Gwyneth
Two years later “Dad!” I run down the stairs and toward the front door, my sneakers slapping on the marble with each step. At the sound of my voice, he stops and turns to me with a questioning gaze and a smile. There’s always a smile on Dad’s face whenever he looks at me. Even when he’s mad at me, he soon forgets it all and smiles. Our housekeeper, Martha, says I’m the only one who makes him smile from his heart. So I’m kind of proud of having the superpower of making the “savage devil,” as the media dubs him, smile only at me. But the media is a bunch of assholes, because they forget that he’s been such a devout single parent ever since he was young. My dad hasn’t aged much. At thirty-seven going on thirty-eight, he still has a strong build that fills out his suit. He’s tall and broad and has an eight-pack. No kidding. He’s the healthiest man I know. But he also has a few age lines that make him the wisest ever—aside from a certain someone. Also, the look in his blue-gray eyes, the same eyes that now look at me with love, can kill. I can tell why many people find him intimidating and absolutely brutal. When someone has his fortune, looks, and personality, people either bow or stay away. But once again, I have the superpower of being his only flesh and blood. “You forgot your phone.” I wave it in front of him and take a slurp of my vanilla milkshake—which is my version of a morning coffee. Dad sighs as he takes the phone. He’s not the type who forgets,ever—his memory is like an elephant’s, but it feels as if he’s been preoccupied more than usual lately. Maybe it’s an important case. Or his unending legal battles with my step-grandmother, Susan. I swear, neither of them will let go and it’ll just go on forever in court until one of them dies. After he tucks the phone in his pocket, he pinches my cheek. “What would I do without you, my little angel?” I pull back. “Hey! I’m not little anymore. We celebrated my twentieth birthday a month ago.” “You’ll always be little to me. Besides, a vanilla milkshake is still your favorite drink, which proves my theory.” “It’s my happy drink.” “Uh-huh.” “I’ve really grown up. See how tall I am?” “How tall or old you are doesn’t matter. You’ll always be little to me.” “Even when I’m old and wrinkly and taking care of you?” “Even then. Deal with it.” “You’re hopeless, Dad.” “Gwyneth Catherine Shaw, who are you calling hopeless?” I fix his crooked tie and feign sadness. “A certain Kingsley who’s getting old yet refuses to settle down with someone.” “I have my little angel and, therefore, I need no one else.” “I’ll leave one day, Dad.” “Not if I have a say in it.” “Are you going to keep me single forever?” “Hmm.” He stares at me thoughtfully, as if he’s trying to figure out the ending to humanity’s misery. “Hypothetically, no, because I want grandchildren—eventually. But I don’t like the journey that leads to that outcome.” “There could always be a surprise pregnancy.” Dad stiffens and I internally curse myself for not keeping my mouth shut. This, of all subjects, isn’t something he’s a fan of—because of my mother, I guess. He hid it from me until I was eight. Up until that time, he used to tell me that she’d died, but then I overheard him talking to Nate and that’s when he told me the sad reality. Ever since then, we made a pact to never lie to each other. “Are you pregnant?” His voice loses all humor. “What? No, of course not, Dad.” He grabs my shoulders and leans down so his eyes are level with mine. “Gwen, if you are, just tell me.” “No…” “Is it that kid with the bike? I’m going to fucking murder him.” “It’s not Chris. I was just kidding. I’m sorry.” “Are you sure? Because that motherfucker is going to have a surprise