LEOSENIOR YEARAPRILI hadn't had a hangover like this for a long, long time. My head was pounding, and my mouth was like a roll of cotton. For a long disoriented moment, I couldn't remember where I was or why I was awake. One hand groped out, reaching for Quinn, before my traitorous mind remembered the truth. She's not in your bed. She hasn't been in your bed for over a year. And she's fucking marrying someone else.The pain stabbed again, just as sharp and fresh as it had the first time I'd heard the news. Quinn had made sure it came from her, and she'd actually called me, explaining what was going on. I'd run through the gamut of emotion from grief over Nate's news to anger over what he was asking of Quinn to hurt over the fact that she'd agreed. Quinn was engaged to Nate. They were getting married in two months. I didn't have to do much mental arithmetic, because the countdown ticked away in my brain on a daily basis. On the bedside table next to me, my phone sounded, an
LEOMatt Lampert had never been much of a planner, but he'd managed his suicide with a precision that would've changed his life, had he applied it there. He'd cleaned his room, as I'd noticed, and when I opened his closet, I'd found his clothes bagged. In his duffel bag were all the personal items that might mean something to me, to his grandparents and to Gia.At the motel room where he'd ended his life, the police had found only two notes. The first was the one Coach had referenced, a polite missive requesting that the authorities notify Coach Demby, who would then know how to proceed. The second note was a piece of paper with Gia's name written on top, and it had only two words on it. I'm sorry.The coach had offered to help me with anything I needed, but I tried to do everything myself. I owed that much to Matt. I called his grandparents and broke the news, and with their guidance, I made arrangements for Matt's body to be cremated locally. And then I brought him home. M
NATESUMMER AFTER GRADUATIONMy wedding day dawned clear and warm. I was awake as the sun rose over the ocean, sitting up in bed to watch the colors spread over the blue water and shoot rays of gold onto the sand. Today was the happiest day of my life, and I wasn't going to miss a single minute of it. My mother had worried that having both graduation and the wedding in the same week would be too much for me, but I knew that nothing was going to stand in the way of me marrying Quinn. I briefly considered not walking at that ceremony, just sitting in the audience to cheer for Quinn, Gia, Tuck and Zelda, but it was important to my parents that I walked onto the stage to receive my diploma. I wanted to give them every memory I could, because I knew they were going to need those someday soon.We'd driven down to the shore the day after graduation, and I'd settled into the same bedroom where I always slept. Quinn popped in now and then, bringing me updates about how preparations were pr
NATEAt high noon on the Saturday after we'd graduated from college, I saw my every dream come true when I married Quinn Russell.The ceremony was brief but filled with meaning. I hardly heard a word of it, because I couldn't take my eyes off my beautiful bride. Quinn wore a short light pink sundress, with flowers in her hair. Her eyes were clear and steady, and when the minister pronounced us man and wife, she kissed me with warmth. We celebrated afterwards with barbecued chicken and a variety of cold summer salads, because those were my favorites. Carrie had made a cake, and Quinn and I sliced it together before we fed each other the first bite.My father lifted a glass of champagne and made a toast, and we all got tears in our eyes when he mentioned Bill, and how much we missed him. It made me wonder if Quinn would have married me, if her father were still alive; would Bill have understood? Or would he have talked her out of it?And then it was my turn to speak. "I told my d
LEO"Don't you think you've had enough?" Eli Tucker, one-time star receiver for Gatbury High's football team, a guy I'd once loved to watch play the game, looked up at me from his wheelchair. In his eyes, I saw compassion, sympathy and understanding.I fucking hated that. "No, as a matter of fact, I don't." I slammed back the rest of my boilermaker and signaled to the bartender. "And I'm pretty sure I just met you yesterday, dude. Which means you're not even a little qualified to tell me what to do.""I've known you for two years. Does that give me the right to say you need to slow down?" Standing next to the wheelchair, one hand resting on its back, Zelda cocked her head at me. Her blonde hair was twisted up, exposing the slim column of her neck, and I thought distractedly that this chick was extremely fuckable. Maybe she'd be just what I needed to take my mind off my problems. Maybe she could do what this booze wasn't and make me forget Quinn. I was about to open my mouth to
LEO"Excuse me. Aren't you Leo Taylor?"I gritted my teeth and just barely kept from rolling my eyes. I wanted to turn to the blonde standing just behind my bar stool and tell her to leave me the fuck alone, but I knew that wouldn't fly with the PR suits at the Richmond Rebels, the team that had drafted me with their number three pick back in April.So instead, I stretched my lips into a parody of a smile and nodded, shifting a little so I could face the chick who was checking me out. "Yes, I am." I stuck out a hand. "Nice to meet you."She laughed and shook her head, ignoring my hand. "You don't remember me. Well, it's been a long time. I'm Dana Jenkins. Sarah's little sister?"It took me a minute before I placed her. The mischievous brown eyes, the pert, upturned nose-she'd been the annoying little kid who'd tried to spy on Sarah and me when we'd dated in junior high and then again in high school. "Holy shit." I stood up and wrapped her in a hug. "I haven't seen you in-well,
QUINN"...and then this set, he takes an hour after lunch. I wrote 1 PM on the box, but you need to make sure if he eats a little later or earlier, he gets the pills exactly one hour later. If it's any earlier, they can cause stomach upset, but if it's any later, it can interfere with his later meds." Sheri shook the plastic medicine box. "Quinn, did you understand that? Do you hear me?"I jerked my attention back to Nate's mom, who was frowning at me across the coffee table. In front of her lay the tray of medicines, organized into smaller containers, each labeled with a day of the week, and next to that was a manila folder full of notes about the prescriptions as well as other aspects of Nate's care. "Yes." I struggled to keep my eyes open and my voice clear. "One PM. After lunch. The blue box. Got it.""No, not the blue box. The clear box. The blue box is for before breakfast. Remember? B stands for before breakfast." Sheri was frustrated, and she wasn't trying to hide it in he
QUINNThe silence in my car was absolutely blissful. I drove slowly down the side roads of my hometown, smiling as I saw the red, white and blue bunting on some of the houses. Eatonboro had the best Fourth of July parade, and I'd missed it the last three years. It made me sad; the last time I'd sat curbside watching the floats, the antique cars and the endless local marching bands, it had been mere weeks after my father had died. I'd been with Leo and Nate that day, I recalled. Leo had carried two lawn chairs from my house to the edge of the parade route, five blocks away. After he'd set them up, Nate had taken one, and Leo and I shared the other, with me nestled between his muscled thighs. Leo's arms had been wrapped around me as I'd leaned back against his chest, feeling safe and protected-and just so right. With a sigh, I forced myself to pay attention to where I was going. There was a grocery store only about five minutes from Nate's house, and I was pretty sure I could get ever