When she kissed me I said the Hail Mary five times. It didn't work. My feelings grew.
"Aquilino..." she moaned. I had been distracted by her all night.
I move in closer and we hugged. It went on for the longest time, and then we kissed. A long soul- deep kiss that kept on going, even after we broke apart for air. By this time, I was rock hard.
"Babe, may I remind you that this is a sin..." I whispered on her ear.
Growing up in a culturally mainstream religious family, sinning wasn't something I thought about much. I cannot commit mistake.
Ako ang panganay. Lahat ng obligasyon sa pamilya sa akin binigay. Hindi ako pwedeng magkamali. Dapat lahat ng gawin ko ay tama. Walang lugar dapat ang pagkakamali.
But since that night happened I did sinned and still do until now.
I now see myself as someone who sins on a regular basis, and I'm working on that because of her.
The word means something different for me than it does in contemporary culture. As a child I learned that to sin is to do something really bad.
If you look it up you'll find it usually refers to a violation of a religious code of conduct.
So by this definition if you're not religious, you can't really sin, because you have no religious code of conduct to violate.
"Is it okay if you sinned because of me?" I asked her as she caressed the side of my cheeks.
She nodded. Damn. Ang swerte ko. She is a gorgeous woman with a hard, sexy body. Madalas nga lang nakatago dahil sa palaging suot niya. She has nice firm tits and an ass that turns heads wherever she goes.
"We will both regret this tomorrow babe..."
I stood up, and I took off my clothes piece by piece, slowly and deliberately. Hindi maalis ang tingin niya sa akin nang napailing.
"I don't care anymore."
Iyon na sa wakas ang hudyat. Mukhang hindi na rin niya ako matiis.
"Are you sure? We are commiting a sin."
"It started already. I can't get you out of my mind since that night. I don't care anymore."
She's sitting three feet in front of me. When I got to my briefs, the last thing I had on, I locked my gaze upon her eyes and slowly
took them down.Releasing her from my stare, she looked
at my cock, and drew in her breath. "Oh my..."Bless me, father, for I have sinned...
I prayed silently in my head. I thought what I was feeling was wrong but fuck, I'm loving every bit of what I am doing.
Bless me, father, for I have sinned...
I was waiting for an answer from you all this time I couldn't just move on with my life. She saved me. She was there when I needed support from someone.
Bless me, father, for I have sinned...
I think I am already smitten. Is our love considered a sin?
Was she a sin?
I thought love is always supposed to win.
I then kneeled down and started unbuttoning her habit. Only after getting all the buttons undone did I then open her shirt to behold her small breasts.
"You're so hard, Aquilino..."
"That's because of you, babe..."
I could see the swell of her chest with her rapid breathing, and I could see her athletic heart pounding through her skin and muscle just above her left breast.
I then touched her nipples, which left us both gasping, partly from the build-up to this moment, and partly from the feeling the touch gave her and me.
"Ahh... Aquilino..." She pressed her entire body into my finger tips, and then I massaged her breasts with my finger tips and palms.
While her breasts were triple A size, they were extremely sensitive in that moment of passion.
"Babe, this is a dream come true," I told her.
I asked her to stand up and then I inserted my hands inside her pantylet and lowered them down. Unencumbered by underwear, the view of her female sex was immediate.
She was in such great shape that there was a space between her legs where her vagina was, and I took advantage of that by touching the entire area very lightly.
"Oh... Jesus Christ! I'm dying. I am on fire. I cannot extinguish myself," she said.
She took hold of my cock and slid her small hand up and down the shaft. I gently squeezed her breasts, and we stayed that way for five minutes, slowing building up the pressure and intensity of the moment.
Sometimes light, as if our fingertips were feathers, sometimes harder, with insistence and a view to consummate this moment.
It was pure pleasure that we were giving and receiving. Lowering my hand, I then rubbed her clitoris and surrounding labial lips in a lazy fashion.
Her breathing came hard; her teeth clenched. She managed to get out.
"Aquilino you're driving me crazy. Make me come."
"Not yet," I whispered in a ragged voice.
"I want you, Aquilino... I want you now!"
"We're going to remember this the rest of our lives. Let's not rush this moment." she looked at me, and held my gaze for an eternity, and nodded yes.
