KABANATA 4

 Summer na, kaya the Revalde are preparing for a vacation outside the country. Kaya nag-iimpake na ako nang gamit ni Chance, pa'no ang tamad. Tinawagan pa tuloy ako ni ma’am at sir dahil ayaw ni Chance ipagalaw ang mga gamit niya sa iba.

          “I’ll be gone for 2 months; I will miss you,” he said, and sight.

          “I’m gonna miss you too.”

          I’m currently working as a waitress and I didn’t know that it was owned by the sister of Dame. So basically, my days were not that bad because I have someone that I could talk to. Ang swerte ko nga kasi nag-iisa lang ang coffee shop na to dito sa province.

          “Where’s Chance? I haven’t seen him with you this days.” He asked.

          “Ah, nagbabakasyon kasi sila sa ibang bansa.” Ani ko habang umiinom ng kape while looking at the moon. Naalala ko tuloy yung kwintas na bigay niya sa leeg ko.

          “I really like you, Ivy. If you’re worried that you might lose your scholarship, I can give you that. Your duty is still the same, kumbaga kung anong ginagawa mo dun pwedeng ganun lang rin samin.”

          Napalingon ako sa sinabi niya, is he serious?

          “Sino naman ang aalagaan ko aber? HAHAAHAHA,” natatawang sabi ko.

          “Me,”nakangiti niyang sambit.

          Napahawak ako sa tiyan ko sa katatawa. Grabe naman talaga ang humor nang lalaking to.

          “What are you laughing at, I’m dead serious. Besides mas maganda yon kasi di kita mapormahan habang nasa poder ka ng batang 'yon”

          “That boy likes you, Ivy. Hindi mo lang mapansin pero ang raming nagkakagusto sayo, hindi lang makaporma dahil takot sila. And guess what, I am not.”

          Nag-aya na akong umuwi kasi gabi narin. But the real reason ay hindi na ako komportable sa huling sinabi niya. Masyado naman atang impossible yun, ang bata pa ni Chance, he’s barely 15, I think. Kung totoo man ay infatuation lang 'yon.

          We still continue to talk, nagtratrabaho narin kasi siya sa coffee shop as cashier. Inuuto nga niya ako na gusto lang niyang makasama ako. Sometimes we go out, pero I made it clear to him na were just friends. I was about to sleep nung may tumawag sakin, overseas call.

          “Hello!”

          “You’ve been working this summer?”

          “Yes,” kasabay no'n ang buntong hininga ko

          “With whom? Dame?” I dunno why I felt like I made a sin, the way he asked me made me shiver. I can’t even answer him right away because I’m scared of his reaction.

          “Y-yes,”

          Hindi ko alam kung ilang minutos na puro ingay lang ng palaka sa paligid ang naririnig ko. No one dared to talk and ayoko rin naman mag salita.

          “I'm going back to the Philippines, and please resign to your job. We will talk once Im back,” aniya saka pinatay ang tawag.

          Huling linggo ko na sa Embrace coffee shop, I'm super excited kasi finally makukuha ko  na ang sweldo ko. Dame asked me for a dinner date tonight, I'm just wearing a jacket with an inner top and fitted jeans with a simple Nike shoe.

          He brought me to the nearest restaurant along with the guest house na kadalasang pinag babakasyonan ng mga turista na gusto ring mag relax. I know it’s quite expensive here, because all of the surrounding are screaming with elegance. The waitress guides us to our seats, I noticed that were far from the actual guest who are already eating.

          Our talks have never been cut because we have the same preferences of ideas. We're actually discussing our future plans after we graduate.

          “I'm really serious about pursuing you, Ivy. If only you will allow me to court you this time.”

          “I don’t know what to say, I mean why me? There are girls whose much better than me, iyong mayaman, maganda at mabait.” Ani ko.

          “I don’t know too, all I know is I like you.” Umiiling at ngumingiti niyang sabi.

          Good thing that our dessert arrived already, I'm actually thankful because the tension between us have been lighted up. I have a creamy strawberry flavored ice cream and a melted chocolate with a marshmallow. While Dame ordered a chocolate moist cake.

          “You’re a good man Dame, I don’t know if I'm ready to take our friendship to the next level. This kind of thing you have for me is so new and if ever we became lovers I don’t know if I will be able to give you my all attention that you deserve. You know my family situation, were tied up with a responsibility to the Revalde” mahinahon kong paliwanag.

          “Basted na ba ako? I completely understand, Ivy. Having a relationship while in college was never in my mind, not until I met you. So maybe this time is not my lucky time to make you entertain my feelings toward you.” Aniya.

          Pagkatapos ng usapan namin ay agad rin naman akong nagyaya pauwi. If maybe I'm not in a complicated situation in my life, I will probably be his girlfriend. The way he handled my rejection kanina was very ideal for him as a man. He respects my decision and I admire him for that.

