“Hey, bitch, are you okay? Kanina ka pa tahimik? Sabi ko sayo diba, sumama ka sakin, wag ka na magtampo tanga.”
Hindi pa rin ako nagsalita, hindi kayang i-absorb ng utak at katawan ko ang nakita ko, I did not made a scene, hindi ako nag iskandalo gaya ng mga dapat na ginawa ko.
Ayos lang sana kung kilala ko, or nagsabi sya, or hindi sya nagsinungaling, pero lahat yon ginawa nya, sakin. Hindi ako naniniwala sa lahat ng naririnig ko, dahil wala naman silang ibedensya, sabi sabi lang yon, at hindi ako naniniwala lang sa ganon. I love and trust Aiden.
“Hoy!” sigaw ni Yana, “Okay ka lang?”
Tumango lang ako, “Yamers uwi na tayo, sakit talaga ng ulo ko.” Dahilan ko na lang, kahit sa totoo na lang, gusto ko na talaga pumalahaw ng iyak, how could he fucking do this to me, how could he fucking cheat on me?
How could he do this?
Sino yung babae na yon? Nabuntis nya ba yon? Sya ba tatay non? Pero ang laki na ng tyan nya. So he has been cheating on me for that long?
Hindi pwedeng sinamahan nya lang yon, putangina, they are holding each other’s hands and kissed on the lips, kilala ko ang buong pamilya nya, he can’t lie to me. I can’t contain my anger right now.
Hindi na ko tinanong ni Yana, she knew something was off with me, she’s not my best friend for fifteen years, for nothing. Alam nya na ayoko magsalita ngayon, and I thank her for always respcting the space I silently asked her.
Hindi ako dumiretso sa bahay, I went to the nearest bar and distracted myself, it good thing, I’m of legal age, that I can go to the bar by myself, how could this happen to me?
I should break up with him, right?
Wala sa loob na naibaba ko ang bason a hawak ko, I can’t, I can’t see my future without him anymore. We did a lot of things together, we already plan our future after college, where to buy a house, a car, properties, and even how many kids we wanted, but how come after all those plans, he still manages to think of cheating on me?
Hindi ko na napigilan ang sunod sunod na patak ng luha mula sa mga mata ko, mga heart is aching, I can still breath, yes, but my dying, it’s painful that I’m dying. How could the man I love cheat on me after all these years.
Naramdaman ko na may tumabi sa gilid ko, I didn’t budge though, wala akong pakielam, I just want to forget tonight.
“Yow, Lex.” I heard the wine mixer greet the man beside me. “Usual?”
“Oo, parang tanga, tatanong pa.” tumawa lang sila parehas, sana ganyan din ako kasaya ngayon, sana pala hindi na ko nagpunta sa mall kanina para hindi ko nakita, para hindi sana ko namamatay ngayon, “Hey, that’s a heavy one for a little girl.”
This freak, kaya pala masaya, babae ampotek. Lahat ba ng lalaki ganito na? ahh, peste, ano bang gagawin ko sa boyfriend ko na walanghiya? But I love him, ayoko sya pakawalan, pero ayoko din ng cheater! Dad didn’t cheat on my mom!
“Hey, little girl.” This time, mas malapit na sya sakin, at hinawakan na nya ang kamay ko, “Dami mo na naiinom ah, may kasama ka ba?”
Iwinaksi ko ang kamay nya na nakahawak sa akin, “Don’t touch me, asshole,”
“Aba, ikaw na nga inaalala dyan, mag aarte ka pa, little girl nan ga para sweet.”
“Tangina?” hindi ko alam kung mabubuwiset ako o matatawa.
“Ano ba kasi problema mo? Hindi ka nan ga maganda, roblemado ka pa.”
“Wala kang pakielam, okay? Manahimik ka dyan, at uminom ka na rin, tatakbo ka bas a pagkapresidente?”
Tumawa lang sya at inisang lagok ang martini na hawak nya, “Anon ga kasi? Para mabawasan yan, hind isa nakikielam ako, gusto ko lang makisawsaw sa buhay ng iba ngayon, nasa mood ako.”
Tinignan ko sya sandali, at umiling, well, he’s a stranger, there’s always a saying, na mas okay daw mag open up sa stranger, no judgement, I sigh, I don’t want someone to pity me, however, I’ll still say it.