"It's time..." after minutes of this deliberate stimulation, we both looked at each other and said together.
She increased her rubbing of my cock; and I increased the frequency of my attention to her body. From deep within each of us a growling, shaking, and uncontrollable force began to erupt.
"Ooh! Aah!" I groaned- loving the fucking sensation that she gives.
"Aah. Ang sarap mo Aquilino. Sa akin ka lang dapat lalabasan ng ganito."
Her inner legs locked on my hand and held it there as she came all over it, at the same time my cock erupted its pent-up passion into her hands and all over her lower
body."Nakita niyo ba si Sister Ramona?" bigla kaming natahimik nang marinig iyon sa labas ng pinto.
Tinanggal niya ang pagkakahawak sa p*********i ko. Ngumuso ako. Ano ba naman 'yan! Gusto ko nang ipasok ang akin sa kanya. Bitin pa ako! Gusto ko pa!
Pambihira naman!
"Bakit po Mother Superior?" sagot ng nasa labas.
Nagkatinginan kami. Gusto kong matawa sa tila takot na mukha nito. Nang makita niyang kanina ko pa siya tinititigan, sinamaan niya ako ng tingin.
"May sasabihin lang sana. Hindi ko siya makita."
Ilang minuto kaming nanatiling hindi makagalaw sa pangamba na mahuli kami rito sa kwartong ito. Hindi ko pa naman inilock iyon. Basta ko lang siya hinila dito
Hawak ko ang beywang niya habang nakatutok ang akin sa bukana ng pagkababae niya. Pumipintig-pintig at matigas pa.
"Baka nasa labas ho, Madre. Gusto niyo po bang samahan ko po kayo sa paghahanap sa kanya?"
Ang mga mata niya ngayon ay nasa may pintuan at taimtim na nakikinig sa usapan sa labas. Gumalaw ako ng bahagya. Bahagyang binabangga ang labi ng pagkababae niya sa matigas at mahaba kong ari.
Mabilis na lumipat ang mga mata niya sa akin. Napatingala ako at napapikit sa sarap. Ang sarap. Gusto ko na kaagad labasan.
"Ikikiskis ko lang." sabi ko sa mahinang boses at nagsimula nang magbayo.
Sasakit ang puson ko kapag hindi ko ito mailabas ngayon. Hindi maman siya nagreklamo. Sa tuwing ilalayo ko ang akin para magbwelo ay napapaangat siya upang ipagdikit at ipagkiskis ulit ang mga iyon.
"Aah-" bago pa siya umungol ay inilagay ko na ang kamay ko sa may bibig niya.
Natigil ako sa pagbayo dahil parang papalapit ang mga yabag ng paa sa kwarto namin.
"May narinig ka bang ingay, Sister Si?"
"Wala naman po? Bakit po?"
"Wala. Huwag na. Ipagpapabukas ko nalang ito. Bumalik ka na sa kwarto mo." saad ng matandang madre sa labas.
"Sige po. Magandang gabi po ulit. Nawa'y makatulog ho kayo ng maayos." sagot ng kausap nito sa labas.
Ramdam ko ang sobrang lakas ng tibok ng puso niya. Takot na takot na baka mahuli kami. Napangisi ako. Bumayo ulit para makiskis ang mga ari namin. Mukhang makakatulog talaga ako ng maayos ngayon.
Sige pa rin ang pagbayo ko. Hindi ko ipinapasok at pinapasayad ko lang sa labi ng pagkababae niya. Kiskis palang, parang gusto ko nang magpalabas. Ngayon lang ako parang nakuntento sa ganito.
"Ang init. Ang sarap." mahinang sabi ko.
Papahina na ang mga yabag ng nasa labas. Tahimik na rin, tanging tibok ng puso at malalalim na hininga namin ang naririnig.
"Ipasok mo na Aquilino! Bilis na!" mahina at puno ng pagpipigil na sabi nito nang alisin ko ang kamay ko sa bibig niya.
Napahalakhak ako. Patuloy pa rin sa pagbayo. Ibang-iba ang pinapakita niya ngayon sa akin na ugali niya kaysa pag nasa labas siya at nakasuot ng habit niya.
