think we were still doing that?" Maybe he'd taken up drinking.He turned toward me suddenly, dropping a dishtowel he'd used to dry his hands with. "What are you talking about? You said Monday. Tomorrow is Monday.""Dan...""No, don't Dan me. Has something changed that you don't want to marry me now?"Oh, for the love of God. I
The Bound Collection Chapter 147
I stood in the spot he left me in when he returned with towels from the dryer. He set them on the counter, turned off the water in the now full tub, and removed his clothes. I watched in a trance until he was before me with nothing on. With my hand in his, he stepped over the side of the bathtub and then helped me in. The garden tub was made for two, and I nestled myself between his legs while he leaned back. The bubbles created a cover, hiding our bodies except for the parts of us not under the water. My fingers fidgeted nervously with the white foam until he took my hand and wound his fingers between mine.He might have been waiting for me to start, but I didn't know what to say. The silence was painful, and I ran through the scenarios of how this might play out...none of which ended well."What was his name?" The words of inquiry fanned out against my skin like a warm blanket. They were gentle and softly spoken, inviting me to open up about a piece of me I hadn't shared with anyon
The Bound Collection Chapter 146
We walked into the sanctuary with two minutes to spare. Brett quickly found Dan, and Annie was in a tizzy. Alissa was nestled into a cradle her dad had created with his arm completely unaffected by her father's helpless panic. "Dude, slow down. What's wrong?"I held Dan's hand in front of Brett, but Alissa had my attention. Just as Brett started to answer Dan's question, Annie came around the corner. Her face was flush, and if I had to bet, I'd say she was roughly two minutes from pulling her hair out.I hadn't heard anything Brett said to my fiancé. The moment Annie got close enough, I saw why she was distressed. Grayson had spit up all over his christening gown...and it stunk, even from here.People started to fill the pews. "What do you need me to do, Annie?"Brett stepped in, suddenly relieved and in control. "Nothing. We're good. Dan went to get stuff out of the car."My brow scrunched in confusion. I had no idea what was going on or how Dan was helping."Seriously, Lissa.
The Bound Collection Chapter 145
The time on my phone couldn't be right. There was no way it was a quarter to eight. Somehow in my haste to get to sleep I either hadn't turned on my alarm or had turned it off an hour ago when it rang. I threw the covers back and practically fell out of bed. The thud of my body on the floor woke Dan whose concern, while well intended, only slowed my progress out the door."Let me go. I have fifteen minutes to get to Annie's house, and I had planned to shower before I went."He didn't relinquish his grasp on me once he got up. "Lissa, calm down. You aren't going to do anyone any good in a panic." I relaxed until I felt the tension in his arms subside and then made my break. "I'll be back. Can you get the gifts out of the closet and throw them in the bags on the kitchen counter? There's tissue paper there, too.""Sure, where are they?"I raced around tearing my pajamas off to put on a bra and some real clothes. As much as I loved Brett, I wasn't interested in him seeing any more of
The Bound Collection Chapter 144
"You look like shit, Lissa. Did you have a baby that keeps you up at night, and I missed it?"I swung my attention to Annie to find her giggling to herself. "You don't look so hot yourself, heifer." The wink I shot her direction ensured she saw my playfulness. "I haven't slept all that well the last couple nights." I didn't need to tell her why."Bad dreams?" She'd become a pro at this whole parenting gig. She never missed a beat with either kid and managed to hold completely coherent, adult conversations while breastfeeding one and changing the other. Anyone else would need more hands but not Annie Ryann. "I don't know what it is. Just not getting a lot of rest."She stopped what she was doing and gave me the eye. The one that told me she didn't believe a word I said. I scooped Alissa up and ignored her."Spill it.""There's nothing to spill. I'm just not sleeping well.""Are you nervous about getting married?"Her question was natural, based on the fact that event loomed jus
The Bound Collection Chapter 143
I'd spent most of the summer with Annie, Alissa, and Grayson while Dan and Brett worked. As my vacation neared its end, I got excited about returning to work. I couldn't wait to be around my students again and the music. I dreaded seeing Rob, but hopefully, he'd be somewhat human now that some time had passed. I hadn't heard from him in the time I'd been off except for the email he sent out to the department today about meetings over the next couple weeks. It would be strange being away from the kids. Annie and I were more like co-mothers, with her taking the lead and the long nights. But I'd spent several of those with her as well. I knew how exhausting one infant was...I couldn't leave her alone with two, and Brett still had to work. Maybe it was an excuse to feel like I was an important part of their lives and their team. Maybe it gave me a piece of what I'd lost years earlier. Either way, I found myself having to be pried away from them. When I told Annie to let me know if I got
The Bound Collection Chapter 142
The addition of Alissa Danielle to our tribe had been profound. I loved being able to walk across the driveway to relieve my friend in the morning so she could shower, take a nap, or whatever else she was in the mood to do. I didn't care what it was. I'd help her with laundry, cleaning, anything to keep her from experiencing the sleep deprivation that had caused the end of the world I knew. It was twice as bad for her because with each passing day, she became more pregnant and less able to move...or stay awake. I took advantage of the time she granted me with Alissa and tried to maintain the bond the two of us shared. I knew it would change over time, but I hoped as she grew older it would strengthen in different ways. I wanted to be her friend, her confidant, her second mom. In the few weeks she'd been alive, Dan and I both had fallen head over heels for her. But at the end of each day, we got to go next door, have sex as loudly as we wanted to, stay out until all hours of the night
