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Chapter 5: New dream

Author: KaraseyDee
last update Last Updated: 2025-01-15 20:53:03

Emma’s pov

“Do you hear me Emma, if you leave then don’t ever come back,” Conan yelled.

I held on as tightly as I could to my bag and continued walking.

“Please don’t go, please don’t leave him,” he pleaded. But how can I stay?

I saw the way he looked at me, he will never be able to trust me again.

He called our baby my baby.

Yes, I could stay here and give birth and then have a DNA test done on the baby.

I am a 100% sure that this baby I am carrying is mine and Conan’s baby.

But I will be honest, I am angry that he refuses to believe me when I tell him it’s a misunderstanding.

I tried to explain to him that I think someone planned all of this, but he doesn’t believe me.

All he sees or hears when I say those words is a woman trying to justify or hide her mistakes.

Not only that, I know that it will die down but let’s be honest nothing is ever really gone from the internet.

He might get rid of it, but what will happen when our child grows up and is being called names.

Not only that, but the place that was once home for me was now suffocating me.

It’s not just the house but also this city, I am suffocating in this place and there is nothing I can do.

Not only that, but I can see that he is also hurting as well.

And let’s be honest, the world isn’t kind to men as it is to women.

If a woman stays with a man that cheated on her then nothing is said.

It has become such a norm that people don’t even care about.

Especially in Conan’s social circle, rich men have affairs all the time.

But the same is not done for men who stay with women that cheated on them.

I have seen the comments on social media calling him names.

This has completely turned our lives up and down and honestly I am just tired.

I hardened my heart and the moment I stepped out of my home my knees gave out.

I had to steady myself as I got up and just started walking.

I got a cab and asked them to take me to the nearest bus station.

I sat there for hours; I can’t stay in this city anymore.

There is nothing left for me here but pain.

I hope that Conan will understand why I had to leave.

I have always been like this; I have always been a coward.

I run away when things get too much for me.

I only had my handbag which had important documents and credit cards.

I looked around the boards to see if there is any bus available and where it was going.

The only one left was a bus to a small town that is about 4 hours away from here.

I bought the ticket and went to the bus and took my seat.

As the bus started moving I found myself smiling when I was a massive billboard.

And on that billboard was my dearest husband. His family practically owns this city so staying here wouldn’t be good for me.

Everywhere I go I will find him; he is the love of my life, but I am just tired now.

I am leaving everything behind now, my friend and my dreams were also here.

I closed my eyes and the first time we came to live in this city came to mind.

Flashback

“The apartment is a little crappy,” I said, and Maddie chuckled.

“A little, this is bad,” she said, and I smiled as I looked around.

“I know, but this is our first ever home. There is no one who can tell us what we can do here. No curfew or anything like that,” I said, and she smiled.

“I love the no curfew part, plus we can actually decorate for Christmas,” Maddie said, and I nodded.

I looked outside our window and all I could see is how big the city is.

Our orphanage was just a little outside the city and we would occasionally come here using a train.

But during those times we would only explore near the train station so we wouldn’t get lost.

Plus, since we had curfew we had to rush and then go back home.

“So how is your new job huh? Teaching kids art, sounds fun,” Maddie said, and I just shrugged.

“It is, I managed to find a job that combines two of my favourite things. Kids and art,” I said, and she looked at me.

“You always said that you don’t want a family, but you love kids. So why don’t you want kids of your own?” she asked me.

“Because the kids I teach are only my responsibility at school, not in life,” I explained and the sighed.

“You see, I don’t want to risk bringing a life into this world and have it suffer,” I tried to explain but she frowned.

“You will just find a good man or woman to be with.

Get married and have kids, how would the kids suffer? Isn’t that the dream? A white picket fence and all?” she asked me, and I shook my head.

“Things happen, look at us. Our parents aren’t anywhere to be seen and because of that we grew up in that horrible place. Had they not given birth to us, then we wouldn’t have suffered as much as we have,” I explained.

“You talk as if your kids will be orphaned like we were, that isn’t going to happen,” she said, and I shrugged.

“I can’t risk it. Plus, haven’t you heard that the earth is dying, ice glaciers are melting, and volcanoes are erupting. The ozone layer is getting thinner by the day,” I said.

She rolled her eyes at this and then looked at me.

“I think that you are just scared,” she said, and I rolled my eyes.

“That is exactly what I have been saying. I am scared of bringing an innocent life into this fucked up world,” I said, and she shook her head.

“I think you are scared that you wouldn’t be a good mother. We didn’t have any mother figures so you are scared that you wouldn’t know how to parent,” Maddie said.

“That is also true, but the other reasons still have a hand in my decision,” I said, and she rolled her eyes.

“I believe you,” she said, and I smiled at this. Honestly, I never want to have kids in this life.

End of flashback

I touched my belly and I found myself smiling.

You were not a part of my dream, but I would die for you.

I am leaving everything behind for you, so that you can live a good life.

Someone is out to get me, and I don’t want to risk them coming after you.

You are now my new dream little one, will you forgive mommy for leaving dad behind?

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