"What do you want, Dane?" I shove his overly heavy arm from my shoulder and elbow him in the ribs to get him off me. I can't stand his lounging on me casually like I'm another one of his endless girlfriends.
"Can't I walk my sister into school without being accused of ulterior motives?" He smirks down at me from his much taller height, too close for comfort, all bright white teeth, great bone structure, and grey eyes that seem to drive the hormonal teens here crazy. It grinds my eternal gears with irritation.
"For one, I'm only your sister when you want something. Two … you always have a motive when you are being nice to me." I point out, shrug off his second attempt at slinging an arm around me and bat him with my schoolbag instead. Not caring if I injure him in any way. I’d rather not have him near me on any given day of the week.
"Kayla, honey….sweetest little step-sibling of mine. You are my favorite sister and always have been. How can you be so untrusting?" he smirks, that devilish side on show.
"I'm your only sister… only step-sibling. Therefore, that doesn't mean anything. I wouldn’t trust you as far as I could throw you, and with your weight, that wouldn’t be far at all." I walk faster to outrun him, annoyed that other students are starting to notice their godlike leader has appeared and his fan club of moping girls are waving this way. Eyes on us – prying, gossiping.
The one thing I hate about high school is the non-original behavior and cliché groups of kids like this who flock to a handsome face and good body and treat him them a superstar for winning the gene lottery. It’s sad that even in 2022, we still value people on how good-looking they are.
"Kayla…. baby. Don't make me pull out the big guns." Dane catches me by the back of my shoulders in a strong grip, bringing me to a sudden halt, and spins me so fast I almost topple over and end up nose butting him in the center of his overly amped up chest from too much gym time. It feels like I get my face splatted against brick, and my eyes water over with the sudden stinging pain it causes.
"Ouch!" I snap in irritation, shoving him hard in the abs to make him move back, shaking him off my shoulders to rub my face, and glaring at him with fury beginning to grow. An internal brewing storm of anger because normally, I prefer my mornings to be Dane-free.
"What is it? What now? Spit it out and leave me alone before kids actually think we like each other. I know you want something, as it’s the only time you bother acknowledging my existence!" I stomp at him and fix my bag and blazer, smoothing out clothes to avoid the way he's eyeing me up in that practiced playboy manner he has. He's in full seduction mode, the charm and smiles for my benefit are fake, and he has a request I will refuse.
He straightens up, pats me on both shoulders, then brushes imaginary dust off my lapel before fixing a smile on his face and tilting his head to look cute. My stomach tightens with rage, and I narrow my eyes further. I’m no stranger to his tactics. I see him use them all day long on his line of playthings.
"Add my name to your project notes. So I don't fail another class. I'll grant you any wish you desire, my sweet little munchkin…. and I won’t tell anyone you’re still a virgin." He beams full charm offensive, that last insult thrown in because he can never truly veer from being an asshole, yet I scowl back.
It may be true, but I hate that he always uses it as a weapon whenever his charms fail.
"No… you were supposed to help in the group project you were in. You didn't. You slack off, do nothing, and expect credit for a grade you don't even care about. No…No…NO! Take your threats and go away. I don’t care. It’s nothing to be ashamed of, even at seventeen." I push him away, turn fast, so my hair flicks him in the neck, and move to storm off, but he lassoes me from behind in a headlock and hauls me back against a hard body, trapping me and nearly choking me at the same time.
"Koolaboo….. little sis… pure untouched goodness and light….. Dad says if I don't pull my grades up, he will pack me off to live with my mom in London to go to some stuffy private school. You'd miss me."
"No, I wouldn't." I wriggle to escape him to no avail. Getting flustered and wrinkled and despising him all the more.
Dane sighs, tucking his head against my cheek from behind forcefully and cuddling up annoyingly so that he has a few heads turning our way in confusion. I can’t ever fight him off when he gets handsy, given he’s over six feet of pure muscle, and I am barely clearing five foot four of not much body fat. Everyone knows Dane and I are always at one another's throats, so this show of affection is strange.
I'm even weirded out by being trapped in his biceps and suffocated with whatever shower gel, aftershave combo he uses. It's not bad. It's one of those smells that makes you forget how to think properly and clings to your senses after he walks off. I swear this boy's entire style, persona, and manner is a practiced tick list of how to be the school hot boy, making my skin crawl. We couldn't be any more different if we tried.
