Hindi ko alam kung ilang beses na ang buntong hininga na pinakawalan ko habang nakatingin sa bouquet na hawak ko, this are my favorite flower—tulips. I’m always happy when I see one, but not tonight.
Tomorrow is our wedding, pero hindi pa rin siya tumatawag sa akin, I’m expecting him to cancel the wedding prior to the wedding, pero hindi ko alam kung bakit hanggang ngayon, ganito pa rin ang estado, na umaakto siya na akala mo, gusto niya talaga mag pakasal sa akin at wala siyang ginawang katarantaduhan.
I was still holding the business card that Yana gave to me, I told her what happen, and she actually gave me this new business card containing the contact information of the company—obviously. Pero, sino ba naman ang tanga na gagamit nito.
Napatigil ako sa pag iisip nang may kumatok sa pinto ko, narinig ko ang boses ni manag Salemn, “Nak, galing po dito si Aiden,” hindi ko alam, kahit nakakagago pakinggan, pero may kung anong tuwa sa dibdib ang naramdaman ko, bahagya akong napangiti dahil don.
“Okay po, nang, so where is he now? Paki sabi pumanik na lang dito sa kwarto—”
“Umalis din agad, mukhang nagmamadali, baka marami pa gagawin, hinabilin na lang niya na ibigay sayo ang mga ito,” sagot niya at inabot sakin ang bouquet of Blue Hyacinths, “Maiwan muna kita at nag luluto ako don,” sabi ni manang, tumango ako at lumabas na siya, narinig ko na isinara niya nang marahan ang pinto ko.
Para akong pinagbagsakan nang langit at lupa habang natitig sa bulaklak na hawak ko, nanlalamig ang kamay ko at nagbabadya ang mga luha sa mata ko, nanginginig ang kamay ko nang kinuha ko ang papel na nakaipit sa pagitan nang mga bulaklak.
Astrea,
I’m sorry, my conscience won’t let me sleep at night, knowing that this time, I have to hurt you, I love you, that I have to leave for good.
I know, you’re aware why, I’m sorry.
Aiden
So, he is aware that I knew it. Then, why would he do this on the night before the wedding? Why the fuck would he go to this extent, just to end up giving me this fucking letter? Huh, kusa nang nagsilaglagan ang mga luha sa mata ko, hindi ako makahinga sa sakit nang nararamdaman ko.
All these years, I loved him with all my heart, I treated our relationship as a dating for marriage, I never intended to play with him, I never cheated on him, I always make healthy and strict boundaries with other guys.
So, why?
Why would he fuck other woman, when I can be here? Is it because I can’t give it to him? Can’t he wait until we got married, I’ll be more than willing to give him everything, I was raised with the thought of valuing my purity. Am I not enough for him, am I not worth the wait?
Inabot ko ang cellphone ko na nakapatong sa night table ko at sinimulang tipahin ang mga numero na nasa maliit na papel na hawak ko.
Wala pang ilang segundo ay may sumagot agad—“Hello, this is Cain Johnson, how may I help you?” his voice sounds both mischievous and professional, “Oh—you called this special number, I assume you are in a fucked up situation?”
Ilang beses akong kumurap bago tuluyang sumagot, “Yeah, I need someone to save my face tomorrow, my groom runaway, leaving me in this embarrassment, my family is well-known, so yeah,”
“Hmm, I understand, so let me get this clear, Ms—”
“Astrea,” I muffled.
“Ms Astrea, you needed a rental groom for you wedding tomorrow, and what else? Do you need last minute changes?”
I nodded, even though he can’t see it, “Yeah, the invitations, it should be replaced with new ones, I can pay any amount, just please, let me breath tomorrow, let that whoever the man is, save my face on that fucking wedding day,”
I know, I sounded so desperate right now, but I don’t care, I fucking don’t care. I couldn’t careless, I just need to get through this wedding.
