Chapter 3

When I arrived home, I felt surrounded by loneliness and anguish. What had happened had caused even greater confusion. Nevertheless, in a certain way, I felt joy, as the conversation with Thiago had eased me. His kiss confirmed that I was truly deeply in love with him. But his words were like a sting, because the truth is that way, painful and cruel.

I lay down on the bed, and the only thing that went through my mind was the memory of his kiss. Something I would never forget, something that would remain etched in my life as the only symbol or prize. I was aware that belonging to Thiago's life was merely an illusion. Even though he had confessed that he was attracted to me, my mind kept shouting that it was all part of his game. And even if I wanted to fall for it, I couldn't anymore because pregnancy prevented me. Everything had been so magical that I didn't even think about reporting the Clinic. I instead embraced a state of resignation and surrendered to it, as there was no escape.

The ringtone of my cellphone snapped me back to reality. I wanted to believe it was Thiago, but in reality, it was just Laura, concerned about me.

— I kissed Thiago — I blurted out.

— Damn it! Don't start with jokes — she teased.

— He's attracted to me, he said so, but it doesn't matter anymore. I also told him that I'm pregnant.

— Fool! — Laura shouted — You shouldn't have done that. Your pregnancy isn't even noticeable, and you don't know if you might lose it or decide not to keep it after all.

— Don't mess with me, Laura! I'd rather die longing for Thiago than get rid of this child. Maybe it's the only thing that can save me from my terrible loneliness — I explained, as if I hadn't cursed the existence of the pregnancy just a moment ago.

— Well, it's a shame that it's happening right now and that you have to give up what you've dreamed of because of it — my friend said and hung up. I suppose she did it because my fatalism was becoming exhausting.

After the call, I only had the courage to curl up in bed, savoring the taste of Thiago's lips still on mine. A sensation brought about by the intense attraction I felt for him.

---

The next morning, I woke up hating the damn alarm. The pregnancy was starting to affect my physical state. I had a heaviness in my head and an insistent sleep that dominated me. I half-opened my eyes and saw a message on my cellphone. When I read Thiago's name in the notifications bar, sleep fled instantly.

— Come to the agency — the message ordered.

— Will you give me another kiss? — I asked curiously.

— Whatever you want, but come now — he replied.

In the bathroom, I washed my face to wake up completely.

— He's got me wrapped around his finger! Damn it! — I groaned, hating myself.

I dressed in the best clothes I had, although I knew they were insignificant to the millionaire. My simple makeup wouldn't impress him either. My face looked pale, and my eyes tired. The concealer didn't help much. For a moment, I felt defeated, but his last message kept me strong. I took my gray bag, arranged my cameras, and set out to find my motorbike.

— You can't ride the bike, Lisa, you're pregnant — I said to myself in complete frustration. Until a taxi passed by and took me to the agency.

— Good morning, Attorney Thiago — I greeted with a flirty smile as I entered the office. I felt his eyes on my unattractive silhouette. He looked me up and down, noticing my very dirty white Converse shoes and my worn-out leather jacket.

— Good afternoon, Lisa, it's already noon — he clarified, and then I realized I had slept the whole morning. — Your attire is not suitable for our prestigious agency, and your hair is disheveled — he said, wrapping his arm around my waist. I saw him furrowing his brow and touching my hair, dry from the low-quality shampoo I used. I hated that he was speaking to me formally when the night before we had kissed. His breath close to my shoulder sent shivers down my spine.

— I'm leaving then — I said, approaching my bag that I had placed on his desk. Despite everything, I still had my dignity, and I felt humiliated.

— You're not going anywhere — he replied, holding my hand so I wouldn't lift the bag. At that moment, I raised my face to his, taller than me. We established eye contact. I looked at his beard and his perfect nose. I couldn't tell if he was looking at me with disdain, desire, or pity. My thoughts were even more blocked when he let go of my hand and placed his hands on my back, pulling me towards him possessively.

— He's got me trapped — my mind screamed. I felt my body heat up, and his lips capturing mine caused an unexpected excitement. I placed my hands on his neck desperately. He touched my right thigh and then took off my jacket. My blood was boiling, and he couldn't stop kissing me passionately. I accidentally gasped in his mouth.

— Do you want this? — he asked, pulling away from me for a moment.

— Here? — I asked.

— Wherever you want — he said in a low voice.

— In the bathroom — I requested, afraid someone might see us — Just be careful, remember I'm pregnant.

— And I'm married — he replied, turning away from me. He gave me his back. — Go, Lisa, go into any dressing room, find better clothes there, and ask Mary to do your makeup. The model is Sandra Falcon. Do your best, these photos are for Vogue magazine. I sighed with embarrassment. I wanted to tell him he was an idiot, but I didn't have the courage. I decided to leave in a hurry. I pushed the door open and couldn't see if he turned around. I went to do what he had indicated and put on the most comfortable things I found. When I saw myself naked in front of the huge mirror in the dressing room, I could only focus on my belly. And even though my anger forced me to curse that event, my conscience as a good woman calmed me and filled me with concern for the well-being of that unknown creature within me. I had heard comments explaining that pregnant women shouldn't wear tight clothing, so I had chosen loose-fitting pants. I went to the studio and approached the model.

— Are you going to take my pictures? — she asked arrogantly before I finished greeting her.

— Yes, she'll take your pictures. I hired her exclusively for you. Any problem? — I heard Thiago's voice behind me. That was like my shield of defense, and I forgot the embarrassing moment, even though I was still embarrassed.

— I can leave if it bothers you that she takes your pictures, boss.

— If you're bothered by her taking your pictures, then there's no shoot — he interrupted me to address Sandra, who calmed down her arrogance at his insistence.

I saw her perfect silhouette and her well-maintained face, and I couldn't help but compare myself. I imagined the many times Thiago kissed the models because I couldn't believe that with a beautiful wife within his reach and surrounded by so many gorgeous models, he would choose to kiss me.

— Quick, Lisa — he ordered me with a seductive boss's voice when he realized I was lost in thought.

Sandra posed perfectly, and I tried to take the best photos. She left without saying goodbye, without even asking me to show her the photos. I was alone in the studio; it was already five in the afternoon, and all the workers were starting to leave. I put my cameras in my bag, went to the dressing room to get my clothes, but they were gone. I panicked.

— Take what you're wearing — Thiago said from the door. — Here's the payment for today, 600 dollars.

— I can't take something that doesn't belong to me — I said with dignity. — Also, why are you paying me when the accountant usually does it?

— Because this is a gift. She'll pay you another part next week. Take it, you need it, don't be foolish — he said, holding my hands and putting the money in them — also, please, take the clothes and whatever you think you can use.

— No, Thiago, why are you doing this? — I grumbled, concerned.

— I can't explain it, Lisa, at least not now. Go home safely, it's already very late, I'll spend the night here, I don't feel like going home.

— I can accompany you, I also don't want to go home.

— No, Lisa, we can't be near each other. Just go — he said in his sweet voice.

I couldn't reply anymore; he said goodbye with a timid kiss on my cheek. I put the money in my bag and left feeling bewildered.