“I have a boyfriend, for years, we planned everything, pero nahuli ko ang tarantado kanina, may kasamang babae,-“
“Baka naman kaibigan lang, to naman, mapaghinala.”
“We’ve been friends for years before we got into a relationship, I know his friends.”
“Okay, continue.”
“Buntis yung babae na ka-“
“Ah, baka naman, tita nya, ikaw naman talaga, sinasa-“
“Tanga, patapusin mo kasi ako.” Tumango tango lang sya, at nanngalumbaba sa harap ko, kaya inirapan ko sya.
“Okay, sakit mo magsalita ah, continue.”
“Marami na nagsabi sakin na niloloko nya ko, pero hindi ako naniwala, because I have nothing to be afraid of, nothing to be bothered, pero, tangina? Nakita ko mismo? Naghalikan pa sa harap ko? Buntis? Malaki tyan? So how long have he been cheating on me? Seriously?”
“Ay tangina? Eh ano ginawa mo? Sinabunutan mo? Sinuntok mo boypren mo?” para syang nanunuod ng movie at nasa climax na.
”Hindi! Syempre nagulat ako! Tsaka buntis yon! Paano kung may mangyari sa bata? Sige nga? Edi ako pa nalagot don?”
Tinignan nya ko mula ulo hanggang talampakan, “Sabagay, mukha kang harmful.”
I looked at him with disbelief, “Putangina?”
Tumawa nanaman sya, “Oh dali siz, ano pa chika?”
TANGINA, mamamatay ako sa lalaki na to, daming alam!
Fuck.I won’t ever think of drinking again; I woke up with the sun’s intense rays, my head throbbing, and I couldn’t understand what was happening.I tried to open my eyes; I was wasted; my god, when was the last time I got as wasted at this? Why did I even dr- memories flood seamlessly, like, it meant for me to remember.Tears started to flow from my eyes; my heart sank, and my throat felt dry like I had been stabbed with thousands of knives; memories from what happened yesterday were as fresh as my flowers, but they poisoned the happiness I planted and took care for I don’t know how many years.Jack, did he—did he cheat on me? Was I lied to? The Jack I loved for how many years, the man whom I thought would be my end game? Did he actually impregnate another woman, aside from me?I stood up, setting aside the heaviness of my heart; I won’t let them; Jack was mine from the very beginning; I can accept the child; we can even adopt that child if he really wanted to keep it; that’s how mu
Hindi ko alam kung ilang beses na ang buntong hininga na pinakawalan ko habang nakatingin sa bouquet na hawak ko, this are my favorite flower—tulips. I’m always happy when I see one, but not tonight.Tomorrow is our wedding, pero hindi pa rin siya tumatawag sa akin, I’m expecting him to cancel the wedding prior to the wedding, pero hindi ko alam kung bakit hanggang ngayon, ganito pa rin ang estado, na umaakto siya na akala mo, gusto niya talaga mag pakasal sa akin at wala siyang ginawang katarantaduhan.I was still holding the business card that Yana gave to me, I told her what happen, and she actually gave me this new business card containing the contact information of the company—obviously. Pero, sino ba naman ang tanga na gagamit nito.Napatigil ako sa pag iisip nang may kumatok sa pinto ko, narinig ko ang boses ni manag Salemn, “Nak, galing po dito si Aiden,” hindi ko alam, kahit nakakagago pakinggan, pero may kung anong tuwa sa dibdib ang naramdaman ko, bahagya akong napangiti da
“Congratulations on your big day, ma’am!” iyon ang bati sakin nang mga nasa loob ng room kung saan naka ready na ako dahil in 20 minutes ay mag sisimula na ang kasal.Kung hindi siguro nangyari ang lahat nang nangyari nang mga nakaraan, siguro abot abot na ang iyak at ngiti ko, pero hindi. Right now, I can feel my heart breaking into pieces, I can’t utter any words without breaking my voice.I felt my phone on my inner pocket vibrating. I immediately get it and saw that there is one message from unknown number.“Hello, this is hire me, group inc,” My heart beats so fast, “Your order with tracking number of 121615814916 has been delivered, we hope you enjoy your purchase. We will appreciate if you leave us a review, thank you!”“Ma’am,” may staff na pumasok, nakangiti sa akin, “Someone important might want to see you,” kumunot ang noo ko, pero maya maya ay parang may bumbilya na umilaw sa ulo ko.“Thanks,” I muttered, tumango naman siya at iniwan nang nakabukas ang pinto.As he stepped
