Chapter 10 - Rawls

I could not get Claire off of my mind all night. I had a tough time going to sleep considering how hard I was when I went to bed. I could have easily just jerked off, but I was saving any sexual pleasure for the first time Claire, and I make love. No matter who she has been with before me, I will make her forget all of them. She will be screaming my name until she can barely speak.

The sound of a car door slamming jolted me out of my thoughts. I froze, listening as the footsteps grew closer. It was Evie, stumbling into the house after another night out. I heard the murmur of her voice, slurred and sloppy, as she made her way to the kitchen.

My stomach knotted with anxiety. Last night's kiss with Claire was still fresh on my lips, and the last thing I needed was to deal with my daughter's hangover. I knew she'd would expect breakfast, a warm cup of coffee, and likely a lecture about the dangers of partying too hard. I did not have the energy to deal with her. She was an adult, and she was acting worse than she did as a teenager.

But as a father, I couldn't ignore her. I stepped into the kitchen, bracing myself for the inevitable confrontation. Evie was leaning against the counter, her hair a tangled mess, and her eyes bloodshot. She looked up at me, a forced smile on her lips. "Morning, Dad," she slurred, her voice thick with either alcohol or drugs.

"Evelyn." I always used her full name when I was angry with her. "Please tell me that you did not drive home last night."

"Dad, you worry too much. I grabbed an Uber home. The only problem is that I don't remember where I left my car." She started laughing like that was funny, which it is not, it's irresponsible and the car had most likely been towed.

"Evelyn, you need to get it together," I said firmly, trying to keep my frustration in check. "You can't keep living like this."

"Dad. just get off my back. I have it together, you just don't understand anything." With that she ran up the stairs and slammed her door. I am at a loss of what to do with her. I may need to talk to Mary for some parenting advice. I could ask Claire to talk to her, but I don't know if that is a good idea.

The tension in the house was palpable as I sat down at the kitchen table with a sigh. The scent of stale beer and cigarettes lingered in the air, a stark reminder of Evie's wild night. My mind drifted back to Claire, to the sweetness of her kiss, the warmth of her body pressed against mine. I longed to hold her again, to feel her soft skin and hear her whisper my name in the darkness.

But the reality of our situation was like a cold shower, snapping me back to the present. I knew we were playing with fire, that our secret could not remain hidden forever. Yet, the thought of losing her was unbearable. I had to find a way to balance my love for her with my responsibilities as a father.

As soon as I got to work, the chaos of the day swallowed me whole. But amidst the emails and meetings, my mind kept drifting back to Claire. I couldn't ignore the gravity of the situation, and I knew I needed advice from someone I trusted. So, during a lull in the afternoon, I picked up my phone and called Mary.

"Hey, can you meet me for lunch?" I asked, trying to keep the urgency out of my voice.

Mary's voice was calm and collected as always. "Of course, what's up?"

"I need to talk," I said, keeping my voice low so no one in the office could hear. "It's about Evie."

Mary's tone grew concerned. "Is everything okay?"

"It's about Evie," I replied, my voice low so that the other employees couldn't overhear. "I need advice. Can we meet at the Walter's Diner?"

Mary's voice was a mix of worry and curiosity. "Sure, I'll be there in twenty."

The diner was a familiar place, one where we often went to grab a bite and discuss our kids' lives. But this time, it wasn't about her and Robert's job issues or my dating stress after Fiona died. This was about Evie, about the mess she'd stumbled into, and the even bigger mess we might make if I don't figure out what to do.

Mary arrived right on time, looking as put-together as ever. She slid into the booth opposite me, her eyes searching my face. "What's going on with Evie?" she asked immediately. "You sounded so serious on the phone."

I took a deep breath, bracing myself for the conversation I knew was going to be tough. "I don't know what to do," I admitted, my voice tight with worry. "She's out of control. Coming home at all hours, drunk, and being disrespectful to me. I take blame for some of it for spoiling her, but she has never been like this. I need some help because I don't know what to do."

Mary's expression was a mix of shock and concern. She had always known Evie to be a free spirit, but this was new territory even for her. "I had no idea it was that bad," she said, her voice gentle. "But remember, she's just going through a phase. She'll come around."

“I don't know, Mary," I replied, shaking my head. "It's like she's not even trying anymore."

Her eyes searched mine, looking for the truth. "What aren't you telling me, Rawls?" Could she tell that I had Claire on my mind or am I just being paranoid?

I took a deep breath, the weight of my secret pressing down on my chest like a boulder. "Evie... she's not going back to college," I admitted, the words feeling like shards of glass as they left my lips. "She's decided to take a break. For a while."

"Has she said why she wants to take a break? Is there some guy behind all of this? I know Claire said some guy brought her home and it was not a pleasant situation."

"It's not just a guy, Mary," I sighed, rubbing the bridge of my nose. "It's deeper than that. She's lost, and I don't know how to help her find her way back."

Mary's eyes widened in surprise, her grip tightening around the menu. "What do you mean?"

"She's decided to drop out for now," I said, the words feeling like a confession. "I don't know if it's the right decision, but it's what she wants. She’s been different since her sophomore year of college and I can’t get her to talk to me about it.”

Mary's eyes widened with shock. "Evie? Drop out of college?" she repeated, as if trying to process the words. "What happened? She was doing so well."

But I knew that wasn't the case. Evie had been flunking classes, bouncing from one major to another like a pinball machine. Her grades had been a mess for the past year, and I had been too busy with my own life to notice. The guilt of my neglect settled heavily in my gut like a rock. “She's lost her way, Mary," I said, my voice thick with regret. "I don't know how to get her back on track."

Mary sat back, her eyes searching mine. "Rawls, why didn't you tell me sooner? Maybe we could have helped her before it got to this point. Maybe Claire can talk to her and see if that will help. It may be something that with her social work could be of benefit to her." I appreciate her offer, but I wonder if that will do more harm than good. I had seen so many times that Evie was jealous of Claire and how well she was doing in school.

"Until she came home this last time, I had no idea that it was this bad. I have been so caught up in work lately that I just didn't see the signs that she needed help. If you think Claire could help that would be great. Maybe, if you don't mind, Evie and I can come over for dinner. Your house will be neutral territory and maybe Evie will be on her best behavior."

Mary did not hesitate for a second before acknowledging this would be a good idea. "I will talk to Robert and see what his schedule is and will let you know the best night. We need to do this soon. I will also talk to Claire when she gets home from work."

I hugged Mary and I headed back to work. I felt a lot better asking her for help. I hope Claire won't be upset about Mary and I both wanting her to try to help out Evie. This thing between us is so new and fragile and I do not want to do anything that would damage it.