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Chapter 25
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2024-10-29 19:42:56The peaceful sound of rain wakes me. I love the sound of rain. I glance at the soft glow of the alarm clock on my bedside. It’s 4:12 am. I roll onto my back and peek over at Luke. He’s sleeping soundly.
I wish I could sleep as peacefully as he does. At least we’ve got through the baby thing. I can’t pinpoint why, but I still feel at odds.
I try to go back to sleep, but the radio of voices inside my head is getting loud. I don’t think there’s any point in trying to go back to sleep when the voices are practically shouting.
With a small sigh, I get up out of bed, throw on my fav jagger tee and lounge pants. I grab my phone and pick up my kindle and wireless earbuds on the way to my balcony.
My building has no obstructed views of the ocean. It’s beautiful watching the sunrise from here, but it’s still a little early.
It’s why I brought such a large outdoor day bed. It’s almost like a little c
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As soon as I get out of my car, I put my earbuds in and blast my music. It’s been a day and I could use either silence or music to chill. I stop by the foyer and pick up the mail before heading up to my apartment. I flick through my mail as I walk in. So many damn bills this month. Benny bumps my leg; I pet him absentmindedly and head straight to my bedroom. I kick my shoes off and pad over to my study, fire up my laptop I might as well pay them now. I definitely need to have a chat with Abby. She’s overspending on the new flip. I always have to rein her in. The Divinyls blast in my ears–Touch myself. Oh, the memories this song brings. I sing to myself, shut my laptop down and feed Mr Benny. I look longingly at my bathtub, but I think I’d rather take a shower. I grab some fresh clothes; my shower’s busted so I have to use the guest bathroom. The plumber’s coming tomorrow, thank goodness. Fucking hell, Dax has let himself in today. He’s s
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It’s been an interesting couple of days without Luke. After his meetings with his brothers, he had to leave and travel all over Australia to complete business transactions and check their other businesses while out there.Still, we talk every day and night, no matter what, and I love it.We were both hoping that he would be back tonight. But his brothers knocked out another deal in Brisbane, so Luke will stay another night.This evening has been really great. The band took advantage of Ren being here and invited him to be our “Secret special guest”. The turnout is incredible, and it’s been so much fun singing with Ren again.Our set’s done now we get to party. Usually, Justin will do a DJ set, but tonight Joe hired an up-and-coming DJ so we can celebrate Ren’s farewell. He is going back on the road with his band.“Here you go, Drink up.” Joe shouts over the music as he places dozens of s
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Sunday couldn’t have come any sooner. After my therapy session with Eva on Friday, I feel loads better and haven’t had a hallucination since my brief episode.Luke’s been so busy with galas and such, all part of the Craven Inc. image. I haven’t been able to fill him in on what I thought happened. He makes me smile, though. He’s been going solo, which, of course, has created hype with the press. They’ve been having a field day speculating if the infamous Mr Craven is now an eternal bachelor or if he has found the future Mrs Craven.Of course, Luke hasn’t helped the matter one bit. He told the reporter at one gala. “I have a beautiful young woman waiting for me at home and I’m not ready to share her with the rest of the world just yet.” with a fucking wink!With just that one statement last night, JJ said, “The paps have been buzzing. We will have to send out a decoy if you are both se
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Mum goes inside to check on the feast she’s cooking for us tonight. I lean against the gate and watch Benny do his crazy yard zoomies. This big pupper always makes me smile when I least feel like it. Especially while thinking about Dean fucking Bertrand.What can I do? JJ is helping me with Security, but should I call the police? Did I really see him that night at the bar? Did I really see him at home in my underground garage?Only moments ago, I felt sure, now I wonder if it was just all in my head. I mean why the hell would Dean hang around here for me. If I broke out of prison I would be long gone into the next state, not stalking my ex.I shake my head as if he is here for you Lillian Blackwood. Is your pussy made of gold? I snort.Benny continues his zoomies, only stopping to pick up an old tennis ball and race around the yard like a lunatic.“Hey Babe, what are you doing out here?” Luke calls as he jogs down th
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We stayed a couple of more days. I’m just about to get Lucy for breakfast when Abby comes charging into the house like she’s on a warpath.“Hey, Sis. I was just about to get Luce for breakfast.” I tell her as she storms up the stairs.“Ah huh, is she up yet? I need to get her to school.”“She is, but she hasn’t had breakfast. She’s been working on her assignment all night. Ease up on the kid.” I don’t know what’s up her arse this morning, but she can’t lay into the poor girl just cause she’s in a bad mood.“When you have kids, you’ll understand.” Abby snaps. She stops in her tracks and turns around with her hand over her mouth. “Oh, my god. Lily, I’m so sorry.” She runs down the stairs and hugs me tightly.I laugh. “Abby, calm down. I don’t know what’s going on with you, but you really need to relax.”“I wasn’t thinking when I said that. I’m so sorry.”I sigh inwardly. This happens a lot with Abby. “Listen, I’m okay with it. I’ve accepted that I won’t be able to have my own children.
