Chapter 1: Selah's day

"For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this age, against spiritual hosts of wickedness in the heavenly places."

I sighed as I watched him from afar. "Great battles are won in prayer," I muttered and took out a lollipop from my bag and sucked it. Sweet.

Life would become any sweeter if I often focused on winning souls. But it didn't turn out the way I wanted it, I can't have my breakthrough.

The moment I placed my eyes on him, there I already knew that he was detained by darkness. His raven irises scream for help and behind his cold emotion, I knew he was in deep grief.

I never saw him smile, his serious tone of voice was trying to enclose the pain he always wanted to voice out. I once thought I was the only one who suffered a bitter life, but whenever I see him, he is way more gloomy and dull than I am.

He's shattered and ruined, and here I am doing my best to give him relief. His presence scares me the first time I saw him, but I figured out that there is nothing to be afraid of. Darkness fears the light, and I have that lamp within me. At least I still have that little light inside me.

Jesus who lives within me is greater than he who lives in the world. I do believe that I can pull him out from that deep darkness.

The beast who lives inside his head wants to play, and I must say do not play with him. Do not play with Archer.

_____

She put on her hoody and wiped out the stain of blood on her lips as she took the courage to open the door of their house. She knew she would be doomed the moment her brother found out that she got into trouble again. She got into a fight, as usual. She has her reasons, and she badly wants to turn her life upside down. Selah Damson is so desperate for a change that she wants it to happen right away.

The lady silently snuck into the living room and had her way to the hall, but she frowned and cussed in silence when she smelled the cigarette smoke. It eventually envelops the entire room and the smell of it often scares her because they also mean the presence of someone who had known nothing but to keep her crying.

"Look who's finally here." Selah stiffed on her way when she heard the familiar voice of her brother. She cussed in her mind and clenched her fist the moment she sensed him behind her.

"I'll go to my room now," she calmly said and was about to walk away when Krouen took an empty bottle and dared to throw it in her direction.

"Damn you!" His voice became piercing and it seems that at any moment he will explode in anger.

The sound of breaking bottles made Selah flinch as she took a step back. Fear can be seen in her eyes, but again, she didn't let the man behind her see that she was trembling inside. That man loves it when she's weak. He loves to see her afraid of the bruises she is gonna get from his hands. She had enough of his bad treatment, she would blame him for becoming a monster like him. Selah knows she will be tasting her blood if she will talk back or do something he dislikes. She won't give him another wave of satisfaction by making her fear obvious.

The man grabbed her arm in a way no brother should hold their sister. Her face twitched a little because of the pain. Another pain will stain her again, and she is so sick of the same feeling she gets from society.

"You're staying here," her brother said firmly. Selah bit her lower lip as she tries to stop herself from doing anything that will trigger his anger.

"Damn this life," she whispered and her brother snapped.

"What did you just say?"

He received no answer, and he felt a sudden annoyance when he heard that she knows how to talk back to him. "Could you repeat that?" He demanded and began to walk in her direction. Those heavy steps say it all, he is itching to bruise her face.

"Damn you!" Selah blurted out when she felt his hands pulling her hair, she was trying to hold back her tears despite the pain. These same scenarios constantly happen, and it is giving her more than trauma. She could wish for her brother's death but she's desperately trying not to. He had so much to repent from.

"Do you want me to paint you red?" Krouen hissed and slapped her hard in the face.

"Let go of me," she asked in a low voice. Selah thought he would let go of his grip. But Krouen wasn't done yet. Her eyes widened in shock when he pulled her closer to him and grasped her hair again, causing the strands to be plucked out and scattered in the air.

"Enough!" she cried and tried her best to create distance between them. Her tears could fill a bucket halfway, and as she distanced herself from him, she couldn't help but sit on the wooden floor and sob in bitterness.

In her eyes, he is a monster.

"Get away from me!" She squeezed her eyes shut because she could not hold her tears anymore. Krouen, feeling satisfied upon seeing her crying in pain, attempted to come closer but he only let a smirk escape from his lips when she quickly arose from crouching and ran into her room.

"Coward," he muttered and shook his head. "You're brave when you're having a fight with other people, huh? You're a failure, Selah. Keep that in mind, you are nothing but a failure." Running his fingers through his hair, he walked back to the living room and sat comfortably in his favorite spot, and proceeded to watch the television.

Selah feels so heavy. She's in pain. She knows her brother will end up hurting her until he is satisfied. She hates the thought of experiencing the same thing over and over again, not just because her friends would make fun of her when they see her fresh bruises and wounds, but because she doesn't deserve being beaten until she's half-dead. She's a human. And she's his sister. "I'm not a failure, and I will never become one."

Having calmed down for a bit, she simply sighed, realizing that she can do nothing about it anymore. He's been like that since forever. And she believes, that no matter what happens, she could overcome all the mess she has experienced.

When she reached her bedroom, she hurriedly locked the door and let herself fall on the soft floormat. She has to endure it this time, she won't let him touch her again or at least scare her to death. "If Dad is here, this probably won't happen." Selah didn't withhold her tears from running like streams of water again. She began to sob and bury her face in her knees while laying sideways.

Their parents went away to manage their enterprises in London, they thought their children could manage to live by themselves while they were away. However, it didn't go well with what they were expecting. Krouen grew up being violent, having no father around him, he thought he could stand alone and fight for his mother.

