Hunter and I are back to the way we were before and I cannot be happier. There is still a lot of things hanging in the air, like the Sloane Empire, but we will have that discussion when we are ready.
What only matters now is the baby.
I am six weeks pregnant.
The morning sickness has started, and I am starting to feel the best parts of being an expecting mother. I have stopped counting how many times Hunter rubs my belly a day. He has, in the times that I really get sick, he has started reading to our baby. We decided that we do not want to know what the sex of the baby is, even though I still firmly believe it is a boy. We need something to look forward to, not only the pregnancy but the joy of a surprise.
So it is with great difficulty that I am finding something to wear. Even though I do not keep much in these days, I have grown rather bigger than what Hunter likes to refer to as a bus. This rules out the option of trying to fit into one of my favorite
…Raven POV…We finally make our way back home after what was a very emotional experience. I am glad that we did it, for it has brought Hunter and me once closer again. It feels that nothing but only me and him exists.As we finally arrive at home, he takes me through the lounge and lays me down on the cushions of the soft couch; he moves in beside me until his body is right next to mine."So," he stretches his sentence as he does when he is thinking."What are you thinking about?""Hahaha. Who said I was thinking? Maybe I am asking?""What are you asking then, Hunter?""Can I kiss you?" He flutters his eyelashes as he asks."Why on earth are you asking?""I cannot go…"I place my fingers against his soft lips and wrap his face in my hands. I pull his face closer until there is nothing but a mere breath between our lips. Then I softly whisper. "I thought you would never ask."&hell
…Raven POV…Hunter is rushing me to the Doctor.I have had some bleeding and he is concerned, well, not only him, I am goddamn terrified.It is with great speed that Hunter is navigating his way through the city streets. In less than what seems like fifteen minutes we come to a screeching halt in the parking lot at the Hospital.So as we wander down the hallway to Doctor’s rooms, Hunter takes my hand and looks at me, “Everything is going to be okay.”As with always, once we arrive at the room, I put on the awful gown and lay down on the bed. The Doctor is running late; the damn anticipation is killing me. Each second that he takes too long, it feels as if my heart is slowly being cut from my chest. I, too, need to know that my baby is okay.After what seems like an endless half an hour, the Doctor finally steps into the room, "Hunter, Raven, I am so sorry about that. I had an emergency birth. Now let us take a
It has been a week since Raven lost the baby; she seems to have settled down, feeling a lot better. But even though her face carries a smile, it does not seem to reach her eyes.I am afraid that our relationship is going to fall apart in a spectacular way. I have, on many occasions, come close to asking her where our relationship stands, but then I remember that she is under a lot of pressure and that I should not dump anymore than what she is carrying.After all, she is still dealing with the loss of our child, which I, can honestly say, have not been dealing with in a good way. I cannot say that I have come to deal with it because I have not, and I do not think that I ever will.So I find myself here, early morning, sitting outside as I do with so many mornings alone now and think of how much different things should have been. This is not the way that I have planned my life, and most of all, my relationship to be.We are like strangers in one house; I t
She has done it again.She makes love to me, then she hits me with that.Is she honestly for real? Why? Our relationship is not that bad. We still have a lot to fight for. Why is she giving up now?Not wanting to fight with her after all that we have just been through I sit up and listen to her. With the deepest affection that I hold in my heart for her, I take her hand for I know what is about to come and god! I cannot bear to go through this again.This is fucking killing me."Raven, what do you mean?""Hunter, I think you know.""Now I don't, please talk to me. Tell me the truth.""There is no us anymore."She shakes her head, the agony of her words comes through, and just when I think the words won't kill me, then I see her crying."Hunter, our relationship is not working. I cannot see how we can go on like this.""I don't understand."With that, the agony that is hiding behind my voice burst int
As I stand in the quiet corners of my room, I dread to make this call to Raven. Yes, what was our love lay completely in tatters, and in a way, I know that I can make peace with that.What? Not for one fucking minute am I accepting that.It takes me a very deep breath, and with a rather big lump in my throat, I finally speak as she answers."Hey, princess.""Hunter.""Listen, I do not want to fight, but I need you to tell me whatever it is that you have been trying to say.""Hunter, I think you need to sit down for this.""My god, Raven, what have you done?""Please, just listen until I have finished, and then you can say whatever you feel that you need to say. I don't think that, well apart from this, that there is any more damage that can be done between us.""Raven, just tell me what is going on."As she hesitates for several moments, I start to pace the length of my room, waiting for her to speak. And as she f
I toss my phone over the length of the table, but before it hits the floor, somewhere is there to catch it. As I look up, with eyes that are turmoiling in more tears than they really should, I look into the soft chocolate brown eyes of Maddison."Maddison.""Hi, Hunter."It is hard to say which comes first, but the moment those words come flowing from lips that I know is sweeter than honey, that ache I felt not so long ago has now disappeared."When did you get here?""This morning. I would have come to say hello sooner but have been so busy settling into the new place.""So what? Are you back? Are you staying?""Yes, this time I am staying."Maddison looks at me as she places her hand softly onto my trembling hand that feels far colder than it truly should. Her smile is warm as her eyes meet mine,"Sorry, but I heard the end. Do you want to talk about it?""Sorry about that. I guess I just had to get that off my
It has been three weeks since things between Raven and me have fallen apart. I have come, in my own weird way, to accept that it has come to a spectacular end. I have on the occasion, and might I say too many, but I have had the desire to phone her. I find myself with my phone in hand near sending her a message quite often. But between Mason and Maddison, I have managed to come to a point where I can say that I am moving on, slowly but at a certain pace.It is early morning; it is still dead silent. I have come to the only place where I can breathe and free my mind. My office. As I sit here with my eyes closed, just as I am completely drifting off into my own mind, I hear a scuffle behind me."What the fuck, Maddison?""Whoa, Hunter. Is that the way to greet a woman?""Why the hell are you sneaking up on me?""Came to bring you coffee."She reaches over to me and hands me the hot steamy coffee that buys from the Bistro around the corner from
I don't know why, but I ignored Raven's phone call. I don't think that my heart is ready to speak to her again yet. I somehow cannot help but wonder what it is that she wanted. Well, I can only think of one thing, things with her and Jax fell through, and she wants me to let her back into my life.That is simply not going to happen.I can say that I have slowly started to move on with my life. Yes, Maddison has been a welcomed distraction, and yes, after all these years, I still have those feelings for her that I once had. She was a part of my life when everything was dark, and I felt lost.We were together for a good couple of years, and that is when I met Raven. She saw that my focus was not on us anymore, and we both decided to end it.Yes, perhaps she is saving me from myself and from a broken heart, and there is the possibility that she is a rebound. But there are things that a man can simply not do alone. Now, all we have done was kissed that one ti