Chapter Eight - Space Between Us

I felt sick to my stomach and Tawny was ignoring me. I tried calling and texting but she was too busy for me. I was losing my mind. It stupidly hurt and I was so confused.

On Friday I got a text from her..

TEE: Hey, so you've been asking for us to meet. Come to my place today.. I'll be home during the day.

That text felt so cold I shivered a bit..

I fixed myself though and got ready to see her. I couldn't believe that she didn't tell me who she was. I felt like our friendship was not real a bit. She should have told me..

I was ready to tell her how shitty this made me feel.. but mostly I was happy coz I'll be seeing her.

...

After what felt like a forever walk from her gate to the house inside her yard, I finally came in view with her laying on the long beach benches right outside next to her pool. I walked closer and noticed the Corona extra beer in her hand.... when I came in view with her whole body, she had on black Jordan shorts, a gutter of Calvin Klein Cotton Stretch Trunk showed right above the shorts from the inside, a black Calvin Klein sports bra, white socks and sunglasses. Her abs were all out there... and she was laying as if she was on some Calvin Klein photoshoot.... life of a celebrity. Must have felt fucken nice to be her...

Suddenly I felt a bit nervous as I came to stand right next to the pool and a bit away from her. She turned to my side and looked at me. I kept quiet hoping and praying she says something, but she didn't, she just shook her head and looked away.

I sighed internally.. I should say something. I wanted us to talk so I shou...

"Is this why you're here?" She asked cutting me off. I didn't even realize that she removed ber glasses and now was looking at me.

I looked at her confused though, what did she mean? "what?"

"Did you come here to just stand there and look at me? Coz I don't remember reading a text that says you just wanna look at me..."

Woow.. okay, she honestly was not in the mood, but I remembered that I was mad at her and I was brave enough to make first contact so that we can fix things coz I missed her. So I took in the deepest breath and talked, trying not to let my anger take control, "Tee you have been hiding your life from me.. You are this different person that I don't even know."

She got up into a sitting position and put the beer on the groud, "I am me.. and that's who you got to know.. not what everyone else knows.."

I sighed, "why didn't you tell me at least. You could have told me you're famous or something and not have me feel this stupid.. like we are this close yet you're hiding staff from me.."

She chuckled but I could tell it was just a chuckle of amusement, "woooow.. fancy of you to be talking about hiding staff from each other yet you never felt the need to tell me you have a boyfriend.."

I groaned, "I never hid that.. it just never came up.."

She nodded her head, "exactly Amora.. it never came up... you spend so much time with me.. yet you're keeping that from me? How do you think I feel?"

"The same way I feel coz you didn't feel the need to tell me about you and your life as a star..." I said, "Tee don't you trust me..? I thought we were friends.. why would you keep that from me? Why?"

She shook her head a bit and looked at the ground. I kept quiet waiting for her to respond to me. I wanted to know.

"Don't you think I deserved to know... Tee we are friends and I thought I knew you..."

She huffed and turned to me with one look I couldn't describe on her face, "for the first time.. the first time since I got famous Amora, you came along and I was so happy to be my true self and be treated like me and not some stupid famous rugby star... You wanna know how my "famous" life is? Full of fake friends, people who only want me so they can have access to these private huge ass parties, so they can get free tickets from me to some stupid game, so I can hook them up with famous people, so they can milk my money from meee.. it was like that until I actually made a true friend in YOU, you who didn't care about my money and my status.. who just wanted me for me and I could joke about anything with you. I could literally mess up a sentence and you wouldn't judge me coz you are not expecting me to be perfect all the time.. with you I can mess up anyhow and be however without worrying that you'll stupidly talk to the press for money or even sell some lie story about me.. You made me be myself and actually enjoy it coz it's been a while.. so forgive me for actually showing you the real me and keeping it that way..."

I frowned, "that's awful Tee, what they are doing to you is awful .. but you know me. I'd never do that to you.. I swear."

She shook her head a bit, "do I? Do I even know you Mimi? Tell me... do I?"

I was taken back by that question and a bit hurt, "yea you do.. I've been nothing but myself to you too. You know me."

She got up and walked towards me, intimidating the living shit out of me. I was seeing her so fucken clear now. I've seen her face on billboards but brushed it off.. that hairstyle that made her cute and her advertising some deodorant or standing next to some female sports starts.. I notice only now that I actually have seen her before..

"Then why did you feel the need to keep the fact that you have a boyfriend from me? I thought we were friends.. like you put it."

If I wasn't intimidated by her I would have rolled my eyes, but I kept my shit under control, "like I said it never came up Tee.."

"How much time did we spend with each other..? we've been on the phone..? you've just been acting like someone who's single.."

I sighed, "well I'm not okay.. I'm not single and I'm sorry it never came up. When I'm with you, I am with you and it was just amazing and I wanted to talk about what we talked about.. I wasn't hiding Nash at all..."

She looked at me, one look I managed to register: hurt.. and it honestly confused me. Did I hurt her that much by forgetting to mention my stupid boyfriend? I enjoyed my friendship with her and wanted to just concentrate on her when we were together.

I pushed that at the back of my head and decided to be a bigger person, I decided to apologize because I don't think I could stand her being mad at me or not talking to me anymore, the past four days have been nothing but torture..

"I'm sorry okay.. I see, I should have said something.. so I'm sorry.."

She shrugged, "It's whatever..."

That got to me, I was apologizing and she was acting like a victim, as if me not mentioning Nash was bigger than it was, "Don't do that okay.. I'm apologizing here so that we can fix our friendship.."

She ached her brow at me, "fix our friendship.. I don't know about that... I really don't."

Hurt and confused I asked, "what does that mean Tawny?"

"That I fucken need space.. from this.. from you.. from this friendship.. I need some time and space from all of this.."

Fuck! That hurt like hell but I held my gaze at her. I didn't understand why she was blowing this out of proportion, it was not a big deal. It's not like now that I have a boyfriend it was suddenly going to change things between us, I was still me, her friend...

"Tee...." I exclaimed in almost a whisper, "I don't even get why you are so worked up by me having a boyfriend. It doesn't change anything..."

"Oh it doesn't?" She whisper yelled and I nodded feeling so fucken small under her stare, "yes it doesn't.. I'm still me, you're still you and you're my friend, I love you. Please.. I really don't know why this is getting to you. Nothing will change between us.."

Her face.. it seemd like every word I uttered was shit right now.. she took a step back from me and just looked at me. I extended my hand to touch her but she moved back again..

"Tee.. why does it bother you that I even have a fucken boyfriend.. you probably have a girlfriend and it wouldn't bother me one bit.."

Her face again.. God I swear whatever I was saying to make her look at me like that, I didn't mean it... I wasn't saying it with the intention of making her feel that way.

She sighed a bit, "look you wouldn't understand okay.. so it doesn't matter..."

"It does to me.. please.."

Whatever emotion she was on switched to anger within a second and she yelled, "I said it doesn't fucken matter didn't I?"

I kept quiet and stared at her then I nodded a bit. She shook her head a bit, "fine... you know your way out..."

And she left me standing there... confused and shocked..