His viewpoint soon changed when his mother met Selah's father, he did not know that he would feel so safe around the new family. Yet this time, he felt jealous of how his stepfather gives his attention to his only daughter, Selah Damson. He thought he could own all his attention, but he felt envious the most. That emotion pushes him to hate his stepsister, and it creates violence, he ends up hurting her until now.

In his eyes, she is nothing but a drag. Yet, without his knowledge, his violence triggered Selah to become someone she is not. His words trigger her heart to be violent like him, she constantly gets into fights. Varied reasons maybe, but deep within, it was mainly because Selah was looking for a sense of dominance, a sense of strength. Things are taken away from her by the cruelty of her stepbrother.

But this time, Selah got into a fight because she was defending her faith. A faith that Krouen did not even know in the very first place.

Selah fell asleep while crying and trembling, lying on the floor. When nighttime came, Krouen was the one who was assigned to cook their dinner. He was somewhat feeling guilty about what he had done but his pride could not go any lower, he did not think of asking for an apology. "Damn, what should I do with that brat?" He whispered while preparing the plates on the table.

He walked near the kitchen cabinet and was planning to take his phone to contact his sister, probably due to how lazy he is to call her out or knock on her room. "She is wasting my time," Krouen muttered again.

He withdrew his hand from touching his mobile and turned his way toward her bedroom. He's got to do something to lessen the guilt he was feeling, it will never be his thing to apologize, not in his wildest dreams. That is how he is, an egoistic horn-mad.

When he reached the door, he was a bit hesitant to knock. "What is she doing at this hour? She should be out by now since it's dinner time," he mumbled to himself.

Krouen gulped before having the courage to knock on the door of Selah's room and with his usual grumpy face, he continued to bust the door. "Selah! Don't make me wait! Dinner is ready!."

He did not receive any response. On the other hand, Selah woke up because of the loud bang from outside. She gently moved and crouched on the floor, her body is aching and her scalp feels like it was bleeding. She slowly stood up and walked near the drawer and took a hairbrush. Her eyes pass by the portraits on her walls, it was the canvas she painted months ago. She fixed her messy hair and gently brushed them. Selah was flinching, she was badly hurt. "What time is it?"

She heard the same loud knocks and it triggered her heart to jump in fear. She hurriedly walked near the doorway and opened it, her eyes widened in surprise when she saw him. Out of fear, she unconsciously stepped back and lowered her head.

"What took you so long? I told you to come out and hurry for dinner!" Krouen shouted with a glare. He noticed how Selah drew herself back inside so he was alarmed and tried to calm himself.

He knew he was about to blurt out hurtful words again or worse, he would end up laying a finger on her. "Come on, let's go and eat." He was breathing deeply to prevent himself from bursting into anger, "Hurry up."

They had their dinner and Selah was the one who washed the dishes. Meanwhile, Krouen headed himself to his room and prepared to sleep. He feels dizzy with the liquor he drank earlier, yet he is used to the strange sensation that makes him feel tired all the time. Alcoholic drinks became his way to catch more sleep, he would knock himself down and leave the bottles empty on the floor.

When morning shines, Selah wakes up feeling empty, as usual. She stared outside the window and saw the other kids playing at the nearby playground. "Another morning, another pain I guess?" She whispered and sighed. She has been struggling to encourage herself, waking up is becoming tough for her. Who would ever want to wake up if all you could encounter and feel are the negative emotions that the world could offer?

She hurried her way outside her room and noticed that her brother hasn't woken up yet. Selah, being afraid to encounter him along the way, decided to cook her own meal and prepared her stuff to go out and run to school. It was seven o'clock in the morning and she knows it is too early to go to school, but she cannot stay calm when she is at home, too.

She took her phone and went out of her room, making silent steps out of the house, and gently swung the door closed. "Selah!" She was alarmed when somebody from the road called for her name, she quickly jumped off their yard and ran away.

"Selah! Why on earth are you running?!" She ran more when she heard the familiar voice again. It was her friend Anna Harper who happens to pass by their street to have her bike and visit her too.

"Hey, wait up!"

Selah only stops her feet from jogging when she sees that they are far from her house. "Girl, what's wrong with you?" Anna feels like she is running out of air. They were heaving and chasing their breaths.

"I'm going to school," Selah uttered and walked ahead of her.

Anna, on the other hand, felt a bit confused. She always catches Selah going out early in the morning to attend school and it makes her curious. Her friend never mentioned anything, so she thought she was just trying to be punctual. But this time, Anna was convicted of paying attention to her.

"Wait, did you have breakfast?" When she came closer, she noticed the small bruises on her friend's face. She knew something had come up, but it might be too sensitive to ask about.

"Yeah." Selah feels tired and she is somewhat not in her best mood to interact with a friend. Her response made Anna understand right away so she simply smiled at her and shrugged off.

"You should come with me when you have free time later, I'll bring you somewhere you will really enjoy." When Anna saw that Selah did not even glance at her, she let go of a sigh before turning her back to her friend.

Selah didn't speak nor nod her head. "I'm so tired," she whispered and stood there quietly. Hopelessness began to be visible on her face, yet she still managed to proceed to walk. "I better go and wait till the class starts. Hopefully, I'll encounter something more thrilling and fun," she added and gazed at the sky.