I woke up to the gentle hum of the just city beyond my window, the sun's first light filtering through the drapes. It was a quiet morning, free of the weights of workloads. I stretched, breathed deeply, and reveled in the smell of fresh linens and paint in the air—a home aroma that I had missed.It had been weeks since Mike and I returned. The transition had been smoother than I had imagined. The city was the same, the streets still throbbed the same, but I was different. I was no longer the fractured woman who had leave to heal. I had healed. I had crossed seas, strolled through ruins, and walked beneath skies Elon never had the chance to wander. And in going through it all, I wrote in his journal. Each letter, each dip of my pen, connecting me to him. My travels became his, my memories akin to what could have been his if only he lived.And somehow, it was as though he was present with me in every break of dawn and every foreign street.Mike accompanied me during those times— for mor
I didn't want to continue argue with him. I didn't want to stay standing here, gawking at him, judging for whatever he would say because we both knew I'll never be able to believe him. There was no point.So, I gave him a once-over, before I slowly trudged in. But just as I was supposed to walked away from him, I felt a hand on my wrist."Are you not going to ask what happened to me? Aren't you curious?""Why would I be?" I asked, jiggling my wrist for release. "You're dead to me."Those words will hunt him. He probably didn't expect I'd say those after all these years we hadn't seen each other, but I couldn't care less.I was able to took back my arm from him, and when I did, I continued walking and didn't look back. He didn't pursue me any longer either— which was better for the both of us.We were nothing beside strangers now, and a conversation wouldn't do us any good.I headed back to my gallery after that, where Mike and Alicia were waiting for me. They were at the main office,
After dinner, the gallery quieted down to a comfortable hush. The takeout containers from leftovers were on the desk, and Alicia was scrolling through her phone, most likely reading the emails she'd put off eating. Mike settled back into his chair, his eyes straying in my direction every so often but not speaking much.Abby had already caught on.She always caught on."You're working late again?" she asked, putting on her coat.I shrugged. "Might as well. Got some things to wrap up."She looked at me knowingly but didn't push. "Alright. Don't burn yourself out."Alicia yawned, stretching her arms above her head before standing. "I should get going, too. Text if you need anything.""Will do."One by one, they left, their goodbyes soft in the quiet space. The gallery always felt different at night—still, untouched, like it existed in its own pocket of time.Mike hadn’t left yet.He was still in his chair, watching me. Not in an expectant way, not like he was waiting for me to say someth
The apartment was quiet when I stepped inside. I closed the door behind me, took off my shoes, and coat, draping it over the chair by the door instead of hanging it up. I had to go to bed. It was late and I was tired, but my mind would not relax.I went into the kitchen and poured myself a glass of water because I wanted to keep my hands occupied. The lights of the city shone outside the window, distant and static. I drank slowly and leaned against the counter.My phone was vibrating on the table.Mike.You alright?I exhaled rapidly and shook my head. I didn't know why I was surprised. He always listened. Even when I didn't want him to.Yes. You?He responded after a few seconds.You know me. Always okay.I stared at the screen. I could imagine him saying it, that small smile in his voice, the way he always evaded answering without technically lying.I didn't respond. I had no idea what to say.I put my phone on the counter, had another sip of water, and shut off the kitchen light.
“The number you are calling is busy at the moment. Please try your call later.”“Really? Your husband is out of reach, out of all goddamn time?” Abby scorned. “What is Damian up to these days? Does he even know that your son is sick?”A forced smile was the only thing I could give Abby. Truth be told, reaching out to Damian has started to become more difficult these days. He was always busy, as he always say. There was even a time he wasn’t going home for a couple of days straight. He would send a message that he wouldn’t, though.But I wouldn’t tell Abby. She would definitely blow. She would get mad at Damian, and that was the least thing I’d want in this situation.My son was sick. He was inside the room beside us, and a fight or an argument wouldn’t help Elon to become better.I sighed, before I put my phone on my back pocket to head inside the room.“Mommy…” Elon wearily called me as I walked in. “Is daddy coming?”My chest tightened. I tried to smile to reassure Elon but I wasn’t
My sister was an actress. She was a child star. Growing up, there had always been a comparison between us. She was talented, whilst I only excel academically. She can dance. She can sing. She was a very good actress, and her trophies and awards can vouch for it.Of course, that put me in a lot of pressure. I felt like I had to do better. I felt like I had to follow my sister so I wouldn’t be left behind. But no matter what I did, I never catch up to her. She was that good.So when Elizabeth insisted to be a surrogate mother for my child, instead of finding another that lived overseas, I was confused.Elizabeth was already living her best life. She was surrounded by acclaim, pursued by many bachelors, and in the peak of her career. Personally, any woman would’ve dreamed to be in her position. Even I, as a kid, hoped to be Elizabeth even for a day.“Now I see it…” I whispered, inwardly realizing it.“You know, Eleanor, I find it ridiculous that you’re here looking for your husband at th
