Ashley POV“I'm not being a good friend, am I? Don't answer that,” Jayden added hurriedly with a bitter chuckle. He lowered his head in obvious defeat and snorted. “I'm not a good boyfriend, or a good mate, at all.”It hurt like hell, seeing him doubt himself like that. Though he did not show the fear and void he had before, the old fear and emptiness, I recognized the shadow in his voice. At the same time, his words shut down the resentment and anger that flared up inside me.He was not fully healed yet. He still needed me.My legs started to move closer to him, ready to convince him in whatever way, or almost any way..., but halted when he shook his head, his eyes still downcast. I felt my pants pocket vibrate, signaling a midnight text, but I chose to ignore it.“I'm too scared to see her.” His voice was like a whisper, like a candle in the middle of a city full of light. His fingers tightened around the edge of his cell phone. “I just... I just don't want to lose whatever it is th
Ashley POV“It's never going to be what you want,” I said softly. “I have my responsibilities and duties as the heiress of Red Moon Inc. just as you have your responsibilities and duties as, you know, Jayden Keller... the hunky celebrity and the golden man.”I sneaked a glance at him, trying to elicit a smile from him, but his face remained stony. His eyes showed no emotion. In the end, I had to look away again. “I have to put my parents and the company first,” I continued, “while you have to put your band members and your image first. Nothing is more important than that to you and me.”“Being forced into marriage is nothing,” I said candidly. “It's just like a drop in the ocean compared to what my parents have sacrificed and done and still continue to do. It's a star in the entire galaxy compared to how hard my grandfather fought and struggled throughout his life to establish this company. And while it's mostly a marriage of convenience now, it's not a bad deal. At least I know Jared
Ashley POVIt was almost eleven hours later when my eyelids finally snapped open. With a big yawn, I sat up in bed and stretched my upper body before dragging myself to the kitchen. The extra bed was empty as I walked by, and as I poured myself a glass of water, I spotted that there were already dishes in the sink.“Jayden?” I called out hesitantly.Hell, no. He wasn't there.As much as I was instantly relieved when I realized that, I'd be lying if I said I didn't feel a little sad. After all, it was surprisingly lonely having breakfast alone.And despite all the decisions yesterday, I still wanted to see him.The most likely scenario was that Jayden had left for a choreography dance rehearsal with his bandmates, especially since it had become such a routine that he no longer told me that he would be gone for most of the day. It was just that I felt it was a good idea to check the messages on my phone, just in case. And so, after making some warm oatmeal to satisfy my ravenous hunger,
Ashley POV“Ash! You home?”Quickly walking back to the entrance, I found Jayden crouching down and untying his shoelaces. He looked up at me, and despite his caramel brown eyes looking heavy with fatigue, his lips curved into a smile. “Did I just wake you up?”“It's Saturday,” I replied automatically. “Who cares if I wear pajamas all day? You look exhausted though,” I added, a little softer.He snorted. “Hunter's a tough trainer,” he replied as he got up and wriggled out of his boots. “But never mind, I'm starving and smell like shit. Let me shower first before we warm things up.”“About that...” I averted my gaze as a pair of curious caramel brown eyes immediately focused on me. “I have plans tonight.”“Oh?”I scratched my arm. “Yeah. With Jared. He'll pick me up around six.”“From here?”I nodded stiffly.“Okay. Looks like I'll have to eat the leftovers alone, then.”I looked up, stunned, and saw him smiling at me before he darted past me and into the bathroom. I had no idea what k
Ashley POVSmartly dressed in a suit and tie and polished leather shoes, Jared stood outside the apartment entrance, looking like he was ready to walk the red carpet. He had just finished shaving, revealing a clean jaw, and his dark hair was stylishly combed to the side along the neatly cut sides of his head. The scent of men's cologne and aftershave mingled with the sweet scent of flowers coming from the large bouquet of red roses he held in his left hand. I could see gold on his cuff and silver and black leather on his left wrist, which indicated a watch, and probably an expensive one.Compared to how he looked yesterday, for a moment I thought that I was hallucinating.Jared was also checking me out but seemed unfazed as my eyes were glued to him. “Good evening,” he greeted in a stiff, flat voice.“Hi,” I replied plainly. “Is David here too?”“He's waiting in the car.” Jared stepped closer to me and handed me the flowers. “Here. This is for you.”The bundle of roses was surprisingl
Ashley POVAs Jared and I walked out of the building, I spotted David parked and waiting in the car. But instead of going over to him, Jared stopped at the end of the concrete steps and pulled out a small red cardboard package. It was an automatic action, I could see that, from the way he pulled a lighter from the same pocket and pointed it at the cigarette already tucked between his lips.“Wait,” I chided, ”You can't smoke in here.”He glanced at me. “Why not?” he muttered, stroking his cigarette.Peeking over my shoulder, I glanced at the security guard outside the entrance. “That's illegal,” I said after making sure they weren't watching us.He didn't speak, but his lighter stopped halfway to his lips.“I'm not joking,” I continued. “It's illegal in almost all public places.”“I see.” He hurriedly lowered the lighter and stuffed the cigarette into his shirt pocket. “Where else can I go?”“Er.” I scratched my cheek and looked around for the smoking booth shyly. I didn't find one. “G