Twelve hours before the weddingIn the stillness of the night, amidst the shattered fragments of my heart, I found myself begging, pleading for him to reconsider. “Please, Aiden,” I whispered into the darkness, my voice trembling with desperation. “I can forgive you. I can accept the child. Just please, don’t leave me.”But his resolve remained unyielding, his eyes filled with a sadness I couldn’t bear to see. “I can’t do that to you,” he said softly, his words a final blow to my already fractured spirit. “You deserve better than this. I won’t let you sacrifice your happiness for me.”With each rejection, a sense of resignation began to settle over me, a bitter acceptance of the reality that our love was no longer enough to bridge the chasm between us. And yet, even as I felt myself slipping further into the abyss of despair, a flicker of anger ignited within me.How dare he walk away from me, leaving me to pick up the pieces of my shattered dreams alone? How dare he think that he cou
The applause was thunderous. The sound seemed to reverberate in my head, each clap ringing louder than the last. I was walking down the aisle, and though I tried to steady my breathing, my chest felt tight. Lexus walked beside me, his arm lightly brushing against mine. He was tall, confident, and seemed entirely unfazed by the eyes on us. Meanwhile, my mind was spiraling, questioning every single decision that had led to this moment.“Now, let’s welcome the bride and the groom, let’s give them, a loud of applause!” Nanginginig ang panga ko, at hindi ko alam kung bakit ako kinakabahan. Sa idea ba na sa iba ako magpapakasal, o sa reaksyon nang mga makakakita sa amin? I could barely look at anyone as we walked down the aisle, my head low, my face hidden by the veil. My mind kept replaying everything that had led to this—everything I’d had to do to keep the truth from my family.The staff had handed the script to the emcee earlier, but as soon as she said Lexus’s name, she hesitated, a
“What’s the meaning of these, Thea? Nagulat na lang kami sa ginawa mo,”The day after the wedding, the weight of the secret I had been carrying for so long finally started to sink in. I had married Lexus, a man I barely knew, to save face and protect my family from scandal.But now, the shock was beginning to ripple outward. Aiden’s family, my own family—everyone was reeling, and it was only a matter of time before the truth came out. But there was no turning back now.We sat at my parents’ dining table, the quiet hum of tension hanging in the air. My family had gathered to discuss the events of the previous day, and it felt like the world was closing in on me. Parang sasabog ang puso ko sa kaba, but it’s now or never.“Astrea, we need to talk,” my father said, his voice unusually stern. He rarely spoke in that tone, but today was different. He wasn’t angry, but the concern was evident.I sat across from him, feeling the weight of everyone’s gaze. My mother was beside him, her hands f
The air in the living room was thick with tension. Aiden’s family had left earlier, still fuming over the events of the wedding, and now it was just my parents, Lexus, and me. The weight of the situation hung heavy over us, and I could feel my mother’s gaze on me, waiting for something—anything—resembling a solution.“Astrea,” my father began, his voice calm but firm, “we can’t just leave things hanging like this. You need to think about the future. Both of your futures.” He shot a look at Lexus, who was standing by the window, his arms crossed, his expression unreadable.“Your mother and I have discussed it,” my father continued, his tone softening. “We believe it’s best if you both stay here, at the estate, until things settle down. It will be easier, and we’ll be able to help with any… complications.”Tinignan ko si Lexus, his jaw clenched as he looked out at the garden. I could see the muscles in his back tense, the familiar signs that he wasn’t happy with what my father was sugge
I was packing my last few belongings into a duffel bag when I paused, staring at the half-empty room. The clothes were the easy part—sweaters, a few jeans, some shirts—but there were other things.Hindi ko na din naman kailangan mag dala masyado nang kung ano ano, iniwan ko na din ang mga uniforms ko, dahil hindi na required mag uniform these days, since graduating na ako.Things that seemed to weigh more than anything in that bag. I folded up the last sweater, tossed it in, and glanced over the room once more. The place had become so familiar over the past few weeks, but now it felt foreign, like I was about to leave behind a piece of myself.I sighed, zipping up the bag and dragging it over to the door. It had been a strange decision to pack up my life and come stay with Lexus. But when everything else felt like it was falling apart, where else was I supposed to go? At least this place was… different. Quirky, even.Grabbing my things, I stepped out into the hall, the floor creaking
