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Chapter 18 - Plans
Huling Na-update:
2024-10-29 19:42:56Kaugnay na kabanata
Endless Soul Chapter 19 - Shorty Little Trip
Pagkatapos ng dalawang araw since nagtext nga si Lexus sa akin na dadaan siya ng Iloilo ay hindi na ako magkamayaw na padaliin ang oras. I don’t know kung bakit ganoon ako na-excite sa pagdating niya. And to add from it, ang gulo ng closet ko ngayon dahil naghahanap ako ng dress na babagay sa akin dahil ngayon nga ‘yong dating niya. Diba?! So weird! And 6:30 pa lang ngayon ng umaga!But aside from that, medyo weird lang ako sa part na nagpe-prepare ako ngayon sa pagdating niya when in fact I still haven’t received any texts from him. But why am I expecting him to text me? Girlfriend gano’n?Kaya I stopped panicking muna dahil hindi pa naman sure talaga kung bumyahe nga siya ngayon. So with that, nagpunta na lang ako ng instagram and nag-scroll. I saw a nice post from Kaila who’s wearing her bikini top and her short, then I commented a fire emoji.While scrolling, I saw a notification that Belle was live in IG, I was curious with the live so I clicked it and I saw Lexus’s face right aw
Endless Soul Chapter 20 - Little Initiative
After our lunch, we decided to stroll a bit in the city. I guided him kung saan ang way, then noong medyo na-bored na kami, I brought him in Jaro Cathedral. Because no Iloilo trip is ever complete without dropping by here and it was hailed as Iloilo’s oldest churches kaya must have talaga ang pagbisita rito.We entered the Cathedral and find a seat sa last part of the line. I was about to kneel to pray when I tilted my head to see him.“Magdadasal ka?” I asked him.“Uhh…I don’t k-know.” He said, unsurely. Agad na nangunot ang noo ko sa sinabi niya.“You should pray. You should repent, thanks, say sorry, tell him your wishes, and say I love you to him.” Sabi ko. Para naman akong nanay niya nito na tinuturuan siyang magdasal.“I don’t know what to say.” Sabi niya. I heaved a sigh at umupo muna.“Just say what your heart wanted to say. You can pray anything naman to him dahil naririnig niya lahat ng mga gusto mo sa buhay, well kahit hindi naman directly kasi alam niya kung ano ‘yong des
Endless Soul Chapter 21 - Confession
Hindi ko alam kung paano ko nakain o naubos ‘yong order kong Batchoy sa ganoong estado dahil ramdam ko talaga ang kilig sa buong sistema ko. I did not know that a small hair tie could mean something and make me so blue.Iiyak talaga ako kapag naiwala ko ‘tong bigay na back-up hair tie ni Lexus.“Babalik na ba tayo sa Zuri?” I asked him nang matapos kaming kumain.“Maybe oo, gabi na tapos magda-drive ka pa.” sabi niya.“Grabe, quarter to six pa lang naman, umuuwi nga ako ng bahay alas-otso eh.”“Are you suggesting something kung ganoon?” sabi naman niya.“Wala naman akong sinasabi, it’s just that ayoko pa talagang umuwi dahil maaga pa naman.”“You’re driving, and your parents…baka nga hinahanap ka na nila ngayon.” He added. So thoughtful naman.“Nakapagpaalam naman ako ng maayos.”“May sina-suggest ka yata eh kaya ayaw mo pang umuwi.” Sabi niya na puno ng suspetya.“You’re right,” I said.“I knew it. But are you sure hindi ka pagagalitan ng parents mo?”“Sure ako, promise.”“So…saan ta
Endless Soul Chapter 22 - Game
“Oh? Bakit ang aga mo yatang umuwi ngayon?” Takang tanong ni Mama sa akin nang makapasok ako sa loob ng bahay. Nasa living area siya kasama si Papa na nanunuod ng balita.See?! Masyadong maaga pa talaga ‘yong 7pm na uwi ko. Ayaw lang maniwala ni Lexus. Usually kasi 10 pm talaga ang uwi ko rito sa bahay kapag nakakauwi ako dahil sinusulit ko ang mga araw ng pananatili ko rito sa Iloilo.“Ah…napaaga ng hang-out ma. Pasok lang ako ng kwarto.” Sabi ko at diretsong pumasok sa kwarto ko at saka humilata. Kinuha ko ang cellphone ko sa bag ko para itext si Lexus.‘I’m home.” I texted him. Sabi kasi niya ay etext ko siya kapag nakauwi na ako sa bahay.‘Good. Kumain ka na rin.’ He texted back.‘Busog pa ako sa kinain natin kanina kaya baka hindi na ako mag-dinner.’‘Yeah right. Same, baka ‘di na rin ako.’‘Safe trip bukas! Hope you enjoyed your little stay here!’ – sabi ko sa text. Nag-cr muna ako saglit dahil ihing-ihi na ako. Lumabas din ako ng kwarto pagkatapos dahil tinawag ako nina mama at
Endless Soul Chapter 23 - Saying, Yes.
