“Stop making me feel like there’s something wrong with me for it. I’m not cool with that. I hate when you say it.” I point out, breaking my mild temper and sighing, that this topic brought a real issue I had not even considered to my doorstep.Sex.My heart sinks now that it’s glaringly obvious and in my face and a hurdle we have to cross.Dane is used to it, seems to have it frequently and I am so not even close to being someone ready to take that step. I haven't even thought about it and what having a boyfriend changes, given I don’t want to go there yet. That’s a whole other thing I never considered in what we were starting. I don’t even know when he expects it.Is it weird to want him, want to date him, but not want to have sex with him? The mere thought of sex gives me sweats and has my heart palpitating in cold-blooded fear.“There’s nothing wrong with it….I’m sorry…. I’ll stop. It’s a non-issue.” Dane slides closer to me, lifting his hand to trace a thumb across my cheek before
Dane leads the way to the two over-plumped cream sofas in our TV lounge and heads to put the glasses on the center oak coffee table. In here, it’s comfy and peaceful and not that big a room, and as he swoops to turn on a channel, I know it’s in case anyone comes home and wonders why we are in here together. It’s not like we often hang out to watch a show together, if ever. He sets it to medium volume, just enough to cover our voices should we fail to hear anyone return, like Monique or my mom. And can confidently say this is all easily explainable should a surprise parent walk in.“So….” he finally turns, watching how I slide down into the comfiness of stuffed seating and follows to sit beside me. The way we are turned has us knee to knee, yet it somehow feels closer.“So…” the nervousness still lingers, and my hands get clammier, my chest heaving because this is making me weirdly antsy. It feels like we have reached the step off point to things getting real. “I guess we figure this
“If you know how….have ability…then why have you been jumping on me for every class project since forever? Why not just do the work?” I snap, somehow incensed that all thesi time he let me believe he was incapable and uneducated and he could do it all this time. “You’ve been acting dumb, lazy, and lying this whole time.”Dane shrugs, leans back to his previous position, and lounges with an infuriating gleam in his eye.“Hey…I never once said I couldn’t do the work, just that I didn’t want to…that’s not a lie… Besides, I got to bug you and hang out…I also didn’t give my dad any reason to act like a proud father of the year… really, Babe… I gave you a chance to shine and become the family's golden child.”“You’re….” The words die on my tongue, and I exhale in sheer frustration at this stubborn ass and his flawed logic. Annoyed by him and his outright arrogance.“Smarter than I look? I know….sexier than you want to admit? True…. Pissing you off….for sure, but I still like you. Don’t be m
“Are you not feeling well, honey? You have barely touched your food.” My mom breaks my daydreamy gaze at the half-finished meal I was pushing around with my fork, and I sit up in guilty response. Clearing my throat and pasting on a brighter, less zoned-out expression. I had been lost in my mind as everything that happened today caught up with me. I feel like I’m in the twilight zone.“What, um no…I’m just tired and not that hungry.” I try not to glance to my left where Dane is sitting, seeing as he decided to join us for dinner tonight after we spent an hour making out on the couch before anyone came home. The guilt and awkwardness in me are strong, and I’m not convinced my mom cannot see a change in me or suspect my chapped lips were not from forgetting lip balm like I told her.I guess I am partly sitting here like a zombie because I’m trying to adjust to this bare-faced lie of an existence now we are all together. When she got home, I had to lie to her to explain my disheveled appe
Dane lets me hold onto his arm and wrist as I slide from behind him on that thundering torpedo he calls a bike. Thanking the powers above, we got here in one piece. My legs are a little Bambi on ice, given I have just been through the most exhilarating yet frightening journey of my life and was only finally starting to get used to it when we arrived.“How was it? Still think it’s a deathtrap?” Dane Smirks, sliding my visor up for me after hauling off his helmet and ruffling his hair back to its chaotic sexy before leaning in to help me with the strap of mine which I’m already fumbling with. I stay still while he unclips it under my chin with practiced hands, staring at how handsome he looks when focused on doing so.“Verdict is still out, although, for the last ten minutes, I didn’t feel like I was clinging on for dear life or about to have a stroke. It sort of got okay.” I point out, unable to admit that after I got used to how to mold to him as we turned and moved and that the speed
“Can you even do that?... Stay out of trouble, I mean?” I ask in utter seriousness, given Dane, who I know is always in trouble. “I have the motive to learn….after tying myself to the school good girl for the considerable future, I am in very real danger of becoming single otherwise, and I am only discovering the joys of a girlfriend. I have to learn fast how to behave.” He jests, loosening his hold to slide his hand back down to mine to return to our previous position to tug me towards the water. “As long as you remember, the goal is you being a better human and student and not corrupting me.” I point out, sass returning now my moment of doubt is passing.“Never…I happen to like you the way you are….even if I know for a fact you probably don’t even know what beer tastes like, need careful handling most of the time, and own zero sexy lingerie.”“Hey,” I slap out at him for what seems to be an insult, getting triggered by his immature chuckle as he dodges me and jumps away. Letting g