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Well, that was different. I turn to Luke, who’s staring into space.“You alright?” I ask, knowing it’s a stupid question to ask. But what else can I say? I mean to hear me speak so frankly about my past and being so indifferent to it….“Why didn’t you tell me?” he asks, searching my eyes.“Talking about my past is a bit of a mood killer.” I smirk, his eyes harden. “What do you want me to say? That I’m sorry I haven’t told you everything? I still haven’t told my therapist everything, let alone anyone else.”“No, no… I-I just want to know” he puts his hands on his knees rubbing his legs in frustration.“It happened, Luke. There’s nothing I can do to change that. No matter how many times I wished for it, prayed for it.” I look up at the ceiling, willing the tears to go away. “I choose when and who I tell. There are two people in this world that know all of it and that’s Dean and me. Of course, my therapist knows more than anyone else, including my mother. Talking about this, reliving it
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I smile at my reflection. Yes, you are a lucky bitch. I finish the last touches of my makeup and check my outfit to make sure it’s all in the right place. I’m wearing a white sleeveless fitted scoop neck top with a mini black leather corset, tight black jeans, a black leather jacket and black heels. “Oh!” I pick up my new platinum gold necklace with a key and heart charms on it. Luke said he commissioned the necklace from his brothers a week ago and here it is all the way from Dubai.“Yeah, you are one lucky bitch.” I murmur to myself as I knock on the door to my study again. This time I don’t hesitate. I walk right on in. Luke looks me up and down and whistles.“Wow, you look hot. Maybe I should put this aside for later.” He smiles playfully, “I can’t let you go out looking like that!”“What are you going to do? Tie me up?” I tease.“Maybe I will” He stalks towards me, his eyes glowing darkly. The look makes me shiver in an oh so good way. He wraps me in his arms and kisses me zealou
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It’s been a couple of days since my panic attack. Lucas has respected my wishes and hasn’t contacted me at all. Which stupidly doesn’t make me feel any better.Why hasn’t he called to make sure I’m alright? I thought he loved me!I roll my eyes. Damned if you do, damned if you don’t. I’m sure I would have told him off if he called me yesterday. But today, I guess I expected at least a ‘Good Morning’ text or something.I sigh. I should really get up and out of bed today.Yesterday I spent all day in my PJ’s wallowing. I need to get out and get some fresh air.I decide to take Benny on our usual walk when I have a free day. We haven’t done this in a while. We go to our café; Benny has his Pupa-chino, a small cup full of cream, and a mini vanilla cupcake. Then we do Benny’s favourite part of our little day out, playing with his mates.Benny had a blast playing with his doggy friends in the off leash fenced off dog park. Once he’s had his fill, we sit under our favourite oak tree. Benny l
Last Updated : 2024-10-29
Latest chapter
Lillian Blackwood Epilogue
I watch the woman my brothers tell me I loved. The One. That’s what my journal tells me. Lillian Blackwood is my one. The problem is I can’t remember her. Not a single thing. All the descriptions I wrote about her don’t do her justice. Even while I watch her breakdown. While I watch my brother comforts her, over a dog named Benny. She’s still incredibly beautiful. “Are you willing to let that go?” Dylan asks as he watches the commotion in front of us. “I can’t let go of something I didn’t know I had.” I shrug and walk outside. The house is beautiful. I’m told it’s her mother’s or was. “You need to think about this.” Dylan pulls the ring from his pocket. “You commissioned this piece, Lucas. That’s how serious you are,” he shakes his head, “Were about Lily. She’s a wonderful woman, and she is going through a lot right now. Decide.” He storms off back inside. I take in the view of this beautiful piece of land. It’s just as I described in my journal. Decisions…. Stay or leave?