visit from me and his Grim Reaper.” “Don’t, Dad. I’m really not pregnant. I promise.” He releases a breath, then staggers backward as if he’s been punched. What I just said must have reminded him of how I ended up at his door. My mystery mother—who’s a taboo subject around here—abandoned me in front of Grandpa’s house when Dad was still in high school with a measly note that read “She’s yours, Kingsley. Do whatever you want with her.” And that’s how I came to life. Abandoned. Discarded. She didn’t even tell him to take care of me. Just “whatever he wanted.” “Don’t joke about things like that, Gwen,” Dad tells me in his no-nonsense voice. “I know. I didn’t mean to.” I grin up at him in an attempt to change the mood. “Aren’t you forgetting something else?” He places his briefcase on the floor and opens his arms. “Come here.” I dive in, wrapping my arms around him. “I love you, Dad.” “Love you, too, Angel. You’re the best gift I’ve ever received.” Moisture gathers in my lids and it takes everything in me not to be all emotional and tell him stupid things like how it hurts that I’m not Mom’s gift, too. That she considered me trash to be discarded. That she’s a coward who abandoned both of us. Because, in a way, I’ve always had a hunch that he was waiting for her. Twenty years later and he must be exhausted. He must be at his limit. Maybe I’m at my limit, too. Despite all Dad’s love, I’ve always felt that a piece of me was missing, lost somewhere I can never reach. That could be the reason I grew up to be a hollow person with barely anything at my core. Someone sweet on the outside, but completely and utterly empty on the inside. Someone with a dysfunctional brain. Someone who needs lists and coping mechanisms to stay afloat.“Did you change your shampoo, Gwen? It’s still vanilla, but is it a different brand?”I roll my eyes as I pull back. He has a super sensitive nose, like he can smell when I’ve had a drink behind his back, even after I brush my teeth and consume copious amounts of mouthwash.“I mixed two brands together. Seriously, Dad, you have a weird sense of smell.”“It’s for when my angel decides to drink when she’s not supposed to.”I make a face and Dad ruffles my hair, sending the auburn strands flying.“Not the hair!” I jerk away and smooth the stubborn thing down.“You still look beautiful.”“You’re only saying that because you’re my father.”“You got my genes, Angel, and that’s not something trivial. Anyone would find you beautiful.”Not Nate.A jolt rushes through me for just thinking his name. It takes all my resolve to say goodbye to Dad without turning a furious shade of red.After he leaves, I sit on the steps, place my milkshake beside me, and grab my bracelet. The one he gave me for m
KingsleyI use the voice command to call Nate.The sound of ringing fills the car, but there’s no answer.“Fuck.” I hit one of my fists against the steering wheel as I take a sharp turn to the right.I zigzag between cars, ignoring their honking and the occasional name-calling.Right now, I’m on a mission.One that will only be fulfilled once I’m at the firm and talking to that low-fucking-life.When I first saw the document this morning, I thought something was wrong. Surely, the name and the fucking proof that lay in front of me were some sort of a mistake.A miscalculation.A Coincidence.A fucking anomaly in the system.But it wasn’t.And neither were the facts that I learned from the private investigator. Neither were the records that I had to stoop low and call in favors to acquire.The truth was sitting squarely in front of me all this time, hiding in plain fucking sight and I was too blind to see it.Was it arrogance?Ignorance?After all, I’ve grown so fast in so little time.