A reluctant smile curved my lips as soon as I emptied my glass. I breathed hard, then looked up to meet the cold breeze and ease all the troubling thoughts in my head, but somehow the glittering stars, and peaceful night sky couldn’t make the cut.I wasn’t sure if it was the alcohol that tasted bitter, or the feeling weighing down my chest, but no matter how much I drink, I could still vividly remember my last conversation with Damian.What a ruthless husband. How can he shamelessly ask me for a divorce right after I overlooked his scandalous affair?I chuckled humorlessly.“Tell me what happened.” Abby demanded as soon as she was close enough for me to hear her. “Where the fuck was your husband all these time? He was not wearing his attire, and do not dare lie to save his ass. He wasn’t at work. So where was he?”Abby was fuming. I saw that coming. If the situation was something I could bear alone I wouldn’t have called for her but what happened today was too much. I wanted to cry, s
I wasn’t able to pick myself up easily even after half an hour they left. I was hyperventilating. I cried my heart out as I try to release the pain I had been trying to keep deep inside my chest. My eyes had turned red and sunken by the time my tears subsided so I still couldn’t go to the hospital. To kill time, I went to my art gallery, and read emails from my clients to review their offers.“Are we going to push through with the auction to be held tomorrow night? I have received feedback from the announcement and invitations we sent, but we could delay it for a week. I’m sure they will understand if they hear your reason—”I shook my head, and cut off Alicia. “They do not need to know about Elon’s condition, Alicia. I cannot disappoint my guests either. We will push through with the auction. Is everything ready?”Alicia nodded. “Yes, Mrs. Alistair…”Mrs. Alistair…“I suggest you start calling me by my name and not by my husband’s…” I pushed back my body and looked at Alicia. “How is
The apartment was quiet when I stepped inside. I closed the door behind me, took off my shoes, and coat, draping it over the chair by the door instead of hanging it up. I had to go to bed. It was late and I was tired, but my mind would not relax.I went into the kitchen and poured myself a glass of water because I wanted to keep my hands occupied. The lights of the city shone outside the window, distant and static. I drank slowly and leaned against the counter.My phone was vibrating on the table.Mike.You alright?I exhaled rapidly and shook my head. I didn't know why I was surprised. He always listened. Even when I didn't want him to.Yes. You?He responded after a few seconds.You know me. Always okay.I stared at the screen. I could imagine him saying it, that small smile in his voice, the way he always evaded answering without technically lying.I didn't respond. I had no idea what to say.I put my phone on the counter, had another sip of water, and shut off the kitchen light.
After dinner, the gallery quieted down to a comfortable hush. The takeout containers from leftovers were on the desk, and Alicia was scrolling through her phone, most likely reading the emails she'd put off eating. Mike settled back into his chair, his eyes straying in my direction every so often but not speaking much.Abby had already caught on.She always caught on."You're working late again?" she asked, putting on her coat.I shrugged. "Might as well. Got some things to wrap up."She looked at me knowingly but didn't push. "Alright. Don't burn yourself out."Alicia yawned, stretching her arms above her head before standing. "I should get going, too. Text if you need anything.""Will do."One by one, they left, their goodbyes soft in the quiet space. The gallery always felt different at night—still, untouched, like it existed in its own pocket of time.Mike hadn’t left yet.He was still in his chair, watching me. Not in an expectant way, not like he was waiting for me to say someth
I didn't want to continue argue with him. I didn't want to stay standing here, gawking at him, judging for whatever he would say because we both knew I'll never be able to believe him. There was no point.So, I gave him a once-over, before I slowly trudged in. But just as I was supposed to walked away from him, I felt a hand on my wrist."Are you not going to ask what happened to me? Aren't you curious?""Why would I be?" I asked, jiggling my wrist for release. "You're dead to me."Those words will hunt him. He probably didn't expect I'd say those after all these years we hadn't seen each other, but I couldn't care less.I was able to took back my arm from him, and when I did, I continued walking and didn't look back. He didn't pursue me any longer either— which was better for the both of us.We were nothing beside strangers now, and a conversation wouldn't do us any good.I headed back to my gallery after that, where Mike and Alicia were waiting for me. They were at the main office,