"Once I inserted my cock in your vagina, there is no turning back." my voice is hoarse, sinasabayan pa ng mahinang ungol.
"Oh God! I don't care anymore! Put it inside me!" sagot nito na tila nahihirapan na ng sobra.
"Alright, Sister Ramona. Accept this hard cock of mine inside you..." before she could answer I already slammed my cock inside her. She's crying and moaning because of pleasure.
My world was about to turn upside down and I didn't care at all. Fuck destiny, fuck fate, fuck the norm.
I was writing my own love or whatever-it-was story and I was going to love every single moment of it.
Kabanata 1SinI've never been lucky when it comes to love.Endless cycles of heartache and heartbreak define what is supposed to be the biggest and greatest adventure of my life, at twenty, I had given up already.Nag-umpisa iyon sa pamilya ko. Kahit anong gawin ko... hindi pa rin sapat. Kulang pa rin ako, palaging si Lazarus ang magaling, kahit ginagawa ko naman ang lahat maging magaling lang sa mata nila."You should always aim for excellence. You are the only one I can count on in our business." Dad reminded me.I am the first born so that explains how much pressure they put on me. Iyon din ang kinaiinggitan ko kay Lazarus eh, kung ako siguro naging bunso, hindi ganito ang responsibilidad na maiaatas sa akin.Ako sana ang paborito nila... kaso, ayoko ring magpari. Dinidiktahan nila ang buhay ng kapatid ko.N
Kabanata 2KissIt makes me cringe to remember how rude I was to women as a young man. I would stand girls up if something or someone better came along in an instant, without explanation."Ganun-ganon nalang iyon, Aquilino?" I was in the middle of flirting with my new girl when the one I met last night suddenly appeared.She was boring, okay? Walang thrill. Hindi man lang ako kaagad nilabasan. Hindi man lang marunong mangromansa. Puro ako lang ang gumagalaw."Pagkatapos kong ibigay sa'yo ang lahat ipagpapalit mo lang ako sa babaeng ito?!"Idinuro-duro niya ang babaeng kasama ko. Madrama naman siyang napahawak sa dibdib niya. I rolled my eyes heavenward and sighed.Here we go again."Oh, anong problema mo sa akin? Iniwan ka na diba? Tanggapin mo nalang, girl." sagot naman ng kasama kong babae.I smirked. I still didn't
Kabanata 3VoiceI was kicked-out.Agad-agad iyon. My Lola raised hell when she heard what I did. She tried to cover things up but catholic school will always be catholic school. Money cannot buy their values and integrity."Kailan ka ba magtitino, Aquilino?!" Lola combed her hair in annoyance and frustration.I stooped. With all that has happened today, it is only now that I feel guilty for what I did. Funny, I still had the courage to escape the sin I had committed a while ago because we have lots of money.But earlier, when I saw our Assistant Principal, who can't barely look at me and whenever our gazes met, her face looked sick. It feels like she's disgusted of me. It feels like whenever she's given the chance to look at me, her memory comes back when she saw us earlier.That look on her face reminded me of my parents and my lo
Kabanata 4Angelus"Crush mo 'no?" Isaac looked at me with a silly grin on his face.I raised an eyebrow at him. I am immediately retracting my comment on him seemingly incapable of committing a sin. Parang magaling din siyang mangbuwisit."Crush mo ata, eh! Ayie!" he's annoying to look at right now.Hindi ako umimik. Her beautiful face is still vivid in my memory. She has curly hair that is up to her small waist. Her face is small, but has beautiful and tantalizing eyes. Her nose is very sharp. And her lips... Damn, it looks so soft and enticing to kiss."Naku, Aquilino. Bakit ka namumula? Sinasabi ko sayo, wala kang pag-asa kay Ramona.""Bakit naman wala?"Hindi pa ako hinihindian ng kahit sinong babae! Hindi maalis ang mala-tsismosong itsura ni Isaac ngayon. Agad tuloy akong nagsisi sa biglang pagtanong ko. Nagtunog interesado tulo
Kabanata 5BistadoI saw how her eyes widens and how it blinks three times while our lips are againts each other. I kissed her gently on the lips. My desire went high whe she slipped her arms back around my neck. My tongue probed her mouth and things began to really heat up.I was about to tilt my head on the other side so that I could completely cover and taste her lips but she immediately pushed my chest using her hands.She made her upper lip wet with her tongue, not yet satisfied, she then bit it.Shit."That was hot..." I commented in a husky voice.Akmang hahalikan ko ulit siy
Kabanata 6Meet"Pero rinig-rinig ko balak din daw magmadre si Ramona. Paano na'yan, Aquilino?" tanong ni Miguel habang naglalakad na kami palabas ng campus.I remained silent after they found out the truth. My eyes widened slightly at the revelation I heard. Life is really testing me. Why is that?So that's explains why she's shunning men?That's why she doesn't seem to be interested in me because she's going to be a nun! I was also really moved by the strength of his resistance to temptation. Biruin mo, hindi ako madaling tanggihan, si Lolo Theodore na ang nagsabi na napakalandi ko.Sayang. Hindi siya pwede doon. Ang ganda niya masyado.