Ashley POVLooking at the menu, I already knew what I wanted to order. My mom's favorite dish at The Monarch was pasta with a sauce made from roasted oysters, so I went with that. By the time the waiter returned with our drinks, Jared and I were ready to order. She took the menus from us, and as I watched Jared pour himself a glass of dark red liquid, I decided to strike up a conversation that would hopefully shed some light on our upcoming wedding and Jayden. It took me a few precious minutes to gather my courage and organize my thoughts, but I finally went ahead with it.I started the conversation with a light topic. “How was Europe?”Jared quietly observed the interior design of the restaurant and kept doing so as he answered. “Warm,” he said, “and dirtier than I imagined. But also incredibly beautiful in moments I didn't think possible.”“How so?” I asked.“I often hitchhike with my group of friends,” he told me as he raised the wine glass to his lips. He took a slow sip, his eyes
Ashley POVHe didn't speak, but he didn't need to. His silence was enough. However, the stubborn part of me wanted to push him to bring up the topic... more specifically, how he had been affected by his father.“What about you?” I continued cautiously.His eyes narrowed slightly as they scanned my face. “You know about Jayden,” he pointed out.I averted my eyes.“How long have you known?”He didn't sound accusatory, or angry. No, instead, there was something more familiar, something I also felt related to his... childhood.“Too long,” I replied stiffly. I didn't like being reminded of my mistakes, so I replied automatically, defensively with, “You?”“Me too.”And when my eyes locked with his, I saw that it was there. The endless shame, regret, and guilt. It reflected a part deep inside me, so much so that I could hardly bear to look at it.But I forced myself to do so. Because if I hated it, so did Jared. Yet he was brave enough to stick to his stance.Dinner ended shortly after that.
Jayden POV23.02 - Fine, I'll go get your stuff. See you in five minutes?23.02 - Perfect! Hey, baby, you're not mad at me, right?Rolling my eyes, I replied with the word “No”. To be frank, I'm not mad at her. I'm just tired of her. Blair was prettier than most, very talented, and kind despite being more of a loner than Jean and overall she was a very nice girl. She is the kind of girl that guys dream about, because of her sweet and lovable nature, her graceful and slender figure. In fact, she was exactly what I wanted when I first laid eyes on her. I used to think I could finally fall in love, and it would be with her because she's almost perfect in every way. I mean, how could a guy not like a woman like Blair?At first, it was fun and exciting. I had never had someone... someone who I knew was definitely interested in me and talked to me for twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week. She made me break down my walls, to the point where I felt I could trust her. I thought I could
Jayden POV—Flashback a few hours before the accident after the concert in NY in February—“Good job, everyone! That's a wrap for our concert in NY!”Clark escorted the seven of us from backstage to one of the leather couches in the dressing room before darting off somewhere. Some of the other coordinators and managers who had been with us for a few months to a few years came next, all with smiles on their faces. I poured the last contents of my water bottle over my head to cool down as I sat next to Jax. The liquid dripped down my face, neck, and back, soaking the black T-shirt I wore at the end of the concert, and though it felt relatively warm, I was still able to breathe a sigh of relief.“There's a place called the bathroom.” Tyler leaned over to my right and tugged gently on my sleeve. “Man, you're soaked.”“You too,” I retorted as I stared intently at his hair stuck to his forehead.“I'm starving,” whimpered Jean as he fanned himself frantically with someone's magazine. He plop
Ashley POVJayden was checking himself out in the massive mirror, eyes trailing from head to toe. His dyed light brown hair was a mess, and he had just enough makeup on to cover the small scar on his left cheek. Titanium earrings dangled from his ears, and rings wrapped around his fingers. He wore a red bomber jacket over a teal patterned shirt, paired with tight— very tight— black skinny jeans and branded sneakers to complete the look.“Hey,” he greeted, locking eyes with me through the mirror.I pushed a rolling clothing rack filled with expensive-looking shirts and jackets. “No white tees? What’s going on?” I asked.Jayden let out a small laugh. “Sorry to disappoint,” he replied, adjusting his collar. “Anyway, where have you been? I’ve been looking everywhere for you.”“I was at the mall,” I lied, trying my hardest not to rub my wrist. “I’m actually feeling kinda sick. I don’t know if I can stay for the whole concert.”He immediately turned to me. “You have to,” he said, a hint of