GwynethThe glass of water slips from my hand and hits the sink with a loudcrash, splintering all over the surface.The sound collides with the climax of Car Radioby Twenty One Pilots that’s playing from Alexa.I wince while I carefully grab the tiny pieces and throw them in the trash and simultaneously scroll through my phone.Aside from the memes and mindless conversations in my group chat with my college friends, there’s nothing of importance. Though calling them friends is an exaggeration. Colleagues would be more appropriate.Chris, Jenny, Alex and I all take pre-law at the same college, so we kind of flocked toward each other. It’s hard for me to consider anyone an actual friend, because most of the people I’ve met since I was in elementary school were either interested in my super successful father or our family drama, namely the drama between Dad and my step-grandma. It got worse in pre-law since everyone is gunning to snatch an internship at Weaver & Shaw.The screening proce
Anyway, Chris and I still haven’t gone all the way and I don’t want to. I feel like if I do, I’ll be letting myself down or something. Not that he’s been pressuring me or anything, but he can’t be patient forever, no matter how much he enjoys the make-out and groping sessions.It isn’t right to lead him on, though, which is why I need to make a decision. Either end this or go all the way in.The main reason I said yes to Chris in the first place, aside from his negotiating skills, is because I needed to move on.I needed to find someone else to fill up the emptiness.There’s one tiny problem, though. I hadn’t thought that the previous occupier of that spot, Nate, would refuse to leave his place for someone else.But I’ve been pushing him out gradually. Soon, I’ll get completely rid of him and maybe someone who actually likes me, like Chris, will fill it.So I type with shaky hands.Me:Sure!Chris:Can I come to your house or will your father rearrange my features?I smile, remembering
NathanielA coma.The doctor is telling us that Kingsley is in a vegetative state. He’s saying things about swelling in the brain due to the impact and that he might wake up in the next few days, weeks, or never.This hotshot surgeon spent hours working on my friend with his people, and yet he still couldn’t bring him back.He was in the operating room for hours, just to tell us that King might or might not wake up. I don’t miss the fake sympathy or his attempts not to give hope.But even if I grab and shake him, then punch him in the face, it won’t bring King back, and it sure as fuck won’t serve any purpose. Except for maybe getting rid of some of my pent-up frustration.Gwyneth listens to the doctor’s words with her lips slightly parted. They’re lifeless and pale, like the rest of her face. She clinks the nails of her thumbs and forefingers together in a frantic, almost manic type of way. It’s a nervous habit she’s had since she was a kid—since she learned the truth about her mothe
“It’s not true. Tell me it’s not true, Nate.”I should reprimand her for not calling me Uncle like I usually do, but this is neither the time nor the place.“Denial won’t help you. The sooner you accept reality, the faster you can deal with it.”“No.” She grits her teeth, then lets out another haunted, “No…”“Let go, Gwyneth.” I try to soften my tone, as much as I’m able to, but it still comes out firm. Like an order.She shakes her head again, but it’s meek, weak, just like she is beneath my touch. Until now, I’ve never noticed how small she actually is compared to me.How fragile.Actually, I did once. When she was pressed up against me with her lips on mine.But I shouldn’t be thinking about that. I shouldn’t be thinking about how small my best friend’s daughter is or how she feels in my hold when we’re in front of his hospital room.A muscle clenches in my jaw and I loosen my hold on her shoulders, starting to step away from her.I’m unprepared for what she does, though.Completel
NathanielGwyneth falls asleep.After so much struggle and standing for hours in front of Kingsley’s room, she lost the physical battle and slumped over on one of the chairs in the waiting area.I told her that she could go home, but she vehemently shook her head, pulled her knees to her chest, and closed her eyes.Which is why she’s about to fall forward.I place a finger on her forehead and push her back so she doesn’t hit the ground. It’s light contact, only a damn finger, and yet it feels as if my skin has caught fire and the flames are now extending to the rest of my body.In hindsight, I shouldn’t have let her hug me. Or I should’ve pushed her away sooner. Because now, even a mere touch brings back memories of her body pressed up against my chest.Her slender body that I can’t stop thinking about how small it is compared to mine.I clench my fist and close my eyes to chase away the haze. It doesn’t work. Because even though she’s out of view, her scent clings to me as stubbornly
