I am staring at the ceiling thinking about my life. Definitely, I got bored from surfing in the internet and from watching tiktok videos. " Kulang na naman tong boundry mo! " Nagising ako sa pag mumuni muni dahil sa sigaw ni lola. Araw-araw na lang ganito, paulit- ulit parang sirang plaka. " Nag -boundry naman ako. Noong lunes lang naman ako hindi nakapag bigay dahil nga pina rehistro ko yung isang motor " Pag katapos ng sigaw narinig ko naman si Papa na sumagot. " Wala akong pakialam! Umalis ka dito iwan mo yung motor! " lola said with so much anger. I heard her cursed and throw some of the kitchen utensils. My heart is beating so fast as I experience this scenario once again. The feeling of loneliness and poverty. Sa bawat araw na dumadaan tila pinapa mukha sa akin, na MAHIRAP KA LANG. You don't deserve to live because of the lack of money. Worst is, if you cannot provide a money for a while people will ridicule you. Unfortunately, th
" Are you okay? " That was the first question he asked me.Okay nga ba ako? My eyes watered and it flows without any warning. Bakit nga ba sa tuwing tinatanong tayo kung okay lang ba tayo ay nakakaiyak. He's a stranger yet why he's so concern to my well-being compared to my family." Hey why are you crying? Are you hurt? " the man asked a little panicky. Tila isang malaking problema ang pag iyak ko. He started wiping my tears away from my eyes using a hanky. I want to laugh pa fa-fall rin si kuya e no? At first, I didn't seem comprehend his question but it resonated within my mind.Am I okay?Am I hurt? Definitely.Ang tanong na " okay ka lang ba? " ay nag papatunay na hindi ako okay. Kadalasan kaya natin tinatanong ang isang tao kung okay lang ba sila ay dahil may mali tayong nakikita. Maybe we observed that their bodies got thinner or their faces are void of delight. Its either you feel that they are stressed or you're aware about the
We both panted as we finished kissing. He leaned forward to my forehead as we breath hard. He stared at me like I'm the most beautiful woman on earth. I don't know but being with this man feels sureal.It's like a forbidden opportunity to even look at him." What's your name? " He asked still panting. His lips is swollen and reddish. I'd be a hypocrite if I say it's not tempting." Athena. You? " I asked while staring at the most gorgeous man I've ever seen. Humapa na pareho ang hingal naming dalawa.He stand straight and extend his hand to me. Pag papahiwatig ng kagustuhang mag pakilala. I noticed the veins protruding in his arm. Those tiny black hairs that rested on his arm. He looks formal and strict. Wealthy even but unlike those typical high profiled person, he seems kind I guess. He noticed that I am looking at his arm. So, I cleared my throat and looked away." Elijah Samaniego " he introduced confidently. Smirking I accept
Eh? San daw? Tama ba yung narinig ko? Kama? I'm too clouded with the thought of spending time with him to the point of foolishness. Ngayon ko lang naintidihan yung sinabi niya kanina. Is that how he perceived me? An easy to get woman just because I kissed him? Biglang kumulo ang ulo ko sa ideyang yun. " What the- " I can't even finish my sentence because he keeps dragging me. He really thinks I'm easy huh. " Wait! " I forcefully grab my hand from his hold. Grabe porket matangkad siya kaya kung mahatak wagas! Eh di ikaw na mahaba ang biyas! I screamed in my head. Akalain mong hihingalin ka lang dahil pa sa pag hatak niya. Imagine being dragged by a 6 footer. Sinong di hihingalin don? He gave me the why-did-you-stop look. Aba! Siya pa ngayon itong confused. Maybe he's just pretending or masking his true intention. The kiss earlier probably gave him the idea how willing I am to become his bed warmer. Well he's wrong but my inner self castigate me.