Ashley POVChugging his water bottle, Jayden turned his attention back to his friends. Miles, however, kept sneaking glances at me, his expression unreadable. I gave him a small smile anyway, hoping to reassure him that I was fine.A lie, of course. I was fine. I just had no idea how.“Are you and Miles having a thing or...?”My jaw practically hit the floor, and I gawked at Blair in disbelief. “What?” I blurted, unable to hide my shock. “Of course not!”She tapped a finger against her chin, flashing me an apologetic smile. “Sorry, that was kind of fishy.” She came closer, the scent of her strawberry perfume stinging my nose even more. “Come on, we’re friends. You can tell me.”I was this close to telling her that friendship didn’t work that way. Hell, I wanted to punch her square in the jaw. But I managed to hold back and just shook my head. “No, really,” I said, sneakily shifting away from her. “There’s nothing going on between me and him. Or anyone else in this group, for that matt
Ashley POVAs Clark and I stepped out onto the empty stands on the east side of the arena, the music was blasting.He left me alone when a female staff member hesitantly approached us, wanting to talk to him about something backstage. He apologized for having to leave so suddenly, but I assured him I’d be fine. Honestly, he could’ve walked away without me even noticing.Because there were seven guys dancing in the middle of the brightly lit stage, I couldn't take my eyes off them.Or, more specifically, the one wearing gray sweatpants, a loose white T-shirt, and yellow-branded boots.Jayden Keller.The last time I saw him dance, I was honestly shocked. Not because he was bad— far from it. It was just… before, I’d seen him dance like there was nothing else in the world except the stage, the audience, and the rhythm of the music. When he performed, he became someone entirely different… No, he transformed into something more than just a regular person. His singing and dancing wove togeth
Ashley POVMonday was chill. I spent the day wandering around the area near my hotel, snapping pictures of the city. Somewhere along the way, I stumbled upon a hobby store packed with all kinds of trinkets and ended up buying some dolls and tiny figurines for Eva before heading back. I also swung by a small shop to grab some snacks.A hot shower melted away my exhaustion, and soon enough, I was lounging on the bed in a ridiculously oversized bathrobe, binge-watching N*****x for hours. I meant to change into my pajamas, but I crashed before I even got the chance.For a moment, I floated in darkness— no real-life drama, no danger, just peace.Then, a buzzing noise across the room yanked me out of my sleep. Still half-asleep, I clumsily rolled out of bed and made my way to the desk where I'd left my phone charging. My eyes fluttered as I tried to shake off the drowsiness. It was bright outside, but I didn’t really stop to think about it.Not until I, still groggy, picked up the call and h
Ashley POVIt wasn’t jealousy or some masochistic urge that led me to my newest idea. No, seriously, it wasn’t. Honestly, I just wanted to know more about her, because she was the reason behind everything that happened that night at the stadium back in February. Because I could swear she had planned every single one of those so-called coincidental meetings between me and Jayden, which eventually led to the accident and his amnesia.I mean, I had no solid proof, but judging by the way she acted and spoke… something felt off. My gut just told me so.I didn’t think Blair had planned for Jayden to go on a drunken rampage afterward and get hit by a car— especially judging by how damn annoying she was in the Silvercross Healing Center parking lot— but she sure as hell wasn’t innocent, either. But I also knew she hadn’t known about my engagement to Jayden at the time, which was obvious from Jayden’s own words and what she said to me after he kicked her out of his hospital room.Besides, I st
Ashley POVThe streets weren’t exactly empty, but David had been circling the block for the past half hour, worried about my safety. That’s why he managed to pull up right where he had dropped me off just a few minutes later. Before getting into the car, still a little tipsy, I waved goodbye to the BHB band members— except for Jayden and Jamie, who were still upstairs looking for something they’d left behind.Even though it felt kinda weird leaving without saying goodbye to everyone, maybe it was for the best that I didn’t see Jayden again. At least, not that night.I had to wipe my eyes more than a few times on the way home. Not even the alcohol could numb the sharp ache in my chest.The moment I got back, I collapsed onto my bed and passed out.The next morning, fighting off a pounding headache, I came to the conclusion that my trip to Milan needed to be about more than just Jayden’s concert. I had to make this trip for myself too. And since Eva was too busy to come along and Jared
Ashley POVIf my brain wasn’t so clouded with exhaustion and alcohol, I might’ve reacted properly to what he just said. But right now, I was way more drunk than I wanted to admit. I pushed aside every thought fighting for space in my head, whether real or not, because his body heat and the scent of white musk, soap, and just him made something inside me shiver with longing. I didn’t trust myself in this state. I didn’t trust myself when my lips were this close to his neck, where his scent was strongest.So instead, I focused on one thing— holding on."Ash, I have a question."He had already reached the second floor, adjusting his grip on me. I glanced at him, curious, urging him to continue. "Shoot.""I was wondering if you’d come to our show at the end of May," he said quietly as he stepped onto the last staircase. "I know it’s around finals, but..." I felt him swallow hard. "I want you to be there. To see us, to see me... perform."I pretended to think about it for a second, but hon