“Well, you called the right number, Ms. Astrea, all you have to do is to send the details of the wedding through the email on that business card, and then have a good night sleep, para hindi ka mukhang mangkukulam bukas,”
Napakunot ang noo ko, “Okay?”
“Okay, have a good night!”
Ilang minuto akong nakatulala sa kawalan, at doon ko ko lang din napagtanto na tapos na ang tawag.
I gritted my teeth, as I send the details of the wedding tomorrow, I never imagined that I must to go through like this, this is fucking absurd.
Tinignan ko ang kaisa isang litrato na natitira na magkasama kami ni Aiden, that’s my 18th birthday, walang pakundangan ko iyong kinuha at tinago sa drawer.
I’ll make sure, I’ll make sure that he will pay for it. You can’t embarrassed me and my family, you can’t do that.
I’ll bring this until in my grave.
“Congratulations on your big day, ma’am!” iyon ang bati sakin nang mga nasa loob ng room kung saan naka ready na ako dahil in 20 minutes ay mag sisimula na ang kasal.Kung hindi siguro nangyari ang lahat nang nangyari nang mga nakaraan, siguro abot abot na ang iyak at ngiti ko, pero hindi. Right now, I can feel my heart breaking into pieces, I can’t utter any words without breaking my voice.I felt my phone on my inner pocket vibrating. I immediately get it and saw that there is one message from unknown number.“Hello, this is hire me, group inc,” My heart beats so fast, “Your order with tracking number of 121615814916 has been delivered, we hope you enjoy your purchase. We will appreciate if you leave us a review, thank you!”“Ma’am,” may staff na pumasok, nakangiti sa akin, “Someone important might want to see you,” kumunot ang noo ko, pero maya maya ay parang may bumbilya na umilaw sa ulo ko.“Thanks,” I muttered, tumango naman siya at iniwan nang nakabukas ang pinto.As he stepped
Twelve hours before the weddingIn the stillness of the night, amidst the shattered fragments of my heart, I found myself begging, pleading for him to reconsider. “Please, Aiden,” I whispered into the darkness, my voice trembling with desperation. “I can forgive you. I can accept the child. Just please, don’t leave me.”But his resolve remained unyielding, his eyes filled with a sadness I couldn’t bear to see. “I can’t do that to you,” he said softly, his words a final blow to my already fractured spirit. “You deserve better than this. I won’t let you sacrifice your happiness for me.”With each rejection, a sense of resignation began to settle over me, a bitter acceptance of the reality that our love was no longer enough to bridge the chasm between us. And yet, even as I felt myself slipping further into the abyss of despair, a flicker of anger ignited within me.How dare he walk away from me, leaving me to pick up the pieces of my shattered dreams alone? How dare he think that he cou
The applause was thunderous. The sound seemed to reverberate in my head, each clap ringing louder than the last. I was walking down the aisle, and though I tried to steady my breathing, my chest felt tight. Lexus walked beside me, his arm lightly brushing against mine. He was tall, confident, and seemed entirely unfazed by the eyes on us. Meanwhile, my mind was spiraling, questioning every single decision that had led to this moment.“Now, let’s welcome the bride and the groom, let’s give them, a loud of applause!” Nanginginig ang panga ko, at hindi ko alam kung bakit ako kinakabahan. Sa idea ba na sa iba ako magpapakasal, o sa reaksyon nang mga makakakita sa amin? I could barely look at anyone as we walked down the aisle, my head low, my face hidden by the veil. My mind kept replaying everything that had led to this—everything I’d had to do to keep the truth from my family.The staff had handed the script to the emcee earlier, but as soon as she said Lexus’s name, she hesitated, a
“What’s the meaning of these, Thea? Nagulat na lang kami sa ginawa mo,”The day after the wedding, the weight of the secret I had been carrying for so long finally started to sink in. I had married Lexus, a man I barely knew, to save face and protect my family from scandal.But now, the shock was beginning to ripple outward. Aiden’s family, my own family—everyone was reeling, and it was only a matter of time before the truth came out. But there was no turning back now.We sat at my parents’ dining table, the quiet hum of tension hanging in the air. My family had gathered to discuss the events of the previous day, and it felt like the world was closing in on me. Parang sasabog ang puso ko sa kaba, but it’s now or never.“Astrea, we need to talk,” my father said, his voice unusually stern. He rarely spoke in that tone, but today was different. He wasn’t angry, but the concern was evident.I sat across from him, feeling the weight of everyone’s gaze. My mother was beside him, her hands f