“You look tired.” Elisa slides down beside me in our first class of the day, given she told me not to wait for her this morning as she was running late. Seemingly fresh and bright-eyed this morning, I am wafted with a new subtle banana smell that has me smiling. It’s been a while since she created something new and I was starting to think Tyler had made her lose her mojo.“I didn’t get much sleep…I am so wiped out today.” I add, turning to sniff her appreciatively and grin hard when she produces a bottle right in front of my face. Small and yellow, a spray pump with a lemon liquid inside and a cutesy banana logo she obviously designed. Elisa takes great care in every part of product design.“It’s a body mist. Try it and let me know what you think. Especially how long it lasts.” Elisa settles down to unpack, satisfied with my eager nod, and I stop what I am doing to examine the little bottle, pop off the lid, and spray myself eagerly.It’s like drenching yourself in the best parts of a
“You’re mad? Upset? Is it because of Maria? Nothing is happening there…. I told you not to take anything to heart that happens at school. We’re just being who we normally are. You are the girl I like and want. Nothing changes that. Xxx”His words break me down further, a wave of real, heartfelt tears at my foolishness drowning me. It’s like he found exactly the right words to catch the free-running, insecure bunny in my chest and pushed it back down its dark hole.Dane being so sweet and trying to soothe me from afar has me all kinds of messed up, and I wallow in shame and hurt, allowing myself a few seconds to cry.Even while gulping down stilted sobs and sniffing to control the worst of my breakdown, I try to type some coherent response, knowing for sure now I am being dumb. Desperate to explain to him because now he feels guilty for me being an idiot.“You called her Babe…. Yesterday you….. I start typing, then stop myself and genuinely pause, halting the flow of tears to ask myse
Dane almost catapults out of the bed. Grips my shoulder with one hand as I move in and suck the tip into my mouth and lets out a groan that almost makes me climax. Its so primal and raw and empowering.He tastes slightly salty, smooth, hard, and yet also good. Hard and thick, and I can barely get comfortable around him with my lips as this is such an alien sensation for me. Not sure if I should be doing anything else except sucking him like a lollipop. It’s not like I have ever watched it be done and only heard girls at school talking about it.How hard can it be?“Kayla….you don’t have…oh fuck…” His words die off as I find my way around what I'm doing, having no clue if it's even right. I suck him some more, explore him with my tongue and lips and take moments to experience this new feeling. Mentally wondering how far into my mouth he should be because I don’t want to end up gagging and throwing up all over him. Better to play it safe and keep only the first inch of him in there and
“You’re scarily quiet. What are you thinking about?” Dane and I are lying face to face in the dark, under the sheets in bed, and curled up together so we’re nose to nose. It’s been maybe twenty minutes of this, and I’m frustrated that I don’t feel any better.It’s like my confidence and security have taken a knock, and my heart is yearning for some extreme way to feel back to how I was an hour ago. Some deep emotional need to have him wipe away my hurt.“I’m fine…just…” I exhale heavily and curl into his body some more, resting my temple against his neck and inhaling his familiar scent. I can’t put into words the weird residual melancholy that tonight has left me. Maybe it was the realization that Dane alone has the power to destroy my heart should he ever actually betray me like that, and it’s made me feel small and vulnerable. Trusting someone with your soul in that way.Maybe it's being slapped with the reality that he has had sex with girls before, had some connection and relation
I mean, she’s smaller than me and tiny in frame, so there’s no way she was able to attack him to the extent of leaving kisses on his body and opening his clothes without his being able to stop her. I was in the bathroom for like ten minutes, so I'm sure he had plenty of time to get something started before I came out. Maybe he heard me coming, and that’s why he was cooling it off again.What am I thinking?Do I really think he would cheat on me?I don’t know anymore, not after seeing that.He’s been acting weird with that girl all night and has been actively avoiding her without any explanation about who she is. She's the one person he never introduced me to. Maybe those should have been the warning signs from the first minute she arrived. Maybe his distance and avoidance were to hide something between them and not that he didn’t want to see her.“Kayla, stop.” Dane tries to grab me from behind a second time as I get up into the room and twist out of his grip. I push him away as hard