Lillian Blackwood Chapter 39
After returning from another MRI scan and more blood tests. I visit Luke. JJ is sitting in the corner talking on the phone. I wave to him and sit by Luke’s bed, squeezing his hand gently. “I was just on the phone with Dylan. He and Declan are on their way here. They’re currently in Singapore for the layover.” He tells me. “Okay.” it’s not the best setting to meet Luke’s family, but I do hope that he wakes before they get here. They should come home to some good news. I smile at JJ. “Any news?” “Yes, they’re taking him out of his coma tomorrow.” He grins. “That’s wonderful news.” I gaze down at Luke. I can’t wait for him to wake up. “Yes, it is. I’m very sorry about your Mum. Esther, she was a real sweetheart.” I frown, “You know Lily, it isn’t your fault. Dean and Mel are their own people. They did this.” “Thanks, JJ, I know, it’s not my fault,” I sigh. “Well, the rational part of my brain knows it, but I still can’t help feeling guilty. It’ll take a while; I guess.” I shrug
Lillian Blackwood Chapter 38
“Hi, baby.” Luke smiles sweetly, stroking my face, his other hand playing with my hair.“Hi, I think I had another bad dream, and you were in it this time. Dean shot you.” I tell him, staring into those beautiful hazel eyes. He frowns.“It was a dream, wasn’t it?” I ask, as his frown deepens.“No baby, not a dream.” He smiles lovingly. “Will you sing me that lullaby song?”“Always.” I sing the song as he holds me tightly and says, “I love you, baby.”I blink up at an unfamiliar ceiling. Jesus, I must have been on a hell of a boozy night out. I look around the room. It’s all off-white, except for the curtains, they’re grey. Definitely not at home. Did Luke take me to his place? He needs a new decorator. Who has a mini-fridge in a bedroom?“Luke?” I whisper, my voice dry and horse. I try to turn but the pain is excruciating, my back, and chest ache like nothing I’ve ever felt before. My head, I touch my head, fuck, it hurts. Someone yells.“Lily!” it’s Abby. Good god, did she need to sc
Lillian Blackwood Chapter 37
I swallow hard. My throat feels both dry and full of saliva at the same time. What the fuck happened?Slowly, I open my eyes. I try to bring my hands up to rub my eyes, but my hands won’t budge. I blink slowly and look around. It’s dark, but there is some sort of light coming in, God knows where. How did I get here?I try to move my hands, but they’re pinned to my side. I look down, but I still can’t see shit. I think I’m sitting.Fuck my head! I shake my head, but it only makes the throbbing worse.Something scatters across the room, making me jump. I whip my head in the general direction, but I can’t see shit. The adrenalin spikes which help’s clear the drug haze a little.That’s when it clicks. Fucking Dean. And Mel?!Motherfucker jabbed my neck with a motherfucking needle. Fuck! Fuck! Fuck! I try to say the words out loud, but of course, the arsehole has taped my damn mouth. I creak my neck, something’s covering my eyes. No wonder I can’t see. The bastard blindfolded me.I try to
Lillian Blackwood Chapter 36
Luke is stroking my hair. I smile sleepily. “You look so beautiful and peaceful when you sleep,” he smiles.“I do?” I can’t remember the last time I felt any kind of peace whilst sleeping unless Luke’s here.“Yes, you do.” He kisses me.“I think you should stay here more often.” I grin seductively.He laughs. “I bet you do; Are you asking me to move in with you?”“I think I am. You stay often enough. But I can’t imagine you would like to stay in a place so small.”“I like your place. It’s much cozier than mine. Hmm, I should take you to my place.” He gets up out of bed. “Would you like me to make you something or get you a drink?”“Yes, please. A juice, surprise me.” I get up and put on my robe. “I need to make a few calls and I’ll be right out.”I call Mum, no answer, I leave her a voicemail, letting her know we’re still safe and making sure she’s okay.I call Mel, but again no answer, I don’t bother with a voicemail. I’ve left enough.I call Stacie, knowing she’s in school and may n