Karma ko na siguro 'to.Dati, ako ang madalas magsabi ng mga ganoong kataga sa iba. "Aqui, I don't want us to be like this anymore... Pang-kama mo na lang ba talaga ako?"She was sitting on the end of the bed while the thin blanket was wrapped around her bare chest. We just finished having sex. Her face was disappointed. Mukhang nagsasawa na sa ganitong sitwasyon namin. This is why I don't want to have sex with the same woman repeatedly. They will look for a label when the time comes. That's something I don't want. I'm not ready to commit just yet. This setup is great for me. Walang halong pagmamahal, sex lang. Hanggang dito lang sa kama. Kapag natapos na, kapag nakuha na namin ang gusto namin sa isa't-isa, 'yun na. Parang hindi ko pa kasi kayang magkaroon ng karelasyon. Hindi ko gusto ang pinagbabawalan. Hindi ako makakabwelo. Pakiramdam ko ay masasakal lang ako. Hindi ako magiging masaya. At saka, sa mga edad na ito, ito dapat
Tunog kaagad ng matandang orasan ang gumising sa akin. Isa lang ang hudyat nito, alas kwatro na sa umaga at malamang sa malamang ay gising na rin ang mga madre ngayon. Mabilis akong bumangon at inayos ang aking higaan. Habang nagdadasal sila ay gagawa na ako ng almusal nila. Ganito na ang ginagawa ko simula nang kupkupin nila ako rito. It has become a routine.Lumaki ako sa mga madre. Iniwan ako ng nanay ko at sumama sa ibang lalaki. Wala na akong ibang pamilyang mapuntahan. Ang tatay ko ay namatay na rin nang ma-raid sa isang buy bust operation dahil sa ipinagbabawal na gamot. Before, I had always felt some sense of purpose. Mostly because my purpose for the last 18 years of my life was to help with the activities here in the convent in return for the nuns' kindness to me. Kinupkop nila ako, binihisan at pinag-aaral. Dapat lang na suklian ko ang mga kabaitan nila sa akin. Then repeat all of this the following year."Ramona,
It's sometimes simpler to harden your heart and chose wrath. It's far easier to block those who have injured you or violated your affection and trust. Sometimes we believe there is no other option; that healing begins with distance and their absence; that in order to live your life, you must expel the toxins and agony they imparted; yet we do so by employing their techniques.We sometimes choose to be angry. We choose to react and get enraged; it is this wrath that we use as an explanation for our actions. We rationalize our retaliatory actions by recalling the actions of our rivals.I can never completely let go as long as I linger on my own misery and self-pity. Who am I to say you don't deserve my forgiveness when it's human to make mistakes? I've made errors in the past that I'd like people to forgive me for. I'm letting go of my ego by forgiving him. It indicates I've accepted the misery you've inflicted on me. It implies I no longer see you as the person who wrecked my life.