One month after our wedding, I still couldn’t shake off the awkwardness that lingered between us. We followed the rules we set—business as usual. But there were moments, like when he’d bring me my coffee in the morning or when we’d share a quiet dinner, that I’d find myself wondering if there was more to this fake marriage than I’d originally thought.It was a Saturday afternoon when Lexus casually mentioned it. “Astrea,” he said, glancing up from his phone while I was sorting out some papers. “How about a proper date? You know, as a married couple.” His tone was light, but there was something about it that caught my attention.“A date?” I asked, pausing for a moment. “Are you serious?” It was one of those things I didn’t expect him to say. Our marriage was meant to be temporary, a mere formality, but here he was, suggesting a night out as though we were actually in a real relationship.He chuckled, seeing my reaction. “Yes, I’m serious. It’s been a month. We’ve been married for a whi
Dalawang buwan pa lang kaming kasal ni Lexus, at sa mga oras na iyon, maayos na ang takbo ng buhay namin. Ang kasunduan namin na magpanggap na mag-asawa ay hindi naging komplikado; we kept it simple. We stuck to the terms, walang masyadong drama, at ang mga tao sa paligid namin ay hindi talaga nakahalata na hindi kami ganoon ka-close.We went about our daily lives, doing things that married couples do, pero ang lahat ng iyon was just for show. We’d talk, share meals, and help each other when needed—pero deep down, alam ko na hindi ito yung klase ng relasyon na gusto ko.Pero it wasn’t so bad. Sa ilang pagkakataon, Lexus would step up and be there for me when I needed him the most. Parang ganun na lang kami—nagmumukhang mag-asawa, pero hindi kami ganun ka-intimate.One of the biggest milestones for me came when graduation day arrived. Laking tuwa ko nang makita siya, nakasuot ng simpleng outfit, ready to support me.“Hindi mo na ako kailangan gawing best dressed, Astrea, okay lang. Bas
The crowd’s cheers still echoed in my ears as I stood backstage, the weight of the performance slowly lifting from my shoulders. My final competition was over, and with it, one of the last hurdles before graduation. The adrenaline was starting to wear off, replaced by a strange mix of relief and emptiness.The backstage area was bustling with energy—other performers hugging, laughing, and snapping selfies. My classmates surrounded me, showering me with congratulations and kind words.“Ang sassy naman, Sis!” Clara, my teammate, exclaimed, practically bouncing on her heels. “That final pirouette was flawless!”I laughed, feeling a warmth spread through me despite my fatigue. “Thanks, Klang. Ang galing mo din dun kanina.”As the group buzzed around me, my eyes scanned the edges of the room. I told myself it was just a habit, looking for familiar faces, even though I knew exactly who I was hoping to see.And yet, he wasn’t supposed to be here. Lexus had made it clear he wouldn’t come.Pus
“Morning, Sunshine,” he teased, grabbing an apple from the counter, “Mukhang pangit gising natin teh, ah?”I sat at the dining table, the untouched cup of coffee in front of me slowly growing cold. My mind swirled with anticipation and nerves, the weight of the upcoming competition pressing against my chest. I needed to tell him.“Do you ever take anything seriously?” I asked, watching Lexus stroll into the kitchen like he didn’t have a care in the world.Lexus strolled into the room, a towel draped around his neck, his damp hair tousled from a shower. His usual easygoing demeanor felt both comforting and infuriating as I tried to muster the courage to bring up the topic.“Sure,” he said, biting into an apple with an exaggerated crunch. “Breakfast. It’s the most important meal of the day, nakakapangit ang pagpapalipas nang gutom,”I rolled my eyes, setting my coffee mug down with a little more force than necessary. “I’m serious, Lex. Can you stop joking for two seconds?”He leaned aga