"Let me go.” I squirm and fight, but his limbs only tighten, and I become almost immobile. “People are staring."
"Say yes or I'll keep us like this all the way into class and maybe even amp it up some more. I'm not against sitting you in my lap. It’s about time I declared my love for my sister and showed her so much more affection."
"I hate you," I grit through my teeth, shuffling forward awkwardly with this dead weight on my back as he does not attempt to walk properly and cannot get free. “I swear, Dane, I will suffocate you in your sleep if you do not let me go. My room is right next to yours. I know how to get in without waking you.” No amount of wriggling, struggling, and jerking loosen his octopus limbs.
“I’m into that, but I never took you for a kinky one, Lil sis.” He bumps my butt with his groin, and I yelp in disgust and attempt a stamp at his foot, but he’s too quick for me.
“You’re disgusting.” I snort.
I hear the smirking breathy chuckle, which is almost his trademark nowadays, and can envision a smug look even if I cannot see it.
"It's just adding one name… won't affect your grade or anyone else's. It will get dad off my back and less drama with your mom….we both know you hate drama at home." He croons, all husky-voiced, deep, and I know this is his baby way of swooning all the braindead girls he has his claws in. He is attempting to sway me, but he is right about stress at home.
Him and my mom butting heads twenty-four seven since he moved in five months ago has made home tense and a horrible place to be when they are together. His dad has zero control over him and lets him do whatever he wants, while my mum is an endless nag. His dad is overcompensating for divorcing his mother, and my mom hates everything about how he has been raised. Everything about how he talks, walks, dresses, behaves, lives…. you name it, and my mom will find fault in him. Home used to be my haven; now, I feel like it’s become a battle zone, which is partly why I cannot stand him.
"For god's sake. Will you go away and leave me alone for the next two years if I say yes? Let me graduate without crossing paths again, and let me have a quiet life?"
There’s a pause as he considers it, and then he loosens a little.
"Maybe. We're in the same classes, so…. fuck it, sure. Say yeah, and I'll stay out of your way, Virgin."
That little thrown-in ‘nickname’ he has for me irks me and riles my already frayed temper. Being a virgin is not a sin or a crime and nothing to be ashamed of. He wouldn’t know, though, as he sleeps with everything that shows interest and only hangs out with girls who bang everyone too.
"You know, if you stopped screwing around and did the actual work, you wouldn't need to blackmail me and piggyback my grades whenever there's a group project. You're not stupid… your grades used to be better than mine. You just spend too much time looking in the mirror and dating brainless women." My tone is harsh and a little too loud for such a quiet morning in our school walkway, but he knows how to push my buttons.
He finally releases me, and I spin on him, shoving him hard in the chest, but it does nothing. Not even a step back, all I get is that side smirk and wink as he brushes his hair out of his eye and lounges casually once more."And lose my excuse to cuddle up with my favorite girl? Hell no…. torturing you is my only joy in life. Anyway, why would I want to do a stupid thing like make my dad proud?" He shrugs with one shoulder and swings his backpack from one side to the other in a suave move that has the nearby coven of watchers swooning and probably dampening their panties. I eyeroll and turn on my heel to walk away from him. So done with this conversation and seething that yet again, I caved and agreed to something for this idiot just for a peaceful life. I hate that he knows how to get at me."Your rebellion is getting old and boring. It's been almost a decade, and you are still trying to disappoint him as punishment for marrying my mom…. Grow up. Some of us moved on." I sneer, angri
“Where is he? I told him to be here for six, and it’s twenty past! He always has to defy everything we ask of him.” My mom snaps, slamming her fork down on the table by her plate, making everything rattle despite being solid oak and everyone sits tensely as her voice echoes around the giant dining room. “I am so sick of this.”My mum's shoulder-length blonde highlighted hair falls gracefully over her right eye, so she flicks it back with manicured nails. She still looks like a woman in her young thirties and not her mid-forties. Barely has a wrinkle or blemish on her delicate face. Her cheekbones are rosier than normal, even on her sallow skin, and I watch my mom's beauty and elegance with awe, impressed by it even when she’s pissed off.Elisa withdraws further into her hair, so her fork seems to be delivering food into a veil where food disappears, and my stepfather sighs at the head of the table and checks his watch for the fifth time. It’s only the four of us as we wait for Dane,