“We’ll represent Gwyneth and keep things as they are.”“Even if you personally take the case, there’s no way Susan will come out of this empty-handed. Gwyneth can’t touch her inheritance or trust fund until she’s twenty-one. That’s a whole year for Susan to demand the house and shares of the firm. She’ll have a leg to stand on, too, since Kingsley made his father’s will null and void. Because he used his father’s money for Weaver & Shaw’s capital, she can sue for her husband’s shares that Kingsley inherited. Not to mention that she’ll be up against a girl who can’t touch her money yet. And before you suggest it, yes, we can stall in court, but considering all of Susan and Kingsley’s legal battles in the past, I say Gwyneth doesn’t stand a chance. She doesn’t have her father’s legal experience, revenge spirit, or ruthlessness. She’ll be eaten alive by Susan.”I want to disagree, but I can’t. Aspen is right. Kingsley’s lawsuits against Susan were fueled by pure spite. He hated her and w
“Oh my God, Chris! Why didn’t you tell me?”“I just did.” He grins in that charming, lighthearted way and I’m so happy for that. I’m happy that I didn’t hurt him to the point of taking away his beautiful smile.“I’m so glad we get to spend time together.”“I thought you’d be all over getting rid of me.”.“Of course not! We can be friends, right?”He clinks his iced coffee against my drink. “Sure thing.”We fall into an easy conversation, which isn’t anything new. Chris and I have always gotten along, which is why he asked me out, saying he wanted to take it to the next level. That obviously didn’t work, so I’m thankful that we can still have a friendly relationship.We talk about college and exams and where our colleagues are doing their internships. He tells me about the interviewing process at W&S and how hard it was, but he passed because he impressed them and he’s a genius.It’s great to know that I won’t be a lonely face in the midst of all the hostile interns. With Chris around,
Gwyneth“Are you listening, Gwen?”I slide my attention from my assaulted vanilla milkshake that I’ve been jamming the straw in and out of to Chris, who’s staring at me with a furrowed brow.He came to pick me up earlier and we’ve been sitting in a coffee shop and talking. Well, he’s ended up doing all the talking while I’ve been thinking about other things.Like what was Nate doing with Aspen the entire afternoon?For hours.Alone.She didn’t even leave in her car.Logically, I shouldn’t be this affected, because I have no hold on him, right? Except maybe I do. After all, there’s a marriage certificate that says he’s married to me, and it should go without saying that he doesn’t leave with a woman who isn’t me.It’s only on paper. The marriage isn’t real.“Are you still upset about your dad?” Chris tries again.He’s such a gentleman. Like the best ever, and he’s hot, too, with his leather jacket, medium-length hair, and his pouty lips that are good at kissing.But I don’t think kissi
“I don’t need you to stand up for me.”“Sorry, but I can’t stay quiet when things like that happen.”“If you keep it up, you’ll end up getting hurt one day.”“One day isn’t today.” I stand and twist my neck, then move my legs to get the blood circulating to my toes. “Let’s go get lunch.”She opens a drawer and retrieves one of those sandwiches you get from the convenience store. “I have my lunch right here.”“That’s not called lunch. Let’s get a real one.” I reach for it and she catches my hand so fast, I flinch.“Don’t touch my computer.”“I was going for the sandwich.”Her hold slowly eases from around my wrist. I massage the skin as it quickly turns red.“Wow, you guys are super possessive of your computers, huh?”She pushes her glasses back with the heel of her palm. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to hurt you.”“It’s fine.” I grin, even though it does really hurt. It’s as if she’s a trained ninja. “Lunch?”She pushes the button on her screen, making it go black, and begrudgingly stands
GwynethBehave or you’ll pay.Behave. Or. You. Will. Pay.He can’t say things like that and then walk away—or more like kick me out—because I have questions. Lots of them. How am I going to pay? Why? Where? When?So many questions.Like everything when it comes to Nate, I guess. And I don’t know why I want to pay, or maybe I do know. Because I’m a masochist, in a way, and masochists like pain, especially when it’s a result of something we’ve done.I think that’s why I kissed him back then, because my masochistic tendencies took hold of me and I couldn’t escape them. And God forbid I tell Dad about them, because what would I say? Dad, I think I have masochistic tendencies toward your friend and I’m unable to stop them. Yeah, I wouldn’t be able to look him in the eye again.Anyway, because of what Nate said, I’m unable to focus on the file. I read a few lines and then I go back to thinking about all the words he said to me.Baby girl.Behave.Pay.Oh, and truly fucked. That one is the m