The air in the living room was thick with tension. Aiden’s family had left earlier, still fuming over the events of the wedding, and now it was just my parents, Lexus, and me. The weight of the situation hung heavy over us, and I could feel my mother’s gaze on me, waiting for something—anything—resembling a solution.“Astrea,” my father began, his voice calm but firm, “we can’t just leave things hanging like this. You need to think about the future. Both of your futures.” He shot a look at Lexus, who was standing by the window, his arms crossed, his expression unreadable.“Your mother and I have discussed it,” my father continued, his tone softening. “We believe it’s best if you both stay here, at the estate, until things settle down. It will be easier, and we’ll be able to help with any… complications.”Tinignan ko si Lexus, his jaw clenched as he looked out at the garden. I could see the muscles in his back tense, the familiar signs that he wasn’t happy with what my father was sugge
I was packing my last few belongings into a duffel bag when I paused, staring at the half-empty room. The clothes were the easy part—sweaters, a few jeans, some shirts—but there were other things.Hindi ko na din naman kailangan mag dala masyado nang kung ano ano, iniwan ko na din ang mga uniforms ko, dahil hindi na required mag uniform these days, since graduating na ako.Things that seemed to weigh more than anything in that bag. I folded up the last sweater, tossed it in, and glanced over the room once more. The place had become so familiar over the past few weeks, but now it felt foreign, like I was about to leave behind a piece of myself.I sighed, zipping up the bag and dragging it over to the door. It had been a strange decision to pack up my life and come stay with Lexus. But when everything else felt like it was falling apart, where else was I supposed to go? At least this place was… different. Quirky, even.Grabbing my things, I stepped out into the hall, the floor creaking
“Okay, tapos na,”I pulled the last of my clothes from the closet, folding them carefully into the suitcase, each motion deliberate as I tried to push away the frustration building inside me. Packing my things into this small, old suitcase felt almost symbolic. A life in a bag, ready to be uprooted once more.I glanced over at the unmade bed in the room I’d spent the night in—well, the room I’d been allowed to stay in. It wasn’t exactly home, but I’d done what I could to settle in, even if it was temporary.I tugged the suitcase closed, satisfied it was packed. The thought of leaving Lexus’s house hung over me like a cloud, but it was the only choice left. Things weren’t going to change. Not between us.As I stepped into the living room, dragging the suitcase behind me, I couldn’t help but notice how… empty it felt. The house, his house, was so quiet without the usual hum of his presence. Lexus had left early this morning, no doubt off on some photo shoot or project that demanded his
“Hoy, Bellatrix, panay tunog phone mo, gising na lahat bukod sayo!”“Shut up, will you!” I groaned and turned off my alarm.My phone buzzed, reminding me of deadlines, appointments, and everything else I had to juggle. I groaned and buried my face in my pillow, wishing for even just a few more minutes of sleep, but reality had other plans.Graduation was just around the corner, and I was struggling to finish my final competition prep. Not to mention the endless assignments, exams, and all the other distractions that kept piling up.I think Lexus had already left for his morning shoot, so I had the house to myself for a few hours. The quiet was both a blessing and a curse, leaving me alone with my thoughts and the endless list of things I had to do.I dragged myself out of bed and wandered into the kitchen, only to find Lexus, of course, already there, leaning against the counter with his usual casual air. He’d been up long before me, no doubt, his sleep schedule as chaotic as ever.“A