The party is in full swing now it’s late, and despite my earlier weirdness over that girl, I am enjoying myself even if I have kept her in my peripheral way more than I should have. These people are easy to get along with, and despite this idea that I was walking into a frat party and bracing myself for it kicking off, it ended up being way more of a hang-out and chill session. It made so much more sense to me why Dane and Tyler frequently hang out with them because it’s nothing like teen boy chaos and wild orgies that I expected. Given Dane admitted most of his image was fake I can now see how he got away with it for so long without creating more mayhem. IF taking off for a party weekend was coming here to do this, then he’s way less rebellious than he pretended to be.Tyler, on the other hand, saying these parties get wild…was clearly joking.We started on the beach with food, music, and volleyball for a few hours. Laughing and getting sand in places that didn’t feel all that great
“Do I look okay?” Elisa blinks at me, the sweet, doe-eyed return of insecurity about her looks as I make her give me a twirl in front of my jeep. Admiring my goddess with the pride of a mother who may as well of birthed her myself.“Gorgeous, baby….. absolutely radiant.” Beaming, I take in the short and tailored dark green dress we picked for her. It’s flat, smooth satin, but the little cap sleeves and scooped neckline are green velvet in a shade a tad darker than the rest. Simple, elegant, and showcases her tall, lean figure and ample bust with curves in all the right places. Her red hair is a satin curtain of softness, held back from her face with a simple dark green velvet Alice band she chose, and her makeup is the trademark vintage I gave her. Tyler almost had an instant orgasm when he laid eyes on my beauty earlier, so I don’t know why she’s doubting her look now we’re here.“I don’t look immature?” She flushes a darker shade of pink and gets a hip nudge from me before looping h
“What about…Happy eighteenth, Kayla….Happy birthday, Baby. I was adamanet I wouldn’t stay longer than today.” He pecks me on the lips as the realization hits me that he’s right. It’s four am and my birthday. I went to bed, not even thinking about that, only seeing him and completely blanked midnight passing us by. I’m again the same age as he is and technically a legal adult.I think it’s the first birthday of my life. I wasn't sitting watching for my dad’s text in hopes he remembered or eagerly counting the minutes until I turned a year older. I didn't even think about it at all.“I am.” Even I sound surprised.“You are…we both are, and I have something for you.” Dane leans away further, forcing me to drop my hands back down onto the bed to let him go as he kneels up over the top of me. Legs on either side of mine but he puts no weight on me. Instead he unzips his leather jacket and crosses his arms in a cute little way so he points at each pocket on the sides. Seeing him with a litt
‘We’re in our street so I won’t be long. As soon as I get in, I’ll take my luggage to my room to give my dad time to go to bed, and then I’ll hop your balcony. Can’t wait to see you xxx.’It’s four am, and I have been dozing on and off for hours while watching my cell and waiting for Dane’s text. Unable to let myself fall asleep fully in case he thinks I’m not eager to see him, and I don’t want to miss his moment of getting home. I’m half asleep, and the vibration makes me jump, scanning the words twice and blinking as it sinks in that he’s here. He’s home or will be in a few minutes.Three weeks of endless waiting and my boy is finally back.I can’t wait. Scooting out of bed, I grab my short, baby pink lightweight robe to cover my skimpy vest and shorts and hightail it across my room. Open the door as quietly as possible because my mom is in bed across the hall and slide out before closing it tight. My nerves are hitched, which makes me weirdly breathless, and even though my heart is
I have a boyfriend to impress. I can’t have every other girl there look sexy for him and me being a frump in some boring outfit.“I’ll figure it out. What are you wearing?” I let it go for now, watching the two about fifteen feet away setting up for a new game with less interest and waving my hand in the air. I am so over playing now we’ve been here for hours.“Don’t add me in this time…. I’ll sit one out and watch you too,” I yell to them to catch Tyler’s attention and get a nod of okay. Dane calling me meant they took my turns the last few shots to leave me over here, so it’s not a shock. I want to sit one out and spend more time talking to him. I feel like a third wheel anyway, with how cutesy they are today. If I stay out of their way, they can forget I am here and have an actual one-on-one date. Something Elisa has been weirdly evasive of, so I guess her training wheels have not come off all the way yet. She likes me there as security even though she obviously doesn’t need me her
“Hey, Babycakes, what are you doing?” Dane’s honey-laden voice croons down the cell to me, a sign he’s not with his mom, seeing he's not trying to be quiet and sounds relaxed, probably in his hotel room.“Watching my best friend pretend she can’t throw a bowling ball so her boyfriend manhandles her while giving a lesson. I swear she’s not the same girl who beats me at this game every time we come.” Focusing on Elisa's play pretend inability is amusing, even if I am shocked she had the gall to put on the pitiful act to get cuddly.She sure is learning fast how to wind Tyler around her little finger.It's only mid-afternoon, but the ten-pin bowling alley is relatively busy, although we managed to blag a corner alley so I could hide in the shadows on the seats here. We’ve been here a while, on our third or fourth game, and I'm happy to sit back and let those two treat it as a date.“You should take tips from her…it wouldn’t hurt to have you soften up and act helpless occasionally to brin