Hannah lingered near the doorway, her initial shock giving way to a more composed demeanor. She pulled out her phone and scrolled for a moment before glancing at Lexus.“I came to discuss the updates on the upcoming photoshoot,” she said, her tone professional now, though her eyes still darted toward me occasionally. “There’ve been some changes to the campaign, and I need your input.”Lexus nodded, leaning casually against the door frame. “Ah ganon ba, we can talk. Sa office na lang tayo siguro.”I busied myself with clearing the plates, silently retreating to the kitchen. As their voices faded into the hallway, I focused on scrubbing the dishes, each clink of the plates against the sink filling the silence. My chest felt tight, though I couldn’t pinpoint why.Hannah’s presence wasn’t unexpected—Lexus had told me he worked with all kinds of people—but the way she had looked at me… like I was an anomaly. It stung more than I cared to admit.Once the dishes were done, I wiped down the c
The sound of rain tapping against the windows set the tone for another quiet evening. I had my laptop open on the kitchen counter, trying to finish an essay that was due in less than 12 hours. My focus was razor-sharp until I heard a guitar chord strum from the living room.It started soft, almost pleasant, but it quickly turned into a cacophony of random notes. I sighed, closing my eyes to keep from snapping.“Lexus,” I called out without looking up. “Could you maybe not do that right now?”“Ang alin ba?” His voice floated in, dripping with faux innocence.“Turn the living room into a bad open mic night.”“Wow,” he said, suddenly standing in the doorway, guitar slung across his shoulder like a modern bard. “Ang lakas mo yata mag joke ngayon, teh.”I glared at him. “I’m serious. I need to finish this.”“Lagi ka naman talaga seryoso sa buhay mo,” he quipped, walking into the kitchen and plucking a grape from the fruit bowl. “Ever heard of a work-life balance?”“Says the guy who edited
“Hoy, Bellatrix, panay tunog phone mo, gising na lahat bukod sayo!”“Shut up, will you!” I groaned and turned off my alarm.My phone buzzed, reminding me of deadlines, appointments, and everything else I had to juggle. I groaned and buried my face in my pillow, wishing for even just a few more minutes of sleep, but reality had other plans.Graduation was just around the corner, and I was struggling to finish my final competition prep. Not to mention the endless assignments, exams, and all the other distractions that kept piling up.I think Lexus had already left for his morning shoot, so I had the house to myself for a few hours. The quiet was both a blessing and a curse, leaving me alone with my thoughts and the endless list of things I had to do.I dragged myself out of bed and wandered into the kitchen, only to find Lexus, of course, already there, leaning against the counter with his usual casual air. He’d been up long before me, no doubt, his sleep schedule as chaotic as ever.“A
“Okay, tapos na,”I pulled the last of my clothes from the closet, folding them carefully into the suitcase, each motion deliberate as I tried to push away the frustration building inside me. Packing my things into this small, old suitcase felt almost symbolic. A life in a bag, ready to be uprooted once more.I glanced over at the unmade bed in the room I’d spent the night in—well, the room I’d been allowed to stay in. It wasn’t exactly home, but I’d done what I could to settle in, even if it was temporary.I tugged the suitcase closed, satisfied it was packed. The thought of leaving Lexus’s house hung over me like a cloud, but it was the only choice left. Things weren’t going to change. Not between us.As I stepped into the living room, dragging the suitcase behind me, I couldn’t help but notice how… empty it felt. The house, his house, was so quiet without the usual hum of his presence. Lexus had left early this morning, no doubt off on some photo shoot or project that demanded his
I was packing my last few belongings into a duffel bag when I paused, staring at the half-empty room. The clothes were the easy part—sweaters, a few jeans, some shirts—but there were other things.Hindi ko na din naman kailangan mag dala masyado nang kung ano ano, iniwan ko na din ang mga uniforms ko, dahil hindi na required mag uniform these days, since graduating na ako.Things that seemed to weigh more than anything in that bag. I folded up the last sweater, tossed it in, and glanced over the room once more. The place had become so familiar over the past few weeks, but now it felt foreign, like I was about to leave behind a piece of myself.I sighed, zipping up the bag and dragging it over to the door. It had been a strange decision to pack up my life and come stay with Lexus. But when everything else felt like it was falling apart, where else was I supposed to go? At least this place was… different. Quirky, even.Grabbing my things, I stepped out into the hall, the floor creaking