Bumalik ulit ang kaba sa aking dibdib. Pagkapasok namin sa loob ay hindi ko makita si Aquilino dahil pinapalibutan ito ng mga katulad ng nasa labas, ay mga businessman din. Dito ko talaga nakita at napaghalintulad na mga circle of friends niya ay mga negosyante na din na katulad niya.Sabay-sabay silang napatingin sa pagpasok naming dalawa ni Akihiro. Nakahawak ng mahigpit ang anak ko sa aking kamay. Parang pusang naninibago sa lugar at nangingilala pa ng paligid.Gumilid ang mga nakapalibot na lalaki sa amin para mabigyang daan at tuluyan nang masulyapan si Aquilino. Halos maiyak ako nang makita ko siyang nakaupo sa kama, humihinga, mayroon nang malay. Hindi na katulad noong mga nakaraang araw na hindi man lang gumalaw ang kamay nito!Blangko at hindi ko mabasa ang itsura niya. Bago pa man ako tuluyang makapagbigay ng reaksyon ay tumakbo nang mabilis ang anak ko papunta sa kama ng Papa Aquilino niya. Gulat na gulat pa rin sa mga nangyayari, ang mga nakapaligid ay napanganga nang matu
Siyempre, hindi ako mag-isang pumunta sa ospital. Dahil ilang araw ding hindi nagkita ang mag-ama ay nagpumilit talaga si Akihiro na sumama. Umiiyak na ito nang papaalis na ako ng mansion. Hindi ko sana pasasamahin dahil natatakot akong makakuha ito ng sakit dahil ospital ang pupuntahan namin. Mahina pa naman ang resistensya nito. Pero dahil nagpupumilit ito at hindi na matigil sa kakaiyak, isinama ko nalang para wala nang masyadong iisipin. Hindi kasi makontrol at kahit na mga katulong na sa mansion ay hindi siya mapatahan. Gustong-gusto niya daw makita ang Papa niya. "I really miss my Papa..." saad nito nang nasa sasakyan na kami patungo sa ospital na kung saan nandoon ang Papa niya. Fifteen minutes away lang ito sa village. "Ako rin, anak." saad ko dito. Ngayong ganito ang nangyari, napagtanto hindi talaga permanente ang ating buhay dito sa mundo. Hindi natin alam kung kailan ang huli, hindi natin alam kung ano ang mangyayari bukas, dapat, ipakita at iparamdam natin sa mga ta
Everything has gone swimmingly for the past several weeks that we have been in Manila with Aquilino's parents. Aquilino became preoccupied with his work, and Akihiro seldom cries when he had to leave the house for work. He also attends a neighborhood kindergarten school. Every Monday to Wednesday, I attend a review center nearby to Aquilino's workplace. Everything is going well. Now, I only have a month to review for my board examination."Love," Aquilino peek out the door as it opened slightly. I'm scanning my review book. Kanina pa ako ditong abala at tuwing kakain lang ako lalabas. Araw ng linggo, walang trabaho si Aquilino. Unti-unti na ring nakakabalik sa normal ang estado ng kumpaniya nila at kapag ganitong araw, palagi dapat silang may Papa and Akihiro time. Hinahayaan ko lang ang mag-ama sa kung ano ang gustong gawin ng mga ito. Kapag weekdays kasi ay maaga umaalis si Aquilino at kapag uuwi naman ay medyo late na. Marami kasing inaasikaso sa kumpaniya nila. Bumabawi naman
"Let us go to our room so we can start making Akihiro's sibling, Ramona."That's what Aquilino stated as soon as he stood up from his seat. We had just finished our meal. I quickly glared at him. His parents laughed at his naughtiness. Hindi na talaga matigil ang panghaharot nito sa akin! Mas nakakabuwelo pa ito at mas lalo pa talaga akong inaasar. Hindi pa kami nakakaisang araw dito ganito na itong si Aquilino. Baka kapag talagang natuluyan at hindi na ako nakapagtimpi at baka naman umuwi ako sa probinsyang buntis na naman!Ayoko ng ganoon! Hindi pa talaga kami tuluyang naaayos, may problema pang kinakaharap si Aquilino, hindi pa tuluyang bumabalik ang ala-ala niya... masyadong kumplikado pa ang lahat. "Just slow down, son. You've just returned from a trip!" his Daddy commented. Napahilot nalang ako sa aking sintido. Hindi pa rin tumatayo sa kinauupuan. Nahihiya na ako sa mga magulang nito. "I'm just kidding, Dad." he answered to his Father. He was looking at me and waiting for me