“Are you not going to wish your father a happy birthday?”And so it begins.I hate conflict like this. My mom doesn’t even give him a second to settle, tension crackling in the air around her with her snappy tone, and the steak in my mouth suddenly feels like I’m chewing ash. Churning up my stomach as my nerves tighten, and for once, I wish my mom would leave it alone.“Yeah…. happy getting older…. power to you,” Dane smirks his dad’s way, with no sincerity, and Bryan nods with a half-smile as if to say thank you. Dane waits until he sees Tyler being served food before he starts to dig in, obviously done with his well wishes. I shake my head at his lack of effort, praying my mom lets it go and stuff food in my mouth to curb the need to call him an asshole.“Can’t you do something properly and respectfully for once?”I sigh inwardly at her voice.My mom could never back down and let it go where he’s concerned, just had to bite.“He’s your father….. don't you have a gift? Something more
I kick rocks on the road, mood simmering and feeling listless as I make my way back up the huge, curved drive to our house after walking Elisa home. It’s getting dark because I hung out at hers for a while to pass the time and give my so-called family a chance to get over their current fight. Elisa made me dinner, and we avoided all talk of earlier, seeing as it was not the first time. I’m tired and looking to go to my room to catch up on study notes before bed. I have a test tomorrow in English lit.As I round the bend obscured by the bushes of our manicured garden, I catch sight of Dane coming this way, hands shoved in the pockets of his jeans, head down and kicking at debris the same way I am as he walks. He’s changed from his school clothes into that rumpled, badass casual he prefers. Light ripped jeans, a white Tee under an open check shirt with graffiti embroidery across a shoulder and one side. His hair is freshly ruffled, and he’s sporting all the metal he usually wears in his
“If you hated your dad as much as you say you do, you would be long gone… I don’t think you do. I think you want to be here and act like this, so he spends all his time and attention dealing with your bull. You’re just an angry little boy who can’t forgive him yet still wants his love.”“Gimme a break… what are you a shrink like your mom now? Trying to psychoanalyze me?” He laughs at me, a breathy bro chuckle, and shakes his head as though I’m hilarious. Still infuriating with his hands in his pocket pose and casual lounge. “Newsflash, she sucks at her job, and you’re mini-me attempt is as sad as she is. You don’t know anything.”“Yes, I do, and don’t talk about my mom like that. She’s an amazing doctor and does it well. She tries hard to make this work. You just…”“No, she doesn’t. You’re as deluded as she is if you see how she is and think that is her trying to make this work.” Dane yanks his shirt from my hand, where I was unaware I was still gripping it, and steps away from me. “I
“Why are you cooking?” Dane startles me from behind as he walks in, dumping his school bag on the breakfast island, and looks me up and down with a slight arrogance. It makes me bristle all over, given it’s the first thing he has said to me in two days, and it’s not exactly a pleasant tone. Dressed in his uniform still, be it rumpled and untucked like always, so I guess he was at Tyler's until now as school got out two hours ago.“Mum and dad are out, and Monique has a headache, so I told her I would make us dinner,” I answer flatly, ignoring him, and continue turning the meatballs for the pasta. I am hot and sweaty from slaving in here and not in the mood for his dickishness.“Can you even cook?” He sneers, walks up, and leans over my shoulder to stare at what I am doing, getting a little too near for comfort, so his body heat envelopes me from behind, and I elbow him back. Suffocated by his presence, especially when he smells like he is freshly showered and has a new dose of afters
“Dad, can you please reply to me or call me back? It feels like I haven’t heard from you in weeks, and I’m worried about your lack of response. Please, daddy, we have a break coming up in school, and I wanted to see you….. call me back” I hang up and stare at my cell for a moment, a lump lodging in my throat as emotions rise to make my chest ache and then face it down on the table and calm myself with a deep breath. Trying not to let this get to me or show my broken disappointment.I realize Dane isn’t continuing the motion of lifting his fork or turning pages and glance up to see him watching me silently. His eyes dart away, and he drops his head back to his previous focus when he sees I noticed but doesn’t say a word. He acts like he didn’t hear me, even though I know he has before, and flicks to the next page. It embarrasses me that he sees it so clearly and silently judges me, probably calling me pathetic and a loser in his head.What does he know?He has never had to deal with th