Lillian Blackwood Chapter 35
Another terrifying scream breaks the silence. What–the–fuck!We jump out of bed, scrambling to put on clothes as we race downstairs. I hear movement coming from the kitchen and bolt. Luke close behind me.Mum is holding onto the bench in the kitchen, clutching her chest.“Mum?” I yell.“S-someone’s out-outside!” she says breathlessly.Luke and JJ race to the back door. Shit! Dean! Daniel’s immediately calling the police.“Come sit down. Are you alright, mum?” I move her to the dining room table and sit her down gently on one of the dining chairs.“I’m alright, Darling. I wasn’t expecting to see someone outside, that’s all.” She coughs while trying to catch her breath.“Who screamed?” Stacie asks wide-eyed.“Mum, she saw someone through the kitchen window. Luke and JJ are outside. Can you look after Mum?”I don’t wait for an answer. I race upstairs, throw on a pair of sneakers and grab Benny. Like most teenagers, Lucy has slept through the whole commotion.“Come on Benny, let’s find th
Lillian Blackwood Chapter 34
I wake feeling blissfully happy, wrapped in Luke’s strong, comforting arms. He tightens his arms around me as I cuddle deeper. I look up at his smiling, sleepy face.“Good morning, beautiful.” He says as he kisses the top of my head.“Good morning.” I don’t think this smile will ever leave my face; my cheeks are hurting.“That was quite an evening. How are you?” I ask warily.“I’m fine. I was actually wondering how you are?” His eyes glow affectionately.“I’m good. I’m sorry about last night.” He presses his finger against my lips to quieten me.“Don’t be.”“Reset?” I ask.“We already did last night.” He winks at me.“Aren’t we cheeky this morning?”“We are.” He winks and leans down to kiss me. “I love you so much, Lillian Blackwood.”“I love you too,” I tell him after our kiss ends. I hold on to him tighter, never wanting to let go, or move, for that matter. But then Benny barks.“That’s ‘I’m hungry’ in dog language.” I glance at the clock. 7:30 am. Yep, breakfast time.I quickly get
Lillian Blackwood Chapter 33
It’s been a couple of days since my panic attack. Lucas has respected my wishes and hasn’t contacted me at all. Which stupidly doesn’t make me feel any better.Why hasn’t he called to make sure I’m alright? I thought he loved me!I roll my eyes. Damned if you do, damned if you don’t. I’m sure I would have told him off if he called me yesterday. But today, I guess I expected at least a ‘Good Morning’ text or something.I sigh. I should really get up and out of bed today.Yesterday I spent all day in my PJ’s wallowing. I need to get out and get some fresh air.I decide to take Benny on our usual walk when I have a free day. We haven’t done this in a while. We go to our café; Benny has his Pupa-chino, a small cup full of cream, and a mini vanilla cupcake. Then we do Benny’s favourite part of our little day out, playing with his mates.Benny had a blast playing with his doggy friends in the off leash fenced off dog park. Once he’s had his fill, we sit under our favourite oak tree. Benny l
Lillian Blackwood Chapter 32
I smile at my reflection. Yes, you are a lucky bitch. I finish the last touches of my makeup and check my outfit to make sure it’s all in the right place. I’m wearing a white sleeveless fitted scoop neck top with a mini black leather corset, tight black jeans, a black leather jacket and black heels. “Oh!” I pick up my new platinum gold necklace with a key and heart charms on it. Luke said he commissioned the necklace from his brothers a week ago and here it is all the way from Dubai.“Yeah, you are one lucky bitch.” I murmur to myself as I knock on the door to my study again. This time I don’t hesitate. I walk right on in. Luke looks me up and down and whistles.“Wow, you look hot. Maybe I should put this aside for later.” He smiles playfully, “I can’t let you go out looking like that!”“What are you going to do? Tie me up?” I tease.“Maybe I will” He stalks towards me, his eyes glowing darkly. The look makes me shiver in an oh so good way. He wraps me in his arms and kisses me zealou