Leaving.Just hearing that term makes me want to cry. Just thinking that I will leave them tomorrow tears stream down my cheeks. They are neither happy nor sad tears. They are tears from every emotion I've ever felt or created in this place. They're tears of regret for not being able to remain. I'm wishing I didn't have to go. I wish I had more alternatives."Bakit hindi ka pa natutulog at pumapasok sa loob, Ramona?" nagulat ako nang biglang nagsalita mula sa aking likod si Sr. Si. Natawa siya nang makitang nagimbal ang katawan ko sa pagkakagulat nang dumating at nagsalita siya. "Kape pa more," natatawang sabi nito nang maupo ito sa tabi ko. Parehas kaming napatingin sa kawalan. "Bukas na ang alis niyo, no? Nakapaghanda na ba kayo ng mga dadalhin niyo?""Tapos na po..." sagot ko rito. Kahapon pa kami nag-impake nila Aquilino. Hindi naman marami ang dinala namin. Kailangan na kasi talaga naming makaalis. Hindi na raw maganda ang lagay ng kumpaniya nila. Lumalaki na raw ang nawawalang
Kinaumagahan, dahan-dahan akong bumangon sa kama. Mga bandang alaso tres na ako nakatulog nang itulak ko nang dahan-dahan si Aquilino para doon naman yumakap kay Akihiro. Hindi kasi ako mapakali na hindi ito abot-kamay, kung hindi naman ay may nakaagapay sa gilid na pwede niyang yakapin.Baka mahulog ito. Nangangamba ako na baka kapag nahulog ito ay makatama ang ulo niya sa sahig. Nagkatrauma na ako dail noong baby pa ito, muntik itong mahulog sa kama. Dala na rin ng post-partum, noong unang dalawang buwan kasi ni Akihiro ay hindi ko ito pinapansin at ayaw na ayaw ko itong nakikita. Mabuti nalang at mabilis na nakarespondedang mga madre. Kaunti nalang daw ay mahuhulog na ito. Kung hindi siguro naagapa, walang malaming na Akihiro ngayon. Kung hindi din iyon nangyari, baka hanggang ngayon, malayo ang loob ko sa anak ko.Iyon ang nagbukas ng isip ko para pahalagahan si Akihiro dahil ito lang ang pamilya mayroon ako.Magkayakap ang mag-ama nang iwan ko. Inayos ko pa ang kumot nilang dal
One of the most challenging difficulties we might face in life is realizing how little time we frequently have to spend in some of life's greatest moments. It's at times like this that you wish your train was delayed, or that his grin might last just a little longer, or that he would reconsider going after all.We cannot keep people for longer than we are meant to have them. Maybe they are ours for years or maybe we were only lucky enough to know them for just a few, quick moments. Whatever the case and whoever they are, just know that the length of a moment does not dictate its value in your life. You can meet someone once and remember them forever, or you can spend years with someone who will eventually become nothing more than a distant, foggy memory.Love will often come to you in the unlikeliest of times, and if you spend that time dreaming of what it could be, you will miss out on all that you already have.But if we never tried, we would have never experienced all of the beauti
"This is my school, Papa!" iminuwestra ni Akihiro ang kanilang paaralan sa kaniyang Papa. Pagkababa namin ng kotse ay agad na hinagilap ni Akihiro ang kamay ng kaniyang Papa at naunang maglakad. Tinginan kaagad ang mga tao nang bumaba kami sa sasakyan. Hindi ko iyon pinansin. "We play there with my friends every break time and PE time, Papa!" tinuro pa ni Akihiro sa Papa niya ang playground na madalas nga nilang paglaruan ng mga kaibigan niya. Tuwing susunduin ko ito at wala sa classroom nito ay madalas ko siyang matagpuan doon."Alam mo na kung saan hahanapin ang anak mo kapag susunduin mo ito," natatawa kong sabi kay Aquilino. "Iyon kung hindi ka pa babalik sa Maynila para sa trabaho mo." dagdag ko pa. Pila ang mga estudyante at mga magulang sa may gate. Nasa huli kami bago tuluyang makapasok sa may mismong gate ng paaralan. Dahil nasa unahan ang mag-ama at nasa likod nila ako, nilingon ako ni Aquilino nang nakanguso. Hindi nagustuhan ang huling sinabi ko. "Ayan ka na naman s