          Pagkapara ng sasakyan ay pinagbuksan niya ulit ako. He said his goodbye pero hinintay niya muna akong makarating sa may pintuan ng bahay namin. I turned on the light sa may sala, pumunta muna ako sa kusina para uminom ng tubig tsaka napagpasyahang kumuha muna ng damit sa kwarto para makapag half bath muna. I went to sleep after I take a shower, Im so tired, and I know ots gonna be a long day tomorrow.

          I just woke up, pagkababa ko ay agad akong inanyayahan ni mama na kumain. Nauna na raw pumasok si papa dahil nagpapasundo raw si Chance, oh well! Ngayon na pala ang dating non. Pagkapasok ko sa Embrace ay agad na akong nagpalit ng uniform, I will miss working here. Dame and I were still okay, we talked and laugh just like the old days.

          Nagsasara na kami nung may biglaang pumara na sasakyan sa harap. Di ko alam kung bakit todo nguso si Dame, pagkaligon ko ay si Chance pala na kabababa palang sa sasakyan. Dali-daling lumapit si Dame ay may ibinulong, I don’t know what up with him because hes too close to me than the usual person na may sasabihin lang.

          “Gusto sana kitang ihatid kaso alam kong 'di papayag yung batang 'yon, hayaan mo muna ako sa gagawin ko para naman makabawi ako dahil mukhang di'na ata kita malalapitan ng maayos sa school nito.” Sabi niya na medyo tumatawa, hindi ko maintindihan ang ibig niyang sabihin pero ng hinalikan niya ako sa gilid ng labi ay napatulala ako, gago 'yon ah HAHAHAHA.

          Agad naman siyang naglakad papalayo kaya napasulyap ako kay Chance tiim ang bagang na umiiling-iling sa gilid. Pinabayaan ko lamg siya kaya kinuha ko muna ang gamit ko bago lumapit.

          “Get in,” aniya at pinagbuksan ako.

          Sobrang tahimik habang nag byabyahe kami, alam kong hindi ito ang daan papunta sa amin kaya binasag ko na ang katahimikan at agad na nagtanong.

          “Where are we going?” mahinahon kong tanong habang lumiko sa ibang direksyon ang sasakyan.

          “Seat back and relax, I just want to eat with you.”

          We arrived at the same restaurant that Dame and I had eaten. I was shocked when he suddenly held my waist while walking to our seats, pa simple ko itong tinatanggal para walang nakakahalata but the more na tinatanggal ay mas lalo pa atang humigpit ang hawak niya. Hinayaan kona rin lang dahil mukhang nahalata na ng waiter ang nangyayari samin. Isabay mopa ang nakakunot na noo ni Chance na para bang anytime ay sasabog na siya sa galit.

          We started eating as soon as the menu has arrived. I didn’t order anything just like him pero laking gulat ko na puro paborito ko ang nasa hapag ng lamesa. We ate silently, or maybe I’m so busy eating that I did not mind to have any conversation with him. Gosh! Im so full.

          “So how’s the vacation abroad?” basag ko sa katahimikan, besides ang weird naman kong titingnan kolang siya na kumakain parin.

          “Its fine,” tingnan mo talaga ang mokong nato, kung ako nakapunta sa ibang bansa siguro ang dami kong kwento. Pero sabagay, ang mayayaman na katulad nila ay dina bago ang pamamamasyal outside the country.

          “So you became his girlfriend now?”

          “We’re just friends, that’s all.” Final kong sabi.

          “Hmm….so friends do kiss now, huh!”

          “Are you done eating? I'm tired now, its been a long day for me.” Palusot ko dahil ayoko nang humaba pa ang usapan at mauuwi lang sa di pagkakaintindihan.

          “You’re avoiding the topic”

          Hindi na ako nagsalita dahil totoo naman. Akala ko wala siyang dessert na order kaya nung dumating ay mas nagtagal pa kami. Ang bagal niyang kumain, samantalang ako kanina pa tapos.

          Ganun parin nung papalabas na kami, nahihiya tuloy ako dahil ang raming nakatingin. Mayaman sila, kaya kilala siya halos lahat ng tao sa Bahud. Yumuko nalang ako para naman kahit papano ay hindi ako makilala ng iba. Pagkaparada ng sasakyan ay bumaba kami pareho, kaya sinabi ko na ang dapat sabihin para tumigil na siya.

          “I want you to stop what you are doing, Chance” aniya ko habang hinahawakan an gate.

          “At last, you recognize what I feel towards you, but I didn’t this could be our conversation. And you wanted me to stop? Hell no!”

          “You’re just a child, Chance. Ive been in that situation too, its okay for me if you like me but please, lets not ruin what we have already. Try to divert your attention to the girls out there. The feeling that you have for me is just admiration, okay.” Paliwanag ko, ayoko siyang masaktan or mawala ang confidence niya sa babae. Thank God he did not dare to talk back, maybe he realized what I’ve is true. He just said his Goodbye.