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Chapter 24
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2020-07-06 21:27:48Jules knew Omar was at the other side of the door waiting. He had pushed the doorbell several times but Jules was having a hard time opening the door.
Omar, Shancai and him had agreed together that they would meet up at his house for the presentation. At that moment he didn't have any problems making the promise but now, now? Fuck, he was nervous. His heart was pounding so fast and loud he was sure Omar could hear it even from the six-inch wood that separated them.
Venus had told him earlier. When she had started hearing the thoughts of Omar, approaching. Although still meters away, that he should just be himself.
"Gee, thanks mom. I feel so much better now." He'd replied drily.
Venus had laughed, running her fingers through his hair. His eyes fluttered at her touch. "Okay, so tell me what's really going on," at his look, she continued. "What? I may not be able to read your min
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Jules didn't knock at Venus's door he just waltzed right in. Carrie greeted him at the kitchen, looking unimaginably tall and happy. She gave him her customary peck on the cheek that reminded him of his mom. "Oh Jules, your smile is as gorgeous as ever."That made him smile wider and she moved forward to hold him, hug him. It was funny because he just saw her yesterday. It was funny because she did the same thing then too, and every other time. She was hyper-aware of his motherless state so much so that it was almost overbearing. Almost.This was something Carrie and Venus shared, their incapability of watching someone suffer.She pulled away, looking at the laptop in his hands and raised an eyebrow. "Movie night?""Nope, anime night."She laughed then frowned. "Right. I hope V is actually helping you get some work done. It isn't all play no work?""She doesn't even give me the time of day if I get below a B." He st
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Jules smiled at Venus.It seemed that was all he was doing these days smiling, laughing, loving, living and staring. He couldn't forget staring, he had never been a people watcher until he met Venus. And then all he wanted to do was watch her. Watch her eat, watch her sleep, watch her dance, watch her sing, watch her smile, watch her laugh, watch her live, watch her love and watch her love him.Dear God.They were on her roof again. The moon was out but there were prettier things to watch - like the planet, Venus. Hostile and fucking hot."Anytime I finished watching a film or cartoon as a kid, I always wanted to emulate something. Like when I watched Spy Academy I spent the next few days going on spy missions. It drove my dad mad."Venus was talking but she was also so damn close and her smell always did strange things to him. And her eyes, and her smile
Last Updated : 2020-07-06Quicksand Chapter 27
Jules had never felt so minuscule and dark, standing next to his dad.Jonathan (Jace) Carson was very white, very tall and very put-together— at least, that's what he used to be like. The man next to him looked nothing like that; the suit he wore while expensive was worn, wrinkled and fraying. It looked a little grey, just like him actually.When he first noticed him, he kinda tittered. Then tried counting on his hand how long it had been - too long, his brain supplied. Too damn, long.Did he walk, run, or fly? He couldn't remember, but he was moving. Finally when he was a few meters away Venus appeared in front of him, trying to stop him.But Jules almost plowed over her. Then her hand grasped his neck pulling his face towards her. The other hand clasped his fist effectively stopping him.Jesus, he thought desperately. When had his hand curled into a
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Jules felt like he was holding his breath.He wasn't obviously.He was still breathing, moving, and kicking but on the inside, it felt like one big inhale without an exhale. A comma; a pause.He was waiting, for what exactly he didn't know yet. His life looked like it was coming together. If it were a picture then destiny or God had taped it together with clear duct tape. It looked miserable and untidy but it was together and that was the most important part.At least, that's what he thought. That's what he fucking thought."Would you stop spacing out and give me a hand," Venus called from the other side of the car.They were at the process of offloading grocery bags when Jules got a text from his father.I know you usually eat at your girlfriend's but can you come home for dinner, tonight? I made Mac and cheese, your f
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Venus left the party an hour early with Bella and David. They had a thing. So Omar dropped Jules off at his doorstep.He stumbled into his house slightly buzzed and disoriented. He knew his dad was home (his car was parked outside) so he wondered why all the lights were switched off.Jules took his time walking afraid of falling over. He poured a glass of water for himself in the kitchen and touched the cool glass to his forehead. He was feeling clammy for some reason.His stomach was wrangled with knots and his shoulders were tense. Everything was fine - and yet he felt uneasy. He wanted to blame it on the alcohol but he barely had two drinks. He looked around distractedly. Where was his dad?Jules shook his head and, hopefully, also his uneasiness. He drained the glass and climbed the stairs. He was at
