Ashley POVBy the time I got home, with the two bags of food I'd bought in the evening from a famous fast food restaurant, it was already eleven o'clock at night. I was exhausted, even with the little rest my body might have enjoyed while dozing off in the car on the way home from the airport. Hot showers and beds had never been as appealing as they were that night, even with the scent of deep-fried food drifting into my nose and teasing my rumbling stomach. After all, sleep was the only bodily state in which I could forget about all my real life problems.Despite Jared's coming into my picture, Dad had suffered a heart attack. Despite my mom's warnings, I couldn't stop thinking about him and worrying about him. He could have died that very day. A chill ran down my spine at the thought.“Jayden?” I called as I lifted the bags onto the counter, a little surprised that he didn't come to see me. “I got dinner!”Sharpening my ears, I heard the midnight news in the background. The reporter
Ashley POVHe was right. Nearly twenty years together, he had every reason to say that he really knew me. If I tried to deny it, I was the fool, not him.“What I mean is that you can count on me,” he continued, quietly. “If there's anything you need, or you just want someone to talk to about anything, I'm here. Let me help you like you've helped me.”Maybe it was his eyes. Maybe it was his voice. Maybe it was just his presence, just him. Because no matter how hard I tried to push it away, the tightness and heaviness of what happened to my dad had settled inside me. It broke down my will, my determination, and all the boundaries I'd set for myself.Standing there, in the kitchen that had always been a kitchen, I felt ready to stop resisting Jayden. I was ready to let go of all the promises I had made to myself, put aside all previous thoughts, and just be with him.Damn it.Despite wanting nothing, I somehow managed to take my eyes off him. I needed a clear space, a splash of light, fr
Ashley POV“I'm not being a good friend, am I? Don't answer that,” Jayden added hurriedly with a bitter chuckle. He lowered his head in obvious defeat and snorted. “I'm not a good boyfriend, or a good mate, at all.”It hurt like hell, seeing him doubt himself like that. Though he did not show the fear and void he had before, the old fear and emptiness, I recognized the shadow in his voice. At the same time, his words shut down the resentment and anger that flared up inside me.He was not fully healed yet. He still needed me.My legs started to move closer to him, ready to convince him in whatever way, or almost any way..., but halted when he shook his head, his eyes still downcast. I felt my pants pocket vibrate, signaling a midnight text, but I chose to ignore it.“I'm too scared to see her.” His voice was like a whisper, like a candle in the middle of a city full of light. His fingers tightened around the edge of his cell phone. “I just... I just don't want to lose whatever it is th
Ashley POV“It's never going to be what you want,” I said softly. “I have my responsibilities and duties as the heiress of Red Moon Inc. just as you have your responsibilities and duties as, you know, Jayden Keller... the hunky celebrity and the golden man.”I sneaked a glance at him, trying to elicit a smile from him, but his face remained stony. His eyes showed no emotion. In the end, I had to look away again. “I have to put my parents and the company first,” I continued, “while you have to put your band members and your image first. Nothing is more important than that to you and me.”“Being forced into marriage is nothing,” I said candidly. “It's just like a drop in the ocean compared to what my parents have sacrificed and done and still continue to do. It's a star in the entire galaxy compared to how hard my grandfather fought and struggled throughout his life to establish this company. And while it's mostly a marriage of convenience now, it's not a bad deal. At least I know Jared
Ashley POVIt was almost eleven hours later when my eyelids finally snapped open. With a big yawn, I sat up in bed and stretched my upper body before dragging myself to the kitchen. The extra bed was empty as I walked by, and as I poured myself a glass of water, I spotted that there were already dishes in the sink.“Jayden?” I called out hesitantly.Hell, no. He wasn't there.As much as I was instantly relieved when I realized that, I'd be lying if I said I didn't feel a little sad. After all, it was surprisingly lonely having breakfast alone.And despite all the decisions yesterday, I still wanted to see him.The most likely scenario was that Jayden had left for a choreography dance rehearsal with his bandmates, especially since it had become such a routine that he no longer told me that he would be gone for most of the day. It was just that I felt it was a good idea to check the messages on my phone, just in case. And so, after making some warm oatmeal to satisfy my ravenous hunger,