“Date me for 1 week.” He said after I asked him what his supposed consequence is after I lose the racing game in swimming.“Huh? Anong ibig mong…s-sabihin?” I said while stuttering.“Date, as in where two people do stuffs, and to tell you that’s not a question, it’s a statement.”“Bakit gusto mong idate kita? Nakakabigla ka naman.”“What do you think then?” sabi niya. Napa-isip ako ng medyo slight kasi, sobrang sudden naman ng tanong niya.“Wait…” I said first while trying to sink all his words. “Gusto mo ba ako?” I added a question with my eyes slowly getting bigger and bigger.I heard him sighed and looked away for a while.“I know I’ve been a jerk last day, at alam ko rin na may hinihintay kang sabihin ako but I didn’t because I was too shy to even start a conversation with it.” sabi niya. Ewan ko at bigla na lang akong napangisi sa kanya, I mean hindi ko maitago dahil kinikilig din naman kasi ako.He now looks like a boy next door who was too shy to even look at a girl. Ay pota n
Endless Soul Chapter 24 - Scream
Hindi ko akalaing pagkatapos ng small break namin sa law school ay babalik ako ng Manila na may boyfriend na, parang ang real-quick lang isipin. But gaya nga ng sabi ko, bakit ko pa patatagalin eh nararamdaman ko rin naman?Since maganda nga ang mood ko the moment na bumalik ako ng Manila, wala na akong ginawa sa buhay kundi ang magbasa ng magbasa. Noon medyo nagbibigay pa ako ng allowance sa sarili ng medyo mahabang break-time to do some stuffs or just do nothing, ngayon ay sobrang konti na lang dahil mas naging masipag pa ako lately.Ito ba ang nagagawa ng may jowa sa law school?“Ramirez,” our professor called me. On-deck ako for recitation kaya hindi talaga malabo na hindi ako matawag. Prepared naman ako kaya keri lang.“In the case of Demara v. Court of Appeals, was a crime committed?”“Yes, there was a crime committed. The Supreme Court ruled that when factual impossibility occurs because extraneous circumstances unknown to the actor or beyond his control, rendered the intended
Endless Soul Chapter 25 - Sweet
As I heard Cha’s scream, I run fast immediately. As I got inside Kaila’s unit, from there on, I saw Kaila’s wrist covered by her own blood, slowly trying to cover the white floor with redness.I didn’t know what to do at that moment, maybe because I was also in shocked to see her on that situation. But as soon as I heard Cha’s cry, lumapit ako saka dinaluhan si Kaila, sinabihan ko rin si Cha na pigilan niya ang patuloy na pagdurugo ng palapulsuhan ni Kaila kahit na taranta rin ako. Dali-dali akong naghanap ng towel sa kwarto ni Kaila.Nang makanap ay agad ko itong ipinalibot sa palapulsuhan nito. I then called an ambulance for emergency because Cha was shivering to even hold a phone, and then after that I tried calling Kaila’s mother right away using Kaila’s phone.“No, d-don’t call her. Kaila won’t like this.” Cha said crying while still holding Kaila’s wrist as gentle as possible.I sighed hard while looking at her.“I know she won’t like it but they are Kaila’s parents Cha. They sh
Endless Soul Chapter 26 - Warmth Kiss
“Ga,” I called him while removing my glasses.“Hmm?” he hummed and at the same time he raised both of his eyebrows. Both of his palms were placed in his jaw and his elbow was leaning on the table where I was reviewing. Nagdecide na lang ako na magreview ng kaunti kahit hapon pa ang klase ko.Well, it’s just that mahirap magpakawala agad when you know na unpredictable ng scenario palagi sa law school.I hissed.“Can you like not…” I pause, because I felt awkward. “Stare at me like that?” sabi ko. Hindi naman kasi ako sanay na may tumititig sa akin ng ganoon. I mean, my gosh baka kasi parang unggoy ako or may dumi sa mukha ko kaya ganoon?“Like what?” sabi niya. Napabuntonghininga na lamang ako habang nakatitig sa kanya at naka-crossed arms. I turned my head towards him.“Gaya ng ginagawa mo ngayon, tigilan mo iyan,” Then I look away, tapos kinuha ko iyong notes ko at doon na lang tumingin.“Can’t I stare at something beautiful?”His words almost make me choke. Sigurado akong maibubuhos
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Endless Soul Chapter 51 -