“I printed off the class notes for each of you. Take them home, work through them and highlight anything you want to elaborate on tomorrow.” I instruct my study group, sliding out the paperclipped pages to each one, and Elisa slides half the pile from them to pass to the next table.We’re in the library on the second floor, taking our class free period as a time to catch up on biology. This is how I use any free time I get during school hours, unlike some I could mention. My entire existence is about doing well and getting the grades I need to go to Harvard when I graduate, so becoming our class president and the study group leader for our year feels like an achievement.“These are well laid out and really helpful, Kayla. Thank you.” Jordan, a boy from my class, flashes a shy smile, giving me those puppy dog eyes he sometimes has for me. I know he’s had a crush on me since junior year, but I don’t have time for boys. As nice as he is, I don’t need the distraction of dating.He's not u
“Deal…. I want my boyfriend back how he was. I don’t want to remember any of this shitty separation. Can we get back together?” I ask stupidly even though it’s obvious we are already making up. I just need him to say the words to help with the insecurity I am feleing after how cold he was. “I want my boyfriend back.”“Technically, babycakes, we never broke up. Neither of us said the words so we don’t need to get back together. He shrugs like this is the most logical thing ever, and I lean back to scowl at him.He does not get out of his asshole past four weeks that easily. The boy really is trying to pull a fast one.“Really?” I ask in obvious, oozing sarcasm. “Because I remember clearly a certain boy telling me he was going no contact and not coming back from the UK before he blocked me on absolutely everything….that was a very final break up even if you never said ‘the words.’ You can’t be in a relationship with someone who moved abroad and refuses to communicate with you.” I point
“I have been needing this for the past month,” Dane murmurs into my cheek, squeezing me half to death, and lifts me off my feet to further crush my ribcage and plants a kiss right in front of my ear before dropping me back down. I can feel that for him, much like me, this is something we have both longed for.This feeling of home and getting back security, safety, and a special intimacy of being with hat one person who can make your world seem right. Like sinking into a hot bath or being cocoonedin a fluffy blanket on a cold day. I can barely contain the elation and the need to sob into his chest because of how much I have missed him. Even though he’s here, holding me, it causes an aching pain to shoot through my heart, and my whole body throbs with intensity.“I missed you so much I felt like I was dying,” Dane murmurs, his voice husky and ravaged with emotion, into my ear before pulling back so we’re separate facially, but our bodies remain glued together. “I needed to see you so ba
It sounds familiar. My reaction to my mom and how much hate and resentment I felt at that time, knowing she did this to us but, also lied and kept it a secret. I can imagine what Dane felt and how awful it must have been. I lived it and know how crazy I felt going through that realization. It breaks your trust and stability to have your own mom break your heart.“And then what? You got it back and decided I didn’t need an explanation, only a goodbye?” Emotion aches my throat as I say it, hating that he so easily cut me off like I didn’t matter. Not sounding angry but deflated because, understanding aside, he still did that to me.“That was the hardest text I have ever sent in my life. You have to believe me - it’s not what I wanted….. She agreed to give me back my cell for limited hours in the evenings on the condition. That I blocked all contact with you… Her and my dad convinced me how selfish I was in holding onto you. That we could never be together and that I would only ruin your
It’s five am, and I am walking while I ball a fist into my mouth to stifle a yawn, climbing the stairs to my room in a semi-dark house as most of the curtains are still drawn. Monique hasn’t started her day yet and won’t know I am even home. Elisa had school today, so I figured I would get out of her hair and come home to vegetate in my house while I figure out what I am meant to do about my mom and Bryan. My mom thinks I’m sick, so for now, the food runs will be on Monique, and I can hide until I know what to do.I have barely slept and tossed and turned most of the night, so getting up this early was not exactly a hardship. I was already awake. Numb and exhausted, and when I did sleep, it was bizarrely messed up dreams about Dane being in the hospital instead of Bryan, and I kept jump-scaring myself awake in panic. Sweating and reaching for him like I was about to lose him.Upstairs is eerily silent with zero lights or noise as my mom has been sleeping at the hospital. Dane's bedroo