“Morning, Sunshine,” he teased, grabbing an apple from the counter, “Mukhang pangit gising natin teh, ah?”I sat at the dining table, the untouched cup of coffee in front of me slowly growing cold. My mind swirled with anticipation and nerves, the weight of the upcoming competition pressing against my chest. I needed to tell him.“Do you ever take anything seriously?” I asked, watching Lexus stroll into the kitchen like he didn’t have a care in the world.Lexus strolled into the room, a towel draped around his neck, his damp hair tousled from a shower. His usual easygoing demeanor felt both comforting and infuriating as I tried to muster the courage to bring up the topic.“Sure,” he said, biting into an apple with an exaggerated crunch. “Breakfast. It’s the most important meal of the day, nakakapangit ang pagpapalipas nang gutom,”I rolled my eyes, setting my coffee mug down with a little more force than necessary. “I’m serious, Lex. Can you stop joking for two seconds?”He leaned aga
Hannah lingered near the doorway, her initial shock giving way to a more composed demeanor. She pulled out her phone and scrolled for a moment before glancing at Lexus.“I came to discuss the updates on the upcoming photoshoot,” she said, her tone professional now, though her eyes still darted toward me occasionally. “There’ve been some changes to the campaign, and I need your input.”Lexus nodded, leaning casually against the door frame. “Ah ganon ba, we can talk. Sa office na lang tayo siguro.”I busied myself with clearing the plates, silently retreating to the kitchen. As their voices faded into the hallway, I focused on scrubbing the dishes, each clink of the plates against the sink filling the silence. My chest felt tight, though I couldn’t pinpoint why.Hannah’s presence wasn’t unexpected—Lexus had told me he worked with all kinds of people—but the way she had looked at me… like I was an anomaly. It stung more than I cared to admit.Once the dishes were done, I wiped down the c
The sound of rain tapping against the windows set the tone for another quiet evening. I had my laptop open on the kitchen counter, trying to finish an essay that was due in less than 12 hours. My focus was razor-sharp until I heard a guitar chord strum from the living room.It started soft, almost pleasant, but it quickly turned into a cacophony of random notes. I sighed, closing my eyes to keep from snapping.“Lexus,” I called out without looking up. “Could you maybe not do that right now?”“Ang alin ba?” His voice floated in, dripping with faux innocence.“Turn the living room into a bad open mic night.”“Wow,” he said, suddenly standing in the doorway, guitar slung across his shoulder like a modern bard. “Ang lakas mo yata mag joke ngayon, teh.”I glared at him. “I’m serious. I need to finish this.”“Lagi ka naman talaga seryoso sa buhay mo,” he quipped, walking into the kitchen and plucking a grape from the fruit bowl. “Ever heard of a work-life balance?”“Says the guy who edited
“Hoy, Bellatrix, panay tunog phone mo, gising na lahat bukod sayo!”“Shut up, will you!” I groaned and turned off my alarm.My phone buzzed, reminding me of deadlines, appointments, and everything else I had to juggle. I groaned and buried my face in my pillow, wishing for even just a few more minutes of sleep, but reality had other plans.Graduation was just around the corner, and I was struggling to finish my final competition prep. Not to mention the endless assignments, exams, and all the other distractions that kept piling up.I think Lexus had already left for his morning shoot, so I had the house to myself for a few hours. The quiet was both a blessing and a curse, leaving me alone with my thoughts and the endless list of things I had to do.I dragged myself out of bed and wandered into the kitchen, only to find Lexus, of course, already there, leaning against the counter with his usual casual air. He’d been up long before me, no doubt, his sleep schedule as chaotic as ever.“A
“Okay, tapos na,”I pulled the last of my clothes from the closet, folding them carefully into the suitcase, each motion deliberate as I tried to push away the frustration building inside me. Packing my things into this small, old suitcase felt almost symbolic. A life in a bag, ready to be uprooted once more.I glanced over at the unmade bed in the room I’d spent the night in—well, the room I’d been allowed to stay in. It wasn’t exactly home, but I’d done what I could to settle in, even if it was temporary.I tugged the suitcase closed, satisfied it was packed. The thought of leaving Lexus’s house hung over me like a cloud, but it was the only choice left. Things weren’t going to change. Not between us.As I stepped into the living room, dragging the suitcase behind me, I couldn’t help but notice how… empty it felt. The house, his house, was so quiet without the usual hum of his presence. Lexus had left early this morning, no doubt off on some photo shoot or project that demanded his