Bago pa ako makapasok ay nag salita na siya." So this is it? " He looked hurt. Does he really hurt? Maybe this is how I want to remember him. Pained because we will never see each other again. Unless, we'll set a time and place to meet each other. Which is impossible.Tanga ka ba Athena? I asked myself a stupid question." Anong so this is it? " I asked innocently trying to mask the pain.Pretending that I don't have any idea about what he's talking about." You're pushing me away. Like you're ending something between us. Kahit wala naman talaga " he chuckled sarcastically parang hindi rin makapaniwala. I don't know but the words he said stabbed my heart. Oh right, he's just a man who almost hit me by his car. Nothing more. I smiled bitterly at the thought." Yeah- you're right " he continue speaking while nodding as if he's convincing himself." You're just the girl I met earlier. Nothing more " sabi niya na nag pasikip ng dibdib ko. There
I woke up late because of Elijah's friend request. I mean what the heck right? I don't even remember telling him about my fb account. Who's he? A stalker or what? Maybe he's a hacker from FBI agency! Okay you're being stupid again Athena.I groaned please stop thinking about him Athena. Just think about your own problem. Baka mamaya mapalayas na kami kapag hindi pa ako tumayo. So I got up from my bed and stretch my hands upward. I inhaled and exhaled after repeating that ten times I look at the door. Behind that door lies my demon named lola. You can't blame me from calling her that alright? I love her of course but not enough to suck her attitude. Siguro kung anghel ako kaya kong maging mabait kaso tao ako.Okay here we go. As soon as I opened my door." Mabuti naman nagising ka na! " Lola said angrily.Well good morning to you too lola I greeted her in my mind. At least she said good morning right? That's better I guess compare to just ignoring me
We both don't know what to say after that passionate kiss. Maybe for anyone who will witness such scandalous scene may think that we are just driven by lust. We're just too horny that's why we can't stop our raging hormones. Well even I will conclude the same way. After all we're just human beings who happen to be judgementals. But it speaks something different for me. His kisses makes me feel wanted and loved. For someone so broken and lost I feel the Almighty granted me what I wanted all these years.A safe haven.A comforter.A salvation.The beginning of serendipity in my life seeps in through my parched soul. It's overwhelming yet as the hope arises fear also creeps in.Dahil lahat ng nag uumpisa ng mabilis at madali ay madali ring baliin at alisin. It's funny to think that even those people who waited for such a long time for someone they love. Ended up with the same situation like those who just waited for months. T
Hindi pa rin ako makapaniwala. Kaya pala nag tataka ako kung bakit alam niya yung school na pinapasukan ko. I never even mentioned to him anything about my University. While we're on the road going to the school I cannot remember if I gave him any direction. Maybe because my mind was still clouded by his wet kisses.Ang landi landi kase! I rolled my eyes inwardly. Duh! Sinong hindi magiging wanton mami sa gwapong nilalang na to?" Do you have any problem Ms. Delos Reyes?" his voice took me back to my reverie. Ngayon ko lang napansin na lahat pala sila ay naka abang sa sasabihin ko. Now I have a full view of his body. Ngayon ko lang napansin na nag palit siya ng damit. Kaninang umaga naka black t shirt lang siya. Now he's wearing a navy blue dress shirt and a pair of black slacks with a designer belt. I clicked my tongue inwardly mayabang din to eh. Like duh? This is a public school gusto niya bang manakawan? Showing off such expensive things will only attract thi
" What is beauty? " weekends has ended and weekdays has finally arrived. Today is Monday which is the start of every hell week for students. My professor is discussing the term "beauty" and how beauty is defined distinctively from every countries around the world. But he's still asking our own point of view regarding about the said term of course with examples based on facts. Hindi niya pa masyadong ipinapaliwanag ang term nanghihingi agad siya ng examples. I rolled my eyes inwardly.Tumingin ako sa harapan at nakita ko ang prof ko na may hawak na libro habang naka sandal sa teacher's desk. He's in mid 40's I guess. Wearing a gray slacks and a white polo shirt he doesn't look appealing compared to Elijah. Hindi naman siya mukhang masungit at mahigpit pero I'm not quite sure.I observe everyone on the class. Some of them are barely listening. Sa totoo nga lang ay may natutulog pa hindi nga lang nakikita. The disappointment in me is visible through the
" Ate don tayo. "" Ate dito pala. "" Gusto ko rin don Kuya. " Abby is so excited that she can't pick properly among the available rides in the Amusement park.Narito na hinatak kami sa Bumbling Boulders tapos maya-maya hinatak niya si Elijah sa Carousel tapos noong nakita niya ang Ferris Wheel hinatak niya kaming parehas. All we can do is to laugh because of her cuteness. Pinisil ni Elijah ang kaniyang pisngi para huminahon ang kapatid ko saglit." Calm down Abby. Don't worry we will ride all the rides that you want, kay'? " Abby nodded willingly. Alam niya na kailangan niyang kumalma para makipili siya ng maayos. She inhaled and exhaled and when she already calmed down, Elijah turn her around facing all the fun rides.He crouch and ask her " So, ano ng rides and gusto mong unang sakyan? " umikot ang mata ng aking kapatid sa lahat ng rides. Her pupils are like a small black ball tossing back and forth inside he
Bumyahe kami papuntang Laguna ng ilang oras dahil gusto nga ni Abby sa Enchanted Kingdom. I can't help but fill my eyes with the wonders of the earth and with the tall buildings built by talented architects and engineers.Ngayon lang rin kami makakalayo sa bahay namin. Ang makapunta at makasakay sa kotse ay isa ng malaking pag papala para sa amin kaya sinusulit ko talaga. This is what I'm praying for and God answered my cries." Are you hungry? " napatingin ako kay Elijah dahil doon. Sumulyap siya sa akin saglit ngunit binalik rin sa daan ang tingin." Hindi pa naman. Ikaw ba nagugutom ka?, " tanong ko. " o nauuhaw? Do you want water? " tumango lang siya at kinuha ko ang bottled of water na nakalagay sa dash board.Ibinigay ko sa kanya but his veering the car so he can't drink by himself. So, I open the lid of the bottle of water then I move towards his place in order for him to drink on the water bottle. Medyo nahihiya ako kasi baka mak