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Jules parked outside the abandoned field. The spot behind the dumpster was taken by David's blue Sedan.The sight of it eased some tension of his shoulders. Bella had sent another text telling him where they were. He tried calling but she hadn't answered, much to the dismay of his heart.His food was still doing somersaults in his stomach when he opened the door and stepped out. He had to wiggle his legs for a second to stop the trembling and shake of the numbness.Jules walked the short distance to David's car, there he could make out three figures standing at the side. Bella, David, and Venus.The relief was instantaneous and staggering. He leaned into the car. Because honestly, it really did feel like the weight of the world had been lifted off his shoulders. And the loss of the weight made him dizzy. Venus was okay.He squinted, at least physically.Ju
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beware: a lot of angst & emotional trauma ahead. also a little note, bear in my mind that while i did some research (thanks google) there are still a lot of stuff i don't know about medical research. so some of it is real while the others are on the fly. remember venus can read minds, so i think it's okay if things are a bit weird or unrealistic, yeah? that being said, i'm sorry if i made any crazy mind-boggling mistakes and offended anyone. i'm human okay, forgive me? thanks.━Venus was trembling in his arms.It was just a few minutes but it felt like an infinity before she stopped crying. Before he stopped crying—before they stopped crying.Then Jules asked the question, even though he could still see the tears tracks on her face. Even though he could still taste his on his tongue. Even tho
Last Updated : 2020-07-06Quicksand Chapter 32
Venus wouldn't look at him, she just shrugged. "Take it however you deem fit.""Because you're...sick?" It was hard getting the word out. It felt like there was a huge ball wedged in his throat. He wanted to vomit but there was nothing in his stomach but heartbreak and pain."No," Venus said, after a few seconds. "Because I don't love you and I'm tired of pretending."The world fell silent for a second or maybe he just couldn't hear anymore, but then he could. He could hear her words clear as day in his head on repeat.I don't love you. I don't love you. I don't love you. "Oh." He might have said or breathed or cried or screamed.Oh.Jules lost his everything— but mostly his balance. Venus moved towards him quickly, touching him finally. She held onto his arm steadying him. It was instinct t
Last Updated : 2020-07-06
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Quicksand Epilogue
Jules tied the laceson his shoes for the thirteenth time since they arrived. He can feel Lars's annoyance next to him like a suffocating fog."Do that again, and I'll knife you," he murmured.Jules visibly tensed before sitting up and pretending to straighten his tie. "I hate it when you go all gangster on me. You're my manager, not my dealer.""Old habits die hard," Lars replied with a wistful sigh.Jules glared at him completely forgetting the tightness in his chest for a second. "That's not funny.""Then stop acting so nervous. You have had book signings, interviews,fundraiserand much more. This isn't even your first book reading. You're used to this, so what's with all the nerves?"Confusion and heartache swirled suddenly inside his stomach. Twisting and dipping as he tried to find the words. "This is the first time I've been b
Quicksand Chapter 51
Jules didn't realizehis couch was alive. Until now, that is.Before now, he wouldn't have had any reason to notice. After all, he barely spent up till an hour sitting on it. Since he didn't watch tv. No, he watched anime. In his room, on his laptop in HD.But Jules was laying on his couch now, he didn't know long it had been, a millennial was it felt like. But in reality it was probably a few hours, he wasn't sure though since time seemed to have lost its meaning. And the longer he stayed like this. The more certain he was over the discovery that; yes, his couch was actually alive.When it was touched, it moaned.When it was poked, it moaned.When it was disturbed, it moaned.It didn't breathe though, it couldn't. But that's okay, Jules couldn't breathe either. It didn't make him any less alive.Jules couldn't breathe,
Quicksand Chapter 50
The whole family was in a cycle of perpetual happiness. That lasted for seven days, the time it took to prepare for the surgery.Jules had told Carrie first, and she cried and cried and cried. She held onto him so tight, kissing both his cheeks were also wet. Then he told Venus step-brothers and Merlin cried.And Jules was happy. Happy she wanted to live, try, stay and not just for him, but for her. It was something she had taught him. Months ago when the demons of his past hung around him like a dark shadow, a thick suffocating fog. When he felt responsible for two deaths and refused to die himself because he wanted to suffer.But things had changed and not just for him, for both of them. Jules and Venus had collided but they didn't destroy, they created.Even now, that's what they did."Are you okay?" Venus asked, but she wasn't really asking. She was just reading the words out of the pr
