The Cold Wait

Nora’s POV 

I drove straight to Liam’s apartment, my fingers trembling as I repeatedly dialed his line, hoping he would pick but he didn’t. Fear of what he might do to himself, how disdainful he would be feeling due to the truth he had learnt gripped me.  

“What if this changes everything between us? What if he decides not to see me again? What if this breaks him completely?” those what-ifs enveloped my mind as I drove, with fear of uncertainty gripping my heart and glistening in my eyes.  

Eventually I got to his apartment, but he was nowhere to be found. I knocked desperately on his door repeatedly, hoping he would come out to me, but he didn’t. I peeped into his living room through the front window, hoping I would catch a glimpse of him but everywhere was claimed by darkness.  

It was then it hit me – that he wasn’t at home. I would have gone in, but I wasn’t with my spare key. 

“Where could he have gone? Why is he not home? Is he in danger? Did he...... hurt himself?” I thought, terrified.  

I pulled out my phone again, calling him for what felt like the hundredth time. But that time, I got a different result. Instead of him not picking, the call went straight to voicemail. I dialed the line again, still the same thing.  

A cold shiver ran down my spine and different terrifying thoughts made their way to my mind. I was scared – frightened that I would lose him and never see him again.  

“Please, Liam. Just let me know you’re okay. It’s fine if you do not want to talk to me now but at least, let me be rest assured that you are fine. I can explain everything to you whenever you are ready. Please, just reply to my messages or better still, pick up my call. You don’t have to speak, just pick it and I will be okay with that” I sent out a message to him with my shaky hands, with a cold lump forming in my throat.  

I didn’t realize I was all teary until a tear splashed on my phone screen. Guilt was eating me up – I had kept the truth away from him thinking I was protecting him, but I wasn’t. I was only protecting myself. I was being selfish, not putting into consideration how badly the truth would hurt him.  

I slid onto the stairway that led to his front door, my face buried in my folded legs. I sobbed, sobbed and sobbed with no one to console me. Memories of his smiles, the happy moments we shared together – which I feared would be the last, rushed to me.  

He had always been a source of happiness for me. The way he looked at me, smiled at me, cared about me and touched me said it all – that he was madly in love with me. He always tried his best to put a smile on my face while I, on the other hand, only betrayed his trust in me.  

Now that he was gone, was I satisfied? Would I be happy?  

I waited for what felt like eternity to get a response from him, but I got none.  

I called him again, but the outcome was still the same. I thought of calling someone who might know where he was, but I barely knew anyone close to him. He literally had no one but me—no friends, no one he could call family. 

I was the only one he relied on. 

And I betrayed him. 

Night was drawing in, but I still sat there, hoping he would get in touch. Then, my phone buzzed. My heart beeped, thinking it was him, but it wasn’t.  

It was a message from my father.  

“Where are you?” his message read. It was a simple question, yet it carried so much weight. It was almost midnight, and I was supposed to be at home. But the situation I was in didn’t allow me to think much of my father.  

I stared blankly at the message on my phone screen – I didn’t have the strength to respond. Not to him.  

He could die while burning with fury for all I care, he could make me bid the world farewell as soon as I got home for all I care – the only person that mattered to me at that moment was Liam.  

My father’s anger was the least of my problems. All I wanted was Liam. I wanted to see him, hug him and plead for his forgiveness.  

On that cold night, I found myself waiting outside for Liam till midnight came and passed. The rustling of the leaves and the constant barking of his neighbors' dog made me look up – hoping it was him. But it never was.  

Dawn came and I found myself staying awake all night, my weary eyes staring at the empty street, hoping for him to appear.  

I was cold, exhausted and numb, shivering as my teeth collided uncontrollably.   

Unwillingly, I gave in to defeat. I staggered to my feet, ready to make my way home. I took one last look at Liam’s apartment, before turning around to leave. As soon as I turned around, I froze.  

It was him.  

He was standing a few feet away from me, looking as surprised as I was. His puffy eyes widened in shock as if he couldn’t believe I was standing in front of him.  

His face was pale and his hair disheveled as if he didn’t get a wink of sleep also. He looked distraught and exhausted.   

We stared at each other – silence enveloping the space between us.  

“Liam” I whispered in a low voice, as tears streamed down my eyes.  

“You’ve been here all night?” his distant, yet concerned voice asked.  

I nodded, too weak to speak. My vision was beginning to blur and the world around me seemed to spin. The cold was slowly taking its toll on me – I hadn’t eaten, hadn’t slept and was in the cold for hours, waiting for my lover. 

Through my blurred vision, I saw him move closer, but he stopped midway.  

I tried taking a step towards him, but my weak legs betrayed me.  

“Why? What are you doing here?’ I barely heard him ask, but before I could respond, my body finally gave up.  

All I saw before darkness consumed me, was Liam rushing towards me, panic glued to his face.