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First Love Dies
First Love Dies
Author: YNCEEE

01

Author: YNCEEE
last update Last Updated: 2022-06-01 13:48:58

01

I watch my friend play with her children while I sit here in the corner and just watch them. It's been years now and I'm getting older each day. I don't know where and what are my destinations in life. They say when your first love broke your heart you will never forget about him, and I think because of that I still can't move on even though years has passed.

"Myles, what are you doing there all alone. Join us." My friend Faye dragged me so I could join them with her kids.

Her daughter immediately went to me and gave me a hug, she has now 2 children. They are growing and moving forward while I'm stuck to where he left me.

I tried to go on and move forward. I even tried dating but every man that I date won't pass my standard. The man who left me set my standard high and I don't know how to lower them.

"Uhm, did you get the invitation card?" Faye asked with caution.

I nodded and smiled at her, but she just looks at me seriously. I know, she's angry but there's nothing more I can do.

"I'm fine." I smiled at her.

"You always say that, but you never were, since that day."

I couldn't stand her sadness, so I left early. I don't want to burden anyone just because I'm sad or hurt. I can take care of myself, and unlike before she has a family to take care now.

It's just me now, walking in the park enjoying the fresh air.

I close my eyes as I sit in the bench, imagining he's here by my side. I want to think of our happy memories, but I can't because I'm sitting at the place where our story ended.

"You can't cry here."

A person's figure catches my eye. I wipe tears so I could clearly who is it.

A man is sitting by my side as I open my eyes. He looks at me seriously and for some reason he looks angry. I don't know him. I wipe my tears immediately as they won't stop coming out in my eyes and I avoided his eyes, they were too much to handle.

I though it was him for a second

"Sorry." I said and stood up so I can go.

"You look pathetic, you shouldn't cry about something you can't control." He said and left before I could.

My eyes creased as I heard him say that. What did he mean by that? Do I know him?

I went home crying and crying and it's not even new to me. I always cry and he's always the reason why.

I want to scream, maybe when I do that the pain won't be here anymore. It's just like I cry so I can feel a lot better, but the truth is the pain is still there, there's no difference.

"Are you sure you're coming? You don't have to you know."

"No, I have to." Faye seems hesitant but agreed with my decision.

We enter the church and we saw a lot of familiar people. Our batch mate greets us. Some even look at me like they're sorry but there's nothing to be sorry about.

"I didn't know you would come. It's nice to see you." Missy hugged me tight.

"I should. I don't want to miss this event out." I said in confidence even though my heart is breaking into a million pieces.

She looks shock, she must have thought that I might broke down here but no I won't let that happen, I don't want to look helpless in front of the man I love the most and I want to see him even that mean I must attend his weeding.

"You guys came."

"Of course, we can't miss your weeding."

I turned stone cold as I heard his voice. I slowly turn so I could see him, and I didn't know how I manage to smile at him as our eyes met.

I miss him, I want to hug him, I want to beg him to take me back, I was that desperate.

We just look at each other's eyes, he began to make his way to me, and I don't know how to react. Before he could say anything, I quickly turned my back at him and start walking fast outside the church.

I can't see clearly now because of my tears but I still walk so I could escape him.

"Stop running." He held my arms and that made me weak.

"I'm sorry, I though I can face you, but I can't. I have to leave I was stupid for coming here."

He was lost for words; he didn't know what to say. I can tell just by looking at him.

"I miss you. I still think of you every time, but you know what? My love for you is so big that I am happy that you are getting married even if it isn't me, you're marrying."

"Myles."

"It's okay. It was not your fault. It never was and I don't blame you for that. I just blame you for treating me so precious that I can't lower my standard anymore." I chuckled.

"She makes me happy, she loves me too." I nodded.

"As long as your happy, that what matters."

"How about you?"

"I'll keep admiring you from afar, just like before?" I chuckled.

"I'm sorry."

"You don't have to be sorry, I choose this, I wanted this."

"But still."

"I will be fine, I'm strong, remember? I can overcome this." He nodded.

"I guess this is where our story ends?"

He didn't say anything and just hugged me tight.

"No."

His answer confused me, but I didn't ask any further. I don't want to anymore. I just want to think that this is where our story ends but the truth is it ended years ago, I was a coward to accept that before. 

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    24“I can go home on my own you know? I’m not a little kid anymore.” I said to Asher as he walk me outside.“My mom insisted I should take you home. Let’s just go, plus they would hate it when they’re not sure that you got home safe.”I pouted. He has a point but I hate that he has the last say.“Fine.” I said and walk to the passenger side of his car. “Open the door.” I said as I can’t open it. He didn’t and walk towards me before clicking something before opening the door for me. “I can do it you know if you had clicked it.”He just shrugged and walk to the driver’s side. We drove in silent after I told him my address and now that we’re here in my apartment I don’t know why he went down on his car too.“What are you doing? I’m already here, you can go now. Thank you for the ride.”“I want to walk you home. Just to make sure.” he put his hands on his pocket. Oh, did I mention that he;s still wearing his button down shirt with his slacks that perfectly hugged his biceps in place?“I c

  • First Love Dies    23

    23“Miss Myles?”“Yes?” I stood up from my chair still can’t believe that I just saw Asher… again after the wedding.“Let’s go.” She said that made me confuse but still followed her. I didn’t really had the change to ask her where we’re going but I already had my speculation the moment we stop walking and stop at the door the boss’ office… Asher’s office.“What are we doing here?” I nervously asked. I don’t really know how to face Asher right now. I didn’t expect him to be my boss and years of being friends why didn’t he even mention that his family own this company? Is that why when I was overlooking this company his mom appeared out of nowhere? It’s all making sense now but even after realizing that I’m still not ready to meet him as he saw me in my lowest and it still hurt me every night how easily I threw our friendship away for Harry--Harry who doesn’t care about me and hurt me more than I can remember.“Oh, the CEO wanted to meet you.” She smile and knock the door before openin

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    22“Is it true?”“What’s true?”“That you were cheating and if you are tell it to me immediately.” Even if I had told Asher that I don’t believe him and that Harry wouldn’t do that to me, I still can’t help but ask him. It’s been bothering me for a while and we had a fight but that didn’t stop me from talking to him about it.“What are you talking about? I won’t do that to you. I know I was a jerk last time but I realize my mistake now. I cherish you and you’re important to me.” He said but his face looks gloomy and I’m scared because my friendship with Asher just ended and what if he’s right? Not only did I loose my boyfriend but I also lost my best friend.“Okay. Thank you for telling me.” I smiled and left him and begin to walk towards my classroom where Asher is sitting in his usual seat.When he saw that I enter the room he immediately look at me or maybe wait for me to sit on his side but I sat a few chairs from him that made some girl sit on my usual seat.I pouted and look awa

  • First Love Dies    21

    21“Mom, do we really have to do this? This is just absurd. I can’t believe this is happening.”Mom nodded and didn’t even look at me. “It’s the least we can do, Myles.”“What do you mean by that? Dad doesn’t deserve even the least mom and you know that! I hate this, don’t we have shame?”“Myles! He’s still your father and yes we’re going because he stayed for us even though we were divorce, for your sake.” She said and look at me through the mirror.I bit my lips and shook my head. “I know that mom but I don’t want to be there and act like this is okay for me because the truth is I’m hurting and going to his wedding will do more damage than good.”“I’m sorry, honey but I promise your dad and you know promises are sacred and I like to keep mine.”“Well, for dad promises aren’t sacred because the moment he chose someone else even after you got married all his promises were broken mom. I hope you realize that.” I close my eyes tight. “I’m sorry, that was out of line. I’ll be waiting in

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