Today is the day where Elijah and I will spend our day with Abby. Tuwang-tuwa si Abby noong sinabi sa kaniya ni Elijah na igagala siya nito." Talaga po? " the thrill and excitement in her voice is palpable. Hindi siya mapakali at kagaya ng ibang bata naging maligalig. My heart clench at the thought that her childhood is not as happy as like the other children in her age. Minsan nakikita ko siyang tumitingin sa laruan ng ibang bata dahil wala siyang kahit isang kagaya noon. Insecurity is in her eyes and as much as I want to buy something like that for her, money is an issue. Wala kaming perang pambili noon kaya ang ginagawa ko ako ang nakikipag laro sa kaniya. One tear had escaped from my right eye. Agad ko rin yung pinunasan para hindi makita ng kapatid ko." Of course! San mo ba gustong pumunta? " Elijah is good at this. Hindi ko alam kung dahil ba teacher siya o ano. I can't believe that he and Abby would get along right away in their first
Nanghihina kong pumasok sa kuwarto ko at umupo. I am emotionally and physically drained. Ang bigat bigat ng dibdib ko na para bang may libo libong hollow blocks ang nakadagan dito. But I also feel empty. What an irony. Hindi ko na namalayang andito pala si Elijah. Bigla tuloy akong nahiya dahil narinig niya ang lahat ng pag tatalo namin kanina.I close the door and just like that darkness consumed each of one of us inside the room. But I don't feel fear, it's comforting even. Ang madidilim niyang bilog na mata ay nakatuon sakin ng pumasok ako. But unlike what I expected, I don't see pity there. Hindi ko siya mabasa, wala akong mabasang emosyon sa mukha niya.He stared at me momentarily, but went to my side a few seconds to give me the most soothing and tears triggering embrace. Earlier, I thought my drama is over but his touch enabled me to cry once again. Sabi nila kapag niyayakap ka daw tatahan ka na pero siguro kung yung yayakap sayo ay yung taong gusto
I'm not yet done... The need to release my anger is so adamant and no one can ever stop me. My father is just staring at me his face is void of any emotion. Habang ang kaniyang girlfriend ay nanlalaking matang nakatingin sa akin." I'm done putting up with your bullsh*ts! " I don't care anymore if he's my father because the one moment he stepped out of this door years ago his position in my life became unclear.I know parents are humans too. They can be sad, broken and can be vulnerable too at times. Wala akong sinasabi na hindi siya pwedeng umiyak. Na hindi siya pwedeng malungkot just because he's our father because before he is a father to us, he is a husband to my mother. I can't clearly see them anymore because my tears are blinding me. The air smells anger, betrayal and... falling apart.We're a family . He should cried with us, grieved and mourned with us. So that in the process we can be able to give strength and encouragement to each ot
I swallowed the lump on my throat and carry my feet to the living room where my father is. Back when I was a child I remembered the astonishment I have for him. My father in my eyes is the kindest, bravest and the best father in the world. Maybe because we didn't see and be with him as we grow up. The need to work outside the country to provide for our needs is what they prioritized. Bata pa lang ako iinuukit ko na sa isip ko kung anong itsura ni Papa. Kagaya ba ng mga tatay ng kaklase ko? Malaki rin kali ang katawan niya? What about his voice? Does it lies in a bass timbre of voice? As it should be because he's a man? or Is he soft spoken?I was in a kindergarten that time when my mother broke the news. For the first time in my life, my father will not be faceless in my mind anymore. The silouhette inside the young Athena's mind soon will have an eyes, ears, mouth, and a lips. But what she wants to see, more so to feel is a fatherly love. Ano bang pakiramda
Days passed by like a wind so fast and everything went smoothly with my relationship with Elijah. Every single day he's making me special not just by giving me bouquet of flowers. It's counted but the way he takes care of me is what makes my heart flutters. Mapapatingin ka na lang talaga sa kaniya at mag papasalamat sa Diyos na binigyan ka ng ganitong lalaki. We're still not official and I'm thinking ways to utter my sweetest "yes" in a most memorable way. Yung hindi niya makakalimutan kasi wala pang nakakagawa. The Saturday morning doesn't makes me feel sluggish, it boosted my energy even.After I got up from the bed, a wide grin is already plastered on my face. Hearing the birds tweeting, I averted my gaze outside our house and as I see the trees dancing along with the rhythm of the wind, the urge to also sway my body is strong.Kaya kinuha ko ang cellphone ko sa loob ng kuwarto at namili ng kantang mapapasayaw ka talaga. Cleaning without music is s
I came for the first time in my life. Kagaya nga ng sinabi ko hindi ako inosente at marami akong alam. Reading books is one of my past time and there are book themes for that kind of escapade. Erotica as we all know. However, I never touch myself even though my body is responding in the same way the characters in the book is feeling. Hindi ko alam na masarap pala ito sa pakiramdam. Maybe because I'm doing it with the person I like...love.We're both panting really hard after he licked and finger fucked me. He lifted me up but my uniform is dirty.He smirked evilly." You look hot. " umirap ako sa sinabi niya at napatingin sa gitna ng pantalon niya. He followed where my eyes are." How about that? " bigla akong namula ng maalala lahat ng ginawa namin kanina. I never thought I can do that. Bend so willingly on the grass and let him do me!" Nah, I can't took your virginity here in this dirty place. It's your first time so it should be in