Ang bilis lagi ng panahon. It seemed like only yesterday I was still in pain and was about to give-up. I felt like I experienced heart break all the time. But surprisingly though, I did what was necessary to move forward.Based sa experience, life would always hit you the hard way. Na parang feeling mo nalumpo ka not just physically but the whole aspect of your life? I do not want delays as much as possible kasi sayang sa oras, dahil sabi ko nga mabilis lang ang pagtakbo ng panahon. A day feels like just an hour, a month feels like a one or two weeks, and years now feels like few months. Ni hindi mo na nga mamalayan na magbabagong taon na naman o magbi-birthday ka.LEXUS: Sorry, can’t pick you up. Emergency meeting. I’ll send a cab instead. – a text from Lexus. Bihis na bihis na ako at naghihintay na lang ng text niya kung nasa labas na siya but this was the message I got from him.Nainis ako yes, but since he said it’s an emergency, I understand. Kasi minsan ganyan din ako, last minu
Endless Soul Chapter 50 - Sneaky Boy
The thing about of your ex is that, no matter how you both broke-up, the fact that he or she still have this effect on you, even if it’s not in a romantic way, it is still an effect.“W-what?” I said stuttering because he’s really fuming mad right now.“What are you doing?” iritadong bungad niya. Nakadugtong ang makapal niyang kilay at naghihintay ng isasagot ko.“Uhh, wala naman akong ginagawa…nakaupo lang naman kanina...” I sad nervously not wanting to add much information.“Really? Just seating there?”“Oo, tapos kausap lang si ano…” tanging nasabi ko at hindi ko na nadugtungan pa. “Anyway, bakit ka umalis doon eh mukhang hindi pa naman tapos iyong palaro?” I tried to change the topic.“Because I am mad,” agap niya. “Anong pinag-usapan n’yong dalawa?” sunod na tanong niya.“Just about life...and some stuffs.” I said. Ni hindi ko nga ma-imagine na first lang naman naming magkita pero nakapag-converse kaagad ng mga ganoong ganap sa life namin which is very unusual. Kasi kapag hindi n
Endless Soul Chapter 49 - Let’s Talk
All I could hear inside the car is the sound of his fingers tapping. First of all, ayokong magsalita dahil wala naman akong sasabihing importante. Pangalawa, just like what I said – I’m too embarrassed about what I did. Third, for some reason - I felt like, isang mali iyong pagkikita namin kahit coincidence lang naman ang lahat.I don’t like where this thing is heading to. Especially now that he knows what happened while he was away.“Thank you,” I said pagkatapos ko siyang intayin na makababa. And I regret waiting for him to get out of the car dahil malamig niya akong tiningnan at parang kanina pa pinipigilang magsalita.Isang beses siyang humakbang papalapit sa akin. Nanatiling ganoon ang ekspresyon niya habang nakalagay sa dalawang bulsa ng kanyang pantalong ang kanyang mga kamay. His eyes were becoming darker as it was, seems like mad, and pissed – a combination of those emotions.“You’re unbelievable…” he uttered, much more pissed right now.“What do you mean?” I said, getting
Endless Soul Chapter 48 - He Stand’s Out
At first, he was declining my kisses saying that I was just drunk and I didn’t know what I am doing, and that I will regret what will happen the next morning. But I never really cared about all the stuffs he said, I just focused myself in between my kisses to him.Despite him declining, I felt some of his responses, and I know he will never be able to resist my effect on him. He’ll never will.And at this moment. I just…wanted to feel him.I just wanted him to feel me. To fill, and make me whole. I don’t know if this is my desperate-self calling or I just want it for some reason, I just really don’t care anymore. I just want to own him this night.I stopped kissing him because I needed to breathe. And as I stopped, I saw his forehead creased and confused.“I just need air.” sabi ko sa kanya dahil alam ko na ang kinukunot ng noo nito.“Tss…” was all he could say. Lumayo siya sa akin, and for a moment I know there will be no kissing to happen. The distance he made was kind of a cue for
Endless Soul Chapter 47 - Years After Years
“Naiilang ka ba?” he suddenly asked me. Sina Kaila at Cha ay busy makipag-usap at magtawanan kina Nigel at Gian kaya hindi na nila napansin na kinausap ako ni Lexus.“Bakit mo naman natanong?” I asked back. He just shrugged his shoulders. Inayos niya ang pagkakaupo niya at saka tuluyan nang itinuon ang atensyon sa akin. Grabe, namiss ko siya, namiss ko ‘yong law school life ko noon kasi study-budy talaga kaming dalawa sa Osiris.“You feel so awkward, lilipat na lang kami ng table kung hindi ka komportable.” He sincerely said. Seriously? He really thinks I am uncomfortable with him here? O ganoon ba ang sinasabi ng mga galaw ko?It’s just…it’s hard. I mean, we had a past. I know before we parted ways naging klaro na sa aming dalawa ang lahat. Our time talking about what happened isn’t ideal, it’s a small time but it catches a lot of gaps that it should be filled with before.Nahihiya akong sabihin sa kanya na after all ay kahit matino naman kaming nag-usap sa closure namin ay awkward p
