Becca.After tons of planning and purchasing tickets, I found myself standing in the bedroom packing my suitcases, going through everything that I was going to need while we were away in New Zealand. Initially, when I told Neal and Allegra about what I wanted to do, I was almost certain that they would disagree. Yet again, they surprised me, as they always did, and agreed that the trip would be a wonderful idea. Of course, considering the fact that the doctor had cleared me for travel, that is.Slowly going through all the clothing I had placed on top of the bed, I packed it into the suitcase with careful precision and then proceeded to grab all of my toiletries that were in their individual bags and place them in as well.It wasn't until I had placed some documents that I needed just in case something were to happen over there that the small letter that Mr. Shavers had given me that had been left by James fell out onto the floor.With how hectic everything had been o
Neal.The moment that the plane finally landed in New Zealand, I couldn't help but give a very large sigh of relief. Never in my life had it felt like I was on a plan for so long, and I had been to Australia before. Even though those flights were just as long, there was something about this flight that was just exhausting.Perhaps it was the fact that sweet Becca decided that we would ride first class like regular people all the way to New Zealand.I could have gotten us on a better plane—a more private plane even. But no, she wanted to have an adventure. Not that I was complaining, but my sister sure as hell was, and her complaining made Becca laugh."Did you see the way that guy looked at me? It was as if I was at a buffet, and he wanted something all you can eat." Allegra's disgusted tone caused both Becca and I to snort with laughter."Oh my God. It wasn't even like that, and you know it."Allegra turned to Becca with a glare on her face as she used the fan in her h
Becca.As soon as I stepped outside with the lovely Miss Rogers, the lady who owned the cabana that I had rented, I noticed how Neal seemed very frustrated with whatever kind of conversation that he was having. I wasn't sure what was going on. Perhaps it was work, perhaps it was something else. As soon as his eyes landed on me, he quickly finished his conversation. I found it curious how he was acting, but as he slowly made his way towards me, this frown that was upon his face once before disappeared and was replaced with a smile."So, how do you like everything?" he asked me as he approached."It's beautiful. Miss Rogers has been absolutely wonderful. She showed me everything that the house has to offer, and she's hoping that we have a wonderful two weeks' vacation," I replied as my eyes drifted from Neal to the woman again.Her soft, pale blue eyes crinkled at the corners as she turned her small smile into one that was larger, her hands clasped in front of her as she
James.The moment that I got off the phone with Neal, I knew he was going to be a complication. He didn't seem eager to help me, and I didn't blame him. After everything that I had put her through, why would he?What annoyed me the most, though, was he thought that he could actually dictate to me what I was going and not going to do. If I wanted to get to Becca, I could. I knew it was best for me to keep away, to be able to watch from a distance, and hope that she was okay, but the other part of me longed to be next to her again.I wanted to hold her in my arms, I wanted to get on my knees and beg her forgiveness, and I wanted to be part of my child's life. I had already lost one child because of my selfishness, and the last thing I needed to do was allow myself to lose another.Even my grandson wasn't going to be able to have me as part of his life because of the shit that I pulled. Perhaps it had happened back in the day, back when I was younger, when I made these terrible
Becca.I wasn't entirely sure what was going on. Or better yet, what Neal and Allegra were up to. Their whispered conversations behind closed doors over the past few days while we were on vacation were confusing. It wasn't like them to hide things from me.It wasn't like them to act this way in general."Sorry about that. I had to take a phone call." Allegra laughed as she walked over with her very alcoholic mixed drink and a strawberry virgin daiquiri for me."No problem, you and Neal seem to have a lot going on the last few days."She gave me a quizzical look with a small confused smile as she took her seat on the lounge chair next to me on the back deck. "What are you talking about? I haven't been any different than I always am.""Is that so? Then what's up with all the secretive conversations with your brother behind closed doors?" As if she had been found out. Her lips parted, and she looked around, slightly worried."I don't know what you're talking about.""F
Becca.As I stood before Neal, staring at him, trying to process the words that he had said, I felt my heart slowly beat faster. A man that I had shared a bed with many times and grown to care about was a cold-blooded killer.How was it that this kind, gentle person who had done everything in his power to take care of me could kill people without hesitation?I didn't know if I could believe that any of it could be true. I couldn't see Neal being that kind of person. Yet, as he spoke, I knew the words were truer than I wanted to admit. It was the first time in a long time that someone had been genuinely truthful with me, and that raw information gutted me to the core."Please tell me that you're lying, that all of that is just something you said to upset me. Tell me that's not true." As tears filled my eyes, I waited for him to say anything that would suggest the fact that he was simply making it up. But as I stared at him, I could tell he wasn't."Out of everything I just
Neal.When Becca left, my emotions rolled through me like a thunderstorm over a grassy field. I couldn't believe that I had acted the way that I did. She hadn't deserved it, and honestly, I felt nothing but remorse swelling through my body like an angry viper looking for a way out.After everything that she had been through lately, and all the countless times I had stood by her side, I had never given her a reason to doubt me, to doubt my allegiance to her, to doubt the safety that she felt with me, until she found out the truth.Even though she said she was okay, I saw it in her eyes, the resentment, the anger… and all of it because I couldn't be f*cking honest with her about who I was.Sitting on the edge of my bed, I held my head in my hands. I had been foolish to think that I was someone that could be desired. Never had I been a man to care what other people thought. But when it came to Becca, I cared deeply. And that was because I was in love with her.Without warning
Becca.I hadn't remembered falling asleep, but the light filtered through my open window, and as it did, my eyes fluttered open, giving way to another beautiful day. Stretching my arms over my head, my hand touched a warm body, and quickly looking to my left, I spotted Neals' sleeping form resting beside me.I hadn't even realized that he had come into my bed last night, but looking at him now, I saw him in a different light. He wasn't the man I once knew, but instead, he was much stronger than I realized. To be holding all of these secrets all these years and never having been able to talk to someone was something I would never be able to grasp. How lonely that must have been for him.Rolling to my side, I minded my baby bump and rested my head upon my hand as I reached over with my free hand brushing a strand of hair from his eyes. As quick as my touch had been, he grasped my wrist and slowly opened his eyes."Good morning, beautiful," he whispered in a rough voice a