Chapter 5

Ophelia

A knock sounded on the door, making me wake up in fright. Ryan's cry reached my ear as I stood up to open the door.

Why was he crying? Was he hurt? Or did he fall? With multiple questions in my mind, I opened the door.

Ryder stood in front of my door with a crying Ryan in his arms. “What happened to him?” I asked as I collected Ryan from Ryder. “He woke up crying” he simply said.

As if hearing my voice, Ryan's cries reduced and started having little hiccups. “Why were you crying my champ?” I asked as I carried him with me inside the room and Ryder followed.

The room seems smaller with him inside. His eyes roamed his eyes around the room before settling back on me.

I ignored him and gave my attention to Ryan. I checked him but there was nothing wrong with him. What could have made him cry?

Still trying to find out the cause of the cry, Ryan started pulling on his clothes. It finally dawned on me. He wasn't comfortable in his clothes.

I took off his clothes and went to the bathroom to bathe him. “Was this why you were crying? You should start talking so you will tell me anything,” I said, and his beautiful eyes just stared at me.

“Dada,” he said with a cute smile. “Okay. I won't scold you” I carried him and went to give him to Ryder. “He is calm now,” I said to him, giving Ryan to him, but Ryan clenched to my nightwear.

Ryder tried getting him to come to his arms but Ryan wasn't having it. He clenched my clothes more. 

“I will put him to sleep, then you can have him,” I told Ryan after failed attempts to get him to go to Ryder, and he nodded. I laid beside him and started patting his back. 

Ryder just stood in the room like a sore thumb and watched us. I wonder what was going on in his mind. 

Does he despise me more for Ryan choosing me over him? Or does he think I am taking over his space in Ryan's life? I have gotten more emotionally closer and attached to Ryan.

He was the ray of sunshine I have been missing in my life. I looked at his face but couldn't help noticing Ryder and Olivia's features in him. He has Ryan's blue eyes, nose, and face but takes Olivia's black hair. He is the mixture of them both. He looks so cute and adorable. 

“Can I have him now?”

“What?” I asked, lost in my thoughts of Ryan. 

“Can I have him?” He asked again and I realized Ryan was fast asleep. 

“Sorry,” I muttered and handed Ryan back to him, our hands brushing, causing electric sparks to travel from my hand to the bottom of my stomach.

Raising my eyes, I saw the flash of surprise in his eyes before they turned dark. We both stood staring at each other. His eyes flickered between my eyes and my lips. 

To stop myself from uttering any word I would regret later, I bit my lips and the action didn't go well with Ryder. 

He came closer to me and used his finger to remove the strand of hair that fell on my face while still maintaining eye contact with me. 

I could feel his breath fanning my face and it was arousing what I didn't know was in me. His finger trailed the back of my ear and I released my lips between my teeth and gasped.

“Ryder,” I whispered, and his face started coming close to mine.

Is he going to kiss me? Oh my God, he is going to kiss me. My stomach flipped and I slowly closed my eyes. 

I have wanted this for some time now. I have always imagined Ryder kissing me. I have always wanted to feel the taste of him against my lips. Even after he married Olivia.

Olivia! I opened my eyes and took three steps from him. His eyes flickered open and there was confusion in them. “I am sorry” I whispered.

The next minute, his eyes turned darker in anger, and a look of disgust appeared in his eyes, disgust for me. I felt a bang in my chest at the sight of his gaze.

“I don't want to see you anywhere around me. I don't want you seducing me,” He said after a moment of silence between us, and my eyes became teary.

“I would never—” 

“It should just be about Ryan between the both of us, nothing more” he interrupted me. I nodded my head while keeping my tears from falling, afraid that if I opened my mouth, a cry would slip out.

His eyes lingered on me for a moment before he left my room with Ryan in his hands. 

The tears fell from my eyes after the door closed behind him. The picture of his disgust playing in my head all over. It wasn't the first time he looked at me with disgust but the pain was still there like the first time.

He shouldn't have control over me and my emotions. Yes, I was in love with him for more than 5 years. I wanted him and even went too far for his approval but I wasn't going to do that again.

I used those years loving him and desiring him. Even going as far as almost ruining my sister's wedding and all I have ever gotten was rejections and hurt.

I am not going to be the girl I used to be. I am going to stop loving him. I would not cry over him again. In fact, I will ignore him as far as I can. 

It can't be that hard to do or can it?