Endless Soul Chapter 46 - Meeting him again
On the way home after a long day. “My love, if you’re out there send me a sign.” I said.I am a mix of contradictions: sad and entirely unhappy, alone, mourning, tired, drained, unmotivated, loss of will, and a wife with no husband. I feel loved by so many and yet no longer by one in particular.I am a woman whose husband has died. He is not late nor lost. He hasn’t passed. He is absent but not erased. I catch a glimpse of him in the curve of her mother’s jaw and the lilt of his laugh in the recorded video. He inhabits my dream world, making star appearances. I know him so well that, like a favourite character in a book, I can imagine him into any situation. But now he’s gone, I don’t know how to make the star appear again.Conan left me, but our relationship outlives him. I am grateful for the independent self that was fostered in our marriage as I carve a lone way forward through this surreal new world —although altered, I too am not late, passed or lost. But this independence has a
Endless Soul Chapter 45 - We are still we
“How are you?” Conan asked me after he wakes up. Tumulo agad ang luha ko dahil sa tanong niya. I should be the one asking him that question and not him, but for some reason I just couldn’t ask him. I just remained there, sitting while holding his hands.“You…scared me,” I said. I couldn’t stand watching him kaya tumayo ako at tumalikod sa kanya saka umiyak. My cries were silent with my hands on my mouth to prevent any sound to come-out. But it seems like, crying that way adds more pain in my heart.“I’m sorry…” was all he could say. And in a swift motion of mine, I walked towards him, and hugged him. The hug was the first time in my life that I felt no comfort, but only pain that in no time, he will leave this world with only memories of ours remain.The sad thing about life is that, one of your loved ones will eventually leave you. Bereavement as they say.I know that death is inevitable, it is a certainty of life that everyone will face. Pero iba pa rin talaga kapag ikaw na iyong na
Endless Soul Chapter 44 - History
Marriage.It is something two people are committed to. Something more than physical touch, but more on growing into the years, and learns a lot of lessons in general.Growing up, many of us learned that true love involves princesses and guards, battles and happily ever after. But the real world just doesn’t work that way. Love isn’t always romantic as it is like how we seen in the movies. But love may be can cause pain, but never the fear.It was in a totally happy marriage, maybe an ideal one for some people. But marriage isn’t perfect, we sometimes argue about things, won’t dare to speak in each other, but we get back on to it and reflect what we did. Mayroon pa nga siyang special notebook kung saan isinusulat niya ang ilan sa mga sinasabi ko. He even makes me sign them so that the next time I clam I never said it, he can show me my own signed words. Ganoon siya.But nowadays are different, he looked sad – I could tell because I was sad too, and scared.“Are you like…going to be oka
Endless Soul Chapter 43 - Our Times, was…great
The one we tried to console with sometimes are distorted and vague that we sometimes struggle to comprehend things. Sometimes, we often closed our minds to accept truths, and refuse to ask.“Why did you left me that day and said those hurtful words? Why did you left me when I needed you the most?” malungkot na tanong ko.His eyes widened. His lips also parted…maybe because he didn’t expect that it will be directly a tough question to begin. He looked dumbfounded, shocked, and looks like didn’t know how to speak, seems like he lost words. But I waited for him to process my question, but minutes had passed and all I could get is silence.I smiled sadly, even after everything, he couldn’t still tell me things right on hand. “Minahal mo ba talaga ako?” I said. Halos hindi ko maitago ang dala ng pait ng boses ko, masyadong transparent kung gaano ko paulit-ulit na tinatanong sa sarili ko kung mahal ba niya talaga ako.Umiling siya nang sunod-sunod. “I loved you…” mahinang sagot niya. He loo