I was packing my last few belongings into a duffel bag when I paused, staring at the half-empty room. The clothes were the easy part—sweaters, a few jeans, some shirts—but there were other things.Hindi ko na din naman kailangan mag dala masyado nang kung ano ano, iniwan ko na din ang mga uniforms ko, dahil hindi na required mag uniform these days, since graduating na ako.Things that seemed to weigh more than anything in that bag. I folded up the last sweater, tossed it in, and glanced over the room once more. The place had become so familiar over the past few weeks, but now it felt foreign, like I was about to leave behind a piece of myself.I sighed, zipping up the bag and dragging it over to the door. It had been a strange decision to pack up my life and come stay with Lexus. But when everything else felt like it was falling apart, where else was I supposed to go? At least this place was… different. Quirky, even.Grabbing my things, I stepped out into the hall, the floor creaking
The air in the living room was thick with tension. Aiden’s family had left earlier, still fuming over the events of the wedding, and now it was just my parents, Lexus, and me. The weight of the situation hung heavy over us, and I could feel my mother’s gaze on me, waiting for something—anything—resembling a solution.“Astrea,” my father began, his voice calm but firm, “we can’t just leave things hanging like this. You need to think about the future. Both of your futures.” He shot a look at Lexus, who was standing by the window, his arms crossed, his expression unreadable.“Your mother and I have discussed it,” my father continued, his tone softening. “We believe it’s best if you both stay here, at the estate, until things settle down. It will be easier, and we’ll be able to help with any… complications.”Tinignan ko si Lexus, his jaw clenched as he looked out at the garden. I could see the muscles in his back tense, the familiar signs that he wasn’t happy with what my father was sugge
“What’s the meaning of these, Thea? Nagulat na lang kami sa ginawa mo,”The day after the wedding, the weight of the secret I had been carrying for so long finally started to sink in. I had married Lexus, a man I barely knew, to save face and protect my family from scandal.But now, the shock was beginning to ripple outward. Aiden’s family, my own family—everyone was reeling, and it was only a matter of time before the truth came out. But there was no turning back now.We sat at my parents’ dining table, the quiet hum of tension hanging in the air. My family had gathered to discuss the events of the previous day, and it felt like the world was closing in on me. Parang sasabog ang puso ko sa kaba, but it’s now or never.“Astrea, we need to talk,” my father said, his voice unusually stern. He rarely spoke in that tone, but today was different. He wasn’t angry, but the concern was evident.I sat across from him, feeling the weight of everyone’s gaze. My mother was beside him, her hands f
The applause was thunderous. The sound seemed to reverberate in my head, each clap ringing louder than the last. I was walking down the aisle, and though I tried to steady my breathing, my chest felt tight. Lexus walked beside me, his arm lightly brushing against mine. He was tall, confident, and seemed entirely unfazed by the eyes on us. Meanwhile, my mind was spiraling, questioning every single decision that had led to this moment.“Now, let’s welcome the bride and the groom, let’s give them, a loud of applause!” Nanginginig ang panga ko, at hindi ko alam kung bakit ako kinakabahan. Sa idea ba na sa iba ako magpapakasal, o sa reaksyon nang mga makakakita sa amin? I could barely look at anyone as we walked down the aisle, my head low, my face hidden by the veil. My mind kept replaying everything that had led to this—everything I’d had to do to keep the truth from my family.The staff had handed the script to the emcee earlier, but as soon as she said Lexus’s name, she hesitated, a