I woke up to the gentle hum of the just city beyond my window, the sun's first light filtering through the drapes. It was a quiet morning, free of the weights of workloads. I stretched, breathed deeply, and reveled in the smell of fresh linens and paint in the air—a home aroma that I had missed.It had been weeks since Mike and I returned. The transition had been smoother than I had imagined. The city was the same, the streets still throbbed the same, but I was different. I was no longer the fractured woman who had leave to heal. I had healed. I had crossed seas, strolled through ruins, and walked beneath skies Elon never had the chance to wander. And in going through it all, I wrote in his journal. Each letter, each dip of my pen, connecting me to him. My travels became his, my memories akin to what could have been his if only he lived.And somehow, it was as though he was present with me in every break of dawn and every foreign street.Mike accompanied me during those times— for mor
What Mike had said stuck with me. I stewed over it for days and let the words occupy the vacant space I didn't realize existed.It was a peaceful morning. Sun streamed through the blinds of our tiny rental apartment in a city I enjoyed but would eventually abandon. That was when I made a choice and half-heartedly told Mike that it was time to head back home.I did not want to go, really. I had learned something special this year—something good and freeing. But it was not going to last. I knew that the entire time. Maybe, in a sense, the trip had already done what it was supposed to: heal me from all the pain and trauma.At some point, we couldn't keep doing this—traveling. And I knew that. So, we booked our tickets home, packed our bags, bought souvenirs.The city did not shift when we returned. That was the first thing I noticed, and perhaps the most strange. It was as if it had waited for us, as if nothing had been disturbed. People still walked the streets, the same coffee houses s
The next day, I really left.The first night out of the town was strange to me—like freedom and something I couldn't quite comprehend myself. We rode a plane that soared through the air in silence as we departed, and when we arrived, the air gave me a different feeling. It was thicker and foreign. It was as if I had entered someone's dream. It was as if I had entered Elon's.We didn't really have a plan. We had a list of places that Elon had written in. Cities he circled in travel guides, underlined in the newspaper, and spoke of as if he knew he'd never live to see. So, I wrote for him. I started writing in his journal—first, just scribbles. Dates. Places. How the sidewalk felt beneath my feet, how the ocean echoed in a city he never visited. Then it became more. I wrote to him, as if he could read my words, as if he could follow me in the pages. By taking his journal and making it mine, I hoped to allow him to travel through me.The months went by like that. The ink from my pen tra
Morning came slowly, and sunlight dragged through the windows as an afterthought. And then my head throbbed, but not like grief did. Too many drinks, too much laughter, and just too much life for the first time in what seemed like forever left a dull ache.My body weight felt different. So I guess it was just not like the air was settling into my mattress and destroying me with images of a life that never happened.And then he appeared—Mike.Jacket and boots were tossed over the couch. His chair across from me was crossed with arms and a head tilted back—he was asleep. Peaceful. Thinking of him in that way made me feel something weird in my chest that I had not felt in a while. Comfort. Safety.Sitting up too quickly made me feel sick—nausea turned my stomach. That motion probably got him awake because he cracked an eye open and smiled lazily."You look like hell.""Thanks." The sleep and dehydration made my voice rough. I swallowed, rubbing my eyes. "What time is it?""Little past te
The night air was cold against my skin on the porch as I wrapped my fingers around a pot of tea. Distant cars hummed, leaves rubbed against each other, and it was the silence I had grown accustomed to. The last few weeks, I had been locked in this state, crying in a house that was more mausoleum than home.Yet somehow, tonight felt different. Perhaps it was the pain of carrying so much suffering for so long, or maybe the silver moonlight bathing the street lit something I had gone blind to. Whatever the reason, the words flew off my lips before I could stop them."I can't do this again."That realization settled in my chest—heavy, liberating. But it never felt complete—yet. As if drawn by something unseen, I stood and walked inside slowly but deliberately. My feet carried me up the steps, through the hall, and to the attic door. I hesitated before pushing it open, the musty scent of old wood and forgotten things greeting me.My fingers searched against dusty shelves for something—anyt
"You really want to pick yourself up, Eleanor?"I stared at him, my fingers floppy around the edge of the blanket, my mind sluggish from days of barely moving, barely eating. The weight of his question sat between us. Did I? Did I want to be better, or was I just pretending because I was tired of seeing his disappointment? My lips parted, but I hesitated. And then, slowly, I nodded.Mike studied me, unreadable. He took a deep breath and leaned back slightly, his gaze moving toward the ceiling as if debating something. When he finally spoke, his words were unexpected."Run away with me. Leave this town."I saw him blink. I scoffed—a weak, breathy sound barely above a laugh. "Don't be ridiculous, Mike."He didn't correct me. He just watched as I shook my head and brushed it away like it was nothing. Perhaps, to him, it wasn't nothing. But to me, it was absurd. Leaving the place that held every shattered piece of me was never an option. I could barely dream.This was my punishment. Stayi