“Here.” Elisa slides down beside me on her bed where I have been sobbing to her for the last hour, pushing the warm cup of cocoa into my free hand. I’m clutching a wad of tissues with the other, looking pathetic and snotty, blotchy and red-faced. Sniffing chaotically and gulping as the last evidence of my almighty emotional breakdown fades back into calm. I feel like I have been hit by a train.I guess I had been holding so much inside concerning the paternity test that it finally came to a head. I had been ignoring its existence, trying not to wait for it as deep down, I had resigned myself to believing there was no hope. So, seeing it and knowing it was all for nothing somehow broke me.Not just in a painful way, but I get a sense of relief, and that is as equally overwhelming as the tension I have been holding in a tight ball finally coming undone. I cried not just for loss but for the removal of some of that weighty pressure.“Are you feeling a little better?” She softly smiles, b
Overwhelming sadness strangles me that all it could have taken was him staying for one part of this to come out unscathed. Waiting with me while we figured this out and got the tests together. If we had any sense, we would have just had his DNA tested with mine. To see we were not brother and sister in those first few days.But he left me.“It’s not mine, it’s his… give it to him.” I nod Dane’s way, unable to look at him, unable to see them together now I know for sure we are not related. We are so broken.I don’t wait for a response. Pulling my bag against me and clutching my cell to my chest. I can’t.A second wave of tears and anger mixed up in a confusing mishmash hurts my chest and ribs and makes breathing harder, so I feel like I am dying. I fast walk to the elevators without looking back and frantic stab at the button of the nearest one. Relieved when it opens right away.I can’t make myself look their way, but turning to push the ground floor button, I accidentally catch sight
I must sit in numbed shock for minutes as tears pour down my face and then zone back into reality and the fact I am still sitting in this sterile room. My mind was lost to some weird state of nothing as I try to digest what I am reading and flick through the papers again as though I had hallucinated it. I can’t swallow it down as this dream state of weirdness pushes me to feel like I am floating in some dizzy haze.There it is in red ink, so bold you cannot miss it or the meaning. There is no mistake and no other way to interpret it. It even states on the cover sheet what your results mean, and right there, it says a zero percent score means no blood relation to your test subject.I let out a sob of sheer devastation. Not because I’m sad that he’s not but because of everything I have suffered in these last weeks. It’s relief and yet also resentment and heartbreak all rolled into one. Self-pity for what I have endured.Every stab at my heart, every crumbling of my soul and mental state
“Mom is running late today?” I point out while packing away Bryan’s dishes from lunch. Slightly irritated by it. Eyes on the clock as I don’t want a repeat of yesterday and running into that jerk and his shadow again. I have decided that for my own mental state Dane is right and we should not intend to ever cross paths. Seeing him causes more harm than good and it reminds me everytime that I am no further forward in getting over him.My day, after seeing him, always goes to shit, and my ongoing crappy insomnia is so much worse now we are under the same sky. I might never sleep again. I’m just so emotionally exhausted by all of this and wish I could fall asleep and wake up when I am over it.“She’s been tired, maybe just on slow-mo. She should take more time to relax.”“Well she better hurry up as they are taking you for your scans and assessment in about five minutes. She’s normally here by now.” Not to mention Dane is due in twenty and I wanted to be long gone.“You don’t need to sta
Hearing Bryan about to out me is all the push I need, not wanting it to seem like I am hiding, and I yank the curtain back to reveal myself. Plastering on a blank expression cool manner and lift my chin a little higher. Eyes straight to Bryan to ensure I don’t stray their way completely, blanking the two figures lingering closely near his bed.Seeing them in my peripheral is enough. The sickening lurch of pain reminds me that it never goes away, even when I stop noticing it as much.“All done and tidy. My mom won’t moan about me putting them in the wrong place.”I catch the slight movement of surprise out of the corner of my eye and the way Hannah slides back to hide behind Dane at seeing me appear. Dane’s head had jerked my way before he quickly averted it, and I caught the subtle gasp from one of them.“Um…Hi, Kayla. You look pretty.” Hannah whimpers like some terrified child who has just come face to face with the grumpy old witch of the village. Fake compliments to try and befrien