Ashley POV“Ash! You home?”Quickly walking back to the entrance, I found Jayden crouching down and untying his shoelaces. He looked up at me, and despite his caramel brown eyes looking heavy with fatigue, his lips curved into a smile. “Did I just wake you up?”“It's Saturday,” I replied automatically. “Who cares if I wear pajamas all day? You look exhausted though,” I added, a little softer.He snorted. “Hunter's a tough trainer,” he replied as he got up and wriggled out of his boots. “But never mind, I'm starving and smell like shit. Let me shower first before we warm things up.”“About that...” I averted my gaze as a pair of curious caramel brown eyes immediately focused on me. “I have plans tonight.”“Oh?”I scratched my arm. “Yeah. With Jared. He'll pick me up around six.”“From here?”I nodded stiffly.“Okay. Looks like I'll have to eat the leftovers alone, then.”I looked up, stunned, and saw him smiling at me before he darted past me and into the bathroom. I had no idea what k
Ashley POVSmartly dressed in a suit and tie and polished leather shoes, Jared stood outside the apartment entrance, looking like he was ready to walk the red carpet. He had just finished shaving, revealing a clean jaw, and his dark hair was stylishly combed to the side along the neatly cut sides of his head. The scent of men's cologne and aftershave mingled with the sweet scent of flowers coming from the large bouquet of red roses he held in his left hand. I could see gold on his cuff and silver and black leather on his left wrist, which indicated a watch, and probably an expensive one.Compared to how he looked yesterday, for a moment I thought that I was hallucinating.Jared was also checking me out but seemed unfazed as my eyes were glued to him. “Good evening,” he greeted in a stiff, flat voice.“Hi,” I replied plainly. “Is David here too?”“He's waiting in the car.” Jared stepped closer to me and handed me the flowers. “Here. This is for you.”The bundle of roses was surprisingl
Ashley POVAs Jared and I walked out of the building, I spotted David parked and waiting in the car. But instead of going over to him, Jared stopped at the end of the concrete steps and pulled out a small red cardboard package. It was an automatic action, I could see that, from the way he pulled a lighter from the same pocket and pointed it at the cigarette already tucked between his lips.“Wait,” I chided, ”You can't smoke in here.”He glanced at me. “Why not?” he muttered, stroking his cigarette.Peeking over my shoulder, I glanced at the security guard outside the entrance. “That's illegal,” I said after making sure they weren't watching us.He didn't speak, but his lighter stopped halfway to his lips.“I'm not joking,” I continued. “It's illegal in almost all public places.”“I see.” He hurriedly lowered the lighter and stuffed the cigarette into his shirt pocket. “Where else can I go?”“Er.” I scratched my cheek and looked around for the smoking booth shyly. I didn't find one. “G
Ashley POVI rolled my eyes and used my other hand as a barrier to block my vision from seeing something I didn't want to see. “You'll never know,” I stated. “Better to be safe before you regret it.”“I'll go change in the bathroom,” he said with a grunt. “I just wanted you to know about the appointment.”His figure disappeared, and I let out a breath that I didn't realize I was holding. The allure of his scent was too strong for me, for some reason. “Why?” I asked without turning around.“Would you like to come along with me?”I frowned. “I can't,” I said quietly. “I'm going to see Jared that day. He and I... we're getting a ring.”It wasn't my idea, nor was it Jared's idea to do that. The first week in April, my parents returned here for a short break and to meet up with Jared before they were forced to return to London. According to my mom, their business venture there hadn't been entirely successful, and still needed more time before they came to a final agreement. Despite the bit
Ashley POVAs time ticked by, March ended and April slowly turned into May, I found myself and Jayden drifting further and further apart. It wasn't a deliberate move by either of us, or at least not a deliberate effort. It just happened.Jayden was spending more time at the dance studio, and he started coming home with a sore throat some days when he decided to hum along to the choreography. He started singing and reading the lyrics whenever he had time in my apartment, and despite me pretending not to notice, I actually did. I loved his voice, pleasant and velvety like that, soothing my mind and body. And he kept showing drastic improvement with each passing week. Also, when he wasn't dancing or singing or memorizing song lyrics, he went and exercised.“I'm getting fat,” he told me as he read comics on the extra bed one night.I was editing an essay at the time, and didn't think much of it until he mentioned it. “I guess not,” I replied bluntly with a shrug.“I've gained almost five
Ashley POVHe didn't speak, but he didn't need to. His silence was enough. However, the stubborn part of me wanted to push him to bring up the topic... more specifically, how he had been affected by his father.“What about you?” I continued cautiously.His eyes narrowed slightly as they scanned my face. “You know about Jayden,” he pointed out.I averted my eyes.“How long have you known?”He didn't sound accusatory, or angry. No, instead, there was something more familiar, something I also felt related to his... childhood.“Too long,” I replied stiffly. I didn't like being reminded of my mistakes, so I replied automatically, defensively with, “You?”“Me too.”And when my eyes locked with his, I saw that it was there. The endless shame, regret, and guilt. It reflected a part deep inside me, so much so that I could hardly bear to look at it.But I forced myself to do so. Because if I hated it, so did Jared. Yet he was brave enough to stick to his stance.Dinner ended shortly after that.