Whoever said that is a fucking moron.Besides, either she’s with me or with someone else. And there’s no way in fuck I was going to let her be with Knox, Daniel, or even Sebastian.I’ve been hit by the same haze that took over me when Aspen told me that my “wife” brought cupcakes and was talking with the three fuckers. Logical thoughts were the last thing on my mind when I barged in there. I knew she didn’t like it when I refused the internship, but I didn’t think she’d show up and negotiate her way into one.Behind my back.I’m well aware of her half-jogging behind me as I march to my office, but I don’t look at her. I’m charged up enough as it is without being distracted by the sight of her.If I had enough decency, I would slow down and let her catch up, but that term doesn’t fucking exist in my dictionary.As soon as we’re inside, I shut the door, lean against it, and face her.Gwyneth stands in the middle of the office, catching her breath. But then she glares at me with her arms
NathanielMy workplace is sacred.After all, it’s where my ambition thrives. Where my plans are made and my strategies are conducted.This is where I come to focus and forget about the girl I leave behind and go back late so that I don’t see her. Only, she’s not a girl, is she?I want to call her that to stop my dick from having ideas, but she was never that—a girl. At least, not for some time.She’s a woman now. A grown-up fucking woman with legs that go for miles and a tiny waist that can almost fit in only one of my palms.And she’s currently in the place where I’m supposed to be focused, not sidetracked.Gwyneth is right here, at W&S, and while it’s not her first time, she doesn’t usually dress like she’s at a business meeting.And definitely not with these three fuckers—my nephew included. Kingsley made it his mission to keep her away from them and their whoring ways. So I’m just taking care of it on his behalf. Like I promised him.It’s definitely not because of how I want to ja
I keep a low profile as I head to where the three of them are sitting. They usually have these coffee breaks around this time, and Nate has his administrative meetings in the morning, which is why I came in now.Everything is calculated to give my plan further chance to succeed. I’m taking things into my own hands and it’s all going to be fine.“Hi!” I say too cheerfully, making three pairs of eyes slide to me. Sebastian smiles and so does Daniel. He has a charming presence that’s similar to Sebastian’s when he was in college—Nate’s nephew is a bit more serious now.Daniel is pretty in a model type of way with his piercing turquoise eyes, light hair, and fit physique. It’s one of the reasons why magazines love putting him on their covers. That and his shrewd ways in the law circuit. “Gwen! Did you bring us some of your cupcakes?”“Yeah.” I grin, waving my bribes box. “I stayed up all night making them.”“You’re a doll.” Daniel takes the box, opens it, but pauses before eating. “Sorry
GwynethTwo weeks later, I’m forced back to reality.I’m forced to let go of the hope I held on to so tightly when Dad had his accident. Because the truth is, he’s not waking up and probably won’t. The doctor said that the more time he spends in a coma, the slimmer his chances are of coming out of it.And even though I’ve been visiting him every day, I can feel the gloomy cloud that hovers over his hospital bed. I can tell that my dad is probably not there anymore, no matter how much I talk to him and read to him and everything in between.And that’s just been too painful to think about, so I distracted myself with school before the summer break. And cleaning. I do that a lot when I’m anxious or stressed. I scrub floors and counters and dishes and the bathroom.In my head, I’m scrubbing my mind clean. Does it work? For a while, maybe, but not in the long term. Because the problems far outweigh the solutions. I thought myself strong enough to take it all—let it soak in and then vanish—
NathanielWhen my father said that I have a train brain, it had absolutely nothing to do with how much I actually love trains.My train brain doesn’t reverse. Ever. Once it’s moving forward, it just keeps going. There are no regrets. No going back and definitely no retracting what I fucking said or did.So now, I have a train life, one that’s only focused on getting shit done and moving on to the next thing, then the one after that, and so on. That’s how my train brain works.Forward.Outward.Nothing is kept inward. Otherwise, it’ll rot and cause my downfall.Now is no different. The present and the past are only a step for the future. A stop, a station. They’re not what I should be focused on and I certainly shouldn’t be thinking about her fucking words. The words that she shouldn’t have said in that sultry voice that I want to hear say fucked-up things.I don’t want safe and boring.That’s what started it all. That’s what brought us to this moment where she’s staring at me as if I’