Quicksand Chapter 49
After a moment, Julescut through the heavy silence that crashed landed in the room. "What on earth, is he saying?"When Venus didn't say anything. He realized all of a sudden that she had stopped crying. And somehow her silence was worse than the sound of her sobbing."He's joking, right?" His throat felt horribly tight.Tell me he's joking."I'm tired," she whispered. Like it was the answer to all his questions. And in a way it was. In a way, everything was turning crystal clear.She was quiet but he was loud. His breathing was loud, his heartbeat was loud, even his voice was loud. "You can't be serious?"But she was and he couldn't breathe. "I'm tired." She repeated again like he didn't hear her the first time. "I'm tired, Jules.""You're giving up? You want to die?!" He must be shouting, his ears were ringing and his throat was hurti
Quicksand Chapter 48
Jules was screaming.This time he knew it was him. This time he knew that that horrible keening sound belonged to him. But even though he knew it, it didn't change that fact that he couldn't stop.It took him longer than it should to calm down. It took him longer than it should to stop breaking. It took him longer than it should to call 911. It took longer than it should for them to understand what he was saying. Because he was sure for a solid minute all he was saying wasmy planet is dying.God,bless the operator because she waited all past his ramblings. She must have realized that he sounded to broken for this to be a prank. So she waited calmly until he finally gave her actually facts other than;my planet is dying.Then Jules called Carrie as he held Venus. His hand on her chest taking tiny solace from the steady thumps of her heart. She was
Quicksand Chapter 47
"Drop it over there, please," Marie said, pointing to the spot beside the dresser.Jules dropped the box. He wiped off the sweat accumulating at the top of his forehead and stretched. "That's the last of it." He said to her."Thanks, sweetie." She said. "You've been a huge help." The moving truck had just left. He had spent the whole afternoon helping Marie move her stuff into their house."It's okay," he replied, then pulled out a folded photograph and handed it to her. "When I was taking some boxes to Kenya's room. I tipped over the trash can by accident and found this inside."Marie's smile disappeared as she gazed at the photo of Kenya and her father. "Oh dear," she whispered tracing her daughter's smile in the picture with her finger. "She's still so angry at him."Jules folded his arms. "It's not like she doesn't have a reason to be." His voice was angry. "He
Quicksand Chapter 46
Venus was the firstthing Jules saw when he entered his Biology class.His mouth dropped open and she sat up a little straighter.He sat down and she said. "Surprise."Venus had started coming to school less and less until she stopped coming altogether. School became more boring than usual, a chore he had to get over with so he could rush home and see her. So seeing her here was a treat. Even with her skin so pale it was translucent, her tired eyes and her tired smile.He smiled at her and said, "I love you," as naturally as he would say 'hello'Her answering smile made his heart jump. He wanted to take a picture, but he restrained himself and took her hand instead.Mr. Alston was pleasantly surprised when he walked into class. He stood by the door for second taking her in, worry swirling in his eyes. But when Venus glanced at him, he looked away quic
Quicksand Chapter 45
Marie pulled his head gently to her chest. Jules felt his self-restraint disappear as drops of moisture left his eyes. "Everyone," he whispered, "everyone has told me time and time again that it isn't my fault. And sometimes I believe them. But then sometimes I have these dreams-nightmares where she gets into the car and dies. Then my dad is shouting over and over that it is my fault. And there is blood on my hands, her blood because," his voice cracked, "I killed her.""No, Jules," she gasped, pulling him closer, tighter. "You can't actually believe that. You didn't kill your mother, she got in that car on her own free will. I bet if she were here even knowing the truth she'd still do it again. And as for your father, he loves you so much, you know that right?"Jules didn't say anything but his silence spoke volumes."Jules," disbelief colored her voice. "You can't still believe Jace doesn't love you. I
Quicksand Chapter 44
Jules tugged at his hair in frustration. "Damn, this is so hard."Venus touched the hand, clutching his hair. "It doesn't have to be."He shook his head vigorously and water droplets found its way to her. "I don't think I can do this.""Jesus, Jules, can you like not do that?" her face screwed up in what was supposed to be a disgusted look. But Jules found the crease of her nose too cute to take her seriously. "And please enough with the drama. We came here to swim, not to see you agonize yet again on how you're going to end your manga."Jules pouted, "You're so mean today."Venus rolled her eyes, but a small smile was already blossoming and he felt his chest swell at the sight. "I'm always mean.""True that," Merlin chirped from behind him. Jules turned to take in the sight, yet again of both their families having a fun day at the pool.