Ashley POVLooking at the menu, I already knew what I wanted to order. My mom's favorite dish at The Monarch was pasta with a sauce made from roasted oysters, so I went with that. By the time the waiter returned with our drinks, Jared and I were ready to order. She took the menus from us, and as I watched Jared pour himself a glass of dark red liquid, I decided to strike up a conversation that would hopefully shed some light on our upcoming wedding and Jayden. It took me a few precious minutes to gather my courage and organize my thoughts, but I finally went ahead with it.I started the conversation with a light topic. “How was Europe?”Jared quietly observed the interior design of the restaurant and kept doing so as he answered. “Warm,” he said, “and dirtier than I imagined. But also incredibly beautiful in moments I didn't think possible.”“How so?” I asked.“I often hitchhike with my group of friends,” he told me as he raised the wine glass to his lips. He took a slow sip, his eyes
Ashley POVAs Jared and I walked out of the building, I spotted David parked and waiting in the car. But instead of going over to him, Jared stopped at the end of the concrete steps and pulled out a small red cardboard package. It was an automatic action, I could see that, from the way he pulled a lighter from the same pocket and pointed it at the cigarette already tucked between his lips.“Wait,” I chided, ”You can't smoke in here.”He glanced at me. “Why not?” he muttered, stroking his cigarette.Peeking over my shoulder, I glanced at the security guard outside the entrance. “That's illegal,” I said after making sure they weren't watching us.He didn't speak, but his lighter stopped halfway to his lips.“I'm not joking,” I continued. “It's illegal in almost all public places.”“I see.” He hurriedly lowered the lighter and stuffed the cigarette into his shirt pocket. “Where else can I go?”“Er.” I scratched my cheek and looked around for the smoking booth shyly. I didn't find one. “G
Ashley POVSmartly dressed in a suit and tie and polished leather shoes, Jared stood outside the apartment entrance, looking like he was ready to walk the red carpet. He had just finished shaving, revealing a clean jaw, and his dark hair was stylishly combed to the side along the neatly cut sides of his head. The scent of men's cologne and aftershave mingled with the sweet scent of flowers coming from the large bouquet of red roses he held in his left hand. I could see gold on his cuff and silver and black leather on his left wrist, which indicated a watch, and probably an expensive one.Compared to how he looked yesterday, for a moment I thought that I was hallucinating.Jared was also checking me out but seemed unfazed as my eyes were glued to him. “Good evening,” he greeted in a stiff, flat voice.“Hi,” I replied plainly. “Is David here too?”“He's waiting in the car.” Jared stepped closer to me and handed me the flowers. “Here. This is for you.”The bundle of roses was surprisingl
Ashley POV“Ash! You home?”Quickly walking back to the entrance, I found Jayden crouching down and untying his shoelaces. He looked up at me, and despite his caramel brown eyes looking heavy with fatigue, his lips curved into a smile. “Did I just wake you up?”“It's Saturday,” I replied automatically. “Who cares if I wear pajamas all day? You look exhausted though,” I added, a little softer.He snorted. “Hunter's a tough trainer,” he replied as he got up and wriggled out of his boots. “But never mind, I'm starving and smell like shit. Let me shower first before we warm things up.”“About that...” I averted my gaze as a pair of curious caramel brown eyes immediately focused on me. “I have plans tonight.”“Oh?”I scratched my arm. “Yeah. With Jared. He'll pick me up around six.”“From here?”I nodded stiffly.“Okay. Looks like I'll have to eat the leftovers alone, then.”I looked up, stunned, and saw him smiling at me before he darted past me and into the bathroom. I had no idea what k
Ashley POVIt was almost eleven hours later when my eyelids finally snapped open. With a big yawn, I sat up in bed and stretched my upper body before dragging myself to the kitchen. The extra bed was empty as I walked by, and as I poured myself a glass of water, I spotted that there were already dishes in the sink.“Jayden?” I called out hesitantly.Hell, no. He wasn't there.As much as I was instantly relieved when I realized that, I'd be lying if I said I didn't feel a little sad. After all, it was surprisingly lonely having breakfast alone.And despite all the decisions yesterday, I still wanted to see him.The most likely scenario was that Jayden had left for a choreography dance rehearsal with his bandmates, especially since it had become such a routine that he no longer told me that he would be gone for most of the day. It was just that I felt it was a good idea to check the messages on my phone, just in case. And so, after making some warm oatmeal to satisfy my ravenous hunger,
Ashley POV“It's never going to be what you want,” I said softly. “I have my responsibilities and duties as the heiress of Red Moon Inc. just as you have your responsibilities and duties as, you know, Jayden Keller... the hunky celebrity and the golden man.”I sneaked a glance at him, trying to elicit a smile from him, but his face remained stony. His eyes showed no emotion. In the end, I had to look away again. “I have to put my parents and the company first,” I continued, “while you have to put your band members and your image first. Nothing is more important than that to you and me.”“Being forced into marriage is nothing,” I said candidly. “It's just like a drop in the ocean compared to what my parents have sacrificed and done and still continue to do. It's a star in the entire galaxy compared to how hard my grandfather fought and struggled throughout his life to establish this company. And while it's mostly a marriage of convenience now, it's not a bad deal. At least I know Jared